The One Where Rachel Is Late

Ross

Hey! What are you guys looking at?

嘿！你们在看什么？

Joey

Oh, it's a poster for that World War I movie that I'm in, check it out.

哦，是我参演的一战电影的海报，快看。

Ross

Yeah? Wow! It looks really violent!

是吗？哇！看起来好暴力！

Joey

Uh-huh! I know. I'm coming soon to a theater near you! I'm in THX! I'm unsuitable for children!

可不是嘛！我知道。我很快就要在你附近的影院上映了！我可是THX音效认证的！少儿不宜！

Ross

Now I cannot wait to see this.

我都等不及要看了。

Joey

Yeah, yeah, it's already generating Oscar buzz.

是啊是啊，已经有奥斯卡的热度了。

Phoebe

I started that!

那热度是我炒起来的！

Joey

I thought I did! Oh hey guess what? The premiere is next week and you're all invited! (They all gasp.)

我还以为是我！哦对了，猜猜？下周首映，你们都被邀请了！（众人惊叹。）

Monica

Are we gonna take a limo?

我们坐豪华轿车去吗？

Joey

Sure! Why not?!

当然！有何不可？！

Monica

Oh I love taking limos when nobody died!

我就喜欢这种没死人也能坐豪华轿车的感觉！

Rachel

Well obviously I won't be able to come, for those of you who haven't checked their calendars today is my due date. Well y'know, I just want to take a moment and thank you guys for how great you've been during this time. I really couldn't have done it without you. And I have loved these last nine months! And even though I am so looking forward to the next part, I am really gonna miss being pregnant.

好吧，我肯定去不了了，没看日历的人注意，今天是我的预产期。你们知道吗，我想花点时间谢谢大家这段时间的照顾。没有你们我真的撑不下来。我超爱过去这九个月！虽然我特别期待接下来的日子，但我真的会怀念怀孕的时光。

Rachel

That's right, still no baby! (To Monica, Joey, and Chandler on the couch) Come on people! Please make some room!

没错，还没生！（对着沙发上的莫妮卡、乔伊和钱德）拜托各位！挪点位置！

Ross

Uh sweetie, maybe you'd be more comfortable here? (Gets up from the green armchair.)

呃，亲爱的，坐这儿会不会舒服点？（从绿色扶手椅上起身。）

Rachel

You. Like you haven't done enough.

你。你做的好事还不够多吗。

Ross

Look, I-I know how miserable you are, I wish there was something I can do. I mean I wish I were a seahorse. (She glares at him) Because with seahorses it's the male, they carry the babies. And then also umm, I'd be far away in the sea. (He sits back down.)

你看，我知道你很难受，真希望能帮上忙。我是说，我真希望自己是只海马。（瑞秋瞪他）因为海马是雄性怀宝宝。而且，呃，我还能躲在遥远的海里。（重新坐下。）

(Rachel turns and looks at the group on the couch and they move over. Chandler measures the room they've made with his arm and decides it's not enough and they all move over again.)

（瑞秋转头看向沙发上的人，众人挪了挪。钱德用胳膊量了下腾出的空间，觉得不够，众人又挪了挪。）

Rachel

God. (Sits down.) I have never been so uncomfortable in my entire life!

天啊。（坐下。）我这辈子从没这么难受过！

Phoebe

Oh I know, I've been there. I remember toward the end…

我懂，我经历过。我记得快生的时候……

Rachel

(interrupting her) Oh Phoebe, that's a great story. Can you tell it to me when you're getting me some iced tea? (Phoebe gets up and Rachel groans.) (To the baby) Oh God, get out! Get out!! Get out!! Get out!!

（打断她）菲比，这故事真不错。你去给我拿杯冰茶的时候再讲好吗？（菲比起身，瑞秋呻吟。）（对着肚子里的宝宝）天啊，快出来！出来！出来！出来！

Chandler

Let's. (Everyone gets up and leaves Rachel.)

溜了。（众人起身离开瑞秋。）

Opening Credits

片头字幕

Chandler

Hey! Did you have the baby yet?

嘿！生了吗？

Rachel

Do you want me to come over there and sit on you? 'Cause I'll do it.

要不要我过去坐你身上？我可真敢坐。

Monica

What are you doing here so early?

你怎么这么早就来了？

Rachel

They sent me home from work. They were like, "Start your maternity leave now! Just rest, get ready for the baby." Well y'know what? Screw 'em! If they don't want me there, I'll just hang out with you guys.

“现在就休产假吧！好好休息，准备生宝宝。”你猜怎么着？去他们的！既然不想让我上班，我就来跟你们待着。

Phoebe

Or you can do volunteer work.

或者你可以去做义工。

(Joey's cell phone rings and he answers it.)

（乔伊的手机响了，他接起电话。）

Joey

Hello?

喂？

Estelle

Joey! It's Estelle! Great news, I was able to get you and one guest tickets to your premiere.

乔伊！我是埃斯特尔！好消息，我帮你弄到首映式的票了，你能带一个嘉宾。

Joey

One guest? You told me I can have six tickets!

一个嘉宾？你明明说我能有六张票！

Estelle

Well, I sold four of them on Ebay. You'll be sitting next to HotGuy372.

我在易贝上卖了四张。你会坐在“热门帅哥372”旁边。

Joey

Oh my God. So that's it?! I only get to bring one guest?

天啊。就一张？我只能带一个人？

Estelle

Yeah, what time do you wanna pick me up? (Joey hangs up on her.) Hello?

对，你几点来接我？（乔伊直接挂了电话。）喂？

Joey

(to Monica, Chandler, and Phoebe) Did you hear that? I only get one extra ticket to my premiere. So some how I have to pick between you three and Ross.

（对莫妮卡、钱德、菲比）听到了吗？我的首映式就一张额外的票。我得在你们三个和罗斯之间选一个。

Rachel

(overhearing that) What-what about me?

（听到对话）那……那我呢？

Joey

You said you didn't want to go.

你说过你不去的。

Rachel

I don't. But I would still like to be acknowledged. What? Just because I'm pregnant you think I'm invisible.

我是不去。但你们也得提我一下吧？怎么？就因为我怀孕了，你们就当我不存在？

Joey

Definitely not invisible.

绝对没把你当不存在。

Monica

Well, well Ross didn't care enough to be here, so I think he's out. You snooze you lose.

罗斯都不在乎来不来，所以他没戏了。谁缺席谁没份。

Chandler

He's not snoozing, he's teaching a class.

他不是缺席，他在上课。

Monica

Well then somebody's snoozing. Joey, not that this uh should affect you at all, but if you were to pick me, I was planning on wearing a sequined dress, cut down to here. (Points to her stomach just above her belly button.)

反正就是有人不上心。乔伊，这事儿你别受影响啊，但你要是选我，我打算穿一条亮片裙，领口开到这儿。（指了指肚脐上方的位置。）

Chandler

I haven't seen this dress.

我没见过这条裙子。

Monica

Star in a movie.

电影里的明星款。

Phoebe

Joey, you pick who ever you want. Okay? You just listen to your heart. What does it tell you? (Mimicking a heartbeat and tapping her chest.) Phoebe, Phoebe.

乔伊，你想选谁就选谁。好吗？跟着心走就行。心告诉你什么？（模仿心跳声，拍着胸口。）菲比，菲比。

Joey

Well uh…I think I want to take Chandler.

呃……我想带钱德去。

Phoebe

(still mimicking a heartbeat, only faster) Phoebe-Phoebe-Phoebe-Phoebe-Burrrrr! (Mimics the sound of a cardiac monitor going off.)

（继续模仿心跳，节奏变快）菲比-菲比-菲比-菲比——嘀嘀嘀！（模仿心电监护仪警报声。）

Chandler

You really want to take me?

你真要带我去？

Joey

Yeah! Yeah! I mean I'm sorry, I wish I can take everybody, but y'know Chandler always supported my career. He's paid for acting classes and head shots and stuff and well this will be my way of paying you back.

对！对！抱歉啊，我也想都带上，但钱德一直支持我的事业。他帮我付表演课、宣传照这些费用，这次就当是我报答你了。

Chandler

So you're never actually going to pay me back?

所以你压根就没打算还钱是吧？

Monica

Wait a minute, just because he paid for your head shots you're gonna take him? Joey, I don't think you're comprehending just how slutty this dress is!

等一下，就因为他帮你付了宣传照的钱，你就选他？乔伊，你根本不懂我那条裙子有多性感！

Joey

It's not just the stuff he paid for, I mean it's-it's everything. Y'know? He read lines with me. He-he went with me on auditions when I was really nervous, and then he consoled me after I didn't get parts that I really wanted. You always believed in me man. Even, even when I didn't believe in myself.

不只是钱的事，是所有事。你懂吗？他陪我对台词。我紧张的时候，他陪我去试镜；我没拿到心仪角色的时候，他安慰我。你一直都相信我，兄弟。哪怕我自己都不相信自己的时候。

Chandler

I always knew you were gonna make it. I'm so proud of you.

我一直就知道你会成功。我真为你骄傲。

Joey

Thanks. That means a lot to me.

谢谢。这话对我意义重大。

(They look at each other and smile for a while.)

（两人对视一笑，沉默片刻。）

Phoebe

Mon, maybe one of these guys wants to wear your dress.

莫妮卡，说不定他们俩有人想穿你的裙子呢。

Joey

(in a manly voice) I'm gonna go shave. (Gets up.)

（故作硬汉语气）我去刮胡子。（起身。）

Chandler

(in a manly voice) Yeah well, I'm gonna go spit. (He goes into the bedroom. On his way out, Joey gives Rachel a wide berth.)

（故作硬汉语气）行，我去吐口唾沫。（走进卧室。乔伊出门时，刻意离瑞秋远远的。）

Rachel

Oh, I have to pee. If I don't come out in five minutes it's because I've choked to death on the potpourri stink. (Goes into the bathroom.)

我要上厕所。要是五分钟没出来，就是被香薰的臭味呛死了。（走进浴室。）

Phoebe

When she comes out, you hold her nose, I'll blow in her mouth, and the kid will just (makes a popping sound) right out of her.

她出来后，你捏住她鼻子，我往她嘴里吹气，宝宝就会（发出啵的一声）直接蹦出来。

Monica

She's over a week late! She gotta have it today, right?

她都超期一周了！今天肯定会生，对吧？

Phoebe

I don't know. I-I think it's still gonna be a while.

不好说。我觉得还得等一阵子。

Monica

Hmm, care to make it interesting? I'll bet you that she'll have it by this time tomorrow.

要不赌一把？我赌她明天这个时候前会生。

Phoebe

You're on!

赌就赌！

Monica

Okay, how much?

好，赌多少？

Phoebe

One hundred thousand dollars!

十万美金！

Monica

How about fifty bucks?

五十块怎么样？

Phoebe

Fine! I'll call Zurich and move some money around.

行！我打电话给苏黎世那边，挪点钱出来。

Rachel

(calling from the bathroom) All right, who's turn is it to help me get up!

（浴室里喊）好了，该轮到谁扶我起来了！

(They both look at each other, then Phoebe gets an idea.)

（两人对视一眼，菲比突然有了主意。）

Phoebe

No one's here! (Monica looks at her.) Oh damnit!

没人在！（莫妮卡看着她。）该死！

Chandler

This is so exciting! It's so glamorous! People taking our picture. How do I look?

太激动了！太风光了！大家都在拍我们。我看起来怎么样？

Joey

A little tall.

有点高。

Chandler

What?

啥？

Joey

Do you mind crouching down a little bit, so that I look taller? (Chandler does so) There you go. (And they walk down the red carpet.)

能稍微蹲低点吗？这样我显得高点。（钱德照做）好了。（两人走上红毯。）

Chandler

It's just so glamorous.

真的太风光了。

Phoebe

Oh hey Mon? Rach is here! Ohh, you're still pregnant. Oh, I'm sorry. I know how uncomfortable you are. Y'know what? You look great. Yeah, like fifty bucks.

莫妮卡！瑞秋来了！哎呀，还没生啊。抱歉，我知道你很难受。你知道吗？你状态挺好的。对，值五十块钱。

Rachel

Oh, I have to go pee. Apparently this baby thinks that my bladder is a squeeze toy. (Goes to the bathroom.)

我要上厕所。这宝宝大概把我膀胱当成挤压玩具了。（走向浴室。）

Monica

Damnit! Damnit!! Here's your fifty bucks! (Pays Phoebe.)

该死！该死！给你五十块！（把钱给菲比。）

Phoebe

It's interesting that you lost. Now, I forget, do you like to lose?

你输了，真有意思。我忘了，你喜欢输吗？

Monica

Now stop it! Double or nothing that she has it by tomorrow!

别贫了！翻倍赌，她明天之前会生！

Phoebe

Fine! You're on!

行！赌就赌！

Monica

Okay.

好。

Phoebe

Until then, General Grant, why don't you set up camp (She puts the bill in her bra) right there.

在此之前，格兰特将军，把营地扎在这儿吧。（把钱塞进内衣里。）

Ross

(entering) Hey is Rachel here? We have a doctor's appointment.

（走进来）嘿，瑞秋在吗？我们约了医生。

Monica

She's in the bathroom.

她在浴室。

Ross

Rach, we gotta go.

瑞秋，我们该走了。

Rachel

In a minute!!!

马上就来！！！

Ross

People ask me why we're not together, I just don't know what to tell them.

别人问我为什么我们没在一起，我都不知道该怎么回答。

Rachel

(entering) All right, all right. Let's go!

（走出浴室）好了好了，走吧！

Ross

Uh, do you wanna go change first? The doctor's keeping the office open late for us, but if you hurry…

呃，要不要先换件衣服？医生特意等我们到很晚，你要是快点的话……

Rachel

No, I'm fine.

不用，我这样就行。

Ross

Really? You don't think that's a little inappropriate. (She's wearing a tank top and has her belly sticking out.)

真的？你不觉得有点不得体吗？（瑞秋穿着背心，肚子露在外面。）

Phoebe

Good God man don't anger it.

天啊，别惹她。

Rachel

Ross, it is 100 degrees outside. For the first time in weeks, I am somewhat comfortable.

罗斯，外面都38度了。这几周来，我头一次觉得舒服点。

Ross

Fine! Fine! Y'know what? Whatever you want. Okay? You're the mommy.

行！行！随你便吧。好吗？你是妈妈你说了算。

Rachel

Oh uh-uh pal! Don't call me mommy! It's bad enough you call your own mother that. (He looks at Monica.)

别叫我妈妈！你叫你自己妈妈也就算了。（罗斯看向莫妮卡。）

Monica

I'm actually with her on this one.

这点我站瑞秋。

Joey

(onscreen) "I thought I knew who the enemy was, but it was you all along."

（电影里的台词）“我以为我知道敌人是谁，原来一直是你。”

Joey

(To Chandler) Okay, this is it. It's my big fight scene coming up. (He looks over and Chandler and notices that he's asleep.)

（对钱德）好了，重头戏来了。我的打戏要开始了。（转头看钱德，发现他睡着了。）

Rachel

Ross.

罗斯。

Ross

Yeah?

嗯？

Rachel

Can I ask you something?

我能问你个事吗？

Ross

Uh-huh.

嗯。

Rachel

When Carol was pregnant with Ben…

卡罗怀本的时候……

Ross

Mmm?

嗯？

Rachel

…were you this irritating?

你也这么烦人吗？

Ross

Wow!

哇！

Rachel

Excuse me?!

你说什么？！

Ross

Oh nothing. Nothing! Just uh, you've been a little short with me lately. I'm not trying to irritate you.

没什么。没什么！就是，你最近对我有点冲。我不是故意惹你生气的。

Rachel

Well then you just must have a natural talent for it.

那你就是天生有这本事。

Ross

Y'know what? The doctor will be in soon, why don't we not speak until then.

要不这样？医生马上就来了，我们先别说话了。

Rachel

(silently) Okay. (Pause) Seriously, breathe louder Ross! That's great!

（小声）行。（停顿）说真的，呼吸大声点，罗斯！太好了！

Ross

Y'know we should probably ask the doctor if she even knows how to deliver a baby that's half human and half pure evil!

我们真该问问医生，她会不会接生一个半人半恶魔的宝宝！

(Dr. Long enters.)

（朗医生走进来。）

Rachel

Hi Dr. Long, how are you?

朗医生好，你好吗？

Ross

(to Rachel) Oh, you're nice to her.

（对瑞秋）哟，你对她倒是挺客气。

Rachel

She has the drugs!

她有药啊！

Dr. Long

We'll do a quick check.

我们简单检查一下。

Rachel

Okay. (Rachel lies back.)

好。（瑞秋躺下。）

Dr. Long

So, eight days late huh?

超期八天了是吧？

Rachel

Yeah.

嗯。

Dr. Long

You must be a little uncomfortable.

肯定有点难受吧。

Rachel

Eh, just a tad.

嗯，一点点。

Dr. Long

You're about 80 percent effaced, so you're on your way. It still could last a little while longer. If you're anxious there are a few ways to help things along.

宫口已经开了八成，快了。不过可能还得等一阵子。要是着急的话，有几个办法能催产。

Ross

Do them!!

快试试！！

Dr. Long

Actually, they're things you can do. Just some home remedies, but in my experience I've found that some of them are quite effective.

其实是你们自己能做的。都是些居家小方法，不过据我经验，有些还挺管用。

Rachel

Well, we are ready to try anything.

我们什么都愿意试。

Dr. Long

Okay, there's an herbal tea you can drink.

好，你们可以喝一种花草茶。

Rachel

Okay.

好。

Dr. Long

You can take some caster oil, there's eating spicy foods…

可以喝点蓖麻油，吃点辣的食物……

Rachel

Great! We will do all of those.

太好了！我们都试。

Dr. Long

…taking a long walk, and then there's the one that's proved most effective: sex.

同房。

(Rachel turns and looks at Ross.)

（瑞秋转头看向罗斯。）

Ross

You've got to be kidding me!

你在开玩笑吧！

Commercial Break

广告时间

Chandler

Good job Joe! Well done! Top notch!

演得好，乔伊！太棒了！一流！

Joey

You liked it? You really liked it?

你喜欢？你真的喜欢？

Chandler

Oh-ho-ho, yeah!

那可不！

Joey

Which part exactly?

具体哪部分？

Chandler

The whole thing! Can we go?

全程都好！我们能走了吗？

Joey

Oh no-no-no, give me some specifics.

不行不行，说点细节。

Chandler

I love the specifics, the specifics were the best part!

细节超棒，细节是最精彩的部分！

Joey

Hey, what about the scene with the kangaroo? Did-did you like that part?

那个袋鼠的镜头呢？你喜欢吗？

Chandler

I was surprised to see a kangaroo in a World War I epic.

一战史诗电影里出现袋鼠，我都惊了。

Joey

You fell asleep!! There was no kangaroo! They didn't take any of my suggestions! That's for coming buddy. I'll see you later. (Starts to walk out.)

你睡着了！根本没有袋鼠！他们没采纳我的任何建议！谢谢你来，兄弟。回头见。（准备离开。）

Chandler

Don't go! I'm sorry. I'm so sorry! (Sees another guy who is still asleep.) Look! This guy fell asleep! He fell asleep too! Be mad at him! (Looks at him more closely.) Or, call an ambulance.

别走！对不起！我错了！（看到旁边还有个人睡着了。）你看！他也睡着了！冲他发火！（凑近看了看。）或者，叫救护车吧。

Monica

Hey!

嘿！

Ross

Hey.

嘿。

Rachel

Hi!

嗨！

Monica

What did the doctor say? Any news on when the baby will come?

医生怎么说？知道什么时候生了吗？

Rachel

No. But she did give us some ideas on how to induce labor.

没有。但她给了几个催产的办法。

Ross

Yeah, we tried them all. We went for a walk, uh we tried a special tea, caster oil, spicy food nothing has worked.

我们都试了。散步、喝特制茶、蓖麻油、吃辣，都没用。

Rachel

Well, there is one thing that we haven't tried, but someone thinks that, (mimicking Ross) "That will open up a can of worms."

还有一个没试，但有人觉得，（模仿罗斯语气）“那会惹麻烦的。”

Monica

Well what is it? What is it? If it's gonna help bring the baby here, like today. I mean, I think you should do it.

是什么？是什么？要是能让宝宝今天生，我觉得你们就该试试。

Ross

It's sex.

同房。

Monica

Do it!

快去！

Ross

Monica!

莫妮卡！

Monica

I'm just saying it's been a really long time for you. I mean, women have needs. Do it, get yours!

我就是说你们好久没那个了。女人也有需求嘛。快去，满足一下！

Phoebe

Oh I-I don't know about that. No, I think that if the two of you had sex the-the-the repercussions would be catastrophic.

我不太同意。我觉得你们俩要是同房，后果会很严重。

Monica

All right, let's be practical, if Ross isn't willing to do it, he's not the only guy in the world you can have sex with. You can borrow Chandler-Chandler is good!

实际点说，要是罗斯不愿意，世界上又不是只有他一个男人。你可以找钱德，钱德很厉害的！

Ross

Monica, what is the matter with you?

莫妮卡，你怎么回事？

Monica

Nothing. I just want the baby to be born today.

没什么，我就是想让宝宝今天生。

Rachel

Why? Why today?

为什么非要今天？

Monica

Okay fine! I keep betting Phoebe that you're gonna have the baby and I don't want to lose again!

好吧，我跟菲比打赌你会生，我不想再输了！

Ross

What?! While she's been going through this hell, you've been making money?! You're betting on your friend staying in this misery?! (Phoebe lowers her head and shakes it yes.)

什么？！她遭这么大罪，你们还在赌钱？！拿朋友的痛苦打赌？！（菲比低头点头承认。）

Rachel

I'll take that bet.

我也赌。

Ross

What?!

什么？！

Rachel

Well, I'm miserable here! I might as well make some money out it!

反正我这么难受！不如趁机赚点钱！

Ross

Can I get some of that action?

我能加入吗？

Monica

Wait a minute! Now I'm betting against all three of you?

等一下！我现在要跟你们三个赌？

Rachel

Oh honey, don't worry. I really do feel like tomorrow's the day.

别担心，我真觉得明天会生。

Monica

Oh, okay!

好！

(Rachel turns her head to Ross and Phoebe and mouths, "No way.")

“不可能。”）

Joey

Hey! Sleeping beauty!

嘿！睡美人！

Chandler

Where have you been?! I tried to call you! I want to talk to you! I still feel so bad!

你去哪了？！我给你打电话了！我想跟你聊聊！我一直很愧疚！

Joey

(in a baby voice) Oh no, were you upset? Did you lose sleep?

（模仿婴儿语气）哦，你难过啦？睡不着觉啦？

Chandler

I'm so sorry.

我真的很抱歉。

Joey

Uh-huh look, the only reason I can over here was to settle things between us! Okay? You've done a lot for me and my career, I wanted to pay you back so I took you to the premiere but you missed it! Okay, so how much do I owe you?

我来这就是想把我们的事说清楚！好吗？你帮了我和我的事业很多，我想报答你才带你去首映，结果你睡着了！说吧，我欠你多少钱？

Chandler

What?!

啥？！

Joey

Give me a number, I don't want to owe you anything!

说个数，我不想欠你人情！

Chandler

You don't owe me anything, I don't want you money…

你不欠我什么，我不要你钱……

Joey

Ah-ah-ah! We're doing this! Okay, now you got me my first set of head shots. Right, how much were those?

别废话！就这么定了！你帮我拍了第一套宣传照，多少钱？

Chandler

I don't know, five hundred dollars?

不知道，五百刀？

Joey

Okay, five hundred dollars. What else?

好，五百。还有呢？

Chandler

Well then there was the second set, the infamous booger head shots.

还有第二套，就是那张出名的鼻涕照。

Joey

Okay, so that's another five hundred. Five hundred and five hundred, that's… (Pauses to figure it out.)

好，再加五百。五百加五百，等于……（停下来算。）

Chandler

Do you want a calculator?

要计算器吗？

Joey

Please!

要！

Chandler

Here! (Hands him one. Joey adds it up and discovers that he was right.)

给！（递过计算器，乔伊算完，发现自己算对了。）

Joey

All right, what else?

好了，还有呢？

Chandler

Well uh, there was acting classes, stage combat classes, tap classes…

表演课、舞台格斗课、踢踏舞课……

Joey

Which we're still keeping under our hats!

这事我们还瞒着别人呢！

Chandler

Uh then there was that dialect coach who helped you with that play where you needed a southern accent. Which after twenty hours of lessons still came out Jamaican.

还有方言老师，帮你练南部口音的戏。学了二十小时，结果说出来像牙买加口音。

Joey

What the hell are you talking about, (in a Jamaican accent) "The south will rise again man."

你胡说什么，（模仿牙买加口音）“南部会再次崛起的，兄弟。”

Chandler

Yes, money well spent!

钱花得真值！

Joey

Yeah. Okay, what else? Rent!

行。还有呢？房租！

Chandler

Okay, two, three years of rent, utilities, food…

两三年的房租、水电、伙食费……

Joey

Okay. Okay, so I'm writing you a check for…So you fell asleep during my movie. Big deal right? How do you clear this thing?

好。我给你开张支票……你看，你不就是看我电影睡着了吗？多大点事？这事儿就算了？

Ross

Come on, finish your enchilada.

快点，把墨西哥辣卷吃完。

Rachel

Ross I-We tried all the spicy food. It's not working.

罗斯，辣的我们都试过了，没用。

Ross

Okay here, have one of these peppers. Oh ha… Oh God! So…so hot! (Rubs his eyes.) Oh my-(Laughs.) By the way, you don't want to touch the pepper and then touch your eye.

那吃个辣椒。哈哈……天啊！好……好辣！（揉眼睛。）哎哟——（笑。）对了，别摸完辣椒揉眼睛。

Rachel

I am feeling nothing. Speaking of hot, watching you do that really makes me want to have sex with you.

我一点感觉都没有。说到辣，看你这样，我反倒想跟你同房了。

Ross

Stop it.

别闹。

Rachel

Oh come on Ross, why are we wasting our time with this other stuff?! We know what's gonna work! It's doctor recommended!

拜托，罗斯，别浪费时间试这些没用的了！我们知道什么有用！医生推荐的！

Ross

I'm sorry, but we have to have some boundaries! My God, I'm dying.

抱歉，但我们得有底线！天啊，我快辣死了。

Rachel

Oh come on Ross, we've done it before we'll do it again, it'll be a nice way to bookend the pregnancy.

别装了，罗斯，我们以前又不是没做过，再来一次，正好给怀孕画个圆满句号。

Ross

This is insane, I'm not gonna make love to you just so that you'll go into labor.

太离谱了，我才不会为了让你催产跟你同房。

Rachel

Make love? What are you a girl?

同房？你怎么跟个小姑娘似的？

Ross

Always a great way to get in a man's pants.

激将法对男人最管用了。

Rachel

But you will, you will be performing a service. Okay? Just-just think of me as a ketchup bottle, y'know you sometimes you have to bang on the end of it just to get something to come out.

你会做的，就当帮个忙。行吗？把我想象成番茄酱瓶子，有时候得敲几下底部，东西才会出来。

Ross

I love when you talk dirty to me.

我就喜欢你跟我说荤话。

Rachel

Oh, I know it. You're right. That's not sexy. Oh…Oh! (Drops a fork on the floor.) Whoops! Oh, I seem to have dropped my fork. Let me just bed over and get it. (Tries too, but can't quite seem to make it.) Oh God!

我知道。你说得对，一点都不性感。哦……哎呀！（叉子掉地上。）哎呀，叉子掉了。我弯腰捡一下。（试着弯腰，却做不到。）天啊！

Ross

Okay enough! This is, this is not going to happen.

够了！别来这套，没用。

Rachel

Come on Ross! I'm miserable here! Come on! You started this, now you finish it! Come on wuss, make love to me.

拜托，罗斯！我太难受了！快点！这事儿是你惹出来的，你得收尾！胆小鬼，跟我同房。

Ross

Y'know what?

你知道吗？

Rachel

What?!

什么？！

Ross

Forget it.

算了。

Rachel

Oh wow! What now Ross you're not gonna talk? How on earth will you ever annoy me? Oh wait a minute, I know. (Mimics his breathing.) I mean you'd think the damn jalepeno would've cleared up your sinuses, but no!! That's not enough… (Ross jumps over and kisses her.) What are you doing?!

哇！又怎么了？不说话了？你还怎么气我？哦，我知道了。（模仿他的呼吸声。）吃了那么多辣椒，鼻子还不通气，真够可以的……（罗斯突然扑过来吻她。）你干什么？！

Ross

I'm getting that baby out of you!

我要帮你把宝宝生出来！

(They kiss again.)

（两人再次亲吻。）

Rachel

(breaking the kiss) Oh God!

（推开他）天啊！

Ross

Oh, I know.

我知道。

Rachel

Oh no. No-no! I think my water just broke.

不好！不好！我羊水破了。

Ross

I am good. Okay! Okay! Uh, I got the pillow! I got the bag! You got the keys?

我可以的。好！好！我拿了枕头！拿了包！你带钥匙了吗？

Rachel

Okay! I got the keys! Okay! Okay!

带了！钥匙在这！好！好！

Ross

Hey!

嘿！

Rachel

Yeah.

嗯。

Ross

We're having a baby.

我们要有宝宝了。

(They hug and then kiss one more time.)

（两人拥抱，又吻了一下。）

Rachel

I didn't uh, really have time to read this part of the books, but do you think we have time to…

我看书没看到这部分，你说我们还有时间……

Ross

Not so much.

没多少了。

Rachel

Okay.

好。

Closing Credits

片尾字幕

Monica

Two hundred.

两百。

Phoebe

Thank you!

谢谢！

Monica

That's it. I'm done. I don't care when the baby comes, no more betting.

不赌了。我不在乎宝宝什么时候生，再也不赌了。

Phoebe

Okay.

好。

(The phone rings and Monica answers it.)

（电话响了，莫妮卡接起。）

Monica

Hello? (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) Uh-huh. (Listens) Okay. (Hangs up.) I guess we can bet one more time.

喂？（听电话）嗯。（听电话）嗯。（听电话）好。（挂电话。）看来还能再赌一次。

Phoebe

Is Rachel having the baby?

瑞秋生了？

Monica

How did you know that?! (Runs to yell at Joey's apartment.) Joey! Chandler!! It's time!

你怎么知道？！（跑去乔伊家喊。）乔伊！钱德！要生了！

Phoebe

They're at the coffeehouse.

他们在咖啡馆。

Monica

You know everything!! Oh wait, double or nothing. I bet you the baby is over seven pounds. (Phoebe isn't interested.) I bet you it has hair. (She's still not interested.) I bet you it's a girl.

你什么都知道！等等，翻倍赌，我赌宝宝超过七磅。（菲比没兴趣。）我赌有头发。（还是没兴趣。）我赌是女孩。

Phoebe

We know it’s a girl! (Exits.)

本来就是女孩！（离开。）

Monica

(following her) I’ll give you really good odds.

（跟着她）赔率很高的！

End

剧终