The One With The Stripper

Rachel

(coming from the bathroom) Hey Pheebs?

（从洗手间出来）嘿，菲比？

Phoebe

Huh?

嗯？

Rachel

I'm having dinner with my dad tomorrow night, do you wanna come?

我明晚和我爸一起吃晚餐，你要来吗？

Phoebe

Sure. Yeah, he's kinda sexy.

当然啦。他还挺有魅力的。

Rachel

Oh no, no, I'll be there too.

哦不行，我也会在场。

Phoebe

Okay so, we'll just come up with some kind of signal if it's going well you can take off.

那好吧，我们定个暗号，如果气氛不错，你就可以先走。

Rachel

No Phoebe! I just need you there for support. I haven't told him I'm pregnant yet.

不行菲比！我只是需要你在旁边支持我。我还没告诉他我怀孕了。

Phoebe

Oh. Why not?

哦。为什么不说？

Rachel

'Cause I know he's gonna flip out and I hate it when he's angry.

因为我知道他肯定会大发雷霆，我特别怕他生气。

Phoebe

Oh Rachel, this is all so 'Papa don't preach.'

哦瑞秋，这简直就是“爸爸别说教”。

Rachel

What Phoebe? Wait! One time he caught me smoking he said if he ever saw me doing that again he'd make me eat the entire pack.

什么菲比？对了！有一次他抓到我抽烟，说要是再看到我抽，就逼我把一整包烟都吃了。

Phoebe

Wow! Oh well, I will be there!

天呐！没事，我会陪你去的！

Rachel

Thank you.

谢谢你。

Phoebe

Gosh. I'm not gonna let that man make you eat your baby. (They both sit down by the rest of the gang and Phoebe recognizes a man by the window.) Oh. Hey! Who is that guy? I think I know him.

天呐。我绝不会让那个男人逼你“吃掉你的孩子”。（两人坐到朋友们身边，菲比认出窗边的一个男人。）哦。嘿！那个男人是谁？我好像认识他。

Monica

(recognizing him and panicking) No you don't!

（认出他后慌了神）你不认识！

Rachel

(panicking) No you don't.

（也慌了）你不认识。

Phoebe

Oh my God!!! Monica!! He's the stripper from your bachelorette party!!

我的天呐！！！莫妮卡！！他是你单身派对上的脱衣舞男！！

Chandler

Her what?!!

她的什么？！

Phoebe

Your secret bachelorette party…

你的秘密单身派对……

Chandler

You had a bachelorette party?!

你居然办了单身派对？！

Phoebe

She untied his G-string with her teeth. (Pause) Somebody stop me!

她用牙齿解开了他的丁字裤。（停顿）谁来拦住我！

Chandler

I thought we weren't gonna have bachelor/bachelorette parties! Y'know, we agreed that it was a silly tradition.

我还以为我们都不办单身派对了！我们都说好了这是个无聊的习俗。

Joey

It's a grand tradition!

这可是超棒的传统！

Monica

I'm sorry, they surprised me. There was nothing I could do!

对不起，他们突然给我办的，我没办法拒绝！

Rachel

Well you could've untied it with your hands.

那你也可以用手解开啊。

Joey

This is so unfair! The one thing I wanted to do was throw my best friend a bachelor party, but no, I wasn't allowed to. All I got was a stupid steak dinner!

太不公平了！我就想给我最好的朋友办个单身派对，结果还不让我办。最后就吃了顿破牛排晚餐！

Chandler

You went home with the waitress.

你最后跟女服务员回家了。

Joey

Oh yeah, that was a pretty good night.

对啊，那晚可爽了。

Chandler

I can't believe you didn't tell me! You know that the two pillars of marriage are openness and honesty!

你居然不告诉我！你知道婚姻的两大支柱是坦诚和真诚！

Monica

Ugh, I knew giving you that book was gonna come back and bite me in the ass!

唉，我就知道给你那本书，迟早要被你拿来说事！

Opening Credits

片头

Dr. Green

How about I order everyone the Moroccan chicken?

我给大家都点摩洛哥鸡肉怎么样？

Phoebe

Oh, I-I don't eat meat.

哦，我不吃肉。

Dr. Green

It's chicken.

这是鸡肉啊。

Phoebe

Yeah, I don't eat that either.

嗯，鸡肉我也不吃。

Dr. Green

I'll never understand you lesbians. (To Rachel) So baby, tell me…what is new with you.

我永远搞不懂你们这些女同性恋。（对瑞秋说）宝贝，跟我说说……你最近有什么事？

Rachel

Well actually umm…

其实呢……

Waiter

(interrupting) Your '74 Lafite sir.

（打断）先生，您的74年份拉菲红酒。

Dr. Green

'74?! I ordered the '75! That's a magnificent wine! The '74 is sewage! Why would you bring me sewage?! (The waiter's dumbfounded) Is that a hard question? Are you an idiot? Is that why you're a waiter?

74年？！我点的是75年的！那才是好酒！74年的就是泔水！你给我上泔水干嘛？！（服务员一脸懵）这很难理解吗？你是傻子吗？所以你才只能当服务员？

Waiter

This is why I told the manager I wouldn't wait on you tonight! (Runs off.)

所以我早就跟经理说今晚不伺候你了！（跑开。）

Dr. Green

Oh come on! Don't be such a baby! (Goes after him)

拜托！别这么矫情！（追了出去）

Rachel

(To Phoebe) In case you didn't notice, that is a scary man.

（对菲比说）你也看到了吧，他超吓人的。

Phoebe

He's right though, the '74 is absolute piss.

但他说得对，74年的酒确实难喝到爆。

Rachel

This was such a huge mistake. I can't tell him Phoebe. I can't, I can't, I can't, I can’t…

我来这就是个大错误。我不能告诉他菲比。我不能，不能，不能……

Phoebe

Rachel!

瑞秋！

Rachel

No it's okay, this is what's gonna happen. I'm gonna wait a couple years and then the baby will tell him.

没事，我想好了。我等几年，让孩子自己告诉他。

Phoebe

Why, so he can get mad at the baby?

干嘛？让他去跟孩子发火吗？

Rachel

Hey, that is the…baby's problem. (Dr. Green returns.) Oh, everything okay with the waiter?

那就是……孩子自己的事了。（格林医生回来。）哦，服务员那边没事吧？

Dr. Green

I have no idea, I went to the bathroom. So sweetie, you were starting to tell me what is uh, what is new with you.

不知道，我去洗手间了。宝贝，你刚才正要跟我说你最近的事吧。

Rachel

Well… Umm, I got TiVo.

嗯……我装了数字录像机。

Dr. Green

What's TiVo?

数字录像机是什么？

Phoebe

It's slang for pregnant.

是怀孕的黑话。

Rachel

Phoebe!

菲比！

Dr. Green

Are you really pregnant?

你真的怀孕了？

Rachel

Well uh, yes and no. Except not no. So to sum it up, yeah.

嗯，算是，也不算是。准确说就是算是。

Dr. Green

Who is the father? Oh no! Please don't tell me it's her! (Points at Phoebe.)

孩子爸爸是谁？别！千万别说是她！（指着菲比。）

Rachel

No, it's Ross. It's Ross. You like Ross. (He just shakes his head.) Oh daddy, I hope you're okay with all of this. I mean think about it, this is a good thing. You're gonna-This is your first grandchild! You're gonna be a poppy!

不是，是罗斯。是罗斯，你喜欢罗斯的。（他只是摇头。）爸爸，我希望你能接受这件事。你想想，这是好事啊。你要当外公了！这是你的第一个外孙！

Dr. Green

That's true.

倒也是。

Rachel

Yeah.

对吧。

Dr. Green

(laughs) Poppy. (To Phoebe) Oh, I'm gonna be a poppy. (Stops laughing) So when is the wedding?

（笑）外公。（对菲比说）我要当外公了。（笑容消失）婚礼什么时候办？

Rachel

Who?

什么婚礼？

Dr. Green

The wedding! There's going to be a wedding. Young lady, don't you sit there and tell me my first grandchild is going to be a bastard! (Rachel pauses) Rachel Karen Green, tell me there is gonna be a wedding!!

你们的婚礼！肯定要办婚礼的。姑娘，别跟我说我的第一个外孙是私生子！（瑞秋沉默）瑞秋·卡伦·格林，告诉我一定会办婚礼！！

Rachel

February 2nd!

2月2日！

(Dr. Green exhales in relief.)

（格林医生松了口气。）

Mona

So it was really cool seeing you lecture today.

今天听你讲课真的超棒。

Ross

Oh thanks. Although it kinda seemed like you were falling asleep there a little.

谢谢。不过我看你好像差点睡着了。

Mona

Oh no-no, I-I had my eyes closed so I could concentrate and y'know take it all in.

没有没有，我闭眼是为了集中注意力，把内容都听进去。

Ross

Yeah, a lot of my students do that.

对，我的很多学生都这样。

Mona

So, I gotta get going.

我得走了。

Ross

Okay, I-I'll see you tonight.

好，今晚见。

Mona

Yeah.

好。

Ross

Okay, bye.

好，拜拜。

(They kiss and she starts to leave.)

（两人亲吻后，莫娜准备离开。）

Mona

Oh hey, thanks again for showing me your semi-precious stone collection. It was amazing! (She leaves.)

哦对了，再谢谢你给我看你的半宝石收藏，太厉害了！（离开。）

Chandler

My God! You must be good in bed!

天呐！你床上功夫肯定很厉害！

Joey

So uh, you and Mona, been a while now. How's it going?

你和莫娜在一起有段时间了吧，进展怎么样？

Ross

Ah, it's good. It's going good. I mean, we get along great. She's, she's so…

挺好的，特别好。我们相处很融洽，她特别……

Joey

Hot?

性感？

Ross

Well, I was gonna say sweet, but yeah-huh!

我想说可爱，不过确实性感！

Chandler

She's okay with Rachel and the baby?

她知道瑞秋和孩子的事吗？

Ross

Well I…I haven't actually told her yet. I don't want to scare her off, y'know?

我还没跟她说，我怕把她吓跑。

Chandler

Well, you have to honest with her! Otherwise you may think that you're going down the same path, but you're really going down different ones.

你必须对她坦诚！不然你以为走的是同一条路，其实早就分道扬镳了。

Joey

I'm gonna take that book and beat you to death with it.

我要拿那本书拍死你。

Monica

(entering) Oh my God! You are gonna love me so much! I felt really bad about the whole bachelorette party thing, so tonight you're gonna have a bachelor party.

（走进来）天呐！你肯定超爱我！我一直为单身派对的事过意不去，所以今晚给你办个单身派对。

Chandler

What?

什么？

Monica

Yeah, I got this number from this guy at work and I hired a stripper to come dance for you. Am I going in the wife hall of fame or what?!

对，我从同事那要了号码，雇了个脱衣舞娘来给你跳舞。我是不是史上最佳妻子？

Chandler

Honey! That's crazy! I don't want you to get me a stripper…

亲爱的！别闹了！我不要什么脱衣舞娘……

Joey

Will you let the lady talk?!

让女士把话说完！

Monica

Come on! Come on, it'll be fun! It'll make me feel so much better.

来嘛！肯定很好玩！我心里也能好受点。

Chandler

Look, I appreciate it, but uh, it's a little creepy. Y'know? I'm not a bachelor anymore.

我谢谢你的心意，但有点奇怪吧？我已经不是单身了。

Monica

So don't think of it as a bachelor party, think of it as a…a two month anniversary present.

那就别当单身派对，就当……结婚两个月的纪念日礼物。

Ross

Sure, one year is paper, but two months is lapdance! (Joey nods his agreement.)

没错，一年是纸婚，两个月就是膝上舞！（乔伊点头赞同。）

Monica

Please! I feel so bad! Just watch the hot woman get naked!

求你了！我真的很愧疚！就看个辣妹跳脱衣舞而已！

Chandler

All right fine! But I'm only doing this for you!

好吧好吧！但我这都是为了你！

Joey

Yeah!

太好了！

Chandler

And Joey.

还有乔伊。

Monica

Thank you. All right, now who else do you want to invite?

谢谢你。那你还想邀请谁？

Chandler

Ah, no-no-no just Ross. Ross and Joey is embarrassing enough.

不用了，就罗斯吧。叫上罗斯和乔伊已经够尴尬了。

Ross

Uh actually, sorry I can't even make it. I'm seeing Mona again tonight.

不好意思，我来不了。今晚我要和莫娜约会。

Chandler

I understand: who would cancel an actual date to go to a fake bachelor party?

我懂，谁会为了假的单身派对，推掉真约会啊。

Joey

(on cell phone) I'm sorry I gotta cancel tonight baby…

（打电话）宝贝，抱歉今晚约会取消了……

Phoebe

I'm sorry I won't be able to make it to your imaginary wedding, but I'm really busy that day. Yeah, I already have a unicorn baptism and a leprechaun bar mitzvah.

抱歉，我参加不了你这场虚构的婚礼了，那天我很忙。我要去给独角兽洗礼，还要去参加小矮人的成人礼。

Rachel

I know. I know. I panicked, I panicked. I didn't want him to start yelling at me like I was some '74 Latour.

我知道，我当时慌了。我不想他对我大吼大叫，把我当成74年份的拉图红酒。

Phoebe

It's Lafite. The '74 Latour is actually drinking quite nicely.

是拉菲。74年份的拉图红酒其实挺好喝的。

Rachel

All right here he comes. I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna tell him, I'm gonna be strong.

他来了。我要说，我要告诉他，我要坚强点。

Dr. Green

I just called a friend of mine.

我刚给我朋友打了个电话。

Rachel

Yeah?

是吗？

Dr. Green

I think I may be able to book The Plaza on short notice.

我应该能临时订到广场酒店的场地。

Rachel

Really?! The Plaza?!! Oh daddy!! (Hugs him and Phoebe glares at her.) Right. Daddy, I need to talk to you. Please, sit down.

真的？！广场酒店？！爸爸！！（拥抱他，菲比瞪了她一眼。）爸爸，我有话跟你说，坐下吧。

Dr. Green

What is it sweetie?

怎么了宝贝？

Rachel

There's not gonna be a wedding. Ross and I are not getting married.

婚礼不办了。我和罗斯不会结婚。

Dr. Green

What?!

什么？！

Rachel

I'm sorry daddy.

对不起爸爸。

Dr. Green

I don't believe this!!

我不敢相信！！

Rachel

Oh now daddy, stay calm. Please.

爸爸，冷静点，求你了。

Dr. Green

Stay calm?!! How do you expect me to stay calm?! This is unacceptable Rachel! And I wanna know why?!! Is it because that punk Ross won't marry you?! That's it! Is that it?!

冷静？！我怎么冷静？！太不像话了瑞秋！我想知道原因！！是不是罗斯那混蛋不想娶你？！就是这样对不对？！

Rachel

Yes. Yes, he says I'm damaged goods.

对，他说我是残次品。

Joey

So you uh, nervous about getting married?

要结婚了，紧张吗？

Chandler

What are you doing?

你干嘛呢？

Joey

Look, look let's pretend it's a real bachelor party. Okay? Y'know? Before your wedding. Come on, it'll be fun.

我们假装这是真的单身派对好不好？婚前的那种，肯定很好玩。

Chandler

Okay. I can't believe tomorrow's the big day.

好吧。不敢相信明天就是大喜日子了。

Joey

How does it feel knowing you're never gonna be with another woman again huh? Knowing you're gonna have to wake up to the same face everyday until you finally have the sweet release of death.

想到以后再也不能和别的女人在一起，什么感觉？每天醒来都只能看到同一张脸，直到死才能解脱。

Chandler

You're right, this is more fun.

你说得对，这样确实好玩。

(There's a knock on the door.)

（有人敲门。）

Joey

That's her! Okay, come on! (They go over and open the door.)

肯定是她！走！（两人去开门。）

Stripper

Hi!

嗨！

Chandler

Hi. (Joey blows on a noisemaker.)

嗨。（乔伊吹响了哨子。）

Stripper

So which one of you lucky boys is Chandler?

哪个幸运儿是钱德？

Joey

Uh, that-that's-that's me!

呃，是我！

Chandler

That's me.

是我。

Joey

Joey Tribbiani, a big fan.

乔伊·崔比昂尼，超级粉丝。

Stripper

So is that a bedroom? (Points to the guestroom.)

那是卧室吗？（指着客房。）

Chandler

Yeah, yeah right over there.

对，就在那边。

Stripper

All right, whenever you're ready. (She goes into the bedroom.)

好，准备好了叫我。（走进卧室。）

Chandler

That was weird.

好奇怪。

Joey

Why-why would she go in the bedroom?

她干嘛去卧室？

Stripper

I'm waiting.

我等着呢。

(They both slowly enter the bedroom and quickly walk back out.)

（两人慢慢走进卧室，又飞快退了出来。）

Chandler

So she's a…

她原来是……

Joey

Yeah, that's one naked hooker!

对，是个裸着的妓女！

Mona

I love your place! Where is this guy from? (A statue from the top of his apothecary table.)

我喜欢你家！这个雕像从哪来的？（指着药柜桌上的雕像。）

Ross

Uh that's an eighteenth century Indian artifact from Calcutta.

是加尔各答18世纪的印度文物。

Mona

Oh wow! So, you're more than just dinosaurs.

哇！原来你不光研究恐龙啊。

Ross

So much more.

厉害的多着呢。

(They start making out and she kicks the eighteenth century Indian artifact from Calcutta off of his apothecary table from the days of yore and the magical city of White Plains.)

（两人开始亲热，莫娜不小心把那个18世纪印度文物从古老又神奇的白原市药柜桌上碰掉了。）

Mona

Oh my God! Oh my God! I'm so sorry!

天呐！对不起！

Ross

Aw forget it, it's from Pier One. (There's an angry knock on the door.) Sorry. (Goes and opens the door to an irate Dr. Green.)

没事，就是宜家买的。（传来急促的敲门声。）稍等。（开门，门外是怒气冲冲的格林医生。）

Dr. Green

You think you can knock up my daughter and then not marry her?! I'm gonna kill you!!

你以为搞大我女儿肚子，还不想娶她？！我要杀了你！！

Ross

Y'know this is actually not a great time for me.

你知道吗，我现在真的不方便。

Commercial Break

广告时段

Dr. Green

So? Come on! Explain yourself Geller! First you get my Rachel pregnant!

说啊！盖勒，你给我解释！你先搞大瑞秋的肚子！

Mona

You got Rachel pregnant?!

你让瑞秋怀孕了？！

Ross

Who did?!

谁？！

Dr. Green

You did!

你！

Ross

Yes. Yes, yes I did. (To Mona) But-but it was, it was just a one night thing. It meant nothing.

是，是我。（对莫娜说）但只是一夜情而已，什么都不算。

Dr. Green

Oh? Really? That's what my daughter means to you? Nothing?

是吗？我女儿对你来说什么都不是？

Ross

No! No sir umm, she means a lot to me. I mean, I care-I-I love Rachel.

不是！她对我很重要，我关心她，我爱她。

Mona

What?!

什么？！

Ross

(to Mona) Oh but not that way. I mean…I mean I'm not in love with her. I love her like a, like a friend.

（对莫娜说）不是那种爱，我不爱她，就是朋友之间的喜欢。

Dr. Green

Oh really? That's how treat a friend? You get her in trouble and then refuse to marry her?

是吗？对朋友就这么好？让她怀了孕，还不娶她？

Ross

(to Dr. Green) Hey! I offered to marry her!

（对格林医生说）我提过要娶她！

Mona

Wh…

什么……

Ross

(To Mona) But I didn't want to.

（对莫娜说）但我不想娶。

Dr. Green

Well why not? So you can spend your time with this tramp?!

那为什么？就为了跟这个女人鬼混？

Mona

Tramp?!

女人？！

Ross

I'm sorry. Dr. Green, Mona. Mona, Dr. Green.

抱歉。格林医生，这是莫娜。莫娜，这是格林医生。

Chandler

I can't believe there is a naked hooker in there!

不敢相信里面有个裸妓女！

Joey

Wait! Wait! Maybe she's a hooker and a stripper, but she got confused about what she's supposed to do.

等等！说不定她既是妓女也是脱衣舞娘，只是搞混了该做什么。

Chandler

Could be. I mean technically she did strip, we just, we just missed it. (Walks towards the bedroom.) Ma'am, are you also a stripper?

有可能。严格来说她确实脱了，只是我们没看到。（走向卧室。）女士，你也是脱衣舞娘吗？

Hooker

Uh, no. But I could pretend to strip, but that's gonna cost extra. Okay, here's the extras, handcuffs, spanking… (Chandler grunts for her not to continue and Joey pulls him back into the kitchen.)

不是。但我可以假装跳脱衣舞，不过要加钱。还有额外服务，手铐、打屁股……（钱德示意她别说了，乔伊把他拉回厨房。）

Joey

Maybe Monica's playing a joke on ya. Y'know? Getting her own husband a hooker, that's pretty funny.

说不定莫妮卡跟你开玩笑呢。给自己老公找妓女，挺搞笑的。

Chandler

That is funny, maybe for my birthday she'll murder someone.

是挺搞笑，说不定我生日她还会杀人呢。

Joey

I bet Ross was in on it too. I mean he was conveniently busy.

我打赌罗斯也知情，他刚好有事来不了。

Hooker

Do you mind if I smoke in here?

我可以在这抽烟吗？

Chandler

Oh actually, I'd rather you…Yeah, go ahead. We're gonna have to burn that room down anyway.

其实我不太想……算了，抽吧。反正那房间我们得烧了。

Mona

How could you have kept all of this from me?

你怎么能瞒着我这么多事？

Ross

I was going to tell you, but…

我本来要跟你说的，但是……

Dr. Green

But what?! You figured you'd get what you wanted and then dump her like you dumped Rachel!

但是什么？！你玩够了就甩了她，就像甩瑞秋一样！

Ross

Hey! I did not dump Rachel! (To Mona) Nor are we still together. (The phone rings and Ross goes to answer it, only he's trapped behind the apothecary table by Dr. Green.) Can I just… (Dr. Green glares at him.) Why don't we just let the machine get that?

我没有甩瑞秋！（对莫娜说）我们现在也没在一起。（电话响了，罗斯想去接，却被格林医生堵在药柜桌后。）我能……（格林医生瞪着他。）要不让答录机接吧？

Joey

(on machine) Hey Ross. It's Joey. There's a hooker over here and we thought maybe you'd know something about it.

（留言）嘿罗斯，我是乔伊。我们这有个妓女，觉得你可能知道点什么。

Ross

No! No! No! No! No! I-I-I-I-I need to, I need to lie down.

不是！不是！我要晕了。

Stu

So, tonight's the night of the big bachelor party?

今晚要办单身派对？

Monica

Yeah! Hey! Thanks for getting me that girl's number.

对！谢谢你给我那个女孩的号码。

Stu

No problem. So who's the party for?

不客气。给谁办的派对？

Monica

My husband.

我老公。

Stu

You hired your husband a hooker?

你给你老公雇了个妓女？

Monica

She's a stripper.

她是脱衣舞娘。

Stu

No, she's a hooker.

不，她就是妓女。

Monica

Is that, is that what they call strippers sometimes?

脱衣舞娘有时候也这么叫吗？

Stu

When they're hookers.

只有她们是妓女的时候才这么叫。

Monica

Oh my God Stu! I-I can't believe you did this! Now are you absolutely sure she's a hooker?

天呐斯图！你居然这么坑我！你确定她是妓女？

Stu

Either that or she's just the best, most expensive date I ever had.

要么就是妓女，要么就是我约过最棒、最贵的约会对象。

(Monica runs out.)

（莫妮卡跑了出去。）

Joey

Maybe she meant to get you a hooker.

说不定她就是故意给你找妓女的。

Chandler

Why would she do that?

她为什么要这么做？

Joey

Maybe she wants you to learn something. Huh? Now is there anything you're really bad at y'know, sexually?

说不定想让你学点东西。你床上功夫是不是很差？

Chandler

This is the worst bachelor party ever!

这是史上最烂的单身派对！

Hooker

What's taking you boys so long?

你们俩磨蹭什么呢？

Joey

In a minute!

马上！

Chandler

(To Joey) In a minute? What's gonna happen in a minute?!

（对乔伊说）马上？马上能干嘛？

Joey

All right, all right maybe-maybe you should just ask her to leave.

好吧，你让她走就行了。

Chandler

Why me?!

为什么是我？！

Joey

Hey! It's your bachelor party.

这是你的单身派对。

Chandler

Which is why you should do it.

所以才该你去说。

Joey

I don't want to. You do it!

我不想，你去！

Chandler

You do it!

你去！

Chandler

All right Rock, Paper, Scissors who has to tell the whore to leave! (Joey smirks.) What?

好吧，石头剪刀布，谁输谁去让她走！（乔伊坏笑。）笑什么？

Joey

I miss this.

我怀念这个了。

Chandler

I don't think we've actually done this before!

我们以前好像没玩过！

Joey

No, I-I miss hanging out with you.

不是，我怀念跟你一起玩的日子。

Chandler

Well we…we still hang out.

我们现在也一起玩啊。

Joey

Not like we used to. Remember? You and me used to be inseparable. Y'know now it's like…things are different.

不一样了。以前我们形影不离，现在……一切都变了。

Chandler

Well y'know, things are different. I'm…I'm married now.

是啊，我结婚了。

Joey

Oh sure-And hey, don't get me wrong, I am so happy for you guys. I just…I miss…hanging out…just-just us, y'know?

我懂，我真心为你们高兴。我就是怀念……只有我们俩的日子。

Chandler

Yeah, I miss that too. I tell you what; from now on we'll make time to hang out with each other.

我也怀念。这样吧，以后我们专门抽时间一起玩。

Joey

You got it. Come here. (They hug and are observed by the hooker.)

一言为定。过来。（两人拥抱，妓女看着他们。）

Hooker

Oh God! Listen, I am this close to robbing you guys. (Does the close sign.)

天呐！我差点就抢你们了。（比划了个很近的手势。）

Monica

(entering quickly) She's a hooker! She's a hooker! She's a… (Stops as she sees her.) Hi! Uh, we spoke on the phone. (Goes and shakes the hooker's hand.)

（匆忙进来）她是妓女！她是妓女！她……（看到妓女后停下。）嗨！我们通过电话。（上前和妓女握手。）

Ross

So your dad dropped by. He's a pleasant man!

你爸爸刚来找过我，人真随和！

Rachel

(quietly) Oh no…

（小声说）完了……

Phoebe

I'd better go. (She goes and sits down in the La-Z-Boy E-cliner 3000, the chair that Sit magazine called chair of the year, and they both look at her.) Just over here: I don't want to miss the fight.

我还是走吧。（坐到那把《家居》杂志年度最佳的躺椅上，两人看着她。）我就在这，不想错过你们吵架。

Rachel

Ross I'm so sorry. Okay. I-I will promise I will straighten this out with him tomorrow in person, or via e-mail.

罗斯对不起。我保证明天亲自跟他说清楚，或者发邮件说。

Ross

I don't care about your dad! I care about Mona! She was there and now she's totally freaked out!

我不管你爸爸！我在乎莫娜！她当时在场，现在彻底懵了！

Rachel

Oh okay, I'll fix that to. What's her e-mail address?

好，我也搞定她。她邮箱多少？

Ross

Rachel!

瑞秋！

Rachel

All right, I promise. I'll fix this. I swear. I'll-I'll-I'll-I'll talk to her.

我保证，我会搞定的，我跟她谈。

Ross

Okay!

好！

Rachel

Okay.

好。

Ross

Thank you!

谢谢你！

Phoebe

That's it?! You call that a fight? Come on! "We were on a break!" "No we weren't!" What happened to you two?!

就这样？这也叫吵架？以前不是还吵“我们分手了”“没有”吗？你们俩怎么了？

Ross

Thank you so much for coming back over.

谢谢你愿意回来。

Mona

Oh good, you're here. Yeah, and I was worried that it was going to be uncomfortable.

太好了，你在。我还担心会很尴尬。

Rachel

I know Mona, just hear me out. First of all, I'm so sorry about my father yelling at you, but I heard you totally held your own. You're gonna have to tell me how you did that.

莫娜，听我说。首先，我为我爸爸对你大吼大叫道歉，不过听说你一点都没怂，教教我。

Ross

Focus.

说正事。

Rachel

Okay. Um…But-Okay, yes Ross and I used to date. And yes we are gonna have a baby. But we are definitely not getting back together.

好。罗斯和我以前确实交往过，也确实要一起养孩子，但我们绝对不会复合。

Mona

How can I be sure on that?

我怎么相信？

Rachel

Oh we just-we drove each other crazy!

我们在一起简直要疯了！

Ross

Yeah.

对。

Rachel

I mean he was possessive, he was jealous, he could never just let the little things go!

他占有欲强、爱吃醋，一点小事都揪着不放！

Ross

Trying to date this woman.

我还得跟你约会呢。

Rachel

Right! But, none of that compared to how kind and-and how gentle and thoughtful he is. (Rubbing his shoulder.)

但这些都比不上他温柔体贴、善解人意。（拍了拍罗斯的肩膀。）

Ross

Probably shouldn't touch me.

别碰我。

Mona

Y'know, I-I-I just…I don't want to get in the middle of something so complicated.

我不想卷入这么复杂的关系里。

Rachel

I know, I get it, but Mona, what relationship is not complicated? I mean we all have our baggage! You must too! Why else would you still be single? (Mona looks at her.) I am so gonna leave right now. (Ross opens the door for her and she leaves.)

我懂，但莫娜，哪段关系不复杂？我们都有过去，你肯定也有，不然怎么还单身？（莫娜看着她。）我现在就走。（罗斯开门，瑞秋离开。）

Ross

Should I leave this open for you too?

要不要我也给你留门？

Mona

I'm not sure yet. Why didn't you just tell me about all this?

我还不确定。你为什么不早告诉我？

Ross

Because what's going on with Rachel has nothing to do with how I feel about you.

因为瑞秋的事，和我对你的感觉没关系。

Mona

Yeah? Well you still shoulda told me.

是吗？但你还是该告诉我。

Ross

I know and I was going to, but I thought it was better that you heard it from Rachel's father. Look I…I made a mistake, but it's only because I really, really like you. Really!

我知道，我本来要告诉你的，只是觉得从瑞秋爸爸那听到更合适。我错了，都是因为我真的、真的很喜欢你。

Mona

Okay, I guess you can…close the door now. (He does so and they kiss.)

好吧，你可以关门了。（罗斯关门，两人亲吻。）

Rachel

(entering) Forgot my purse! (Sees them kissing.) Oh, you guys made up. (To Mona) He's a good kisser isn't he? (Ross goes to close the door on her.) I'm going! (Quickly leaves and Ross locks the door.)

（进来）忘拿包了！（看到两人亲吻。）哦，和好了。（对莫娜说）他接吻超厉害的吧？（罗斯把她往外赶。）我走了！（快速离开，罗斯锁门。）

Monica

I swear I didn't know she was a hooker! I mean wh-Did you let her smoke in here?

我发誓我不知道她是妓女！你居然让她在这抽烟？

Chandler

Her ass print is still on your grandmother's quilt, do you really want to talk about smoking?

她的屁股印还在你奶奶的被子上呢，你还好意思说抽烟？

Monica

Y'know what? I'm gonna make this up to you. I promised you a stripper (turns on the radio), and you're gonna get a stripper. (She starts to strip.)

我补偿你。我答应给你找脱衣舞娘，（打开收音机）现在就给你跳。（开始脱衣服。）

Chandler

Monica! Wait!

莫妮卡！等等！

Monica

What?

怎么了？

Chandler

(puts on his crown) Carry on.

（戴上皇冠）继续。

(She does so by taking off her jacket seductively, only she has trouble getting one hand out and slams the jacket on the chair angrily to remove it.)

（莫妮卡妖娆地脱外套，结果一只手卡住，生气地把外套甩到椅子上。）

Monica

Ooh, these tennis shoes are so tight. I think I'll take them off. (Goes to do so.)

这运动鞋太紧了，我脱了吧。（准备脱鞋。）

Chandler

Could you not narrate?

别边脱边说行不行？

Monica

Gotcha sailor. (Kicks one of her shoes off and it lands in the kitchen knocking something down, but she continues to strip.)

收到，水手。（踢掉一只鞋，鞋子飞到厨房碰倒了东西，莫妮卡继续脱。）

Closing Credits

片尾

Dr. Green

(on phone) …just because you're not in love with the guy you can't…

（电话里）……就因为你不爱他，你就不能……

Phoebe

(entering, quietly) Wow, you told your dad the truth.

（悄悄走进来）哇，你跟你爸说实话了。

Rachel

About an hour ago.

一小时前说的。

Phoebe

Wanna go see a movie?

去看电影吗？

Rachel

Yes! (She gets up and sets the phone on the counter without hanging it up.) Bye daddy. (Phoebe and her leave.)

好！（起身把电话放在吧台上，没挂。）拜拜爸爸。（和菲比离开。）

Dr. Green

(on phone, not hearing her) …there's gonna be a wedding! (Joey enters from his room and goes to get a beer from the fridge.) That's unacceptable Rachel! What the hell does love have to do with it anyway?! There are more important things in a marriage other than love! (Joey hears something and looks around for the source.) …constantly thinking about things! You have to think about the consequences of your decision. (Joey finds that the sound is coming from the phone and puts it to his ear.)

（没听见）……婚礼必须办！（乔伊从房间出来，去冰箱拿啤酒。）太不像话了瑞秋！爱情算什么！婚姻里比爱情重要的事多了去了！（乔伊听到声音，四处找来源。）……凡事要三思！要考虑后果！（乔伊发现声音来自电话，拿起贴在耳边。）

Joey

(on phone) Hey! I do too think about the consequences of my decisions! (Listens) What gives you the right to… (Listens) Go to hell! (Hangs up the phone and opens the fridge.) Stupid guy on my phone.

（电话里）我当然会考虑后果！（听电话）你凭什么……（听电话）去死吧！（挂电话，打开冰箱。）谁啊，乱打电话。

End

结束