The One With The Engagement Picture

Chandler

Hey.

嗨。

Monica

What's the matter?

怎么了？

Chandler

Someone on the subway licked my neck! Licked my neck!!

有人在地铁舔我的脖子！舔我的脖子！！

Phoebe

Oh Willie's still alive!

喔，伟利冤魂不散！

Chandler

What are you guys doing?

你们做什么呢？

Monica

Oh, my mom called, they're gonna run our engagement announcement in the local paper, so we're looking for a good picture of us.

喔，我妈说要在本地报纸登订婚启示，所以要找张拍得好的照片。

Chandler

Oooh, I'm afraid that does not exist.

Oooh，恐怕应该没有。

Monica

That's not true, there are great pictures of us!

不对，我们拍过很多好照片！

Chandler

No, there are great pictures of you standing next to a guy who's going like this... (Makes what can only be described as a toothy frown. Henceforth, this shall be known as The Face.)

你那些好照片，旁边的人都是这样的……（做出只能被描述为咧嘴皱眉的表情。此后，这被称为“那张脸”。）

Phoebe

Oh my God! That's the creep that you're with at the Statue of Liberty.

我的天啊！真让人感到恐怖。

Chandler

I don't know what it is, I just can't take a good picture.

我不知道为什么不能拍张好照片。

Monica

(looking at one) Oh, here's a great one.

（看着一张）哦，这张蛮好的。

Chandler

Yeah, I'm not in that.

哦，我不在照片里。

Monica

I know, but look at me all tan.

我知道，但你看我晒的多黑。

Phoebe

Hey, why don't you guys go, get portraits done by a professional photographer.

嘿，你们不如找专业摄影师拍照。

Monica

That's a good idea! I bet they have one of those wind machines! Y'know... (Does the whole hair blowing in the wind model type poses.)

好主意！他们一定有吹风机！（做出头发在风中飞舞的模特姿势。）

Phoebe

Yeah that's great! Next to that, Chandler won't look so stupid.

对，好极了！那样钱德会显得不那么笨。

Monica

Chandler what do you say?

钱德，你怎么想？

Chandler

All right, but I should warn you, I'm not going. I'm going. (Does The Face while saying that last part.)

好的，但我先声明，我不会去。我会去。（说最后一句时做了“那张脸”。）

Opening Credits

片头

Ross

(To Chandler) Dude, that reverse lay-up! Oh...

（对钱德）那个反手上篮！哇喔……

Chandler

How about those three pointers?

那些三分球怎么样？

Ross

Amazing!

一流！

Chandler

And those guys were this (Doing the standard "This Close" gesture) close to lettin' us play this time too.

那些家伙几乎让我们赢球。

(They both get dejected and go sit down.)

（两人都沮丧地坐下。）

Rachel

Hey look-look, Phoebe's talking to uh, Cute Coffeehouse Guy.

嘿，看，菲比在跟咖啡店帅哥聊天。

Ross

Oh, you guys call him Cute Coffeehouse Guy, we call him Hums While He Pees.

喔，你们叫他咖啡店帅哥，我们叫他“尿时嗯嗯声”。

Chandler

Yes, and we call Ross Lingers In The Bathroom.

对，我们叫罗斯为厕所所长。

Phoebe

(returning) Hey you guys, Hums While He Pees just asked me out!

（回来）嗨，“尿时嗯嗯声”约我去逛街了！

Rachel

Hey, I thought that guy was married.

我以为那个家伙已经结婚了。

Phoebe

He is! But he's getting divorced---Ross! Maybe you know him.

对啊！但他准备离婚了——罗斯！也许你认识他。

Ross

It's not a club.

不是俱乐部。

Rachel

Phoebe, if this guy's going through a divorce, is it such a good idea to start going out with him?

菲比，他就要离婚了，你觉得跟他约会合适吗？

Ross

Hey, divorced men are not bad men!

嗨，离婚的男人不是坏男人！

Chandler

They have that on the napkins at the club.

你们可以在离婚俱乐部的餐巾上印上这句话。

Rachel

Oh, I gotta get back to work.

喔，我要回去工作了。

Phoebe

You don't have to be back for a half-hour!

还有半小时呢！

Rachel

Yeah but, my assistant Tag does sit-ups in the office during lunch. Ohh! I could just spread him on a cracker.

但是我的助手Tag要在午餐时间做仰卧起坐。喔！我恨不能吃了他！

Chandler

Rach, if you have a crush on this guy, why would you hire him? I mean y'know you can't date him right?

瑞秋，你既然暗恋他，为什么还要雇他？我想你知道你不能跟他约会，对吗？

Rachel

Oh no, I know that. I know that. Although, we made a joke that we spend so much time together he should call me his work wife.

喔，我很清楚。我们曾开玩笑说在一起这么长时间，他可以称我为“工作老婆”了。

Ross

Soon he'll be able to call you, that lady he knew who got fired.

他迟些时候会叫你“被炒鱿鱼的女人”。

Rachel

I am not gonna get fired, because I'm not gonna act on it.

我不会，因为我不会付诸行动。

Phoebe

So you wouldn't mind if he was dating someone else?

你不介意他跟别的女人约会？

Rachel

Why? Is he? He is! Isn't he? He's dating that slut in marketing!

为什么？他有啊！他跟市场部的女人约会！

Ross

Maybe I should open a divorced men's club.

也许我该开个离婚俱乐部。

Chandler

Dude that is so sad.

太可怜了。

Ross

I could put uh-uh a basketball court in the back.

我可以在后边建一个篮球场。

Chandler

Could I play?

我可以一起打吗？

Rachel

Oh, no sit-ups today Tag?

喔，今天没做仰卧起坐吗？

Tag

I just did them.

Tag：刚做完。

Rachel

Oh, well drop and give me ten more!

喔，马上再做十个！

Tag

What?

Tag：什么？

Rachel

Uh, I-I had a drink with lunch. Did those cost reports come in?

我-我午饭时喝了点酒。花费报告填完了吗？

Tag

Yeah, I filled them out last night?

Tag：是的，我昨晚填好了。

Rachel

Oh, great could you make me four copies of those?

喔，太好了，帮我影印四份好吗？

(He gets up to make the copies leaving Rachel alone with his stuff. She notices his sweater in his backpack and holds it up to her nose as Melissa, a coworker, walks up.)

（他起身去复印，留下瑞秋一个人和他的东西。她注意到他背包里的毛衣，拿起来放到鼻子边，这时同事Melissa走过来。）

Melissa

Hey Rachel!

Melissa：嘿，瑞秋！

Rachel

(startled) Ahh, hi! Hi! Melissa, what's up? I'm just uh, about to umm, go out to the store to get some stuff to put in my backpack. Y'know, like dried fruit and granola and stuff. What's up? (She has put on the backpack.)

（ startled）啊，嗨！嗨！Melissa，什么事？我只是呃，要去商店买些东西放进我的背包里。就是一些水果干、麦片之类的东西。有什么事吗？（她已经背上了背包。）

Melissa

Umm, is Tag here?

Melissa：嗯，Tag在吗？

Rachel

No. Why?

不在。什么事？

Melissa

Oh, I was gonna talk to him about doing something tonight.

Melissa：哦，我今天晚上想约他。

Rachel

Really?! Got a little crush on Tag there do ya?

真的？！你跟他有点意思？！

Melissa

Well, we've been flirting back and forth, but I was hoping that tonight it would turn into something a little more than that.

Melissa：我们经常眉来眼去，但我希望今天晚上能有更实质的进展。

Rachel

Okay, whoa-whoa easy there Melissa! This ain't a locker room, okay? But, y'know I remember him saying that-that he had plans tonight.

别着急，Melissa，这里是办公室，好吗？但是，我想起他说今天晚上有事了。

Melissa

Oh no!

Melissa：喔，不会吧！

Rachel

Oh yeah. All right, back to work.

哦，真的。好了，回去工作。

Melissa

Hey! Isn't that Tag's backpack.

Melissa：嘿！这不是Tag的书包吗？

Rachel

Yeah Melissa, I don't want to be known as the uh, office bitch, but I will call your supervisor.

是啊Melissa，我不想得罪人，但是我会叫你的主管的。

(Melissa beats a hasty retreat.)

（Melissa匆忙离开。）

The Photographer

(taking pictures) Great! That's great Monica! Great! Now, Chandler, you want to give us a smile?

（拍照）好极了，莫妮卡，好极了！现在，钱德，你能笑一下吗？

Chandler

Okay. (Does The Face.)

好。（做“那张脸”。）

The Photographer

I'm sorry, is the seat uncomfortable?

对不起，你坐的不舒服吗？

Chandler

No, I am.

不，是我不舒服。

Monica

Chandler, listen to me sweetie, I know you can do this. Okay? You have a beautiful smile.

钱德，听我说，你行的。你的笑容很美丽。

Chandler

I do? (He smiles, beautifully.)

真的？（他笑了，笑得很美。）

Monica

Yeah! (They turn to the camera, and Chandler does The Face again.) All right, maybe you don't have to smile. Let's try something else. Let's try umm, try looking sexy.

对啊！（他们转向镜头，钱德又做了“那张脸”。）好了，也许你不用笑。我们试试其他的。试试……扮性感。

Chandler

Okay. (You'll have to see it, I can't describe the face he makes, but it isn't good.)

好。（你得亲眼看看，我无法描述他做的表情，反正不好看。）

Monica

Or not.

还是不要了。

Rachel

Hi Joey! What are you doing here?

嗨，乔！你怎么到这来了？

Joey

Uhh, well I've got an audition down the street and I spilled sauce all over the front of my shirt. (Removes his hand to reveal a huge sauce stain.) You got an extra one?

呃，我在附近试镜，不小心把衣服弄脏了。（拿开手，露出一个大酱汁污渍。）你这有吗？

Rachel

Yeah, sure. Umm...here. (Hands him one.)

当然有。嗯……这里。（递给他一件。）

Joey

Great. (He doesn't like it.) You got anything that's not Ralph Lauren?

好。（他不喜欢。）有不是这个牌子的吗？

Rachel

Yeah, I don't think so Joe.

应该没，乔。

Joey

All right, I guess this will be fine.

好吧，那就这件吧。

Rachel

Hey, listen umm, what-what are you doing tonight?

嗨，今晚有事吗？

Joey

Nothing, why?

没有，什么事？

Rachel

How would you feel about taking out my assistant Tag? I'll pay.

想带我的助手Tag出去吗？我付帐。

Joey

Huh, Rach I got to say it's gonna take a lot of money for me to go out on a date with a dude.

让我跟男孩约会要很多钱。

Rachel

I'm not asking you to go on a date with him!

我不是请你跟他约会。

Joey

Really? 'Cause I could kinda use the money.

真的？我急用钱。

Rachel

Joey, just-just he-he's new in town and I know he doesn't have any guy friends. Just take him to like a ball game or something. I'll really appreciate it.

乔，他来纽约不久，我知道他没有多少男性朋友。你带他去看看球赛之类的，我会感激不尽的。

Joey

Yeah, okay.

好吧，没问题。

Rachel

Yeah?

喔～甜麦圈。

Joey

Sure, no problem. (Sees something.) Ooh---Hey, donuts!

没问题。（看见什么）哦——嘿，甜麦圈！

Rachel

Yeah!

对！

Joey

Okay. (He grabs a jelly donut, takes a bite, and guess what he spills all over himself. He tries to clean it up and smears it all over the shirt.)

好。（他抓起一个果冻甜麦圈，咬了一口，猜怎么着，他又弄了自己一身。他试图清理，结果把衬衫上抹得到处都是。）

Monica

I know. Let's try a look...of far off...wonderment. Okay, we'll-we'll gaze into our future and we'll think about our marriage and the days to come.

我想到了，我们试着向远处望。我们想想未来，想想结婚后的生活。

(Chandler is still not getting it.)

（钱德还是没领会。）

Monica

Chandler! What is the matter with your face?! I mean this picture is supposed to say "Geller and Bing to be married," not "Local woman saves drowning moron!" (The photographer laughs.) Hey! Don't laugh at him! He's my drowning moron!

钱德，你的脸到底怎么了？这张相片应该是说“盖勒和宾要结婚了”，不是“本地女人拯救溺水笨蛋”！（摄影师笑）嘿！不要笑他！他是我的溺水笨蛋！

Chandler

Aww! (Smiles.)

呵呵！（微笑。）

Monica

That's it! Take it! Take it! Take it!

就是这样，快照，快照，快照！

(Chandler turns to the camera and does The Face.)

（钱德转向镜头，做了“那张脸”。）

Ross

I like this one. (Points to it.) It seems to say, "I love you and that's why I have to kill you."

我喜欢这一张。好像是说“爱你爱到杀死你”。

Monica

They can't all be bad. (To Chandler) Find the one where you make your bedroom eyes. Ohh, there it is.

不可能都不行的。（对钱德）找那张你眼睛像刚睡醒似的。噢，就是这样。

Chandler

Oh my God! Those are my bedroom eyes?! Why did you ever sleep with me?

上帝啊！我刚睡醒时的眼睛就这样？你怎么敢跟我睡觉？

Monica

Do you really want to pull at that thread?

你真的想我说出来吗？

(Phoebe enters with Hums While He Pees also known as Kyle.)

（菲比和“尿时嗯嗯声”又名Kyle进来。）

Phoebe

I'm having a really good time!

我现在很开心！

Kyle

Me too! I'm sorry that guy in the subway licked your neck.

Kyle：我也是！我很抱歉在地铁里那个男人舔了你的脖子。

Phoebe

Ohh. No that's okay, he's a friend.

喔，没关系，他是我的朋友。

Kyle

Hey uh, I don't mean to be presumptuous but I have these two tickets to the ballroom dancing finals tomorrow night if you want to go?

Kyle：嗨，我知道这样有点急，但是我有两张明天晚上舞蹈决赛的门票，一起去好吗？

Phoebe

Yeah, I... Well y'know I-I mean I missed the-the semi-finals, so I'd just be lost.

好的，我已经错过了半决赛，我还以为连决赛也会错过。

Kyle

I know it's really lame, but I got these tickets from my boss and---Oh no! No! No! My God!

Kyle：我知道这没多大说服力，但门票是我老板给的——噢，不，不，我的上帝！

Phoebe

Okay, don't freak out. I'll go.

别惊慌，我会去的。

Kyle

No it's... Uh, my ex-wife Whitney is out there. I cannot deal with her right now. That woman is crazy!

Kyle：不，我……呃，我的前妻Whitney在外边，我不想见她。她是个疯女人。

Phoebe

Okay, I know. Hold on. (She walks over to the couch.) Hey Ross?

好的，我知道了。等一下。（她走到沙发旁）嘿，罗斯。

Ross

Yeah?

什么事？

Phoebe

Yeah, umm that's Whitney (Points), Kyle's ex-wife out there, now do you think that you can y'know divert her so that we can slip out?

Kyle的前妻Whitney在门口，你现在可以转移她的视线，让我们逃走吗？

Ross

What?! No!

什么？！不！

Phoebe

Well okay but I have two tickets to the ballroom dance finals. (She holds up the tickets that Kyle gave her.)

好吧，但是我有两张舞蹈决赛的门票。（举起Kyle给她的票。）

Ross

Look, I don't think so Pheebs. (Pause) All right, I'll do it. But just because you're a friend. (Grabs the tickets and heads to divert Whitney.)

我不这么想，菲比……（停顿）好吧，我帮你就是了。但只是看在朋友的面上。（抓过票，去转移Whitney的注意力。）

Phoebe

Hi Ginger.

嗨。

Ross

All right! I want my key back!

好的！我要回我的钥匙！

Phoebe

I don't have it!

我没有！

Ross

It's right there! (Points to her hand.)

就在这里！（指着她的手。）

Phoebe

Ugh, okay Sherlock! (Hands over the key.)

噢～！好吧，侦探。（交出钥匙。）

Ross

Look, I'm sorry but you-you-you better go Pheebs.

不好意思，你快走吧，菲比。

Phoebe

All right, well I just wanted to say thank you though for diverting Kyle's ex.

好吧，我只是来感谢你帮我引开Kyle前妻的注意。

Ross

Oh yeah---No---You're welcome. We'll talk about it later.

不用客气，我们下次再说。

Phoebe

Okay.

好的。

(Ross opens the door to reveal Whitney standing there.)

（罗斯打开门，Whitney站在那里。）

Ross

Hi Whitney.

嗨，Whitney。

Whitney

Hi Ross! You ready for breakfast?

Whitney：嗨，罗斯！准备好去吃早饭了吗？

Ross

Yep. (Phoebe slams the door shut.) Okay.

是的。（菲比把门砰地关上。）好。

Phoebe

(To Ross) Kyle's ex-wife? You were supposed to divert her not date her!

（对罗斯）Kyle的前妻？我叫你引开她的注意，不是让你跟她约会！

Ross

(opens the door and to Whitney) Hi! I'm sorry, but can you give me a second while I talk to this woman, who by the way did not spend the night.

（开门对Whitney）嗨！对不起，可以给我点时间跟这个女人谈一下吗？还有，她没有在这里留宿。

Whitney

Sure.

Whitney：没问题。

Ross

Okay. (Closes the door.) (To Phoebe) I did divert her and we ended up having a great time! Okay?

好。（关上门）（对菲比）我引开她的注意，但是我们在一起很开心，ok？一起看舞蹈决赛？

Phoebe

Watching ballroom dancing?

一起看舞蹈决赛？

Ross

Yes! That's where we realized we were both super cool people!

是的！我们发现我们兴趣相投！

Phoebe

Well look-look, okay Ross, Kyle just told me some really bad stuff about her.

好的，罗斯，Kyle告诉我了她很多坏毛病。

Ross

Like what?

例如？

Phoebe

Like she's really mean, and she's over critical, and-and---No! She will paint a room a really bright color without even checking with you!

例如，她很小气，吹毛求疵。还有，她没经过你同意，就把你的房间染成其他颜色。

Ross

Okay.

好。

Phoebe

And! She uses sex as a weapon!

还有，她用性来做武器。

Ross

Fine! Thank you for warning me. At breakfast I'll be on full alert for room painting and sex weapons.

好的！谢谢你的忠告。一会我会警惕房间的颜色还有性武器。

Phoebe

You're still gonna go out with her?!

你还是跟她出去？

Ross

Yeah!

对！

Phoebe

Well, didn't you just hear what I said?!

你没听到我说的吗？！

Ross

Pheebs come on! I mean, consider the source! Of course her ex-husband's gonna say that stuff. Now, if you'll excuse me...

菲比，谁跟你这样说的！她的前夫当然这样说她了。现在，我失陪了……

Phoebe

(interrupting him) No listen to me! She is crazy!

（打断他）听我说，她是疯子！

Whitney

(outside the door) Uh, your door isn't sound proof.

Whitney：（门外）嗨，你的门不隔音。

Phoebe

You see? Nothing is good enough for her!

看，她还在挑三捡四。

Tag

Good morning.

Tag：早上好。

Rachel

Hi Tag! Hey, so did you have fun with uh, with Joey last night?

嗨，Tag！昨天晚上跟乔玩的开心吗？

Tag

Oh yeah! We went to the Knicks game.

Tag：是啊，我们一起去看篮球赛。

Rachel

Ohh that's nice.

喔，好极了。

Tag

Then we went to this bar and he hooked us up with all these women!

Tag：然后我们去酒吧，他带我泡女人！

Rachel

Wo-women? You mean like old women?

女人？你是说老女人？

Tag

Well kinda old, like 30.

Tag：有点老，30多岁吧。

Rachel

(Pause) Oh.

（停顿）噢。

Tag

And I never used to be able to just talk to girls in bars, but I got like 20 phone numbers last night.

Tag：以前我不会在酒吧跟女孩聊天，但是我昨天晚上大概拿到了20个电话。

Rachel

That's great! Wow man, so Joey must've really taught you some stuff huh?

太棒了！乔肯定教了你几招吧？嗯？

Tag

A little.

Tag：一点点啦。

Rachel

Yeah?

是吗？

(A beautiful women walks up.)

（一个漂亮女人走过来。）

Tag

(To her, in the Joey voice) How you doin'?

Tag：（对她，用乔伊的声音）你好吗？

Commercial Break

广告时间

Joey

See? That's a great smile! Easy. Natural. Now, pretend I have a camera. (Chandler immediately does The Face.) You're changing it!

看？多好的微笑！自然点。现在，假装这里有部相机。（钱德立刻做了“那张脸”）你的表情变了！

Chandler

I can't help it!

我控制不了！

Joey

All right, all right, all right, all right, you wanna know what I do when I take resume shots?

好吧，好吧，你知道我拍简历照时怎么做吗？

Chandler

Borrow money from me?

跟我借钱？

Joey

Okay, first---first of all, you want to make it look spontaneous. I look down (Looks down), look down, keep looking down; then I look up. (Looks up and smiles.) See? All right, now you try. Look down (Chandler looks down), you're looking down, keep looking down...

好的，首先要表现自然。我向下看，向下看，继续向下看，然后抬起头。（抬起头微笑）看到了吗？现在你试一下。向下看……继续向下看……

Chandler

Why is there jelly on your shoe?

为什么你的鞋上有果酱？

Joey

I had a donut. (Chandler nods.)

我吃了甜麦圈。（钱德点头。）

Rachel

(entering) Hi!

（进来）嗨！

Joey

Hey!

嘿！

Chandler

Hey!

嘿！

Rachel

So uh, heard you had some fun with Tag last night.

你昨晚跟Tag玩的很开心，嗯？

Joey

Yeah! That guy's all right!

对，那家伙蛮好的！

Rachel

Yeah and you had fun teaching him how to be all Joey.

你教了他怎样……乔。

Joey

What?

什么？

Rachel

Y'know, all the women.

你知道，泡妞。

Joey

Hey well, you can't teach someone to be good with women. Y'know, that's why I never had any luck with Chandler.

嘿，女人缘是与生俱来的。所以我跟Chandler一起就很倒霉。

Chandler

(Pause) I'm right here!

（停顿）我在这里！

Rachel

All right, would-would you mind just not going out with him again? Okay, just the idea of you and he and all these women, it's just---And I know he's my assistant and I can't date him---but it just bothers me, all right?!

好吧，不要再跟他一起出去了，好吗？你跟她一起泡妞的事……我知道他是我的助手，我不能跟他约会，但这很烦，好吗？！

Joey

Hey! No-no-no-no, you can't take him away from me! I got a great partner to pick up girls with! Finally!!

不，你不能从我这抢走他！我终于找到能一起吸引异性的伙伴了，精选的！

Chandler

I'm still right here!

我还在这里！

Rachel

All right, will you, will you at least tell him how hollow and unsatisfying this, dating tons of women thing is!

好，麻烦你至少告诉他，跟这么多女人约会是非常无聊的。

Joey

(shocked) What?!

（震惊）什么？！

Rachel

I just don't want him to meet anybody until I am over my crush---And I will get over it. It's-it's not like I love him, it's just physical! But---I mean I get crushes like this all the time! I mean hell, I had a crush on you when I first met ya!

我不想他跟别人约会，现在我还对他有兴趣？我会克服的。我又不是爱他，只是爱他的外表！我经常这样的！我刚认识你时也对你有兴趣。

Joey

I know, Monica told me.

我知道，莫妮卡对我说过。

Chandler

Did you have a crush on me, when you first met me?

那你认识我时，对我有兴趣吗？

Rachel

Yeah. Sure. (Joey nods his head questioningly and Rachel nods no.)

耶，当然。（乔伊疑惑地点头，瑞秋摇头表示没有。）

Chandler

Can you people not see me?! (He waves his arms around to get their attention.)

难道你们看不到我吗？！（他挥舞手臂引起注意。）

Rachel

(To Joey) So, will you talk to him?

（对乔伊）那，你会跟他说吧？

Joey

I don't know Rach.

我不知道，瑞秋。

Rachel

Oh, come on! I'll give you ten free Ralph Lauren shirts.

喔，我送你十件名牌衬衫。

Joey

One! (Pause.) No ten! You said ten! You can't take that back!

一件！（停顿）不，十件！你说的十件！说话要算数！

Tag

Hey Joey, you wanted to talk to me?

Tag：嗨，乔，找我有事吗？

Joey

I don't know. You uh, you got something for me?

我不知道。你带了东西给我吗？

Tag

Oh, yeah, this is from Rachel. (He hands Joey the bag and he quickly counts its contents.)

Tag：喔，是的，这是瑞秋让我带来的。（他把袋子递给乔伊，乔伊迅速数了数里面的东西。）

Joey

Ten. Okay. Now Tag there's such a thing as too many women.

十件。好的。Tag，女人太多未必是好的。

Tag

Really?

Tag：真的？

Joey

Yeah, for you!

是的，对你而言。

Monica

(seeing him approach) Hey! There you are!

（看见他走过来）嗨，你来！

Chandler

There I am!

我来了。

Monica

Are you okay?

你还好吗？

Chandler

Yeah, Joey said I uh, I needed to relax so he gave me an antihistamine.

是的，乔说我要……我需要放松，所以他给我吃了过敏药。

Monica

What?!

什么？！

Chandler

Yeah, and then I fell asleep on the subway and went all the way to Brooklyn. Brooklyn is f-far!!

是的，我坐地铁时睡着了，一直坐到布鲁克林。布鲁克林很远……

Monica

Chandler, what were you thinking?

钱德，你在想什么？

Chandler

I don't know, but don't worry, don't worry, because I know how to take a picture now. (They get ready) Okay, see? Look down (Looks down), look down, look down... (He falls asleep.)

不知道，但不用担心，因为我知道怎么拍照了。（他们准备好）好的，看？向下看，向下看，向下看……（他睡着了。）

Monica

Chandler?

钱德？

Chandler

(awakens) Yeah! (Looks up and does The Face.)

（醒来）在！（抬起头，做了“那张脸”。）

Phoebe

Hi.

嗨。

Ross

Hi.

嗨。

Phoebe

So, how are things going with crazy? Has she cooked your rabbit yet?

跟那疯女人怎么样？她把你的兔子煮了吗？

Ross

Listen, you are hearing one side of the story, okay---and F.Y.I she must've shown Kyle over 30 paint samples before she painted that room! And his response to each one was, "I don't give a tiny rat's ass."

听我说，你只是听了一面之词，明白吗？告诉你，她染房子前给Kyle看过30多个色版，然后他却说“我不管这些小事”。

Phoebe

Yeah well, maybe she should've spent a little less time decorating and a little more time in the bedroom.

好的，但他应该少点时间去染墙，花多点时间在卧室。

Ross

Well, I don't think we are gonna have that problem, but maybe that's just because I am not emotionally unavailable!

我想我们不会发生这种问题，可能因为我不是性冷淡。

Phoebe

You think he's emotionally unavailable?

你以为他是性冷淡？

Ross

I think he can be.

我想有可能。

Phoebe

Well, maybe he wouldn't be if she didn't bring the office home every night!

她不每天把公事带回家，他就不会！

Ross

Well, excuse her for knowing what she wants to do with her life!

那是她知道了她生活的目标！

Phoebe

Yeah well, she certainly knew what she was doing New Year's Eve 1997.

她一定记得1997年圣诞夜做过的事。

Ross

(angrily) I knew you were gonna throw that in my face!! That was three years ago! She apologized and she apologized! What more do you want?!!

（生气地）我早知道你会说起这件事！！那是三年前的事！她已经不断道歉了！你还想怎么样？！

Phoebe

(gets up and starts to leave) We want the last six years back!!

（起身准备离开）我们后悔付出了六年的时间！！

Ross

So do we!! So do we!! (Ross notices a couple has been staring at them.) I'm sorry you had to see that.

我们也是！！我们也是！！（罗斯注意到一对情侣一直在看他们）不好意思让你们见怪了。

Tag

Good morning Rachel.

Tag：早上好，瑞秋。

Rachel

Hi! (He hands her, her mail) Thanks, hey so uh what'd you do last night?

嗨，谢谢。昨天晚上怎么样？

Tag

Went out with Joey.

Tag：跟乔出去了。

Rachel

Oh yeah? Another night of birdogging the chickas?

是吗？又去泡妞了？

Tag

No. We had a really good talk. I don't think I'm gonna do that bar scene anymore.

Tag：不，我们谈的很投机。我以后不会再流连酒吧。

Rachel

Wow! I did not see that coming.

哇，你好象变了一个人。

Tag

It's just not really who I am. Y'know, I've always been happier when...Why am I telling you this? You don't care about this stuff.

Tag：那不是真正的我。我会很开心，假如……我为什么说呢？你没兴趣听。

Rachel

Oh no, yes I do! I do! I mean, come on go on, you were, you were saying I am happier when uh, y'know?

不，我有兴趣！继续说，你刚才说“你会很开心，假如……”

Tag

When I'm in a relationship, I love having a girlfriend.

Tag：假如我有一个正式的，我很爱她的女朋友。

Rachel

Really?

真的？

Tag

Someone I can spoil, y'know?

Tag：我可以宠爱她，你知道。

Rachel

Sp-spoil?

宠爱？

Tag

Uh-huh! Let me ask you something?

Tag：嗯哼！我问你些东西。

Rachel

Uh-huh.

嗯？

Tag

Do you believe that there is one perfect person for everyone?

Tag：你相信缘分是上天注定吗？

Rachel

Well, I-I'm startin' too.

我也开始相信了。

Tag

And if that person is already in your life, you should do something about it right?

Tag：如果那个人已经出现在你身边，你应该去把握吗？

Rachel

Yes! Hell yes!

对，当然应该！

Tag

All right then, it's settled.

Tag：好的，那我决定了！

Rachel

Okay.

好的。

Tag

I'm gettin' back together with my ex-girlfriend.

Tag：我决定跟前女友复合。

Rachel

I'd love to!

求之不得！

Tag

What?

Tag：什么？

Rachel

(panics, turns around, picks up the phone, and pretend to talk on it) Hello?! (Listens) Oh, yeah! (To Tag) This is gonna be a while. Excuse me. (Tag leaves and she closes the door behind him, disgustedly.) Yeah!

（惊慌失措，转身，拿起电话假装在打）喂？！喔，是！（对Tag）要说一会……你出去一下。（Tag离开，她关上门，厌恶地）好！

Ross

My God!

上帝啊！

Phoebe

Oh, I'm sorry. Is that annoying? And speaking about being selfish in bed, how's Whitney?

喔，对不起，你觉得烦吗？说到对性事很自私，Whitney怎么样？

Ross

Well maybe she wouldn't have to be selfish in bed if someone else knew where everything was!

假如某人了解，她就不用自私！

Phoebe

Oh he knows! (Quietly) For the most part.

噢，他知道！知道大部分。

(Kyle and Whitney enter.)

（Kyle和Whitney进来。）

Kyle

Oh hey! Good, you're both here.

Kyle：嗨！好极了，你们都在。

Whitney

We kinda need to talk.

Whitney：我们有些东西要谈。

Phoebe

Both of you together?

你们两个一起？

Ross

Wh-what's up?

什么事？

Whitney

Well, I went over to Kyle's last night to pick up a few things and we got to reminiscing...

Whitney：我昨晚去Kyle家拿回东西，然后我们和好了。

Kyle

...we talked through most of the night and we realized that the reason we were so angry at each other was because there are still feelings there. So... (Pause)

Kyle：我们谈了一晚，然后找到了生气的原因。因为互相还有感觉……所以……（停顿）

Ross

Oh just say it Kyle!

有话直说，Kyle！

Kyle

We're gonna give it another try.

Kyle：我们想给对方一个机会。

Phoebe

What about her whining and her constant need for attention?!

但她一直抱怨你冷落她？！

Whitney

I'm gonna work on that.

Whitney：我会改变的。

Phoebe

Oh right, because you're so capable of change.

喔，对，因为你很善变。

Ross

(To Whitney) Y'know, he hums when he pees!

（对Whitney）你知道，他小便时嗯嗯声！

Whitney

I do know.

Whitney：我知道。

Ross

It makes him miss the bowl, but whatever.

这使他射过界，但也无所谓。

Whitney

We're so sorry. (They get up to leave.)

Whitney：我们很对不起。（他们起身离开。）

Ross

That's all right, we-we don't need you. In fact, hey I'm over it already.

没关系，我们-我们不需要你们。实际上，我已经克服了。

Phoebe

Yeah, and y'know what? I don't give a tiny rat's ass.

对，这些小事我不在乎。

Kyle

Yeah, we're gonna go. (They leave.)

Kyle：好吧，我们走。（他们离开。）

Ross

(To Phoebe) I'm sorry. Ugh, Pheebs, you were, you were right about her. Y'know, she did try to use sex as a weapon! Yeah, I hurt my back a little.

（对菲比）对不起，菲比，你说的对。她用性做武器！我的背还有点疼。

Phoebe

Oh. Y'know, he hums while he does other stuff to.

他做其他的事也嗯嗯声。

Ross

Yeah, we're better off without them.

没有他们可真好。

Phoebe

And y'know, even if they break up again, you'd better not let him in your sad men's club!

如果他们再分手，你也不能让他加入悲伤男人俱乐部！

Ross

Divorced men's club.

离婚男人俱乐部。

Phoebe

Potato, Potaato. (She's pronounces potato with the both the short and long As.)

挑三捡四。（她用短音和长音发potato这个词。）

Ending Credits

片尾字幕

Monica

Hey guys check it out! My mom sent me the paper!

嗨，你们看！我妈妈把报纸寄来了！

Phoebe

Ooh, let's see it!

喔，拿来看看。

Chandler

Ahhh.

啊。

Monica

Okay. (She opens it up and shows it to them.)

好的。（她打开报纸给他们看。）

Chandler

Oh yeah, that looks good.

拍的不错嘛。

Phoebe

You guys make a very attractive couple. (The camera cuts to a shot of the picture and we see that Monica is posing with Joey instead of Chandler.)

你们两个很配嘛。（镜头切到照片，我们看到莫妮卡是和乔伊在一起而不是钱德。）

Joey

Yeah, we look great together.

对，我们很配。

Monica

Yeah, we really do!

对，我们还可以！

Chandler

Okay.

好的。

Monica

Wow! Imagine what our kids would look like!

设想一下我们孩子的样子！

Joey

Y'know, we don't have to imagine.

我们不需要设想。

Chandler

I'm marrying her.

是我要娶她。

Joey

We'll just see.

等着瞧吧。

End

结束