The One After Vegas

Chandler

Okay! (Stands up) This is it! (Claps his hands) We're gonna get married!

好了！（站起来）就是现在！（拍手）我们要结婚了！

Monica

Are you sure you wanna do this?

你确定要这么做吗？

(Suddenly the doors burst open, and ROSS AND RACHEL COME OUT ARM-IN-ARM!!!!! And Rachel's carrying a bouquet!!! THEY GOT MARRIED!!!!)

（突然门被撞开，罗斯和瑞秋手挽手走出来！！！！瑞秋还拿着一束花！！！他们结婚了！！！！）

Ross

Well, hello, Mrs. Ross! (Throws some rice.)

你好啊，罗斯太太！（撒米）

Rachel

Well, hello, Mr. Rachel! (Throws some more rice.)

你好啊，瑞秋先生！（撒更多的米）

(They storm out into the street.)

（他们冲到大街上。）

Rachel

Wait! (Gets her bearings) Okay!

等等！（辨明方向）好了！

(She goes one way; he goes the other. The camera pans back to Chandler and Monica, and needless to say, they're standing there dumbstruck.)

（她往一边走，他往另一边走。镜头转回钱德勒和莫妮卡，不用说，他们目瞪口呆地站在那里。）

Monica

Whoa!

哇！

Chandler

Oh my God!

天哪！

Joey

(entering with Phoebe) Come on Pheebs! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!

（和菲比一起进来）快点菲比斯！快！快！快！快！

Phoebe

Okay! Okay! Okay! (They run into the chapel.)

好了！好了！好了！（他们跑进教堂。）

(Chandler and Monica are stunned again.)

（钱德勒和莫妮卡再次目瞪口呆。）

Chandler

Oh my God!! Is everybody getting married?!!

天哪！！所有人都要结婚了吗？！

(Phoebe and Joey run back out and head towards the street.)

（菲比和乔伊又跑出来，朝街上去。）

Attendant

(scolding them) N-No running in the chapel!

（训斥他们）不——不能在教堂里跑！

Phoebe

(to her) Hey! Don't you give me any of your---Hey! (Sees Chandler and Monica standing there.)

（对她说）嘿！别跟我来那套——嘿！（看到钱德勒和莫妮卡站在那儿。）

Chandler

Hey!

嘿！

Joey

Hey!

嘿！

Monica

What are you guys doing here?

你们来这儿干嘛？

Joey

Ross and Rachel left us a message saying they were getting married! Isn't that why you guys are here?

罗斯和瑞秋给我们留了条消息说他们要结婚！你们不也是为此而来的吗？

Chandler

Yes! Well that-yes.

对！嗯——对。

Monica

Why else would we be here?

不然我们还能为什么来？

Joey

Well! What happened?! Did we miss it?

那！发生了什么？！我们错过了吗？

Chandler

We actually missed it.

我们确实错过了。

Phoebe

Well, maybe you wouldn't have had you (turns to the attendant) run in the chapel!

也许你们就不会错过，如果你们（转向服务员）在教堂里跑的话！

Monica

This is insane!

这太疯狂了！

Phoebe

What's the big deal, y'know? It's not like it's a real marriage.

有什么大不了的，你知道吗？这又不算真正的婚姻。

Chandler

What?!

什么？！

Phoebe

Yeah, if you get married in Vegas, you're only married in Vegas.

对啊，如果你在拉斯维加斯结婚，你只在拉斯维加斯算已婚。

Monica

What are you talking about? If you get married in Vegas you're married everywhere.

你在说什么啊？如果你在拉斯维加斯结婚，你在哪里都算已婚。

Phoebe

(shocked) Really?!

（震惊）真的吗？！

Monica

Yeah!

对啊！

Phoebe

Oh my God!---Eh! Well...

天哪！——呃！好吧……

Opening Credits

片头字幕

{Transciber's note: In case you haven't heard, Courteney Cox got married to David Arquette during hiatus and changed her name to Courteney Cox Arquette. But David was a busy boy during the off season for not only did he marry but everyone else as well. For they're all listed as Jennifer Aniston Arquette, Lisa Kudrow Arquette, in an interesting twist Matt LeBlanc Arquette, Matthew Perry Arquette, David Schwimmer Arquette, and even the creators of the show are now David Crane Arquette and Marta Kauffman Arquette. I just wonder what the new sleeping arrangements are...}

以防你没听说，寇特妮·考克斯在剧歇期嫁给了大卫·阿奎特，改名为寇特妮·考克斯·阿奎特。但大卫在休季期可是个大忙人，不仅他结了婚，其他人也都结了。因为他们都被列为詹妮弗·安妮斯顿·阿奎特、丽莎·库卓·阿奎特，有趣的是还有马特·勒布朗·阿奎特、马修·派瑞·阿奎特、大卫·休默·阿奎特，甚至剧集的创作者现在也是大卫·克兰·阿奎特和玛塔·考夫曼·阿奎特。我只是好奇新的睡觉安排是怎样的……）

Rachel

Ohhh! (Looks in the mirror and sees that she still has her mustache and groans.)

哦——！（照镜子，看到自己还留着胡子，呻吟起来。）

(Suddenly, there's movement beside her, startling her. It's Ross! He wakes up and they both start screaming in terror. Then they both grab their heads having aggravated their hangovers.)

（突然，旁边有动静，吓了她一跳。是罗斯！他醒了，两人都惊恐地尖叫起来。然后两人都因为加重了宿醉而抱住头。）

Ross

Why are we in bed together?

我们怎么在一张床上？

Rachel

I don't know. Do-do you have any clothes on?

我不知道。你——你穿着衣服吗？

Ross

(checks) Yeah.

（检查）穿着。

Rachel

Really?!

真的吗？！

Ross

No! But we-we didn't have...sex-uh, did we? I mean, I don't remember much about last night, it was such a blur.

没有！但我们——我们没有……做——爱，对吧？我是说，昨晚的事我记不太清了，一片模糊。

Rachel

Oh! I remember laughing! I laughed a lot.

哦！我记得笑！我笑了很多。

Ross

And we didn't have sex.

而且我们没有做爱。

(Rachel agrees with him and starts to get out of bed.)

（瑞秋同意他，准备下床。）

Rachel

Ohh, I mean, we were really drunk. I'm just glad we didn't do anything stupid.

哦，我是说，我们真的喝醉了。我很庆幸我们没做什么傻事。

Ross

(getting up) Tell me about it. (He sits up on the edge of the bed and has "Just Married" written on his back.)

（起身）可不是嘛。（他坐在床边，背上写着“新婚”字样。）

Joey

Mornin' Pheebs. (Sits down.) Well, my movie has officially been canceled.

早啊菲比斯。（坐下。）嗯，我的电影正式取消了。

Phoebe

Oh Joey, I'm so sorry. You want some of my breakfast?

哦乔伊，我真难过。你想吃点我的早餐吗？

Joey

Nah, I'm too depressed to eat. I'll probably eat in like 5 minutes. So I guess I'll just fly home with you guys, what time's your flight?

不了，我太沮丧了吃不下。可能过5分钟就吃得下了。所以我想我就跟你们一起飞回家，你们的航班几点？

Phoebe

What about my cab?

我的出租车怎么办？

Joey

I don't need that anymore.

我不需要那个了。

Phoebe

No, Joey! You borrowed my cab; you have to drive it back.

不行，乔伊！你借了我的出租车，你得把它开回去。

Joey

I don't want to drive all the way back by myself, I get so lonely. (Gets an idea.) Oh---ooh! How about you come with me?

我不想一个人开那么远回去，我会很孤单的。（有了主意）哦——哦！你跟我一起怎么样？

Phoebe

I don't know, it's such a long trip.

我不知道，路太远了。

Joey

It'll be great! We-we could talk, and play games! Huh? This could be our chance to like renew our friendship.

会很棒的！我们可以聊天，玩游戏！嗯？这可能是我们重燃友情的机会。

Phoebe

Are you asking me to have a frenaissance?

你是在邀请我来一场“友情复兴”吗？

Joey

Sure?

算是吧？

Phoebe

All right. Although I don't think we need one, I never stopped loving you.

好吧。虽然我觉得我们不需要，我从来就没停止过爱你。

(Chandler and Monica enter.)

（钱德勒和莫妮卡进来。）

Chandler

Hi!

嗨！

Joey

Hey.

嘿。

Monica

Hey.

嘿。

Chandler

So, has anyone talked to Dr. and Mrs. Geller yet?

那么，有人跟盖勒医生夫妇谈过了吗？

Phoebe

Um-hmm, yeah. They left me a message; they should be here any minute.

嗯哼，对。他们给我留了条消息，他们应该随时会到。

Joey

Where is the waitress?! I'm starving!

女服务员在哪儿？！我饿死了！

Chandler

It's a buffet man.

这是自助餐，哥们。

Joey

Oh, here's where I win all my money back! (Gets up and heads for the buffet table with Chandler in tow.)

哦，这就是我把所有钱赢回来的地方！（起身，拽着钱德勒朝自助餐台走去。）

Chandler

Listen, I gotta talk to you.

听着，我得跟你谈谈。

Joey

Sure! What's up? (He grabs a plate and proceeds to load it with a huge pile of scrambled eggs. Chandler just stares at him and Joey reluctantly gives him a spoonful.)

好啊！怎么了？（他抓起一个盘子，开始堆一大堆炒鸡蛋。钱德勒只是盯着他，乔伊不情愿地给了他一小勺。）

Chandler

Monica and I almost got married last night.

莫妮卡和我昨晚差点结婚了。

Joey

Oh my God! That's huge! (Hugs him.) Wait a minute, why come I wasn't invited? And who was going to be your best man? Don't say, "Ross." Do not say, "Ross."

天哪！这可是大事！（拥抱他。）等等，为什么我没被邀请？谁要当你的伴郎？别说“罗斯”。千万别说“罗斯”。

Chandler

Look, I just don't think Monica and I are ready to get married yet! Y'know? I mean, I love her and everything but seeing Ross and Rachel coming out of that chapel was like a, like a wake-up call that Monica and I are moving so fast. Y'know? And, how do I tell her without crushing her?

听着，我只是觉得莫妮卡和我还没准备好结婚！你知道吗？我是说，我爱她什么的，但看到罗斯和瑞秋从那个教堂出来，就像——就像一个警钟，提醒我和莫妮卡进展太快了。你知道吗？而且，我该怎么告诉她才不会打击到她？

Joey

Oh! Tell her she's not marriage material.

哦！告诉她她不适合结婚。

Chandler

What?!

什么？！

Joey

Girls say it to me all the time! And believe me, if she's anything like me, she's just gonna be relieved.

女孩们总是这么对我说！相信我，如果她跟我一样，她会如释重负的。

Monica

How do I tell Chandler that it's too soon. It's gonna break his heart, he's not gonna think that I don't love him anymore.

我怎么告诉钱德勒这太快了。这会让他心碎，他会以为我不再爱他了。

Phoebe

Well you don't.

嗯，你确实不爱了。

Monica

Yes I do!

我当然爱！

Phoebe

Good! Good! I was just testing you.

好！好！我只是在试探你。

Chandler

(returning with Joey) Hi.

（和乔伊回来）嗨。

Monica

Oh hi! Hi! Y'know, we were just talking about bacon.

哦嗨！嗨！你知道吗，我们刚才在聊培根。

Phoebe

No, we were talking about tennis. Tennis is more believable.

不，我们在聊网球。网球更可信。

(Ross and Rachel enter.)

（罗斯和瑞秋进来。）

Ross

Hey!

嘿！

The Girls

Hey!

嘿！

Chandler

Hey!

嘿！

(They both sit down and Rachel pours them both some coffee. They're acting like nothing's happened and everyone is just staring at them.)

（两人坐下，瑞秋给他们倒了咖啡。他们表现得像什么都没发生，所有人都盯着他们看。）

Ross

What?

怎么了？

Chandler

Are we gonna talk about what you guys did last night? Or...

我们要不要谈谈你们昨晚做的事？还是……

Rachel

(To Ross) I don't know. (To the gang.) What do you mean last night? Nothing, nothing uh, happened last night.

（对罗斯）我不知道。（对大家）你指昨晚什么意思？没什么，没什么呃，昨晚什么都没发生。

Ross

Yeah!

对！

Phoebe

Uh-huh! Ross invited us all to watch.

嗯哼！罗斯邀请我们大家去看的。

(Rachel turns to Ross stunned.)

（瑞秋震惊地转向罗斯。）

Monica

Rach! We weren't gonna miss our friends getting married!

瑞秋！我们可不会错过朋友结婚！

Rachel

(gasps) Who got married?! (Ross is as surprised to hear this as she is.)

（倒吸一口气）谁结婚了？！（罗斯听到这个和她一样惊讶。）

Chandler

(not quite sure) You did.

（不太确定）你们俩。

Ross

What?! Hello! We didn't get married.

什么？！喂！我们没结婚。

Rachel

No, we didn't get married! That's ridiculous!

不，我们没结婚！太荒谬了！

(They turn to look at each other and suddenly remember that they did in fact get married.)

（他们转身对视，突然想起他们的确结婚了。）

Ross

We-we-we---I remember being in a chapel.

我们——我们——我们——我记得在教堂里。

Rachel

Oh my God.

天哪。

Ross

I---They would not let us get married when we were that drunk!

我——他们不会让我们醉成那样还结婚的！

Rachel

No!

不！

Joey

They let you get married when you're drunk! Most people who get married in Vegas are drunk!

他们让你醉着结婚！大多数在拉斯维加斯结婚的人都是醉的！

Phoebe

Hell, I'm drunk right now! (They all turn and look at her.) What? I can't have a mimosa with breakfast?! I'm on vacation!

见鬼，我现在就醉了！（大家都转头看她。）怎么了？我不能早餐喝含羞草鸡尾酒吗？！我在度假！

Monica

What are you guys gonna do?

你们打算怎么办？

Rachel

Well, I guess we just find a divorce lawyer? (Looks at Ross.)

嗯，我想我们找个体婚律师吧？（看向罗斯。）

Chandler

Well, I think, I think, Ross already has one. Now, this one's free, right? Because you paid for the first two, so the third one's free.

嗯，我想，我想罗斯已经有一个了。这个免费，对吧？因为你付了前两次的钱，所以第三次免费。

Ross

Laugh it up, but the joke's on you. Because we don't need to get divorced, okay? We we're just gonna get an annulment.

笑吧，但笑话在你们身上。因为我们不需要离婚，好吗？我们只需要申请婚姻无效。

Joey

An annulment? Ross! I don't think surgery's the answer here.

婚姻无效？罗斯！我不觉得手术能解决问题。

Phoebe

Oh-oh, that's your thing.

哦哦，那是你的标签。

Ross

What?

什么？

Phoebe

You're thing. You're thing. Y'know? You're the guy who gets divorced.

你的标签。你的标签。你知道吗？你就是那个老离婚的人。

All

Oh yeah!

哦对！

Ross

No-no, that's-that's not my thing! I do not love getting divorced!

不——不，那不是我的标签！我不喜欢离婚！

Phoebe

Yes you do! This is your third divorce! You love divorce so much you're probably gonna marry it! Then it won't work out and you're gonna have to divorce it, divorcing guy. (Pause) I'm so drunk.

你就是喜欢！这是你第三次离婚了！你这么喜欢离婚，你可能会跟离婚结婚！然后婚姻不成功，你又得跟它离婚，离婚男。（停顿）我太醉了。

Monica

So, what do you think we should do?

那么，你觉得我们该怎么办？

Chandler

I don't know. But I-I-I know I love you!

我不知道。但我——我——我知道我爱你！

Monica

I know I love you! (They hug.)

我知道我爱你！（他们拥抱。）

Chandler

So where are we on the whole going back to the place where they have all the marriages thing? I love you.

那么，关于回去那个可以结婚的地方，我们怎么想的？我爱你。

Monica

That's a good question. Look umm, last night we let the dice decide. Maybe we should leave it up to fate again. I love you!

问得好。听着嗯，昨晚我们让骰子决定。也许我们应该再次交给命运。我爱你！

Chandler

Yes, we don't get married unless there's a sign! Okay, so say uh, say you roll another eight (motions to the craps table) then there's a definite sign that we should get married.

对，除非有征兆，否则我们不结婚！好吧，比如说呃，比如说你再扔出一个八（示意双骰子赌桌），那么就是一个明确的征兆，我们应该结婚。

Monica

All right, eight we get married, but 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 9, 10, 11, 12 we don't get married.

好吧，八我们就结婚，但是二、三、四、五、六、七、九、十、十一、十二我们就不结婚。

Chandler

Sounds great.

听起来很棒。

Monica

Okay. (They approach the craps table.)

好吧。（他们走向双骰子赌桌。）

Croupler

Coming in, we got a shooter! Money please.

来了，有掷骰手了！请下注。

Monica

Ready?

准备好了？

Chandler

Ready!

准备好了！

Monica

(sarcastic) Come on eight.

（讽刺地）来个八吧。

Chandler

(deadpan) Yes, yes eight.

（面无表情）对，对，八。

(Monica rolls the dice.)

（莫妮卡掷骰子。）

Croupler

Eight! Easy eight. (She rolls a 3 and a 5 and they're stunned.)

八！简单八。（她掷出一个三和一个五，两人都惊呆了。）

Monica

Wow! I can't believe I actually rolled an eight.

哇！我真不敢相信我居然掷出了八。

Chandler

That was so unlikely.

那太不可能了。

Chandler

Well, let's get married! I guess.

嗯，我们结婚吧！我猜。

Monica

Wait a minute. That wasn't a hard eight! Last night I rolled a hard eight.

等一下。那不是“硬八”！昨晚我掷了个“硬八”。

Chandler

That's right! It was the wrong kind of eight, no wedding! Damnit!

没错！是错的八，不结婚了！该死！

Monica

I wanted it so bad! (Pause) Wanna go pack?

我好想结婚啊！（停顿）想去打包吗？

Chandler

Yeah. (They go pack.) We're doing the right thing, right?

嗯。（他们去打包。）我们做的是对的，对吧？

Monica

Ohh, of course we are! (They walk up to the elevators.) We left it up to fate. (Pushes the elevator button.) If we were supposed to get married there would be a clear-cut sign. (The elevator door opens to a priest reading from a bible with Chandler and Monica standing side-by-side holding each other's hands.)

哦，当然是对的！（他们走向电梯。）我们交给了命运。（按电梯按钮。）如果我们该结婚，就会有明确的征兆。（电梯门打开，里面一位牧师正在读圣经，钱德勒和莫妮卡并排站着，手牵着手。）

Phoebe

Okay, you have 19 questions left. Use them wisely. (Joey groans.) Come on Joey! You can't win if you don't ask any (sees that he's asleep) QUESTIONS!!!

好了，你还剩19个问题。明智地使用。（乔伊呻吟。）快点乔伊！你什么都不问是赢不了的（看到他睡着了）问题！！！

Joey

(wakes up) What?!

（醒来）什么？！

Phoebe

Well, you promised me a fun road trip! We've been on the road six hours and you've been asleep for five and a half! We are switching at the next rest stop and you are going to drive all the way back! That will be your punishment, you greedy sleeper!

哼，你答应过我一个愉快的公路旅行！我们上路六个小时，你睡了五个半小时！我们在下一个休息站换人，你要一直开回去！这就是对你的惩罚，你这个贪睡的懒虫！

Joey

All right. All right.

好吧。好吧。

Phoebe

Yeah! And until then you are going to sing to me because the radio's broken and you are selfish but have a nice voice.

对！在那之前你要唱歌给我听，因为收音机坏了，而且你很自私但嗓音不错。

Joey

Really? I don't...

真的吗？我不……

Phoebe

Sing!!

唱！！

Joey

(starts singing) I wanna rock and roll all night! (Falls asleep.)

（开始唱）我想整夜摇滚！（睡着了。）

Joey

(to himself) Man, this is a long drive! Are my eyes open? No! (He opens his eyes and sees a hitchhiker.)

（自言自语）天啊，这路好长啊！我眼睛睁着吗？没有！（他睁开眼睛，看到一个搭便车的人。）

Hitchhiker

(driving) Morning! (Phoebe screams again.)

（开车）早啊！（菲比又尖叫。）

Ross

Hey!

嘿！

Rachel

Hey, hubby!

嘿，老公！

Ross

Yeah. Yeah, actually um, I wanted to talk to you about that whole annulment thing?

对。对，实际上呃，我想跟你谈谈那个婚姻无效的事？

Rachel

Uh-huh.

嗯哼。

Ross

I'm not going to do that. (Rachel glares at him.)

我不打算去办。（瑞秋瞪着他。）

Commercial Break

广告时间

Rachel

Okay! So, we'll just stay married.

好吧！那我们就保持结婚状态。

Ross

Yes, exactly!

对，正是！

Rachel

And I will make everyone call me Mrs. Geller!

而且我会让所有人都叫我盖勒太太！

Ross

Wow! This is so amazing. I uh, I really thought I'd have to talk you into this more.

哇！这太神奇了。我呃，我真的以为还得再多劝你几句。

Rachel

Okay, see now I'm scared because I don't actually think you're kidding.

好吧，我现在害怕了，因为我真不觉得你在开玩笑。

Ross

I'm-I'm not kidding. Look I-I, I can't have three failed marriages. I can't. Okay? I-I am not gonna be that guy!

我——我不是开玩笑。听着我——我，不能有三次失败的婚姻。我不能。好吗？我——我不会成为那种人！

Rachel

What-wh-what so we'll just stay married forever?!

什么——那我们就永远保持结婚状态？！

Ross

Okay, look, how is this gonna affect you? Really? I mean you fill some form out once and a while and instead of checking the box that says Ms you check the box that says Mrs.! It's right next to it!

好吧，听着，这对你会有什么影响？说真的？我是说，你偶尔填个表，不勾“女士”那个框，而是勾“太太”那个框！就在旁边！

Rachel

Ohh, okay, I'm sorry. You're right. Y'know what? We absolutely can stay married, because I was under the impression that the boxes were far away from each other. All right, look, just please, take a moment here and think about what you're asking of me.

哦，好吧，对不起。你说得对。你知道吗？我们绝对可以保持结婚状态，因为我之前以为那两个框离得很远。好吧，听着，求你了，花点时间想想你在向我要求什么。

Ross

I'm asking you to do me a favor.

我在请你帮我一个忙。

{Note: Does anyone else want to smack Ross right about now? Raise your hands. Okay, put them down before you stink out the person next to you.}

还有别人现在想揍罗斯吗？举手。好了，在熏到你旁边的人之前把手放下。）

Rachel

You are asking me to be your wife!

你在要求我做你的妻子！

Ross

And as my wife I think you should grant me this favor.

而且作为我的妻子，我觉得你应该帮我这个忙。

Monica

That kid really kicked me hard on the plane.

飞机上那个小孩踢得我真狠。

Chandler

Well you did pull his hair.

可你也拽他头发了。

Monica

He took my snack!

他拿走了我的零食！

Chandler

I'm not getting into this again!

我不想再争这个了！

Monica

Okay! Oh God, y'know what? It's really bad.

好吧！哦天，你知道吗？真的很严重。

Chandler

Well, I told you not to walk. Here. (Picks her up.) There. Okay. (He opens the door, carries her across the threshold, stops, backs out, and lets go of Monica who is only holding on by his neck.)

嗯，我告诉过你别走路。来。（抱起她）好了。好吧。（他打开门，抱着她跨过门槛，停下，退出来，松开莫妮卡，而她只是搂着他的脖子。）

Monica

This doesn't mean anything, does it?

这代表不了什么，对吧？

Chandler

No!

不！

Monica

Okay.

好吧。

Phoebe

(To Joey) How could you pick up a hitchhiker?! He could be a rape---(She holds her hand in front of the hitchhiker's face), a rapist or a killer or something!

（对乔伊）你怎么能搭上搭便车的人？！他可能是强——（她把手挡在搭便车者脸前），强奸犯或者杀人犯之类的！

Joey

Don't you think I asked him that before he got in?!

你以为我让他上车前没问过他吗？！

Phoebe

Y'know what? I'm not talking to you! You go back to sleep! (To the hitchhiker) And you, are you a rapist?!

你知道吗？我不跟你说话了！你回去睡觉！（对搭便车者）还有你，你是强奸犯吗？！

Hitchhiker

No!

不是！

Phoebe

Do you like car games?

你喜欢汽车游戏吗？

Hitchhiker

Yeah, y'know the license plate game?

喜欢，你知道车牌游戏吗？

Phoebe

I love the license plate game!

我超爱车牌游戏！

Joey

Ooh, I'll play! I'll play!

哦，我也玩！我也玩！

Phoebe

No-No! You need your sleep. Night-night! Shh! (She closes the partition.)

不——不！你需要睡觉。晚安！嘘！（她关上隔板。）

Ross

Hey!

嘿！

Rachel

Hey!

嘿！

Ross

Listen, I know you wanted to talk to me, but I have an idea that may make you want to stay married. (Rachel shakes her head.) We register, and you get to keep all the presents!

听着，我知道你想跟我谈谈，但我有个想法可能会让你想保持婚姻。（瑞秋摇头。）我们去登记，然后你得到所有的礼物！

Rachel

(thinks about it for a second) No! Ross, come on! No! Listen, look I thought a lot about how to tell you this and the bottom line, Ross, is we can not stay married.

（想了一秒）不！罗斯，拜托！不！听着，我反复想过该怎么告诉你，归根结底，罗斯，我们不能保持婚姻。

Ross

I don't know if it's true.

我不确定这是不是真的。

Rachel

Oh b-b-but it is!

哦，但——但是是真的！

Ross

Oh, okay, y'know what this is? This is a difference of opinion. And when that happens in a marriage...

哦，好吧，你知道这是什么吗？这是意见分歧。当婚姻中出现这种情况……

Rachel

Oh Ross, come on! This is not, this is not a marriage!! This is the world's worst hangover! Ross, listen, if you do not get this annulment, I will!

哦罗斯，拜托！这不是，这不是婚姻！！这是世界上最糟糕的宿醉！罗斯，听着，如果你不去办婚姻无效，我去办！

Ross

All right. All right, I'll do it.

好吧。好吧，我去办。

Rachel

Thank you. (He goes to leave.) Hey-hey umm, uh, is there, is there any such thing as an annulment shower?

谢谢。（他准备离开。）嘿——嘿嗯，呃，有没有那种“婚姻无效派对”？

(Ross turns and leaves.)

（罗斯转身离开。）

Hitchhiker

Wait! Wait! There is the train station!

等等！等等！这就是火车站！

Phoebe

Oh, okay.

哦，好吧。

Hitchhiker

This is where I get off. Well, I have your address and phone number.

我在这儿下车。嗯，我有你的地址和电话号码。

Phoebe

And I have your name and the fact that you're a drifter, so the ball's pretty much in your court.

而我有你的名字，还有你是个流浪者的事实，所以主动权基本上在你手里。

Hitchhiker

All right, see ya Pheebs. (Gets out and Phoebe drives away.)

好吧，再见菲比斯。（下车，菲比开走了。）

Joey

Come on Pheebs! I can't take this anymore! Let-let me make it up to you. Huh? (Starts singing.) Ground control to Major Tom. Commencing countdown, engines on. Take your protein pills and put your helmet on!

拜托菲比斯！我受不了了！让——让我补偿你。嗯？（开始唱。）地面控制中心呼叫汤姆少校。开始倒计时，发动机启动。吃下你的蛋白质药片，戴上头盔！

Phoebe

Stop it! Stop it no! That's not fair! Y'know I can't resist that beautiful voice!

停下！停下不！这不公平！你知道我无法抗拒那么美的嗓音！

Joey

Pheebs, I am so sorry! I know I promised you a fun road trip with your friend and I didn't deliver. But-but-but now I know that you think being awake is an important part of friendship! So, so, so I will strive to-to stay awake for as long as I know you.

菲比斯，我很抱歉！我知道我答应过给你一个愉快的公路旅行，和你的朋友一起，但我没做到。但——但——但现在我知道你认为保持清醒是友谊的重要部分！所以，所以，所以我会努力——努力一直保持清醒，只要我还认识你。

Phoebe

You can still sleep at night and stuff.

你晚上还是可以睡觉什么的。

Joey

Well, thank you. So, can we play 20 Questions now? I've got a really good one! I've been thinking about it since Kansas.

嗯，谢谢。那么，我们现在能玩二十个问题了吗？我有一个特别好的！我从堪萨斯就开始想了。

Phoebe

Okay. Is it a kind of hot sandwich?

好吧。是一种热三明治吗？

Joey

Yes.

对。

Phoebe

Is it a meatball sub?

是肉丸潜艇堡吗？

Joey

That is incredible! You are the master!

太厉害了！你是大师！

Rachel

Huh, that's funny. You look like you're gonna be the...

嗯，真有趣。你看起来要成为……

Monica

No, don't say it! Don't even think it!

不，别说出来！想都别想！

Rachel

All right. Okay Chandler, enjoy your handful. (Exits.)

好吧。好了钱德勒，享受你手上的麻烦吧。（离开。）

Chandler

All right, should we just, should we just get married? Y'know? I mean should we just do it? All the signs are telling us to do it.

好吧，我们是不是就——我们是不是就结婚算了？你知道吗？我是说我们就这么办？所有征兆都告诉我们该这么做。

Monica

I'm sick of the signs! It's too fast, I'm happy the way things are!

我受够征兆了！太快了，我对现状很满意！

Chandler

Me too!

我也是！

Monica

I don't want things to change! Do you?

我不想改变！你呢？

Chandler

No!

不想！

Monica

All right then, then nothing changes! Everything is great! Everything stays the same! And you go unpack because it's been three days and it's driving me insane!

那好吧，那就什么都不变！一切都很好！一切都保持原样！你去把行李拿出来，因为已经三天了，快把我逼疯了！

Chandler

Jeez, relax! It's not like we're mar-ah-ah!! (Runs out.)

天哪，放松！又不是我们要结——啊——啊！！（跑出去。）

Chandler

(entering, slowly) Y'know I was thinking, what if I uh, unpack here?

（慢慢走进来）你知道吗，我在想，如果我呃，在这儿拆包呢？

Monica

Then all your stuff would be here.

那你所有的东西就都在这儿了。

Chandler

Well, what if all my stuff was here?

嗯，如果我所有的东西都在这儿呢？

Monica

Then you'd be going back and forth all the time, I mean it doesn't make any sense.

那你就得来回跑了，我是说这根本说不通。

Chandler

Okay. What if we lived together and you understand what I'm saying?

好吧。如果我们住在一起呢，你明白我在说什么吗？

Monica

Live together? There have been no signs for that.

住在一起？可没有征兆表明这个。

Chandler

Me asking is kind of a sign.

我这么问也算是一种征兆。

Monica

YES!!!!!!!!

好——的！！！！！！

Chandler

Okay!!!!!

好——了！！！！！！

(And the crowd goes wild! Well, at least the live studio audience.)

（观众沸腾了！嗯，至少现场演播室观众是这样。）

Monica

Yes! Okay! Okay! Wait-wait-wait!

太好了！好吧！好吧！等等——等等——等等！

Chandler

Okay.

好吧。

Monica

Here's your key (Gets him one.)

这是你的钥匙（给他拿了一把。）

Chandler

Oh thanks.

哦谢谢。

Monica

Here's your key. All right, you have to christen it! Now, go out and come back in!

这是你的钥匙。好了，你得给它“洗礼”！现在，出去再进来！

Chandler

The door hasn't been locked in five years, but okay! (Runs out.) Ready?!

这扇门五年没锁过了，不过好吧！（跑出去。）准备好了吗？！

Monica

Ready!

准备好了！

(He tries, but something happens.)

（他试着开门，但出了状况。）

Chandler

Okay, a little problem. The key broke in the lock and I can't get in!

好吧，有个小问题。钥匙断在锁里了，我进不去了！

Monica

Wait! Oh my God! I can't get out!

等等！天哪！我出不去了！

Chandler

This is not a sign!

这不是征兆！

Monica

No, it's not a sign! It's a very old key!

不，不是征兆！这是一把很旧的钥匙！

Chandler

It's an old key!

是旧钥匙！

Monica

Oh my God it's old!

天哪它好旧！

Chandler

I love you!

我爱你！

Monica

I love you!

我爱你！

Chandler

Are you hugging the door right now.

你现在是不是在抱着门？

(Pause)

（停顿）

Monica

No.

没有。

Chandler

Yeah-yeah, me neither.

嗯——嗯，我也是。

Ross

Hey!

嘿！

Rachel

Hey, so did everything go all right with the annulment?

嘿，那么婚姻无效的事一切顺利吗？

Ross

Oh, yeah, no problems. It's all taken care of.

哦，对，没问题。都办妥了。

Rachel

Ross, thank you. Hey, do you guys wanna go see a movie?

罗斯，谢谢你。嘿，你们想去看电影吗？

Ross

Oh yeah, why not?

哦好啊，为什么不？

Rachel

Pheebs?

菲比斯？

Phoebe

No thanks, I've already seen one.

不了谢谢，我已经看过一部了。

Rachel

Okay, umm, I'm gonna get my sweater. (Walks away.)

好吧，嗯，我去拿我的毛衣。（走开。）

Ross

Okay. (Sits down next to Phoebe.) You uh, you wanna hear something weird?

好吧。（在菲比旁边坐下。）你呃，想听点奇怪的事吗？

Phoebe

Always.

永远都想。

Ross

I didn't get the annulment.

我没办婚姻无效。

Phoebe

What?!

什么？！

Ross

We're still married! Don't tell Rachel. See you later. (He gets up leaving Phoebe in shock.)

我们还是夫妻！别告诉瑞秋。回头见。（他起身离开，留下震惊的菲比。）

Ending Credits

片尾字幕

Joey

What are you doing?

你在干嘛？

Chandler

The key's stuck in the lock.

钥匙卡在锁里了。

Joey

I can fix it. Hold on. (He goes and gets a screwdriver from his apartment) Look out. Look out. (Pries at the door a little bit.)

我能修。等等。（他去自己的公寓拿了一把螺丝刀）让开。让开。（轻轻撬门。）

Chandler

(trying the handle) It still doesn't work.

（试把手）还是不行。

Joey

I'm not finished.

我还没弄完。

Chandler

Oh.

哦。

(Joey goes back into the apartment, runs back into the hallway, throws his shoulder against the door, and knocks it down off its hinges.)

（乔伊回到公寓里，又跑回走廊，用肩膀撞门，把门从铰链上撞了下来。）

Chandler

Nice job Joe! You're quite the craftsmen.

干得好乔！你真是个能工巧匠。

(Joey pats him on the stomach and heads to bed.)

（乔伊拍了拍他的肚子，去睡觉了。）

End

结束