The One Where Ross Moves In

Chandler

Are you looking at naked tribe's women?

你在看土著裸女？

Joey

No, look. (Shows him the magazine.)

不，你看。（把杂志给他看。）

Chandler

That's a pig.

是只猪。

Joey

I know, I know, but look at the knobs on her.

我知道，但你看它身上这么多疙瘩。

(Ross enters and his hair is a mess.)

（罗斯进来，头发一团糟。）

Chandler

Hey! (Joey quickly hides the magazine under the couch.)

嘿！（乔伊迅速把杂志藏到沙发底下。）

Ross

Emily's cousin kicked me out!

爱米丽的表弟把我扫地出门了！

Chandler

What?!

什么？！

Joey

Why?

为什么？

Ross

Well, when you're subletting an apartment from your wife's cousin and then you get a divorce, sometimes the cousin suddenly wants his apartment back.

当你从妻子的表弟那里转租公寓，然后你离婚了，有时候表弟会突然想把房子收回去。

Chandler

How can he do that? Didn't you sign a lease?

他怎么能这样？你没签租约？

Ross

Who needs a lease when it's family!

“一家人”签什么租约？

Joey

Hey, you can stay with us! We'll take care of ya!

你跟我们一起住好了，我们照顾你！

Chandler

Oh, yeah! Absolutely! Anything you need man! But you have to promise me the second you are feeling better so that we can make fun of your hair!

当然！没问题！你需要什么尽管说！但你得答应我，一旦你情绪好转，我们就要取笑你的头发。

Joey

Yeah.

可以。

Ross

You got it.

谢谢，非常感谢。

Joey

Okay.

好。

Ross

Thanks you guys, I really appreciate this. All right, I'm gonna get packing again. Man, I've been moving around so much I'm beginning to feel like a nomad.

谢谢你们，真的很感谢。好吧，我又要去收拾行李了。天啊，我搬来搬去太多了，简直像个游牧民族了。

(Joey starts giggling.)

（乔伊开始窃笑。）

Ross

What?

什么？

Chandler

He thought you said gonad.

他以为你说的是“生殖腺”。

(Joey busts out laughing.)

（乔伊大笑起来。）

Opening Credits

片头

Health Inspector

Wow, Monica, if every restaurant is as clean as yours, I'd have a tough time making a living.

哇，莫妮卡，假如每家餐厅都像你这里这么干净，我就失业了。

Monica

Oh, Larry.

哦，拉瑞。

Phoebe

Umm, do health inspectors work on commission?

嗯，卫生督察是挣佣金的吗？

Larry

No, bribes.

不，是拿贿赂。

(Phoebe laughs.)

（菲比笑了。）

Phoebe

It's okay to laugh right?

可以笑吗？

Larry

Yeah, I was just kidding.

可以，我是在开玩笑。

Phoebe

Okay. (She laughs harder.)

好。（她笑得更厉害了。）

Larry

I'll check the kitchen floors.

我去检查厨房地板。

Monica

Okay, knock yourself out, Larry.

请便，拉瑞。

(He goes into the kitchen.)

（他走进厨房。）

Phoebe

Yum-my!

好极了！

Monica

Larry?

拉瑞？

Phoebe

Oh yeah! I'd let him check out my kitchen floors.

哦是啊！我愿意让他检查我的厨房地板。

Larry

(entering) A 98. I deducted 2 points because you are not wearing your chef's hat, and that is a Section 5 violation.

（进来）98分。我扣掉你两分是因为你没戴厨师帽，那是第5条违规。

Monica

Uh, look, Larry honey, umm, I wrote the book on Section 5 and I know that you don't have to wear your hat unless you're in the kitchen.

呃，听着，拉瑞亲爱的，嗯，厨师手册第5条是我写的，我知道只要出了厨房，帽子带不带无所谓。

Larry

And where is your hat?

你的帽子呢？

Monica

It's in the kitchen, I'll go get it.

在厨房里，我去拿。

(She heads for the kitchen door and just after she goes through the door...)

（她走向厨房门，刚走进去……）

Larry

Ahh that's the 2 points.

啊——这两分她丢定了。

Phoebe

Hey, you should really read that book you wrote. (To Larry) Wow! You saw the hat in the kitchen and knew that she'd have to go in there hatless to get it. You can have your own health inspector detective show!

嘿，你自己写的书也不读仔细。（对拉瑞）哇！你看到帽子在厨房里，就知道她进去拿的时候头上会没有帽子。你可以办个卫生督察侦探秀啊！

Larry

Oh, I don't know about that.

哦，这我可说不好。

Phoebe

Yeah, but then I can be you sidekick Vunda.

是啊，那样我就能当你的助手了，我叫芳达。

Larry

Maybe uh, Vunda could give me her number and I can ask her to dinner sometime.

也许……呃，芳达能把她的号码给我，我好请她吃顿饭。

Phoebe

Okay, she would love that! Y'know, 'cause you know all the clean places to eat.

好啊，她一定很高兴！你知道，因为你清楚所有干净的吃饭地方。

Larry

I-I'll call ya.

我……我给你打电话。

Phoebe

Okay.

好。

(Larry goes to leave but heads the wrong way and makes a quick sidestep to go out the right door.)

（拉瑞离开时走错了方向，赶紧侧身从正确的门出去。）

Phoebe

He's so funny! (She imitates what he just did.)

他真有趣！（她模仿他刚才的动作。）

Monica

Thanks.

谢谢。

Rachel

Thank you. (To Monica) Mon?

谢谢。（对莫妮卡）莫？

Monica

Hmm?

嗯？

Rachel

How's Ross doing? Y'know since all the Emily stuff.

罗斯怎么样了？你知道，爱米丽那事以后。

Monica

He's not great umm, but he's dealing with it. Oh wait a minute, you're not gonna try...

他不太好，嗯，不过他能应付。哦等等，你不会是想……

Rachel

Oh, honey, please, no, I can't get started with all that Ross stuff again. I mean, he's gonna screwed up for a looong time. And besides y'know, I don't, I don't go for guys right after they get divorced.

哦，亲爱的，拜托，别乱想，我跟罗斯不可能从头来过了。我是说，他会颓废好一阵子的。另外你知道，我不追刚离婚的男人。

Monica

Right, you only go for them 5 minutes before they get married.

对，你只追快结婚的男人。

(Danny enters.)

（丹尼进来。）

Danny

(To Gunther) Two pounds of Moca Java please.

（对甘瑟）请给我两磅爪哇摩卡咖啡。

Monica

(To Monica) Danny. Are you guys ever gonna go out again?

（对瑞秋）丹尼。你们后来约会过没？

Rachel

I don't know! He hasn't called me since that one time when we went out. I see him in the hallway, we flirt, I'm all ha-ha-ha-ha, and nothing.

不晓得！约会一次后，他就再没给我打过电话。走廊里碰见他，我们眉来眼去，我哈哈哈地笑，然后什么也没发生。

Danny

(To them) Hey!

（对她们）嘿！

Rachel

Hi Danny! (Notices his box of liquor he's carrying.) Wow! Thirsty huh?

嗨丹尼！（注意到他拿的酒箱子）哇，很渴对吧？

Danny

Uh, actually, actually, I'm having a party at my place on Saturday, it's sort of a house warming kind of thing.

呃，其实，我周六在家开派对，算是乔迁之喜吧。

Monica

Ohh, fun!

哦，有趣！

Rachel

Ohh, great!

哦，很棒！

Danny

Yeah, I'm really looking forward to it.

是啊，我很期待。

Rachel

Yeah.

是啊。

Danny

Okay, see ya. (Heads out.)

好了，再见。（离开。）

Monica

Well, I guess we won't be warming his house.

看来他没打算邀我们去暖房。

Rachel

(laughs) Okay. All right, I see what he's doing! He's not asking me out, because he wants me to ask him out.

（笑）好吧。我懂了！他不约我，是想让我约他。

Monica

And you're not gonna do that.

你不会屈尊的哦？

Rachel

That's right! 'Cause that would give him the control! So now he's all ooh, coming up with this whole I've got a party thing y'know, trying to get me to hint around for an invitation. Blew up in his face, didn't it?

当然！那样他就占上风了。所以他借“开派对”为幌子，向我发出邀请的信号——弄巧成拙呀，不是吗？

Monica

So-so there is no party.

所以……根本没有派对？

Rachel

No, there's a party. There's a party. But the power, that is still up for grabs. You follow me?

有，有派对。但是控制权，我们两个都想争取，懂了吗？

Monica

I think so. Se, he-he's not inviting you to his party because he likes you.

我想我懂了。所以，他不邀你参加派对，倒是因为他喜欢你？

Rachel

Exactly.

正确。

Joey

Ross?

罗斯？

Ross

(entering from the bathroom) Hey roomies!

（从浴室出来）嘿，室友！

Chandler

Love what you've done with the place.

我喜欢你把家里搞成这样。

Ross

Oh, yeah I know, I know, it's a lot of boxes, but again I really appreciate you guys letting me stay here.

哦，我知道，箱子是太多了，不过真的很感谢你们收留我。

Joey

Not a problem. And listen, hey! Since you're gonna be here for a while, why don't---I was thinking we uh, put your name on the answering machine.

没问题。对了，嘿！既然你要住一段时间，不如——我在想，我们呃，把你的名字加到电话答录机上吧。

Chandler

Oh yeah!

好呀！

Ross

Oh, I uh, hope you don't mind, I kinda uh, jazzed it up a little. Check this out. (He plays the greeting, and We Will Rock You starts to play and Ross's voice comes over it.) We will, we will, call you back!

哦，我呃，希望你们不介意，我稍微润色了一下。听听。（他播放问候语，《我们将震撼你》响起，罗斯的声音伴着音乐）我们会，我们会，回电话！

Joey

Hey, all right!

嘿，帅！

Ross

Pretty cool, huh?

很酷吧？

(They both laugh as Ross heads back to the bathroom.)

（两人笑着，罗斯回浴室。）

Joey

(To Chandler) You're fake laughing too, right?

（对钱德勒）你也是假笑，对吧？

Chandler

Oh, the tears are real.

哦，笑假泪真。

Larry

You look beautiful this evening.

你今晚很美。

Phoebe

(smiles) Show me the badge again.

（微笑）再给我看看徽章嘛。

(He looks around and flashes her his badge and she laughs.)

（他环顾四周，向她亮出徽章，她笑了。）

Phoebe

Shiny.

炫！

Larry

Oh, will you mind if I wash up? Because I came straight from work and who knows where these babies (Holds up his hands) have been.

哦，我去洗手，你不介意吧？我下班直接过来的，这双手（举起手）不知摸过哪里呢。

Phoebe

(laughing) You are just nonstop!

（笑）你真是职业病！

(He goes to the bathroom and Phoebe puts some pepper and salt on her food. With the salt she takes a bit and throws it over her left shoulder as she faces us.)

（他去洗手间，菲比在食物上撒了些胡椒和盐。她捏了一点盐，朝左肩后方扔去。）

Larry

(coming back) We're outta here!

（回来）我们走！

Phoebe

Why?!

为什么？

Larry

Just walking past the kitchen I saw 10 violations! I'm shutting this place down!

经过厨房时，我看到了10个违例！我要把这地方关掉！

Phoebe

(awed) You have the power to do that?

（敬畏地）你有这么大的权利？

Larry

This does. (Shows her his badge.)

这个有。（给她看徽章。）

Phoebe

(excited) Shut it down.

（兴奋地）关了这家餐厅！

Joey

Hey.

嘿。

Chandler

What are you doing?

你在做什么？

Joey

Nothing.

没。

Chandler

You built a fort didn't ya?

你在建堡垒，对吧？

Joey

(smiles) Kinda.

（笑）差不多吧。

Chandler

(notices something) Oh my God, the air purifier! Ross's air purifier! All I heard through 4 years of college was (makes a humming noise.)

（注意到什么）我的天！罗斯的空气净化机！大学四年，我一直听它嗡嗡嗡。

Joey

Dude, you should've gone out once and a while.

老兄，你该时不时出去溜达溜达。

Chandler

I hate this thing!

我讨厌这玩意儿！

Joey

Come on, Chandler, Ross is our friend. He needs us right now, so why don't you be a grown up and come and watch some TV in the fort!

拜托，钱德勒，罗斯是我们的朋友。他现在很需要我们。成熟一点，来，到堡垒里看电视。

Rachel

Oh, hi Danny.

哦，嗨，丹尼。

Danny

Hey guys, I just uh, wanted to invite you to the party tomorrow night.

嘿，姑娘们，我只是呃，想邀请你们参加明晚的派对。

Monica

Oh, thanks! We'll try to stop by.

哦，谢谢！我们会尽量过去的。

Rachel

Uh, actually, I think I'm gonna be busy.

呃，其实我可能很忙。

Monica

You are?

是吗？

Rachel

Yeah! Remember I got that uh, gala.

是啊！记得我有个……呃，盛会吗？

Danny

Yeah, what's the gala for?

是什么盛会？

Rachel

It's a uh, regatta gala.

是个……呃，赛舟会。

Danny

Really! You-you sail?

真的！你……你会划船？

Rachel

No-no, but I support it.

不不，但我支持它。

Danny

Okay, (To Monica) hope I see you tomorrow night.

好吧，（对莫妮卡）希望明晚见到你。

Monica

Okay.

好。

Danny

Take care. (Leaves.)

保重。（离开。）

Rachel

Okay. (Closes the door.) Walked right into that one didn't he?

好了。（关门。）他果然用这招对吧？

Monica

What one? You wanted him to invite you to the party and he did it!

哪一招？你不是想让他邀你去派对吗，他做到了！

Rachel

Yeah, but he waited until the last minute! So if I said yes, he would know I had nothing better to do than wait around for an invitation to his stupid party. I said, "No!" Which puts me right back in the driver seat.

是啊，但他最后一刻才邀我。所以我要是答应，他会知道我除了等他的邀请以外再无事可做。我说“不！”这让我争回了上风。

Monica

Great. So the ball is in his court?

好极了，这下该他接球了？

Rachel

Ball? There is no ball.

球？哪来什么球。

Ross

(glaring at him) Joey, please! (Motions to his computer.)

（瞪着他）乔伊，拜托！（指指电脑。）

Joey

Sorry.

抱歉。

(Joey starts playing with a toy alligator and has it attack him.)

（乔伊开始玩玩具鳄鱼，让它攻击自己。）

Joey

Ahhhhhhhhhh...

啊啊啊啊啊……

(Notices Ross looking at him and stops. Ross gives him his 'quiet down' maneuver.)

（注意到罗斯在看他，停下来。罗斯对他做了个“安静”的手势。）

(Joey then explains the maneuver to the audience: Okay, this may take a while to explain, so center this on your screen and place your hands about a foot apart with your fingers together and pointing straight up. Now take your fingers and point them at the other hand and making a 90-degree angle with each of your hands and the first knuckle counting up from the wrist. Now take your right hand, no your other right (that was for the dyslexics), and lower it a couple of inches, so that the fingers are pointing at your wrist. Now take your arms and keeping the elbows bent and your hands in front of you spread out your arms, kinda like making a bird's wing. Now hunch your shoulders over and move your hands up and down as if you are trying to tell someone to turn it down. That's Ross' 'quiet down' maneuver. Well, there is an accompanying face, but I don't want to try and describe it as well.)

好吧，这可能需要解释一会儿，请把屏幕中心对准，双手分开约一英尺，手指并拢向上指。然后把手指指向另一只手，每只手与第一指关节成90度角，从手腕算起。现在用你的右手——不，另一只右手（这是给阅读障碍者听的），降低几英寸，让手指指向手腕。然后保持肘部弯曲，双手在身前张开，像鸟的翅膀。接着耸起肩膀，上下移动双手，好像在告诉某人把音量调小。这就是罗斯的“安静”手势。还配有一个表情，我就不描述了。）

Chandler

(entering) Hello children!

（进来）孩子们好！

Joey

Hey! Wanna play some foosball? Please?

嘿！来玩足球机吧？拜托？

Chandler

Okay. (Starts to head for where the foosball table usually is.)

好。（朝通常放足球机的地方走去。）

Joey

No-no, no! We have to move the table into my room, yeah! 'Cause of all the boxes. Come on!

不不不！得把桌子搬到我房间，对！因为这些箱子。来吧！

(They go into his bedroom.)

（他们走进他的卧室。）

Joey

All right, I have one question. What is the deal with this? (Imitates Ross's 'quiet down' maneuver, but does not move his hands up and down; he just flaps his hands as if he's waving good-bye.)

好吧，我有个问题。这手势啥意思？（模仿罗斯的“安静”手势，但没有上下移动，只是像挥手再见那样摆动。）

Chandler

Bye-bye little puppet Joey hand?

再见，小木偶乔伊的手？

Joey

No, the quiet down thing!

不，是让我静一静的那个！

Chandler

You mean this. (Does the maneuver perfectly.)

你是说这个。（完美地做出手势。）

Joey

Um-hmm! Look, I-I-I don't know how much more of this I can take! Did you know he taped over my Baywatch tape with some show about bugs! My God! What if that had been porn?

嗯哼！听着，我……我不知道我还能忍受多久。你知道吗，他用一个关于虫子的节目录掉了我的《海滩救生队》录像带！我的天！要是色情片呢？

Chandler

(gasps) All right look, y'know, this may be tough but come on, this is Ross! I survived college with him!

（倒吸一口气）好吧听着，这也许是挺难的，不过拜托，这可是罗斯！我和他大学时代都忍过来了。

Joey

All right, I guess I can hold out a little longer. Let's have a game.

好吧，我想我还能再忍忍。我们玩吧。

Chandler

Okay.

好。

(They start playing.)

（他们开始玩。）

Chandler

No-no-no-no!

不！不！不！不！

Joey

YES!!

进了！

Ross

(entering) Uh fellas, (Does the maneuver and gives them a double thumbs up, which Chandler returns as he closes the door.)

（进来）呃，伙计们，（做手势并竖起双拇指，钱德勒关门时回敬了这个手势。）

Chandler

Okay, so he's out of here.

好了，他得搬走。

Joey

Um-hmm.

嗯哼。

Commercial Break

广告时间

Joey

(entering) Hey!

（进来）嘿！

Monica

Hey!

嘿！

Joey

You guys got anything to eat? I just went down to Johnos for some chicken and it was closed!

你们有吃的吗？我刚去Johnos买鸡，那里关门了！

Phoebe

Oh, I took Larry there to eat but it was all violated. So we shut it down!

哦，我带拉瑞去那里吃饭，但那里违规了。所以我们就勒令停业了！

Joey

Pheebs, if this guy keeps closing down all of our favorite places, where are we gonna eat?!

菲比斯，要是这家伙一直关掉我们最喜欢的馆子，我们上哪儿吃饭？

Monica

I don't know, clean places?

我不知道，干净的地方？

Joey

Umm, yum!

嗯，也好！

(There's a knock on the door and Monica answers it.)

（有人敲门，莫妮卡去开。）

Monica

(looking through the peephole) It's Danny.

（从猫眼看）是丹尼。

Rachel

Don't let him in! I'm supposed to be at a regatta gala.

别让他进来！我现在应该在赛舟会上。

Monica

(to Danny) We'll be right there! (To Rachel) Can't you just say it starts later?

（对丹尼）我们马上过来！（对瑞秋）你就不能说赛舟会晚点举行吗？

Rachel

What? What kind of a regatta gala starts at night?!

什么？什么赛舟会在晚上举行？

Monica

The fake kind!

无中生有那种！

(She opens the door and Rachel hides behind it.)

（她开门，瑞秋躲在门后。）

Danny

Hey, hi, I need a ladle. You got a ladle?

嘿，嗨，我需要一个杓子。你们有吗？

Monica

We have a ladle. (Gives him one.)

我们有。（给她一个。）

Danny

Thanks, see you at the party.

谢谢，派对上见。

Monica

Okay, great!

好的，太好了！

(He leaves and she closes the door.)

（他离开，她关上门。）

Phoebe

Hey, guys, you know what Larry would say? He would say, "See you ladle." (Laughs.)

“勺子再见。”（笑。）

Chandler

Well, I-I-I'm done with this. You want anything Ross? Sports? International? Apartment listings?

嗯，我看完了。你要什么吗，罗斯？体育版？国际版？公寓出租版？

Ross

I'll take sports.

我要体育版。

Joey

Mine! (He grabs it.)

我的！（他抢过来。）

Ross

All right. Uhh, international.

好吧。呃，国际版。

Joey

Oh that's mine too! (Grabs it and Ross looks at him.) I'm Italian!

那也是我的！（抢过来，罗斯看着他。）我是意大利人！

Ross

Well, I guess I can check out those apartment listings, even though there's never anything in here.

好吧，我看公寓出租版吧，不过这版从来就没什么好看的。

Chandler

Not even on page 7?

第7页呢？

Ross

(looks) Oh yeah! You're---hey, you're right! Here's an affordable place, (reading ad) two bedroom, close to work, ooh, it's available in five weeks!

（看）哦对！你……嘿，你说得对！这有个价钱挺合适的，（读广告）两个睡房，离工作地点近，哦，五星期后出租。

Chandler

What about that circled one?

圈上的那处呢？

Ross

Oh, I-I don't know, it's kind of expensive for a studio.

哦，我不……不知道，当工作室有点贵了。

Joey

But it's available now! Isn't it?

但可以马上入住！不是吗？

Chandler

Yes, it is.

对。

Joey

Hey, let's go look at it! (They both jump up.)

嘿，我们马上去看房！（两人都跳起来。）

Ross

Okay, let's go.

好，走吧。

Joey

Okay!

好！

Chandler

There we go!

走吧！

Ross

Oh-oh-ooh, hey guys, I was wondering if you guys would uh, maybe chip in on some new air filters for the air purifier? I mean after all, we all are using it.

哦——嘿，伙计们，我想问你们能不能呃，凑点钱给空气净化机买新过滤器？毕竟我们都用嘛。

Chandler

Let's go quicker.

“快”走！

Joey

Yeah!

好！

Ross

Oh my God! (Looking around, which doesn't take him long.)

我的天！（环顾四周，没花多长时间。）

Chandler

Yeah, well look at this kitchen, slash bathroom. Well that's great! Y'know so you can cook while in the tub.

是啊，你看这个厨房兼浴室。太好了！你在浴缸里都能煮饭。

Joey

Somebody was using his head. Hey, let's check out the rest of the place.

有人动心了。嘿，我们去看看其他地方。

(They don't move, just look all around them.)

（他们没动，只是四处看了看。）

Ross

I think this is it. I don't know, maybe we should keep looking.

就这样吧。我不知道，也许我们接着找吧。

Joey

But hey, Ross, this place is available now!

但是嘿，罗斯，这地方现在就能入住！

Chandler

Yeah, you don't want to be stuck with us for the next five weeks.

是啊，你也不希望再跟我们挤五个星期吧。

Joey

Yeah.

是啊。

(He looks at them.)

（他看着他们。）

Ross

(To Joey) So, you-you think I should go ahead and take this place?

（对乔伊）所以，你……你觉得我应该租这里？

Joey

Oh, it's perfect!

哦，完美！

Ross

(To Chandler) How about you?

（对钱德勒）你呢？

Chandler

It's a kitchen slash bathroom.

厨房兼浴室。

Ross

All right, I see what you guys are saying. I'll uh, I'll go downstairs and fill out an application.

好吧，我明白你们的意思了。我呃，我下楼去填表。

(He exits.)

（他离开。）

Chandler

We are bad people.

我们是坏人。

Joey

He knew we were trying to get rid of him. He knew! (Pause.) You think we could get a bathtub in our kitchen?

他知道我们要赶走他了。他知道！（停顿）你觉得我们能在厨房里也摆个浴缸吗？

Larry

(entering) Hey, ready for dinner?

（进来）嘿，准备好去吃饭了吗？

Phoebe

Ooh, absolutely!

哦，当然！

Larry

Great! How about you wanted to go the Italian place down on Bleaker Street right?

好极了！你想去比克街的那家意大利餐厅，对吧？

Phoebe

Ooh, I love that place! (Thinks about it.) So, no.

哦，我喜欢那家！（想了想）所以，还是算了。

Larry

How about Mama Lisettie's?

那去Mama Lisettie's呢？

Phoebe

Enh. Sure!

嗯。好呀！

Larry

(notices something) I wonder how long that milk (on the counter) has been setting out.

（注意到什么）我想知道那牛奶（在柜台上）摆多久了。

Phoebe

Oh, no-no, this place is totally healthy! That---this milk is mine. I bought this today, 'cause I was thirsty for milk, y'know. (She takes a swig of it, but has to turn away from him as she makes a face to show that it has gone bad.) Okay, let's go!

哦，不不，这地方非常卫生！那……这牛奶是我的。我今天买的，因为我渴了想喝牛奶，你知道。（她喝了一大口，但不得不转过身去，做了个鬼脸表明牛奶坏了。）好了，走吧！

(Just as they're about to leave, Gunther comes out of the back carrying two garbage bags. Larry sees this and stops him.)

（就在他们准备离开时，甘瑟从后面出来，提着两袋垃圾。拉瑞看见了，拦住他。）

Larry

Hey, buddy! (Flashes his badge.) Are you familiar with Section 11-B of the Health Code that requires all refuse material out the back exit?

嘿，伙计！（亮徽章。）卫生条例第11条第2点规定，倒垃圾必须从后门走，你不知道吗？

Gunther

But then I'd have to go all the way around the dry cleaner place.

那我就得从干洗部绕过去。

Larry

Oh, so you're saying you'd choose convenience over health?!

哦，所以你是说贪方便不顾卫生？

Phoebe

Okay, stop! Larry, okay, can't you just be Larry and not Larry the health inspector guy? Y'know I mean it was really exciting at first but now it's like, okay, so where are we gonna eat ever?

好了，住手！拉瑞，你能不能就做拉瑞，别做卫生督察拉瑞？你知道，开始还觉得到处查封馆子挺刺激的，但现在……好吧，我们以后上哪儿吃饭？

Larry

Well, I suppose I could give him a warning.

嗯，我想我可以给他个警告。

Phoebe

Thank you. (To Gunther, who's standing there frozen) Okay, go! Go! Go! (He runs off.) (To Larry) Now, if after dinner you still really need to bust someone, I know a hot dog vendor who picks his nose.

谢谢。（对僵站在那里的甘瑟）好了，快走！快走！快走！（他跑掉。）（对拉瑞）如果饭后你还想抓人，我知道有个卖热狗的家伙爱挖鼻孔。

Joey

Maybe, maybe we did a good thing, helping Ross get back on his feet!

也许，也许我们干了件好事，帮助罗斯独立！

Chandler

Yes that was a nice place!

是啊，那地方不错！

Joey

Yeah!

对！

Chandler

Not a lot of closet space, but he can just hang his stuff out the window in a bag!

虽然没多少壁橱空间，但他可以把东西装袋挂在窗外。

Joey

Yeah!

是啊！

(Pause.)

（停顿。）

Chandler

What are we gonna do?

我们该怎么办？

Joey

I don't know. Maybe pizza?

我不知道。要不吃比萨？

Chandler

About Ross!

是说罗斯的问题！

Joey

Oh! Oh!

哦！哦！

(The phone rings and Joey answers it.)

（电话铃响，乔伊接起。）

Joey

Hello! (Listens.) Oh yeah! (To Chandler) It's the apartment manager; Ross put us down as references. (To the apartment manager.) Ross is the greatest guy you'll ever meet! Yeah, he's very reliable.

喂！（听）哦对！（对钱德勒）是那个公寓的管理处打来的，罗斯填表时证明人一栏写的我们俩。（对公寓管理员）罗斯是你见过的最好的人！对，他很可靠。

Chandler

(grabbing the phone) Of course he has this big huge dog! That uh, barks into the night. (Listens.) Well, who doesn't love dogs? (Thinks.) Ah, he's a tap dancer! (Listens.) Yes, some would say that is a lost art. (Thinks.) He's a pimp! (Listens.) There you go! Yes, he's a pimp. He's a big, tap dancing pimp!

（抢过电话）当然他养了只大狗，很大，一直吠到深夜。（听）哎，谁不爱狗呢？（想了想）啊，他还是个踢踏舞者！（听）对，有人会认为那是过时的艺术。（想了想）他还是个皮条客！（听）对啦！对，他是个皮条客。他是个高大的、跳踢踏舞的皮条客！

(Pause. The apartment manager hung up on him and he hangs up the phone and throws in on the chair. Joey motions, "What the hell was that?" Chandler makes a face to say, "Think about it." Joey tries to divide 136 by 13; he's confused. Suddenly, light dawns on yonder dunder head. He gets it.)

“想想看。”乔伊试着用136除以13，很困惑。突然，这个笨蛋恍然大悟。他明白了。）

Chandler

Ohhhhh!

哦——！

(Joey motions, "Now, that's thinking!")

“这才叫动脑子！”）

Rachel

Shoot, shoot, this is never gonna work! He's right there!

糟糕，糟糕，这法子行不通！他就在那儿！

Monica

Just go over and say hi.

走过去打个招呼就行了。

Rachel

No, I have to go downstairs and come back up as if I'm coming home from the regatta gala. Okay? So just go distract him. But don't be sexy.

不，我得下楼再上来，假装刚从赛舟会回家。行吗？所以你去引开他，但别太骚。

(Monica obeys.)

（莫妮卡照做。）

Monica

Hey, Danny!

嘿，丹尼！

Danny

Hey! What's going on?

嘿！怎么了？

Monica

(turns his back to the stairs) Oh, it's a great party! Great food. Y'know, most parties it's all chips and salsa, chips and salsa. (As she's saying this Rachel tries to head downstairs but is blocked by people coming upstairs. She quickly retreats back up the stairs.) (Sees that she has to keep him distracted longer.) So umm, what's this? (Points to his plate.)

（让他背对楼梯）哦，派对很棒！食物可口。你知道，大多派对都只有薯片和沙拉，薯片和沙拉。（她说这话时，瑞秋想下楼，但被上楼的人挡住，她赶紧退回楼上。）（意识到必须让他分心更久。）所以嗯，这是什么？（指着他的盘子。）

Danny

Salad.

沙拉。

Monica

Ooooh! (Rachel now succeeds in getting downstairs.) And-and-and what-what's this? (Points again.)

哦——！（瑞秋现在成功下楼。）还有——还有，这……这是什么？（又指。）

Danny

Bread. Aren't you a chef?

面包。你不是厨师吗？

(Rachel returns.)

（瑞秋回来。）

Monica

(upon seeing Rachel she points) Oh.

（看到瑞秋，指了指）哦。

Danny

Hey! Rachel!

嘿！瑞秋！

Rachel

Hey! Oh right, tonight was your party.

嘿！哦对了，今晚是你的派对。

Danny

Oh wow, you look great! Glad you could make it.

哦哇，你看起来不错！真高兴你能来。

Rachel

Oh well, y'know, the gala had to end sometime.

哦，你知道，赛艇会总要结束的。

Danny

Don't go anywhere, I'll be right back. (He heads off.)

别走开，我很快回来。（他走开。）

Rachel

Yeah, sure. (To Monica) All right, whose court is the ball in now?

好的，当然。（对莫妮卡）好了，现在球在哪一边了？

Monica

I thought there wasn't a ball?

你不是说没有球吗？

Rachel

Oh, come on! He's glad that I came, he doesn't want me to go anywhere, balls flying all over the place!

哦，得了！他很高兴我来了，他还叫我别走开，球到处乱飞！

Danny

(returning, with a friend) Rachel, this is my friend Tom. (To Tom) This is the girl I told you about.

（带一个朋友回来）瑞秋，这是我朋友汤姆。（对汤姆）这就是我跟你提过的女孩。

Rachel

Oh, go on! You telling people about me?

哦，是吗！你还跟别人提起我呢？

Danny

You two could really hit it off! I'm gonna go mingle. (Leaves.)

你们俩一定能一拍即合！我去应酬一下。（离开。）

Tom

So you work at Bloomingdale's, huh? My mom calls it Bloomies.

你在布鲁明戴尔上班？我妈妈管那里叫“Bloomies”。

Rachel

(laughs) Yeah, okay, at ease soldier!

（笑）好了，稍息，战士！

Tom

I'm sorry?

什么？

Rachel

No, it's all right, you can just drop the act Tommy. I know what's going on here. You're Danny's wingman right? You guys are best buds. Frat bros!

别装了，汤米，我全明白。你是丹尼的舵手，对吧？你们是最铁的哥们，死党！

Tom

I'm gonna go talk to uh, a friend.

我去跟呃……一个朋友聊聊。

Rachel

Yeah, yeah, you go talk to your friend. You tell him, "Nice try."

去吧去吧，你去跟你的朋友谈吧。跟他说“做得不错”。

(He walks off.)

（他走开。）

Rachel

Man! He just keeps lobbing them up and I just keep knocking them right out of the park!

天啊！他不断来球，我就一个接一个打出全垒打！

Monica

I think I need a drink.

我想喝一杯。

Rachel

Yeah!

好！

(They go get a drink.)

（她们去拿饮料。）

Chandler

98. 99. 100. Okay, go!

98，99，100。好了，走吧！

Joey

(getting up) Dude, I'm telling ya! I'm fine! (He tries to take a step and falls flat on his face.)

（站起来）老兄，我跟你说，我好得很！（试着迈步，结果脸朝下摔倒了。）

(He tries to get up again and starts falling backwards and Chandler catches him.)

（他再试着站起来，开始往后倒，钱德勒接住了他。）

Chandler

Here we go! Here we go!

来来来！

(Ross enters.)

（罗斯进来。）

Joey

Hey!

嘿！

Chandler

Hey!

嘿！

Ross

Hey. So I uh, I didn't get that apartment. Some problem with my application.

嘿。我呃，没租到那套公寓。申请表有点问题。

Joey

You're kidding!

开玩笑吧！

Chandler

You're kidding, no!

不是吧，别开玩笑！

Ross

Yeah. But, the good news is that Phoebe said that I could stay at her place for a while. So...

是啊。不过好消息是菲比说我可以到她那儿暂住。所以……

Joey

But you can't stay with Phoebe, Ross! We're-we're roomies!

但你不能跟菲比一起住，罗斯！我们是室友！

Ross

Look, you guys don't need me here taking up your space.

听着，你们不需要我在这儿占你们的地方。

Joey

Well, we got plenty of space! There-there's still some over there (Points to where the window is but sees that there isn't any space there and points towards his door.) by-by that speaker. Please, just stay!

我们地方够大！那边……那边还有点儿空（指向窗户方向，但发现根本没空，又转向他的房门）在……在那个音响旁边。求你了，留下来吧！

Chandler

Yeah!

对！

Ross

Are you guys sure about this?

你们确定吗？

Joey

Definitely!

确定！

Chandler

Yes! Ross, you have to stay!

对！罗斯，你得留下！

Ross

All right.

好吧。

Joey

All right!

太好了！

Chandler

All right, buddy!

太好了，哥们！

Ross

So I'm a pimp huh? It's okay! Look, I know that sometimes I can be a pain in the ass, but you just have to talk to me. Tell me if something is bothering you. Okay? And for my part I will do everything I can to keep my annoying habits just (Does the 'quiet down' maneuver).

所以我是个皮条客，是吧？没关系！听着，我知道有时候我很讨人嫌，但你们只要跟我谈谈就行了。告诉我有什么让你们烦的，好吗？至于我，我会尽一切努力收敛我的坏习惯，就这样（做“安静”手势）。

(Chandler and Joey smile, but when Ross turns away look at each other with looks of horror.)

（钱德勒和乔伊微笑，但罗斯一转身，两人惊恐地对视。）

Ending Credits

片尾字幕

Chandler

Well, I see you've had a very productive day. Don't you think the cowboy hat is a little much?

看来你今天收获不小啊。你不觉得牛仔帽有点太过分？

Ross

(popping up behind Joey wearing an Indian headdress) Come on, it's fun!

（从乔伊身后冒出来，戴着印第安头饰）来嘛，很好玩的！

Chandler

All right! (He joins them in the fort and comes up putting on a bonnet.) Isn't this a woman's hat?

好吧！（他加入堡垒，戴上一顶软帽。）这不是女人的帽子吗？

Joey

Dude, stop talking crazy and make us some tea!

伙计，别说废话了，给我们来点茶吧！

(Chandler does so.)

（钱德勒照做。）

End

结束