The One With All the Kips

Monica

(quietly) Hi!

（轻声）嗨！

Chandler

(quietly) Hi! (They both start kissing.)

（轻声）嗨！（两人开始接吻）

(Joey enters and Chandler pushes her away.)

（乔伊走进来，钱德把她推开）

Joey

Monica? What time is it?

莫妮卡？几点了？

Chandler

Uhh, 9. (He pushes the clock into the sink.)

呃，早上9点。（他把钟推进水槽里）

Joey

But it's dark out.

可是外面很黑。

Monica

Well that's because you always sleep to noon, silly! This is what 9 looks like.

你总是一觉睡到中午，小笨蛋！9点钟就是这么黑！

Joey

I guess I'll get washed up then. Watch that sunrise. (He goes into the bathroom.)

那我先去洗漱，准备看日出。（他走进浴室）

Monica

I'm really getting tired of sneaking around.

我厌倦了这样偷偷摸摸！

Chandler

I know, me too. Hey! Y'know what if we went away for a whole weekend? Y'know we'd have no interruptions and we could be naked the entire time.

我也是。嘿！我们出去度周末怎样？没人骚扰我们，整个周末都可以赤身裸体。

Monica

All weekend? That's a whole lotta naked.

整个周末？暴露个够。

Chandler

Yeah, I can say that I have a conference and you can say you have a chef thing.

我就说去开会，你也用工作来搪塞。

Monica

Ohh, I've always wanted to go to this culinary fair that they have in Jersey!

哦，我对泽西州举办的烹饪盛会向往已久！

Chandler

Okay, y'know you're not though. Let's go. (He starts for his bedroom.)

好了，别忘了这是借口。走吧。（他朝卧室走去）

Monica

Wait! What about Joey?

等等！乔伊呢？

(Chandler opens the bathroom door to reveal Joey passed out on the toilet with a toothbrush in his mouth.)

（钱德打开浴室门，露出乔伊嘴里含着牙刷、在马桶上睡着的样子）

Opening Credits

片头

Monica

(entering from her room) Hey, guess what I'm doing this weekend! I'm going to this culinary fair in New Jersey.

（从她的房间出来）嘿，猜猜我这个周末干嘛？我要去新泽西州参加烹饪盛会。

Phoebe

Oh weird, Chandler just told us he's got a conference there!

哦，怪哉！钱德刚说他要到那儿开会！

Monica

Oh now that-that-that's funny, it seems like Chandler's conference could've been in Connecticut or Vermont.

有趣。怎么钱德的会议不到其他州开？

Chandler

I'm not in charge of where the conference is held. Do you want people to think it's a fake conference? It's a real conference.

会议地点又不是我决定。你以为开会是戏言？是真有其事。

Ross

(entering) Hey.

（走进来）嘿。

Joey

Hey!

嘿！

Monica

Hey.

嘿。

Ross

Is Rachel here? I gotta talk to her.

瑞秋在吗？我得跟她谈谈。

Monica

No, she's out shopping.

她出去买东西了。

Ross

Damn!

糟了！

Chandler

What's going on?

此话怎讲？

Ross

I told Emily to come. And I just need to y'know, talk to Rachel about it.

我约了爱米丽过来，所以请你们通知瑞秋一声。

Phoebe

Wait a minute! So when Emily comes you're just, you're not gonna see Rachel anymore?

等等！就是说，爱米丽来了，你就不再见瑞秋了？

Ross

Well look, I'm just trying to focus on the "I get to see my wife," part, all right? And not the part that makes me do this. (He takes a big swig of Pepto Bismol.)

我只想专心恭候老婆大驾，而不想大吃胃药！

Monica

Wow, so you guys are, you're never gonna be in the same room together? How is that even gonna work?

那你们再也不能共处一室？怎么可能？

Ross

I have no idea. I mean... But-but I assure you I will figure it out.

我不知道，但我一定能想出对策。

(They all reflect briefly on what was said.)

（大家都沉思了一会儿）

Joey

Doesn't seem like it's going to work, I mean...

这样肯定不行，我是说……

Rachel

(entering) Hi, guys!

（走进来）嗨，各位！

Joey

Hi!

嗨！

Chandler

Uh, hey!

呃，嘿！

Rachel

What's going on?

怎么了？

Chandler

We're flipping Monica's mattress.

我们要帮莫妮卡拍床垫。

Joey

So I'm thinking, basically we pick it up and then we flip it.

我们要把床垫抬起来拍一拍。

Phoebe

Yeah that's better than my way.

比我的做法高明。

(They all agree and head to Monica's room.)

（他们都同意，朝莫妮卡的房间走去）

Rachel

Oh okay, hey guys, would you flip mine too?

好，把我的也拍拍吧。

Chandler

Aww, man! (They go into Monica's room.)

天啊！（他们走进莫妮卡的房间）

Rachel

(going through the mail) Oh look! A letter from my mom.

（翻邮件）哦，看！我妈的信。

Ross

So, Rach, y'know-y'know how Emily's coming right?

瑞秋，你知道爱米丽要来了对吧？

Rachel

Oh yeah! I know.

对，我知道。

Phoebe

(To Chandler) Can you hear anything?

（对钱德）能听到吗？

Chandler

Oh yes, somebody just said, "Can you hear anything?"

对，有人说“能听到吗？”

(Joey is bent over at the waist and is looking for something under Monica's bed.)

（乔伊弯着腰在莫妮卡的床下找东西）

Monica

Hey, Joey's ass! What are you doing?

嘿，乔伊的屁股！你干什么？

Joey

(holding a box) Well, remember when they got in that big fight and broke up and we were all stuck in here with no food or anything? Well, when Ross said Rachel at the wedding, I figured it was gonna happen again, so I hid this in here.

（拿着一个盒子）记得上次，他们大吵一架分手，我们困在这里，整晚没有食物和补给。当罗斯在婚礼上说漏嘴，我就知道悲剧又将重演了，所以我做好了准备。

Monica

Ooh, candy bars, crossword puzzles...

糖果条，纵横字谜……

Phoebe

Ooh, Madlibs, mine! (Grabs it.)

Madlibs游戏！我要！（抢过来）

Chandler

Condoms?

避孕套？

Joey

You don't know how long we're gonna be in here! We may have to repopulate the Earth.

谁知道我们会困多久！说不定得在这里繁衍后代。

Chandler

And condoms are the way to do that?

避孕套可以帮助繁衍后代？

Ross

Anyway it-it kinda-it all boils down to this, the last time I talked to Emily...

所以，结论就是，上次我跟爱米丽谈到——

Rachel

(interrupting) Oh my God! My dog died!

（打断）天啊！我的狗死了！

Ross

What?!

什么？！

Rachel

Oh my God, Le Poo, our dog!

天啊！拉普，我家的狗！

Ross

Le Poo's still alive?!

拉普才刚死？

Rachel

Oh God, it says he was hit by an ice cream truck and dragged for nine-(turns over the note)-teen blocks. Oh. (They all come out from Monica's bedroom) Oh my God.

上面说，他被一辆雪糕车撞倒，然后被拖了九——（翻过信纸）——十九个街区！天啊。（大家都从莫妮卡的卧室出来）天啊！

Monica

Sweetie, we heard you crying. Please don't cry.

亲爱的，我们听到你哭。别难过。

Rachel

It's Le Poo.

是拉普出事了。

Phoebe

I know it's le poo right now, but it'll get better.

知道你是哭拉普的死，精彩的还在后面。

Chandler

(jumping on the bed) I can't believe it! We're here!

（在床上跳）做梦一样！我们溜出来啦！

Monica

Ooh, chocolates on the pillows! I love that!

枕头上有巧克力！我喜欢！

Chandler

Oh, you should live with Joey, Roll-os everywhere.

你该跟乔伊同住，到处都有巧克力。

Monica

Come here. (He does, and they kiss.) Okay, be right back.

过来。（他过来，两人接吻）好，我去去就来。

(Goes to the bathroom and Chandler turns on the TV and finds a high-speed police chase.)

（她去浴室，钱德打开电视，发现正在播警匪高速追车）

Chandler

Oh yes! Monica, get in here! There's a high-speed car chase on!

好耶！莫妮卡快来！警匪追车！

(Monica returns, carrying a glass.)

（莫妮卡拿着一个杯子回来）

Monica

We're switching rooms.

我们要换房。

Chandler

(looks at what she's holding and shies away) Oh dear God, they gave us glasses!

（看到她手里的东西，避开了）天啊！杯子！

Monica

No, they gave us glasses with lipstick on them! I mean, if they didn't change the glasses, who knows what else they didn't change. (He glares at her.) Come on sweetie, I just want this weekend to be perfect, I mean we can change rooms, can't we?

杯子有唇膏印子！他们连杯子都没换，其他用品更不会换了。（他瞪着她）亲爱的，我只希望这个周末完美无缺。我们换房，好吗？

Chandler

Okay, but let's do it now though, because Chopper 5 just lost its feed! (He grabs their bags and sprints out.)

要换就赶快，他们刚刚减速。（他抓起行李冲了出去）

Ross

Hey, so uh, y'know how there's something I wanted to talk to you about?

嘿，你知道我想跟你谈什么吗？

Rachel

Oh yeah! (Turns to face him.)

哦，知道！（转过身来面对他）

Ross

Well, y'know how I'm trying to work things out with Emily. Well, there's this one thing... Okay, (Rachel has her back turned to the camera, and Ross isn't looking at her.) here goes. I made a promise that-(they cut to the other camera and Ross notices something coming out of Rachel's nose)-Oh hey!

你知道我一直想跟爱米丽重修旧好。所以有件事——（瑞秋背对镜头，罗斯没看她）我允诺她——（镜头切换，罗斯发现瑞秋鼻子里有东西）嘿！

Rachel

What?

什么？

Ross

You're nose is bleeding!

你流鼻血！

Rachel

Oh God. (He hands her some tissues.) No! Oh not again! (Wiping her nose.) This-this happened when my grandfather died. It's ugh! Sorry. (She puts her head back.) Oh, okay, so I'm sorry, what-what were you-what did you want to tell me?

天！（他递给她纸巾）不！又来了！（擦鼻子）我祖父去世时我流过鼻血。抱歉。（她仰起头）抱歉。你刚才跟我说什么来着？

Ross

Umm... (Rachel blows her nose.)

嗯……（瑞秋擤鼻子）

Rachel

Sorry. Sorry.

抱歉。抱歉。

Ross

Okay, I uh, I can't see you anymore.

我不能再见你了。

Rachel

Yeah, I know. It's ridiculous! I can't see you either.

真扯，我也看不见你了。

Hotel Clerk

I think you'll find this room more to your liking.

你们会满意这间房的。

Chandler

Okay, great. (He grabs the remote and turns on the TV to the chase.)

好，太好了。（他拿起遥控器，打开追车画面）

Hotel Clerk

(watching the chase) They say he's only got half a tank left.

（看着追车）据说他只剩一半的油了。

Chandler

Half a tank? We still got a lot of high-speed chasing to do!

一半？那还有得看！

Monica

We're switching rooms again.

我们要再换房！

Chandler

What? Why?

什么？为什么？

Monica

This is a garden view room, and we paid for an ocean view room.

这是花园景观，我们付钱看海景的。

Hotel Clerk

Our last ocean view room was unacceptable to you.

我们最后一间海景房已经被你换掉了。

Monica

(To Chandler) Excuse me, umm, can I talk to you over here for just a second?

（对钱德）抱歉。我能跟你谈谈吗？

Chandler

Uh-huh. (He doesn't take his eyes off the TV.)

嗯。（眼睛没离开电视）

Monica

Chandler!

钱德！

Chandler

(turning to face her) Yeah.

（转向她）嗯。

Monica

Look, these clowns are trying to take us for a ride and I'm not gonna let 'em! And we're not a couple of suckers!

这些小丑想糊弄我们，我才不会上当！我们又不是一对小孩！

Chandler

I hear ya, Mugsy! But look, all these rooms are fine okay? Can you just pick one so I can watch-(realizes)-have a perfect, magical weekend together with you.

知道了，哪间房都好——只要挑一间，让我看——（意识到）——让我跟你共度美妙周末。

Monica

Okay, this one I like!

这间我喜欢！

Chandler

(watching TV, in fact, ER is on.) Nothing! It's over! Dammit! This is regularly scheduled programming!

（看电视，正在播《急诊室的故事》）没了！演完了！见鬼！只剩日常电视节目！

Monica

Can we turn the TV off? Okay? Do we really want to spend the entire weekend like this?

能把电视关掉吗？我们真的要这样浪费周末吗？

Chandler

Oh, I'm sorry, am I getting in the way of all the room switching fun?

抱歉，是我以换房为乐吗？

Monica

Hey, don't blame me for wigging tonight!

别怪我！

Chandler

Oh, who should I blame? The nice bell man who had to drag our luggage to 10 different rooms?

我该怪谁？怪客气的服务生把我们的行李换了十间房吗？

Monica

I don't know, how about the idiot who thought he could drive from Albany to Canada on a half a tank of gas!

怪那个只剩一半汽油还想从纽约逃到加拿大的蠢货如何？

Chandler

Do not speak ill of the dead.

别说死人的坏话。

Monica

We're supposed to uh, be spending a romantic weekend together, it-it, what is the matter with you?

我们本要共度浪漫周末。你怎么回事？

Chandler

I just want to watch a little television. What is the big deal? Geez, relax mom.

我只想看点电视，有什么大不了。别急，妈妈。

Monica

What did you say?

你说什么？

Chandler

I said, "Geez, relax Monnnnn."

我说“别急，莫——妮——”。

Rachel

Hi!

嗨！

Ross

Hey. Rachel, I-I-I've been wanting to tell you something for a while now and I really, I just have to get it out.

嘿。瑞秋，我一直想跟你谈谈这事，现在我必须说清楚。

Rachel

Okay, what's up?

好，什么事？

Ross

Okay, y'know how you told me I should do whatever it takes to fix my marriage?

你说过，我应该尽一切努力挽救婚姻。

Rachel

Yeah, I told you to give Emily whatever she wants.

对，我说过，满足爱米丽一切要求。

Ross

And while that was good advice, you should know that what-what she wants...

很好的建议。她的要求就是……

Rachel

Yeah?

嗯？

Ross

...is for me not to see you anymore.

……要我不再见你。

Rachel

That's crazy! You can't do that! What are you going to tell her? (Pause) (Realizes) Oh God. Ohh, you already agreed to this, haven't you?

好离谱！怎么可能！你打算怎么跟她解释？（停顿）（意识到）天啊！你答应了。对吗？

Ross

It's awful I know, I mean, I feel terrible but I have to do this if I want my marriage to work. And I do, I have to make this marriage work. I have too. But the good thing is we can still see each other until she gets here.

我知道这很糟，但为了挽救婚姻，我不得不这么做。我迫不得已，我不想再离婚了。幸好，她来之前我们还能见面。

Rachel

Ohh! Lucky me! Oh my God! That is good news, Ross! I think that's the best news I've heard since Le Poo died!

我真幸运！好消息！这是拉普死后最好的消息！

Ross

You have no idea what a nightmare this has been. This is so hard.

你不知道这决定让我多痛苦。

Rachel

Oh yeah, really? Is it Ross? Yeah? Okay, well let me make this a just a little bit easier for you.

真的？罗斯？好，我帮你止痛。

Ross

What are you doing?

你要干嘛？

Rachel

Storming out!

我要冲出去！

Ross

Rachel, this is your apartment.

瑞秋，这是你家。

Rachel

Yeah, well that's how mad I am!!

这下你知道我多生气了？

Commercial Break

广告时间

Chandler

Damn Roll-os!

见鬼的巧克力！

Joey

Hey, you're back!

你回来了！

Chandler

Hey.

嘿。

Joey

How was your conference?

会开得如何？

Chandler

It was terrible. I fought with (Pause) my colleagues y'know, the entire time. Are you kidding with this? (Throws away another Rollo)

很糟。我一直跟——同事吵架。（又扔掉一颗巧克力）搞什么飞机？

Joey

Oh, so your weekend was a total bust?

周末很糟糕？

Chandler

Uh, no, I got to see Donald Trump waiting for an elevator.

那倒也不是，我看到名人等电梯。

Monica

(entering) Hi!

（走进来）嗨！

Joey

Hey, you're back too!

你也回来了！

Monica

Yeah. Umm, Chandler can I talk to you outside for a second?

钱德，出来谈谈？

Joey

Hey, how was your chef thing?

你的烹饪大会怎样？

Monica

Oh, it was awful. (To Chandler) I guess some people just don't appreciate really good food.

很糟。（对钱德）有些人不爱美食。

Chandler

Well, maybe it was the kind of food that tasted good at first but then made everybody vomit and have diarrhea.

是不是那些食物好吃，但让人呕吐且拉肚子？

Monica

Chandler! (Motions for him to come outside.)

钱德！（示意他出来）

Chandler

Monica. (Follows her out.)

莫妮卡。（跟出去）

Monica

Okay, I'd like to know how much the room was because I'd like to pay my half.

房钱多少？我付一半。

Chandler

Okay, fine, $300.

好，300元。

Monica

300 dollars?!

300元？

Chandler

Yeah, just think of it as $25 per room!

想想看！每个房间25元！

Monica

Urghh!!

呃！！

Joey

(sticking his head out the door) What are you guys woofing about?

（从门后探出头）你们商量什么呢？

Monica

Chandler stole a twenty from my purse!

钱德偷了我一张20元的！

Joey

Nooooo!!! Y'know what? Now that I think about it, I constantly find myself without twenties and you always have lots!

这就对了！难怪我总是没有20元的，你却有很多！

Ross

You should've seen the look on her face. I don't want Rachel to hate me! I don't know what to do.

你们该看看她的表情。我不想让瑞秋恨我。我该怎么办。

Joey

You want my advice?

要听我的建议吗？

Ross

Yes! Please!

请说！

Joey

You're not gonna like it.

不中听。

Ross

That's okay.

说吧，没事。

Joey

You got married too fast.

你这次结婚太仓促。

Ross

That's not advice!

这算建议？

Joey

I told ya.

早说过不中听。

Ross

I'm going to the bathroom. (Gets up and exits.)

我去厕所先。（起身离开）

Joey

Man, if anyone asked me to give up any of you, I couldn't do it.

放弃你们中的任何一个？我可不干。

Chandler and Phoebe

Yeah, me either.

我也是。

Monica

Maybe I could do it.

也许我可以！

Rachel

(entering) Hi!

（走进来）嗨！

Joey

Hi, Rach.

嗨，瑞秋。

Chandler

Hi!

嗨！

Phoebe

Hey.

嘿。

Monica

Hey.

嘿。

Rachel

Look, I know you guys heard about the whole thing with me and Ross but y'know, I've been obsessing about it all day and I'd just love not to talk about it. All right?

你们听说我和罗斯的纠纷了。今天我深受困扰，现在不想再提了，可以吗？

Joey

I-I-I don't know if this falls under this category, but uh, Ross is right back there. (Points over his shoulder.)

我不知道这算不算犯忌，但罗斯就在那儿。（指向身后）

Rachel

That's not Ross!

那不是罗斯！

Phoebe

Oh no! Not that guy! He does look like him though.

虽然他很像罗斯。

Chandler

Okay, Ross is in the bathroom.

罗斯在洗手间。

Rachel

Oh my God, its happening. It's already started. I'm Kip.

天啊！终于开始了！我成了Kip。

Joey

Hey, you're not Kip!

你才不是Kip！

Rachel

(To Joey) Do you even know who Kip is?

（对乔伊）你晓得谁是Kip？

Joey

Who cares? You're Rachel! (To Chandler) Who's Kip?

管他是谁！你是瑞秋！（对钱德）谁是Kip？

Chandler

Kip, my old roommate, y'know we all used to hang out together.

我的旧室友，我们曾经玩得很好。

Joey

Oh, that poor bastard.

噢，是那条可怜虫呀。

Rachel

See? Yeah, you told me the story. He and Monica dated when they broke up they couldn't even be in the same room together and you all promised that you would stay his friend and what happened? He got phased out!

你跟我说过他的事。他和莫妮卡约会过，他们分手后无法共处一室，你们都保证会继续跟他做朋友，结果呢？他被踢出局了！

Monica

You're not gonna be phased out!

你不会出局！

Rachel

Well, of course I am! It's not gonna happen to Ross! He's your brother. (To Chandler) He's your old college roommate. Ugh, it was just a matter of time before someone had to leave the group. I just always assumed Phoebe would be the one to go.

怎么不会？罗斯不会这么惨，他是你哥哥，你的大学室友。迟早有一天，有人会离开这个团队。我本以为离开的会是菲比。

Phoebe

Ehh!!

呃！！

Rachel

Honey, come on! You live far away! You're not related. You lift right out.

宝贝，你住得远，又不是亲戚，你不同类。

Chandler

(entering) Hey!

（走进来）嘿！

Joey

Hey, Mr. Bing. That uh, hotel you stayed at called. Said someone left an eyelash curler in your room.

嘿，宾先生。你住的那家宾馆来电，说有人在你房间留下了睫毛夹。

Chandler

Yes that was mine.

对，那是我的。

Joey

'Cause I figured you'd hooked up with some girl and she'd left it there.

是不是你带去的什么妞留下的？

Chandler

Yes that would have made more sense.

你的说法似乎更合理。

Joey

Y'know, I-I don't even feel like I know you anymore man! All right, look, I'm just gonna ask you this one time. And whatever you say, I'll believe ya. (Pause.) Were you, or were you not on a gay cruise?!

我越来越不了解你了！我只问你一次，不管你说什么，我都相信你。（停顿）你是不是参加了同性恋游行？

Rachel

Phoebe? (She turns her head further away.) I'm sorry about the whole lifting out thing. (Moves over next to her.) You gotta come with me!

菲比？（菲比把头转得更远）抱歉那天我说话伤了你的心。（挪到她旁边）我们和好吧？

Phoebe

Come where?

怎么个和好法？

Rachel

Wherever I go. Come on you and me, we'll-we'll start a new group, we're the best ones.

我们要同进同出，当最好的朋友。

Phoebe

Okay, but try and get Joey too.

好，拉乔伊也入伙。

Ross

(entering) Pheebs, you mind if I speak to Rachel alone for a sec?

（走进来）菲比，我跟瑞秋单独谈谈好吗？

Phoebe

Oh, sure! (She gets up to leave.) Bye Ross! (Whispering behind his back.) Forever.

当然！（起身离开）再见，罗斯！（在他背后小声说）永别。

Ross

Hi.

嗨。

Rachel

Hi. What are you doing here? Isn't this against the rules?

嗨。你还来干嘛，你犯规。

Ross

I talked to Monica, look, I'm the one who made the choice. I'm the one who's making things change, so I should be the one to y'know, step back.

我跟莫妮卡谈过了。做选择的人是我，是我让一切面目全非，所以让步的也应该是我。

Rachel

Oh, Ross...

哦，罗斯……

Ross

No, no, it's okay. Really. They're plenty of people who just see their sisters at Thanksgiving and just see their college roommates at reunions and just see Joey at Burger King. So is, is that better?

其实没什么。很多人都只在感恩节能见到姐妹，在同学会才能见到大学室友，在汉堡店广告上才能见到乔伊。我这么说，好受点？

Rachel

No, it's not better. I still don't get to see you.

不，不好。我还是不能见你。

Ross

Well, what-what would you do? Rach, if you were me, what-what would you do?

假如你是我，你会怎样做？

Rachel

Well, for starters I would've said the right name at my wedding!

首先，结婚宣誓时，我要说对名字！

Ross

I can't believe this is happening.

没想到事情变成这样。

Rachel

I know.

我知道。

Ross

I am so sorry.

很抱歉。

Rachel

I know that too.

我也知道。

Joey

(entering) (He clears his throat to get their attention.) Hey, Rach? Sorry to interrupt but umm, Phoebe wanted me to talk to you about a trip or something.

（走进来，清清嗓子引起注意）嘿，瑞秋？抱歉打扰，但菲比说你要跟我谈谈旅行什么的。

Chandler

(entering) Hey!

（走进来）嘿！

Monica

Hi.

嗨。

Chandler

I just came over to drop off...nothing. So that weekend kinda sucked, huh?

我只是顺路过来……没什么事。那个周末很烂，对吧？

Monica

Yeah, it did.

是。

Chandler

So, I guess this is over.

我们完了？

Monica

What?

什么？

Chandler

Well, y'know, you and me, it had to end sometime.

你和我，总有分手的一天。

Monica

Why, exactly?

为什么？

Chandler

Because of the weekend, we had a fight.

周末我们吵架了。

Monica

Chandler that's crazy! If you give up every time you'd have a fight with someone you'd never be with anyone longer than---Ohhh! (They both realize something there.)

钱德，别傻了！如果一吵架就分手，那你谈恋爱不会超过——哦！（两人都意识到什么）

Chandler

So, this isn't over?

我们没分手？

Monica

(laughs) You are so cute! No. No, it was a fight. You deal with it and move on! It's nothing to freak out about.

（笑）你真可爱！只是吵架，吵过就算了。并不可怕。

Chandler

Really? Okay. Great!

真的？太好了！

Monica

Ohh, welcome to an adult relationship! (She goes to kiss him.)

欢迎你加入成年人的恋爱关系。（她上前吻他）

Chandler

(stops her) We're in a relationship?

（拦住她）我们是在恋爱？

Monica

I'm afraid so.

恐怕是的。

Chandler

Okay.

好。

(They kiss.)

（他们接吻）

Phoebe

Hey!

嘿！

Monica

Hey!

嘿！

Phoebe

Oh hey, Monica, I heard you saw Donald Trump at your convention.

莫妮卡，我听说你参加大会时见到名人？

Monica

Yeah, I saw him waiting for an elevator.

对，看到他等电梯。

(Joey thinks that sounds familiar, but dismisses the thought.)

（乔伊觉得耳熟，但没多想）

Monica

Hey, Rach, can I borrow your eyelash curler, I think I lost mine.

嘿，瑞秋，我能用你的睫毛夹吗？我的丢了。

Rachel

Yeah, it's in there. (Points to the bathroom.)

在浴室里。

(Joey puts two and two together.)

（乔伊把线索联系起来）

Joey

(shocked) Oh! Ohh! Oh!!

（震惊）哦！哦！哦！

Chandler

Joey, can I talk to you for a second? (He grabs him and starts to drag Joey into Monica's room.)

乔伊，我能跟你谈谈吗？（抓住他，把他往莫妮卡房间里拖）

Joey

Oohh!! Ohh! Oh-oh-oh! Oh-oh!!

哦！！哦！哦-哦-哦！哦-哦！！

(Chandler pushes him through the door and Monica closes it behind them.)

（钱德把他推进门，莫妮卡关上门）

Joey

Ohhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!

哦——！！！

Chandler

Yes. Yes. (Lets him up.)

没错。（放开他）

Joey

(To Chandler) You?! (To Monica) And-and you?!

（对钱德）你？（对莫妮卡）还有你？

Monica

Yes, but you cannot tell anyone! No one knows!

但你要保密，他们都不知道。

Joey

How?! When?!

怎么发生的？什么时候？

Chandler

It happened in London.

在伦敦。

Joey

IN LONDON!!!

伦敦！

Chandler

The reason we didn't tell anyone was because we didn't want to make a big deal out of it.

我们不声张，是不想把事情闹大。

Joey

But it is a big deal!! I have to tell someone!

但这是大事！我必须告诉谁！

(They both grab him and stop him.)

（两人抓住他，不让他走）

Chandler

No-no-no-no-no! You can't!

不，不，不许！

Monica

Please? Please?! We just don't want to deal with telling everyone, okay? Just promise you won't tell.

求你，我们不想告诉大家，你保证你不说出去。

(Joey thinks it over.)

（乔伊想了想）

Joey

All right! Man, this is unbelievable! I mean, it's great, but...

好吧！难以置信！太棒了，但是……

Monica

I know, it's great!

是很棒！

(She goes over and kisses Chandler.)

（她走过去吻钱德）

Joey

Aww, I don't want to see that!

我才不要看！

Phoebe

We're so stupid! Do you know what's going on in there? They're trying to take Joey!

我们真笨！知道他们在里面干嘛？他们想拉拢乔伊！

Ending Credits

片尾

Phoebe

The most popular Phoebe in tennis is called the overhand Phoebe. And if you win, you must slap your opponent on the Phoebe and say, "Hi, Phoebe!"

在网球界最受欢迎的菲比叫“上手菲比”。取胜后拍拍对手的“菲比”，然后说“嗨，菲比！”

Monica

Oh that's cute! We really all enjoyed it. But y'know, it doesn't count.

很可爱，我们都爱听，但是不算。

Phoebe

Count for what?

不算什么？

Monica

Count in our heads as-as good Madlibs.

不算玩得好的Madlibs游戏。

(They put their notepads down and get up to leave.)

（他们放下便签本，起身离开）

Joey

I guess I'm done.

我玩够了。

Chandler

Fun's over!

游戏结束！

Monica

Wait-wait, guys! If-if we follow the rules, it's still fun and it means something!

等等，照规矩做，不但有趣而且有意义！

Rachel

Uh-huh!

嗯哼！

Joey

I think I'm gonna take-off.

我退出。

Monica

Guys, rules are good! Rules help control the fun! (They all leave and close the door on Monica.) Ohhh! (Throws her notepad down in disgust.)

伙计们，规则是好东西！规则使乐趣也有条有理！（大家都离开，把门关上，留下莫妮卡一人在屋里）哦！（厌恶地扔掉便签本）

End

结束