The One With The Free Porn

Mr. Treeger

Ohhh, man!!

哦！！

Joey

(coming in from his bedroom) What is that?

（从卧室出来）谁在那？

Chandler

Treeger's snaking the shower drain.

特里格在通洗澡间的下水道。

Mr. Treeger

What in the name of hell?

这是什么鬼东西？

Joey

Maybe he found you flip-flop.

可能他找到了你的人字拖。

(Joey sits down and changes the channel, and we see two people making out.)

（乔伊坐下换台，我们看到两个人正在亲热。）

Chandler

Hey!

嘿！

Joey

Whoa! Is this porn? What did I do? I must've hit something on the remote.

哇！这是黄片吗？我怎么弄的？我一定是按了哪个键。

Chandler

Do we pay for this?

我们要花钱吗？

Joey

No, we didn't even pay our cable bill---maybe this is how they punish us.

不，我们还没交有线的钱呢，可能他们是为这事惩罚我们。

Chandler

Maybe we shouldn't pay our phone bill---free phone sex.

也许我们不该交电话费，免费色情电话。

Joey

Maybe we shouldn't pay our gas bill? (Stops and thinks about what he just said.)

也许我们不该交煤气费了？（停下来想了想自己刚说的话）

Mr. Treeger

(coming in from the bathroom) Whoa, hey, that lady's all kinds of naked.

（从浴室出来）哇，嘿，那女的真是一丝不挂。

Chandler

Yeah, Joey just pressed something on the remote and it just, came on!

是，乔伊在遥控器上按了一下，然后就来啦！

Mr. Treeger

Yeah, it happened to me once. I was just flipping through the channels and bam! It was like finding money.

我也遇到过一次。我就是在搜索频道，然后砰！就像找到钱一样。

Chandler

Like finding money with naked people on it!

像找到了钱，还有裸体的人在上面！

Mr. Treeger

Then I made the mistake of turning off the TV, I never got it back again. And I'm sad. (Exits.)

然后我错误地关掉了电视，我再也没找回来它。我很伤心。（离开）

Joey

(to Chandler) Why would he turn off the TV? (Chandler shrugs.)

（对钱德勒）他为什么会关电视？（钱德勒耸肩）

OPENING CREDITS

片头字幕

Rachel

All right, y'know what, come on, do we really have to watch this while we eat? (She makes a move for the remote.)

好了，你知道吗，拜托，我们吃东西的时候也得看它吗？（她伸手去拿遥控器）

Joey and Chandler

(stopping her) Oh no-no-no-no!

（制止她）哦别别别！

Chandler

We don't know what could make this go away.

我们不知道怎么让它消失。

Joey

Yeah, so no one touches the remote. And no one touches the TV!

对，所以谁也不许碰遥控器。还有电视！

Chandler

And no one touches the air around the TV!

也不许碰电视周围的空气！

Joey

Imagine a protective porn bubble if you will, okay?

就想象有个黄片防护罩在那，好吗？

Monica

Well at least, I'm going to mute it.

那至少，我要消音。

Joey and Chandler

Oh no-no-no! (Monica mutes the TV and they tentatively look behind them)

哦别别别！（莫妮卡消音，他们试探性地回头看）

Chandler

We still have porn.

我们还有黄片看。

Joey

Hey.

嘿。

Phoebe

(entering, carrying her massage table) Hi!

（扛着按摩床走进来）嗨！

Monica

Hi!

嗨！

Rachel

Honey, what are you doing? That's too heavy.

亲爱的，你在干什么？这太重了。

Phoebe

Yeah.

是啊。

Rachel

Give it here. (She takes the table.) Oh, God. (And gives it to Monica right away.)

给我吧。（她接过床）哦，天哪。（马上递给莫妮卡）

Monica

Okay.

好的。

Phoebe

Ohh, I'm getting too pregnant for this, lugging around a stupid massage table. Y'know, I have to find a job where I carry a smaller table. (She goes over and stands in front of the TV.)

哦，我快不行了，不能再拖着这破按摩床到处走。我得找个拿小点床的工作。（她走过去站在电视前）

Chandler

Or a job where you don't have to carry a table.

或者不用床的工作。

Phoebe

You mean like a doctor?

你是说像做医生？

Joey

Pheebs! You're blocking the porn! Look out!

菲比斯！你挡住黄片了！小心点！

Phoebe

Ohh! (She moves.) Oh my. Oh, that reminds me, I have to see my OB-GYN today.

哦！（她挪开）哦天。哦，这提醒我，我今天得去看妇产科医生。

Ross

Hi.

嗨。

Monica

Hi.

嗨。

Ross

So uh, Emily just went to the airport.

嗯，艾米丽刚去机场了。

Monica

Oh. Why didn't you take her?

哦。你怎么不送她去？

Ross

Eh, her-her uncle already had planned on doing it. And y'know, we-we said our good-byes this morning, so...

呃，她——她叔叔已经预定了。而且我们说好就在早上告别，所以……

Monica

You must feel horrible. Hey! The guys have free porn!

你一定很难受。嘿！他们那有免费黄片看！

Ross

(Thinks about it.) Nah.

（想了想）不了。

Monica

Hey, cheer up! You're gonna see her again, right?

嘿，高兴点！你会再见到她的，对吗？

Ross

Well I, that's the thing, I don't know! I mean, whenever I brought it up with her she said, (In a British accent.) "This is so fantastic! Why do we have to talk about the future? Let's just enjoy..."

是这样，我不知道！每次我跟她说起这事她就说，（英国口音）“这样很棒！我们为什么要谈将来？就享受现在多好……”

Monica

(interrupting him) No-no-no, don't-don't do the accent. You've got to see her again.

（打断他）不不不，别用这口音。你得再见她一次。

Ross

And why do you care so much?

你为什么这么在乎？

Monica

Because! You could get to live out my fantasy!

因为！你能得到我幻想的生活！

Ross

You had fantasies about Emily?

你幻想和艾米丽？

Monica

No! Y'know, the fantasy! Meet someone from a strange land, fall in madly love, and spend the rest of your lives together.

不！我的幻想！认识国外的人，疯狂地相爱，共度余生。

Ross

Is that why in junior high you were the only one that hung out with that Ukrainian kid?

这就是为什么在高中时只有你和那个乌克兰的小孩交朋友是吗？

Monica

Yeah that, plus his mom used to put sour cream on everything!

是的，还有他妈妈总是把酸奶油抹在吃的上！

Ross

Ahh.

啊。

Monica

Do you love her?

你爱她吗？

Ross

We said it was only going to be two weeks, y'know?

我们说好就是两周的事，你知道？

Monica

You love her!

你爱她！

Ross

What-what is love really?

什么才是爱？

Monica

Ohhh, I knew you loved her! Then you need to go to the airport and tell her. You're probably just gonna catch her just as she's about to go to the gate. You're gonna call out her name and say, "I love you!" And she's gonna say, "I love you, too!" And you guys are going to have the most amazing kiss, everyone at the gate will applaud.

哦，我就知道你爱她！那你就得去机场告诉她。你会在她登机前一刻叫住她。你大声喊，“我爱你！”然后她会说，“我也爱你！”你们会有美妙的一吻，所有人都会喝彩。

Ross

I am a good kisser.

我接吻很棒。

Monica

Then you two can, can sneak into the cockpit, and things will start to heat up, and then a stewardess comes in... (Ross looks at her.) I've been watching too much porn.

然后你们，钻进驾驶舱，热血澎湃，然后空姐进来了……（罗斯看着她）我看黄片看多了。

Rachel

Is that the heartbeat?

那是心跳吗？

The Doctor

That's it.

没错。

Phoebe

Oh my God!

天哪！

Rachel

Oh wow! This is so cool.

哦哇！太棒了。

(The heartbeat changes, and we hear a different one.)

（心跳声变了，我们听到另一种心跳。）

The Doctor

Have we talked about the possibility of multiple births?

我们提到过多胞胎的可能性吗？

Phoebe

Why don't take care of this one, and should I get pregnant again, I'll hold onto your card, okay?

为什么不就先管这个，我要是想再怀孕，我会留住你名片的，好吗？

The Doctor

No, I'm getting three separate heartbeats.

不，我发现了三个不同的心跳。

Phoebe

Three? You guys were worried I wouldn't even have one!

三个？你们还担心我一个都怀不上！

The Doctor

Doctors are wrong all the time.

医生们总是错的。

Phoebe

Well, yeah.

嗯，是啊。

Rachel

Well, so, are-are you sure that there are three?!

那么，你确定有三个？！

The Doctor

Definitely. (Points out each head on the ultrasound.)

确定。（在B超上指出每个头）

Phoebe

Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!! So I-I mean so in a few months I'm going to have three full grown babies just walkin' around inside me?! Oh! Oh! And it's gonna be one of those log rides where they just come shooting out!

天哪！天哪！天哪！！几个月后就会有三个孩子在我肚子里转悠？！哦！哦！然后他们就像急流涌进的木船一样冲出来！

The Doctor

Actually, giving birth to three babies isn't that different from giving birth to one.

实际上，生三个跟生一个差不多。

Phoebe

What do you know?!

你知道什么？！

Alice

(entering) Oh-oh, Phoebe!

（走进来）哦哦，菲比！

Phoebe

Ooh! Hi!

哦！嗨！

Alice

Hi! (She runs over and hugs Phoebe's stomach.) So, how did it go at the doctors?

嗨！（她跑过去抱住菲比的肚子）看医生看得怎么样？

Phoebe

Oh well, okay, hey, y'know how when you're umm, you're walking down the street and you see three people in a row, and you say, "Oh, that's nice?"

哦，好吧，嘿，你知道你呃，你走在街上看见三个人并排走，你会说，“哦，真好？”

Frank

Yes.

是的。

Phoebe

Okay, yeah well, good news, you're going to have three babies.

好的，嗯，好消息，你们有了三个孩子。

Alice

Three babies?

三个？

Frank

I finally got my band!

我总算能组乐队了！

Alice

We're gonna have a big family, I've always wanted a big family!

我们会有个大家庭，我一直想要个大家庭！

Phoebe

Oh God, I'm so glad you guys are happy, I was so afraid you were going to be all freaked.

哦天哪，你们很愿意我太高兴了，我一直担心会把你们吓坏了。

Frank

Why would we be freaked?

我们为什么要害怕？

Phoebe

No, no maybe 'cause it's harder to raise them, and the added expense, and...

不，可能因为养他们会很难，加倍的费用，还有……

Frank

(They're less than happy now) Oh.

（他们现在不那么高兴了）哦。

Alice

Right.

对。

Phoebe

No, back to happy. Back to happy!

不，回到高兴的样子。回到高兴的样子！

Alice

No-no-no, no, it's going to be fine. Because umm, because I teach Home Ec, and uh, I can have 30 kids making baby clothes all year long. Y'know it'll-it'll be like my very own little sweatshop.

不是，不会有事的。因为呃，我教家政课，呃，我能让30个孩子一年到头做小孩的衣服。就像我自己有个小汗衫店一样。

Frank

Yeah, I've been thinking ever since you said we were having triplets, the best thing for me to do is to drop out of college and get a job.

对，你一说我们有三个孩子我就在想，我最好离开大学找个工作。

Alice

No, Frank.

不，弗兰克。

Phoebe

No you can't quit college! No! You're in college? Really?

不，你不能退学！不！你在上大学？真的？

Frank

Yeah, refrigerator college.

是的，冰箱大学。

Alice

Yeah.

是的。

Frank

Yeah, y'know when we found out we were going to have a baby, y'know I figured y'know like I should y'know have like a career---and I love refrigerators!

当我们知道要有孩子了，我觉得我该有个职业，而且我喜欢冰箱！

Phoebe

You can't give up on your dream.

你不能放弃梦想。

Frank

No, it's okay. We're-we're gonna have three kids! And that's-that's a different kind of dream. Three kids and no money.

不，没关系。我们有三个孩子！这是另一种梦想。三个孩子，没钱。

Ticket Agent

(On the P.A.) This is the boarding call for Flight 009.

（广播）009号航班开始登机。

Ross

Emily! (Runs up.)

艾米丽！（跑上前）

Emily

Oh my God! What are you doing here? (They hug)

天哪！你来干什么？（他们拥抱）

Ross

I just, I had to see you one more time before you took-off.

我就是，我得在你走前再见你一面。

Emily

You are so sweet. (They kiss.)

你真好。（他们接吻）

Ross

That's, that's, that's a big candy bar. (She's holding one of those huge Toblerone bars.) I had the most amazing time with you.

这，这个巧克力够大的。（她拿着一个大号的三角巧克力棒）和你一起我度过了最美妙的时光。

Emily

Me too.

我也是。

Ticket Agent

This is the final boarding call for Flight 009.

009号航班最后一次登机广播。

Emily

Well, that' me. (They kiss again.) Here, have this. (She gives him the candy bar.) I'm only allowed one piece of carryon anyway. (She starts towards the jetway.)

好了，是我了。（他们再次接吻）拿着这个。（她把巧克力棒给他）我只能随身带一件行李。（她走向登机桥）

Ross

(stops her) Wait uh, listen. I-I, I have to tell you something. Umm, I've been thinking, I'm just gonna come out and say it. Okay? I-I-I ah, I-I think I love you.

（叫住她）等等呃，听着。我——我，我得告诉你件事。嗯，我在考虑，我就是想出来就说了。好吗？我呃，我——我想我爱你。

Emily

Oh. (She's shocked and hugs him.) Thank you. (She boards the plane.)

哦。（她震惊了，拥抱他）谢谢。（她登机）

Ross

That's no problem.

没问题。

COMMERCIAL BREAK

广告时间

Rachel

What's that song? It has been in my head all day long.

这是什么歌？在我脑袋里转悠一天了。

Chandler

It's the theme from Good Will Humping.

是《善意作爱》的主题歌。

Rachel

Y'know who doesn't even like dirty movies? My new boyfriend Joshua.

你知道谁不喜欢看黄片？我的新男朋友乔舒亚。

Joey

Yeah right.

可不是嘛。

Rachel

No, he told me. He prefers to leave certain things to the imagination.

不，他说了。他更喜欢留点东西去想象。

Chandler

Oh-oh, yeah, and did he also say that ah, some of the dialogue was corny and that he actually found it was funny and not sexy?

哦哦，对，他还说了呃，有些对话很粗俗，他会觉得好笑而不是性感？

Rachel

Yes!

对！

Joey

Yeah, he likes porn.

对，他喜欢黄片。

(Rachel starts to leave.)

（瑞秋开始离开。）

Monica

Where ya going?

你去哪？

Rachel

I'm going to find out if he really thinks supermodels are too skinny. (As she exits, Phoebe enters.) Hey, Pheebs!

我得去弄清楚他是不是真的认为名模都枯瘦如柴。（她出去时，菲比进来）嘿，菲比斯！

Phoebe

Hey.

嘿。

Joey

Hey!

嘿！

Monica

How did it go with Frank and Alice?

弗兰克和爱丽丝反应如何？

Phoebe

Well, Frank has to quit college because his super fertile sister is having three babies! I need to make a lot of money really fast, and I had an idea that I want to talk to you (Points to Chandler) about, 'cause you work for a big company. Okay, insider trading, what information is there that you can give me.

弗兰克不得不退学，因为他超级多产的姐姐怀上三个孩子！我得马上赚一大笔钱，而且我有了个主意，我得跟你谈谈（指着钱德勒），因为你在大公司工作。好，内幕交易，你能给我什么情报。

Chandler

They don't really talk to us about that kind of stuff. I can get you some free white out though.

他们不会告诉我们这种东西。但我能给你些免费的涂改液。

(Ross enters.)

（罗斯走进来。）

Monica

Ohh! Did you do what I said? Did-did-did you tell her?

哦！你照我说的做了吗？你告诉她了吗？

Ross

I did.

是的。

Monica

And well, what did she say?

她说什么了？

Ross

Thank you.

谢谢。

Monica

Oh, you're totally welcome! What'd she say?

哦，不用客气！她说什么了？

Ross

She said, "Thank you." I said, "I love you." And she said, "Thank you."

她说，“谢谢。”我说，“我爱你。”她却说，“谢谢。”

Chandler

Whoa-whoa, wait a minute, did you say, you love her?

哇哦哇哦，等一下，你说了，你爱她？

Joey

Yeah, what were you trying to get her to do?!

你想让她怎么做？！

Ross

What do I do now?

我现在怎么办？

Joey

You play hard to get.

玩欲擒故纵，疏远她。

Ross

She already lives in London.

她已经在伦敦了。

Joey

Then you go to Tokyo.

那你就去东京。

Chandler

All right look, forget it, forget it. You told her you love her, it's over.

好吧，算了。你告诉她你爱她，就已经完了。

Monica

It is not over! You're over!

没完！你才完了呢！

Chandler

What?

什么？

Monica

You know!

你知道！

Chandler

Okay. (Pause) Good one.

好的。（停顿）说得好。

Monica

It is not over because she is going to call you and tell you she loves you. And the reason why she couldn't, is because her feelings were so strong, it scared her. Now you go home and wait for her call, she could be calling you from the plane! Come on now go! Go! (Tries to push Ross out the door.)

还没完，因为她会给你电话，告诉你她爱你。而她先前不说的原因是，她感情太强烈了，她害怕。你现在回家等她电话，她很可能在飞机上就打电话！快点现在就走！走！（想把罗斯推出门）

Ross

Okay! Okay! But if she doesn't call, it is definitely over! No, wait. Wait. Unless, eventually, I call her, y'know just to see what's going on, and, and she says she'll call me back, but then she doesn't. Then it's over.

好的！好的！但是如果她没打，就真的完了！不，等等。除非，最后，我给她打，问问她怎么样了，然后她说她会打回来，但她没有。这样就真的完了。

(Joey holds his fist up, and Chandler gives him two thumbs up.)

（乔伊举起拳头，钱德勒对他竖起两个大拇指。）

Joey

Way to be strong, man!

够坚强，老兄！

(Ross leaves, and after the door closes, Joey gives him the loser sign.)

（罗斯离开，门关上后，乔伊对他做了个“失败者”的手势。）

Rachel

Hey!

嘿！

Chandler

Hi! Listen, can we watch cartoons on your television? We need a porn break. We spent the last two hours watching In & Out & In, Again.

嗨！我们能在你这看会卡通吗？需要休息一下。我们已经看了两个小时的进进出出了。

Rachel

Well, so, why don't you just turn it off?

那么，你们为什么不关了它？

Chandler

Because then we would be the guys who turned off free porn.

因为那样我就会成为关掉免费黄片的家伙。

Phoebe

(entering carrying a case) Ooh, good, you're here! Okay.

（提着一个箱子走进来）哦，好，你们都在！好的。

Monica

Hey!

嘿！

Phoebe

Hi!

嗨！

Rachel

Well, what-what 'cha got there?

你那是什么？

Phoebe

Oh this, well I'm glad you asked. (She opens the case and removes a knife and a soda can.) Now, don't you hate it when you have to cut a tin can with an ordinary steak knife? (She efficiently cuts it in half.) Ahh! Now, I know what you're thinking...

哦这个，很高兴你问了。（她打开箱子，拿出一把刀和一个易拉罐）难道你不讨厌用普通的切肉刀去切易拉罐吗？（她利落地把它切成两半）啊！现在，我知道你们在想什么……

Chandler

Pregnant Woman Slays Four?

“孕妇杀了四个人”？

Monica

Phoebe, they didn't make you pay for those knives, did they?

菲比，他们没让你买这些刀吧？

Phoebe

No!

没有！

Monica

Are you sure?

你确定？

Phoebe

No!

不！

Rachel

Honey, you're not gonna make enough money to help Frank and Alice just by selling knives.

亲爱的，你不能光靠卖刀来帮助弗兰克和爱丽丝赚足够的钱。

Phoebe

No-no, I know that, but I just have to make enough money for the second part of my plan.

不，我知道，但我需要本钱执行我第二步计划。

Chandler

What's the second part of your plan?

你的第二步计划是什么？

Phoebe

My Saturn dealership.

做“土星”轿车的代理。

Ross

(Answers the phone.) Hello?

（接起电话）喂？

Emily

Ross.

罗斯。

Ross

Emily, hi! Uh, how-how was your flight?

艾米丽，嗨！呃，旅途愉快吗？

Emily

It was dreadful. I felt terrible about how I acted when you said those wonderful things.

糟透了。你说了如此美妙的话，而我却那么回应，我觉得难受极了。

Ross

No, no, that-that, that's all right. Umm, I'm just glad you called.

不，没关系。嗯，我很高兴你给我电话。

Emily

Ross umm, there's something that I've got to tell you, there's-there's someone else.

罗斯嗯，我得告诉你件事，有——有另外一个人。

Ross

Does that mean the same thing in England as it does in America?

这句话在英国的意思和在美国的一样吗？

Ross

She doesn't know which one of us she wants, me or this Colin guy.

她不知道该选谁，我还是那个叫科林的家伙。

Monica

This isn't how it's supposed to go, there can't be another guy.

不应该是这样的，不应该有别人。

Ross

Well...

嗯……

Monica

Of course there's another guy!! This is even more perfect! Now you have to prove your love!

当然得有别人！！这更完美了！现在你要证明你的爱！

Ross

I'm not proving anything. Okay, I'm done listening to you. If I hadn't let you talk me into going to the airport in the first place, I never would've put my fist through the wall!

我什么也不证明。好了，我不听你的了。如果我没先听你的跑到机场去，我就不会让拳头砸在墙上！

Chandler

You put your fist through the wall?

你把拳头砸在墙上了？

Ross

No, I missed and hit the door. But, it opened really hard!

不，我没打着，砸在门上了。但砸的那门晃的可狠了！

Monica

You have to go to London!

你得去伦敦！

Ross

What?

什么？

Monica

Yeah, you have to go fight for her!

是的，你要去为她而战！

Joey

Oh yeah, sure, that makes sense. Yeah. 'Cause you already told her you love her and she didn't say it back, then she called you and told you that there's another guy, so yeah, go to London that'll scare her!

哦对，当然，太有道理了。因为你已经说了你爱她而她却没回应，然后她打电话说还有别人，对，去伦敦吧，吓死她！

Monica

When Rachel was with Paulo, what did you do?

当瑞秋和保罗在一起时，你做了什么？

Ross

I made fun of his accent.

我取笑他的口音。

Monica

You sat back and let him have her, you didn't fight at all. Am I right? Do you want the same thing to happen with Emily?

你退缩了，让他拥有她，你根本就没竞争过。我对吗？你想让这种事在和艾米丽这次再发生吗？

Ross

No.

不。

Monica

All right then, go fight for her! Go to London! I mean, that could be you and Emily! (Points to the TV.) That, but-but nicer. Just, go to London!

那好，去为她而战！去伦敦！我是说，这可能就是你和艾米丽！（指着电视）那样，但——但更好。快，去伦敦吧！

Ross

Really?

真的？

Monica

Come on! Surprise her! Show up at her doorstep! Don't let her go without a fight!

去吧！给她个惊喜！出现在她门前！别没竞争过就放弃她！

Ross

All right. All right, I'm gonna do it!

好的。好的，我去！

Monica

All right.

好。

Ross

I'm gonna, I'm gonna go to London and I'm going to fight for her.

我要去，我要去伦敦为她而战。

Monica

Okay, good luck!

好的，祝你好运！

(Ross starts to leave.)

（罗斯开始离开。）

Joey

Ross! Ross! If you're going to the airport, could you pick me up another one of those Toblerone bars? (Chandler nods his head no.)

罗斯！罗斯！你要是去机场，你能给我带点那种巧克力吗？（钱德勒摇头表示不）

Rachel

Hey!

嘿！

Phoebe

Ooh-Ooh! I did it! I did it! I figured out a way to make money! I'm gonna open up my own massage place and Frank's gonna help me! And! We can work it around his schedule so he doesn't have to quit school!

哦！我做到了！我做到了！我想到怎么弄钱了！我要开自己的按摩店，弗兰克来帮我！然后！我们按他的时间表工作，这样他就不用退学！

Monica

That sounds great, but how are you going to afford it?

听起来很好，那你用什么做本钱呢？

Rachel

Well, we were walking down the street and we saw that van that you guys used for catering and we realised...

我们在街上看见那辆你们用作承包宴席的货车，我们就想到……

Phoebe

I'm telling it! I'm telling it!

让我说！让我说！

Rachel

Okay.

好的。

Phoebe

Okay. You know how people need transportation, but they also need massages to help them relax so I just figured we could combine the two, okay, I give the massages and Frank drives! I can fix up the van, bolt the table in the back, and you know what I've got?

好的。你知道人们需要交通工具，但同时又需要按摩来放松，所以我要合二为一，好吗，我按摩而弗兰克开车！我可以收拾一下那货车，在后面安个床，你们知道我想出什么了？

Chandler

A place where no one will ever get out alive?

谁也不能活着出来的地方？

Phoebe

No! Think about it, it's a taxi that people take when they need to relax, it's...

不是！想想，是人们想放松时要的出租车，是……

Rachel

(interrupting) Relaxi-Taxi!

（打断）放松-出租！

Phoebe

The name was my favourite part!

名字是最精彩的！

Rachel

Well, well I came up with it!

是我想出来的！

Phoebe

YOU DID NOT!!!! Oh! No! You came up with Relaxi Cab! That's not good.

不是你！！！！哦！不！你想的是放松的士！一点也不好听。

Rachel

Well, I...

嗯，我……

(The phone rings and Monica answers it.)

（电话响了，莫妮卡接起。）

Monica

Hello.

喂。

Ross

(on phone) Hey.

（电话里）嘿。

Monica

Oh my God! Ross, are you in England? Was Emily surprised?

天哪！罗斯，你在英国？艾米丽吃惊了吗？

Ross

No, because she hasn't come home yet. And she hasn't been home all night! She's obviously staying with that other guy, and I'm the stupid moron who spent the whole night outside her apartment!

没有，因为她还没回家。她一晚都不在家！很显然她跟那个人在一起，而我则是一晚上站在她家门口的白痴！

Monica

All right. When is, when is the next flight out?

好吧。下个航班是什么时候？

Ross

About four hours.

四个小时后。

Monica

Okay, just stay there a couple more hours and if she doesn't show up by then, then just come on home.

好的，再等几个小时，如果她还没回来，就回家吧。

Phoebe

Hey, tell him about Relaxi-Taxi, and-and ask him if he thinks that's better than Relaxi Cab.

嘿，告诉他“放松-出租”的事，问问他是不是比“放松的士”好听。

Rachel

Okay, it's not Relaxi Cab. It's Relaxicab, like taxicab.

好了，不是放松的士。是放松车，就像出租车。

Phoebe

Oh, that is better.

哦，这个更好。

Chandler

Are we in London?

我们在伦敦吗？

Monica

What are you doing here? You can't be here!

你在这干吗？你不能在这！

Emily

I've uh, I've come to talk to Ross.

我呃，我想和罗斯谈谈。

(She sets her bag down on the foosball table and Joey sees the Toblerone bar sticking out of it and gazes longingly at it.)

（她把包放在桌上足球桌上，乔伊看到包里的三角巧克力棒，渴望地盯着它。）

Emily

What?

什么？

Joey

(pause) Nothing. No, nothing.

（停顿）没什么。不，没什么。

Emily

I was going to call him, but...

我本来要给他打电话，但是……

Monica

Oh, you came to tell him you love him! I knew it! (Points at Chandler) I was right! (Points to Emily) I'm right, right?

哦，你来告诉他你爱他！我就知道！（指着钱德勒）我是对的！（指着艾米丽）我是对的，对吗？

Emily

I'd really rather talk to him.

我更想跟他谈谈。

Monica

Oh.

哦。

Emily

I uh, I've been to his apartment and he wasn't there, and uh. I need to talk to him, so do you have any idea where he is?

我呃，我去他公寓他不在，呃。我要跟他谈谈，你们知道他在哪吗？

Emily

Ross, are you there? Ross, I don't know if you can hear this but... (Ross has moved to the window, apparently so that he can hear better.) I'm gonna talk anyway, uh, I'm in the States with your sister and your friends and it's all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell you---Yes, Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell you that I love you.

罗斯，你在那儿吗？罗斯，我不知道你能否听见……（罗斯移到窗边，显然为了听清楚）我还是得说，呃，我在美国和你的妹妹还有朋友们在一起，我和科林完了。我来这告诉你这个，还有——好的，乔伊，你可以把巧克力都拿走，就拿吧！呃，我来这告诉你我爱你。

Ross

(yelling, thinking Emily can hear him through the answering machine all the way to New York.) I love you too! I'm, I'm gonna call you right now from the phone booth! (Realises) You can't hear me. (Goes to make his call.)

（大喊，以为艾米丽能通过答录机听到远在纽约的他）我也爱你！我现在就给你打电话，去电话亭！（意识到）你听不见我。（去打他的电话）

Emily

I wish I could know if you'd heard any of that. I suppose I've either just told you I love you or given my neighbours a good laugh. Mrs. Newman if you're listening, bugger off this in none of your business. I suppose there's not much chance you did hear that, and there's the call waiting so, I should go. Oh well. (Answers the call waiting.) Hello.

我多希望我能知道你听见了。我想我要么是刚告诉你我爱你，要么就是让邻居看了笑话。纽曼夫人，如果你在听，一边去这没你的事。我想你没多大机会听见这些，有电话进来了，我得走了。哦好吧。（接起呼叫等待）喂。

Ross

Hi.

嗨。

Emily

Ross, I love you!

罗斯，我爱你！

Ross

Ohh! Thank you.

哦！谢谢。

CLOSING CREDITS

片尾字幕

Chandler

Hey.

嘿。

Joey

Hey.

嘿。

Chandler

I was just at the bank, and there was this really hot teller, and she didn't ask me to go do it with her in the vault.

我刚才在银行，那有个性感的出纳，但她没要我和她去金库做。

Joey

Same kind of thing happened to me! Woman pizza delivery guy came over, gives me the pizza, takes the money, and leaves!

这事我也遇上了！送馅饼的姑娘来了，给了我馅饼，拿了钱，然后就走了！

Chandler

What, no, "Nice apartment, I bet the bedrooms are huge?"

什么，没有“漂亮的公寓，睡房也一定很大”？

Joey

Noo! Nothing!

不！什么也没发生！

Chandler

Y'know what, we have to turn off the porn.

你知道吗，我们得关掉黄片了。

Joey

I think you're right.

我想你是对的。

(Goes over and picks up the remote.)

（走过去拿起遥控器）

Chandler

All right, ready?

好了，准备好了吗？

Joey

One.

一。

Chandler

Two.

二。

Both

Three.

三。

(Chandler turns off the porn and sets the remote down.)

（钱德勒关掉黄片，放下遥控器）

Joey

That's kinda nice.

这也不错。

Chandler

Yeah, that's kinda a relief.

是啊，还感觉轻松了。

Joey

Yeah.

是啊。

(Pause.)

（停顿）

Chandler

You wanna see if we still have it?

想知道我们是否还能看？

Joey

Yeah.

是。

(Chandler turns on the TV and...)

（钱德勒打开电视……）

Chandler

FREE PORN!!!

免费黄片！！！

Joey

Yeah!!

对！！

Chandler

We have free porn here!!!

我们这有免费黄片！！！

END

结束