The One Where Eddie Won't Go

CHANDLER

Hey Eddie. Daahh!! What're you doin' here?

嘿，艾迪。啊！！你在这里干什么？

EDDIE

Nothin' roomie, just watchin' you sleep.

没什么，室友，只是看你睡觉。

CHANDLER

Why?

为什么？

EDDIE

Makes me feel um, peaceful, heh-heh, please.

那会让我觉得……平静，嘿嘿，请继续。

CHANDLER

I can't sleep now.

我睡不着了。

EDDIE

You want me to sing?

要不要我唱摇篮曲？

CHANDLER

No, look, that's it, it's over, I want you out, I want you out of the apartment now.

够了，我要你现在就给我搬出去。

EDDIE

Woah, woah, woah, what're, what're you talkin' about man.

哇喔，哇喔，哇喔，你在说什么，老兄？

CHANDLER

Hannibal Lecter... better roommate than you.

人魔……当室友都好过你。

EDDIE

No. See now I don't think you're being fair. I mean one night you see me and you get scared, I mean, what about all the other nights when you don't see me, huh? What about last night when you went and got a drink of water and I was nice enough to hide behind the door, what's that about, huh?

不，我认为你这话不公平。你看到我一次就怕了，那没看到我的那些夜晚呢？那你昨天晚上起来喝水……我好心躲在门后没让你看到呢？

CHANDLER

I didn't realize that.

我根本就不知道。

EDDIE

Yeah.

没错。

CHANDLER

GET OUT NOW!!

你马上给我出去！！

EDDIE

Ok, you really want me out?

真的要我出去？

CHANDLER

Yes please.

对，请你快出去。

EDDIE

Ok, then I want to hear you say it, I, I want to hear you say you want me out.

那我要听到你说，你要我出去。

CHANDLER

I want you out.

我要你出去。

EDDIE

No no no, I wanna hear it from your lips.

不……我要听到你的嘴说。

CHANDLER

Where did you hear it from before?

那刚才是我的哪里跟你说的？

EDDIE

Oh, right, all right, you know what pallie I understand, consider me gone, you know what, I'll be out by the time you get home from work tomorrow.

对，好吧你知道吗？朋友，我走了。知道吗？我会在你明天下班前搬出这里。

EDDIE

I heard that.

我听到了。

OPENING TITLES

片头字幕

JOEY

Hey.

嘿。

MONICA

Hey.

嘿。

RACHEL

Hey. Whe-ell, look at you, finally got that time machine workin' huh?

嘿。喔——看看你，终于把时光机弄好了，是吧？

JOEY

Seriously, you like it? This guy was sellin' 'em on 8th avenue and I looked at 'em and I thought, you know what I don't have?

说真的，你喜欢吗？我在第八街跟一个家伙买的。我看到的时候心里在想……“知道我缺什么吗？”

MONICA

A mirror?

镜子？

JOEY

Fine, make fun. I think it's jaunty.

很好，笑吧，我觉得很快活。

MONICA

Wow, for a guy who's recently lost his job, you're in an awfully good mood.

对一个刚失业的人来说，你心情很好呀。

JOEY

Hey, I'll be alright. I mean it's not like I'm starting from square one. I was Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives. Heh? I mean that's gotta have some kind of cache.

不要紧的，又不是说我要从零开始。我可是《我们的日子》里面的雷崔克大夫。那一定可以算是一项储备吧。

MONICA

Cache? Jaunty?

储备？快活？

JOEY

Chandler gave me word of the day toilet paper. I'm gonna get some coffee.

钱德送我一卷“每日一句”卫生纸。我要去点咖啡了。

PHOEBE

Hey.

嘿。

MONICA

Hey.

嘿。

RACHEL

Hey.

嘿。

PHOEBE

Oooh, so so so, did you read the book?

喔，怎么样怎么样，书看了没有啊？

MONICA

Oh my God, it was incredible.

天啊，简直不可思议。

PHOEBE

Didn't it like totally speak to you?

是不是完全说出你的心声？

RACHEL

Woah, woah, woah, what book is this?

哇喔，哇喔，哇喔，什么书啊？

MONICA

Rachel you have to read this book. It's called Be Your Own Windkeeper. It's about how women need to become more empowered.

瑞秋，这本书你一定要读。书名是《掌握自己的“风”》。是写女人需要拥有更多权力。

PHOEBE

Yeah and oh, and but there's, there's wind and the wind can make us Goddesses. But you know who takes out wind? Men, they just take it.

对，但是有……有风。风能够让我们变成女神。知道谁取走我们的风吗？男人，他们就那样拿走了。

RACHEL

Men just take out wind?

男人就这样拿走我们的风？

PHOEBE

Ya-huh, all the time, cause they are the lightning bearers.

对呀，一天到晚，因为他们是闪电使者。

RACHEL

Wow.

哇。

PHOEBE

Yeah.

对。

RACHEL

Well that sounds kinda cool, kinda like The Hobbit.

听起来蛮酷的，有点像是《哈比人》。

MONICA

It is nothing like the Hobbit. It's like reading about every relationship I've ever had, except for Richard.

那完全不像《哈比人》。那就像在读我有过的每一段关系，除了理查之外。

PHOEBE

Oh yes, no, Richard would never steal your wind.

哦对，不，理查绝不会偷走你的风。

MONICA

No.

不会。

PHOEBE

No, 'cause he's yummy.

不会，因为他很可口。

MONICA

Yes. But all the other ones.

对，但是其他的都会。

PHOEBE

Oh yes. Oh and, the part about how they're always like drinking from out pool of inner power, but God forbid we should take a sip.

哦对。还有，他们总是吸走……我们储存的内在力量，但我们连尝一口都不准。

JOEY

Anybody want a croan.

谁要吃根长条糕？

PHOEBE

Ok, this is a typical lightning-bearer thing. Right there, it's like, um, 'Hello, who wants one of my fallic shaped man cakes?'

这就是典型的闪电使者行为。就像是……“哈罗，谁要来一根我的老二形蛋糕？”

ESTELLE

Don't worry about it already. Things happen.

你别担心了，人有祸福的。

JOEY

So, you're not mad at me for getting fired and everything?

所以我这次被炒鱿鱼你不会生气吗？

ESTELLE

Joey, look at me, look at me. Do I have lipstick on my teeth?

乔伊，看着我，看着我。我的牙齿上有口红吗？

JOEY

No, can we get back to me?

没有，我们说回我，好不好？

ESTELLE

Look honey, people get fired left and right in this business. I already got you an audition for Another World.

听着，亲爱的，这一行到处有人被炒鱿鱼。我已经帮你找到了《另一个世界》的试镜机会了。

JOEY

Alright. Cab driver number two?

好棒。计程车司机乙？

ESTELLE

You're welcome.

不客气。

JOEY

But I was Dr. Drake Remoray. How can I go from bein' a neurosurgeon to drivin' a cab?

可是我演过雷崔克大夫。我怎么能从神经外科医生演到一个计程车司机？

ESTELLE

Things change, roll with 'em.

世事无常，随遇而安吧。

JOEY

But this is a two line part, it's like takin' a step backwards. I'm not gonna do this.

可是他只有两句话，就像在开倒车。我不要演这个。

ESTELLE

Joey, I'm gonna tell you the same thing I told Al Minser and his pyramid of dogs. Take any job you can get and don't make on the floor.

乔伊，这句话我也劝过明艾尔……跟他的金字塔狗群。有什么就做什么，不要随地乱搞。

JOEY

I'm sorry. See ya.

抱歉。改天见。

RACHEL

Oh, God, oh, God, I mean it's just so.

哦，天啊，哦，天啊，我是说，这好……

MONICA

Isn't it.

不是吗？

RACHEL

Uhh, I mean this is like reading about my own life. I mean this book could have been called 'Be Your Own Windkeeper Rachel'.

呃，这就像是读我自己的生活。我是说这书可以改做《掌握自己的风，瑞秋》。

PHOEBE

I don't think it would have sold a million copies but it would have made a nice gift for you.

我不认为那会卖一百万本……但当礼物送给你，倒满合适的。

ROSS

Hey you guys.

嘿，你们。

MONICA

Hey.

嘿。

ROSS

Uh, sweetie we've gotta go.

呃，甜心，我们得走了。

RACHEL

NO!

不！

ROSS

No?

不？

RACHEL

No, why do we always have to do everything according to your time table?

不，为什么我们做什么事都得照你的时间表来呢？

ROSS

Actually it's the movie theatre that has the time schedule. So you don't miss the beginning.

事实上，我们照的是电影院的时间表，这样我们才不会错过开头啊。

RACHEL

No, see this isn't about the movie theatre, this is about you stealing my wind.

不，你瞧，这不是关于电影院，这是关于你偷了我的风。

MONICA

You go girl. I can't pull that off can I?

加油，妹子。我说得不好，是不是？

ROSS

Excuse me, your, your, your wind?

对不起，你的……你的……你的风？

RACHEL

Yes, my wind. How do you expect me to grow if you won't let me blow?

对，我的风。你不让我吹，我怎么能成长？

ROSS

You, you know I, I don't, have a- have a problem with that.

你知道……我倒不会反对呀。

RACHEL

Ok, I just, I just really need to be with myself right now. I'm sorry.

好吧，我只是很需要自己一个人静一静。很抱歉。

PHOEBE

Um-um, um-um.

嗯-嗯，嗯-嗯。

RACHEL

You're right, I don't have to apologize. Sorry. Damnit!

你说得对，我不需要跟他道歉。抱歉，该死！

JOEY

What is it?

怎么了？不知道。

ROSS

I, I don't know, it's got all this stuff about wind and trees and there's some kind of sacred pool in it. I mean, I don't really get it but she's, she's pretty upset about it.

我……我不知道，是关于什么风呀树呀……里头还有什么神圣的池塘。我不是很懂，但她很生气。

JOEY

See, this is why I don't date women who read. Uh-oh.

所以我不跟看书的女人约会。哎呀。

ROSS

What, what's that?

那是什么？

JOEY

It's my VISA bill. Envelope one of two. That can't be good.

我的信用卡帐单，两封里的第一封。不可能是好事。

ROSS

Open it, open it.

打开来看看，打开来看看。

JOEY

Oh my God.

天啊。

ROSS

Woah.

哇喔。

JOEY

Look at this, how did I spend so much money?

你看看，我怎么会花这么多钱？

ROSS

Uh Joey, that's just the minimum amount due, that's your total due.

呃，乔伊，那只是最低应缴金额，总金额在这里。

JOEY

Ahh.

啊。

ROSS

What, woah, woah, $3500 at porcelain safari?

什么？哇喔，哇喔，你买了一套瓷器花了3500块钱？

JOEY

My animals. Hey the guy said they suited me, he spoke with an accent, I was all confused. I don't know what I'm gonna do.

我那些动物瓷器。那店员说很适合我，他讲话有口音，我被搞迷糊了。我不知道该怎么办。

ROSS

Well I guess you can start by drivin a cab on Another World.

我想你可以从《另一个世界》开计程车开始。

JOEY

What?

什么？

ROSS

That audition.

不是有试镜机会？

JOEY

That's a two line part.

那只有两句台词。

ROSS

Joey, you owe $1100 at I Love Lucite.

乔伊，你欠“我爱树脂”1100块钱。

JOEY

So what.

怎么样？

ROSS

So suck it up man, it's a job, it's money.

所以就认命吧，老兄，那是工作，钱。

JOEY

Hey, look, I don't need you getting all judgemental and condescending and pedantic.

听着，我不需要你那一套说教。

ROSS

Toilet paper?

“每日一句”卫生纸？

JOEY

Yeah.

对。

ROSS

Look, I'm not being any of those things, ok, I'm just being realistic.

听着，我没有那样，我只是很实际而已。

JOEY

Well knock it off, you're supposed to be my friend.

别说了，你是我的朋友才对。

ROSS

I am your friend.

我是你的朋友。

JOEY

Well then tell me things like, 'Joey you'll be fine,' and, 'Hang in there,' and, and, 'Somethin' big's gonna come along, I know it.'

那你就该劝我说“乔伊，没问题的”，“撑下去，你会得到大角色的，我知道”。

ROSS

But I don't know it. What I do know is that you owe $2300 at Isn't It Chromantic.

但是我不知道，我只知道你欠“缤纷世界”这家店2300大洋。

JOEY

Hey Ross, I'm aware of what I owe.

罗斯，我知道我欠多少。

ROSS

Ok, well then get some sense. I mean it took you what, 10 years to get that job, who knows how long it's gonna be till you get another.

那就讲一点道理啊。你奋斗了十年才得到那份工作，谁知道下一个机会还要等多久。

JOEY

Look, I don't wanna hear this right now.

我不想听这个。

ROSS

Huh, I'm just saying...

我只是说……

JOEY

Well don't just say.

那就别“只是说”，好吗？

ROSS

Ya know, maybe, maybe I should just go.

或许我该走了。

JOEY

Ok.

好。

ROSS

Ok. I'll see ya later. Just think about it, ok.

好，我们待会儿见，你考虑看看。

JOEY

I don't need to think about it. I was Dr. Drake Remoray. That was huge. Big things are gonna happen, you'll see. Ross, you still there?

我不需要考虑。我演过雷崔克大夫，那是大角色。大机会还会出现的，你等着瞧。罗斯？你走了吗？

EDDIE

Hey pal.

嘿，老兄。

CHANDLER

Ahhhh-gaaaahhh. Eddie what're you still doin' here?

啊啊啊啊——艾迪，你还在这里干什么？

EDDIE

Ah, just some basic dehydrating of a few fruits and vegetables. MAN ALIVE this thing's fantastic!

只是随便给一些蔬菜水果做脱水处理。老天爷，这玩意儿太棒了！

CHANDLER

Look Eddie, aren't you forgetting anything?

听我说，艾迪，你有没有忘记什么事？

EDDIE

Oh yeah, that's right, look I got us a new goldfish. He's a lot fiestier that the last one.

哦对，没错，看，我买了一条新的金鱼。它比上一条活泼多了。

CHANDLER

Maybe 'cause the last one was made by Pepperidge Farm. Look Eddie, isn't there something else you're supposed to be doing right now?

大概是因为上一条是饼干公司做的吧。艾迪，你现在是不是有件事必须要马上去做的？

EDDIE

Well, not unless it's got something to do with dehydrating my man because right now I'm a dehydrating maniac!

脱水吗？因为现在我是脱水疯子。

CHANDLER

Look you have to help me out here. I thought we had a deal. I thought by the time...

你必须要帮我忙。我以为我们讲好了……

EDDIE

Ah-ah-ah, you know what that is?

啊-啊-啊，你知道那是什么吗？

CHANDLER

Your last roommate's kidney?

你上个室友的肾？

EDDIE

That's a tomato. This one definitely goes in the display.

那是一颗蕃茄。这个一定要拿来当摆饰。

JOEY

Hey Gunther, let me get a lemonade to go.

嘿，甘瑟，一杯柠檬汁带走。

GUNTHER

Lemonade? You ok man?

柠檬汁？你没事吧？

JOEY

Ah, it's career stuff. I don't know if you heard but they killed off my character on the show.

只是事业不太顺利。不知道你听到没有，他们杀了我扮演的人物。

GUNTHER

Oh, that's too bad. How'd they do it?

真不幸，怎么杀的？

JOEY

I fell down an elevator shaft.

我掉下了电梯。

GUNTHER

That sucks. I was buried in an avalanche.

真逊，我是雪崩的时候被活埋的。

JOEY

What?

什么？

GUNTHER

I used to be Bryce on All My Children.

我以前演过《孩子们》的布莱。

CHANDLER

Daaahhhh!

啊——！

MONICA

Aaahhhhhhh! Aaahhhh!

啊啊啊啊啊！啊啊啊！

CHANDLER

Why must everybody watch me sleep? There'll be no more watching me sleep, no more watching.

干嘛大家都要看我睡觉？不准再看我睡觉了，不准。

MONICA

I wa-

我只是——

CHANDLER

Uuuh.

呃。

EDDIE

Hey man, check it out, I got some great stuff to dehydrate here. I got some grapes, got some apricots, I thought it would be really cool to see what happens with these water balloons.

嘿，老兄，你瞧，我有些好东西脱水哦。有葡萄，还有杏桃，还有我想看这些水球脱水后会是什么德性，一定很酷。

CHANDLER

Get out. Get out, get out, get out, get out, get out, get out.

出去，出去，出去，出去，出去，出去。

EDDIE

What?

什么？

CHANDLER

You, move out. Take your fruit, your stupid small fruit and GET OUT!

你，搬出去。带着水果，带着你愚蠢的水果，给我搬出去！

EDDIE

You, you want, you want me to move out?

你……你要我搬出去？

CHANDLER

Uh-huh.

嗯哼。

EDDIE

I uh, I gotta tell you man, I mean, that's uh, it's kinda out of the blue, I mean don't you think?

我得告诉你，老兄，这有点突然，你不认为吗？

CHANDLER

This is not out of the blue, this is smack dab in the middle of the blue.

这不是突如其来，是突如其来到极点了。

EDDIE

Ohhhh. Relax, take it easy buddy. Tell me twice, you want me to go? Alright, alright, guess I'll be back for my stuff.

哦——轻松一点，放轻松，兄弟。你不用告诉我两次。好吧好吧，会有人来拿我的东西。

EDDIE

But if you think for one second I'm leaving you alone with my fish, you're insane Jack!

不过你以为我会让我的鱼跟你独处，那你就疯了，杰克！

CHANDLER

You want some help.

要我帮忙吗？

EDDIE

No help required Chico. [reaches into the tank and grabs the fish and puts it in his pocket]

不用了，奇哥。（把手伸进鱼缸抓起鱼放进口袋）

JOEY

All the way to the airport huh? You know that's over 30 miles, that's gonna cost you about so bucks.

一直开到机场？那超过了三十哩，我估计大概要“王元”哦。

CASTING GUY

Excuse me, that's 50 bucks.

对不起，你说错了，是五十元。

JOEY

What?

什么？

CASTING GUY

Five oh dollars.

五十……元。

JOEY

Ohh, you know what it is? It's smudgy 'cause they're fax pages. Now when I was on Days of Our Lives as Dr. Drake Remoray, they'd send over the whole script on real paper and everything.

哦，你知道为什么吗？字糊了因为是传真的。当我在演《我们的日子》演雷崔克大夫的时候……他们会送来用纸打印的整个剧本来。

CASTING GUY

That's great.

那太棒了。

JOEY

And, and just so you know, if you wanted to expand this scene like, like have the cab crash or somethin', I could attend to the victims 'cause I have a background in medical acting.

还有，还有，如果你想加长这场戏，像是出了车祸之类的……我可以照顾伤患……因为我有医疗演出的背景。

CASTING GUY

Ok, listen, thanks for coming in.

好了，听着，谢谢你来。

JOEY

No no, uh, don't thank me for comin' in. Uh, at least let me finish. Uh, we could take the expressway but uh, this time of day you're better off taking the budge. You were goin' for the word bridge there weren't ya. I'll have a good day. [gets up and leaves]

不，别谢谢我来。至少让我演完。呃，我们可以走高速公路……但这种时候，我们还是走“轿”比较好一点。你们的意思是“桥”对不对？祝我今天愉快。（起身离开）

PHOEBE

Ok, question number 28, have you ever allowed a lightning bearer to take your wind? I would have to say no.

第28个问题，“你有没有让闪电使者取走过你的风？”我必须说，没有。

MONICA

And I would have to say pah-huh.

而我必须说……哈！

PHOEBE

What?

什么？

MONICA

Do you not remember the puppet guy?

你不记得那个演木偶戏的吗？

RACHEL

Yeah you like totally let him wash his feet in the pool of your inner power.

对，你完全让他在你内在力量的池子里大洗其脚呀。

MONICA

And his puppet too.

还有他的木偶。

PHOEBE

Yeah ok, well at least I didn't let some guy into the forest of my righteous truth on the first date.

对，但至少不在我第一次约会……就让人家进入我的正义真理的森林里啊。

MONICA

Who?

谁呀？

PHOEBE

Paul.

保罗。

MONICA

Oh.

哦。

RACHEL

Ok, ok, ok, moving on, moving on, next question. Ok number 29, have you ever betrayed another goddess for a lightning bearer? Ok, number 30.

好了，好了，好了，继续，继续，下一个问题。好，第29题，“你曾经为一个闪电使者……背叛过另一位女神吗？”第30题。

MONICA

Woah, woah, woah, let's go back to 29.

哇喔，哇喔，哇喔，回到第29题。

RACHEL

Not uh, not to my recollection.

不……不记得有。

MONICA

Huuh, alright, Danny Arshak, ninth grade. Oh, c'mon Rach, you know the bottle was totally pointing at me.

好吧，艾丹尼，九年级。哦，少来，瑞秋，你知道那瓶子完全指向我的。

RACHEL

Only 'cause you took up half the circle.

那是因为你的体积太庞大了。

PHOEBE

Listen to you two. It's so sad. Looks like I'm gonna be going to the goddess meetings alone.

听你们两个说的，真是悲哀。这下子看来我真该一个人去参加女神会议了。

RACHEL

Well not when they find out you slept with Jason Hurley an hour after he broke up with Monica.

如果别人发现何杰森跟莫妮卡才分手了一个小时……你就跟他上床了呢？

MONICA

One hour? You are such a leaf blower.

一小时？你可真会挑拨离间。

JOEY

Oh hey uh, be careful with that 3-D last supper, Judas is a little loose.

哦，嘿，呃，小心那个立体的最后晚餐，犹大有点松了。

ROSS

[enters] Oh my God, what's goin' on?

（走进来）哦，天啊，这怎么回事？

JOEY

They're takin all my stuff back. I guess you were right.

他们来拿东西回去，我想你说得对。

ROSS

No look I wasn't right, that's what I came here to tell you. I was totally hung up on, on my own stuff. Listen, I'm someone who needs the whole security thing, ya know. To know exactly where my next paycheck is coming from but you, you don't need that and that's amazing to me. I could never do what you do Joey.

不，听着，我说得不对，我就是来告诉你这个的。因为那天我的心完全在我自己的事情上头。你听我说嘛，需要那个什么狗屁安全感的人是我，我需要完全掌握下次薪水从哪儿来，你又不用担心这个。我觉得你真了得。我永远都无法像你，乔伊。

JOEY

Thanks Ross.

谢了，罗斯。

ROSS

Yeah. And you should hold out for something bigger. I can't tell you how much respect I have for you not going to that stupid cab driver audition.

对，你应该等待更好的机会。你不知道我多么敬重……你不去那个计程车司机的试镜。

JOEY

I went.

我去了。

ROSS

Great, how did it go?

太棒了，结果呢？

JOEY

I didn't get it.

我没得到角色。

ROSS

Good for you.

你在实现梦想。

JOEY

What?

什么？

ROSS

You're livin' the dream.

你在实现梦想。

JOEY

Huh?

啊？

ROSS

All right then.

好吧。

JOEY

[movers removing a glass parrot] Oh, not my parrot.

（搬运工拿走一只玻璃鹦鹉）哦，别带走鹦鹉。

ROSS

What?

什么？

JOEY

I can't watch this.

我看不下去了。

ROSS

[approaching the mover holding the parrot] Hey hold on, hold on. How much for the uh, how much to save the bird?

（走向拿着鹦鹉的搬运工）嘿，等等，等等。这要多少……救那只鸟要多少钱？

MOVER

1200.

1200。

ROSS

Dollars? You spent $1200 dollars on a plastic bird?

美金？你花1200美金买只塑胶鸟？

JOEY

Uhhh, I was an impulse buyer, near the register.

呃，那是一时冲动，它在收银机附近。

ROSS

Go ahead, go ahead with the bird. Ok, do you have anything for around 200?

去吧，把鸟带走吧。好了，你有没有大约两百左右的？

MOVER

Uh, the dog. [points to a big porcelain greyhound]

呃，那只狗。（指向一只大瓷灵缇）

ROSS

Huh.

哈。

MOVER

Yeah.

对。

ROSS

I'll take it. My gift to you man.

我买了，送给你，老兄。

JOEY

Thanks Ross. I really like that bird though... I'll take the dog though.

谢了，罗斯。我真的很喜欢那只鸟……不过这只狗……。

RACHEL

Here are your cakes.

你们的蛋糕。

MONICA

We didn't order cake.

我们没点蛋糕。

RACHEL

No, I know, they're from me. Look you guys this is not good. I mean we have enough trouble with guys stealing our wind without taking it from each other.

不，我知道，是我请的。听着，两位，这样不好。我是说被男人偷走我们的风就够惨了……何苦再自相残杀呢？

MONICA

You're right.

你说得对。

RACHEL

You know.

你知道。

PHOEBE

I love you goddesses. I don't ever want to suck your wind again.

我爱你们，女神们。我再也不会吸走你们的风了。

RACHEL

Thank you. So are we good?

谢谢，我们和好了？

MONICA

We're good.

和好了。

RACHEL

We're good?

和好了？

PHOEBE

Yeah.

对。

RACHEL

Ok, let me take these cakes back 'cause they're gonna take that out of my paycheck.

好，那我把蛋糕送回去，因为他们会从我薪水里扣。

CHANDLER

[enters] Ding dong, the psycho's gone.

（走进来）叮咚，那个疯子走了。

MONICA

Are you sure this time?

这次你确定？

CHANDLER

Yes, yes I actually saw him leave. I mean that guy is standing in the window holding a human head. He is STANDING IN THE WINDOW HOLDING A HUMAN HEAD!

对，我亲眼看到他离开的。那家伙拿着一个人头在窗口。他拿着一个人头！

EDDIE

[enters] Check it out man, I tore it off some mannequin in the alley behind Macy's.

（走进来）你瞧，老兄，我在梅西百货后面巷子里的模特儿身上摘下来的。

MONICA

There is no alley behind Macy's.

梅西后面没有巷子。

EDDIE

So I got it in the junior miss department, big diff. Anyway check it out man, it's gonna make a hell of a conversation piece at our next cocktail party, huh pal?

所以我是在少女部摘的，有什么差别呢？你瞧瞧，老兄，这样我们下次鸡尾酒会就有得聊了，是吧老兄？

CHANDLER

Our next cocktail party?

“下次的鸡尾酒会”？

EDDIE

Yeah, you know, put chips in it, we'll make like a chip chick.

对呀，可以拿来放洋芋片，弄成一个洋芋片小妞儿。

CHANDLER

Eddie, do you remember yesterday?

艾迪，你记得昨天发生的事吗？

EDDIE

Uh yes, I think I vaguely recall it.

呃，是的，我想我模模糊糊的记得。

CHANDLER

Do you remember talking to me yesterday?

那么你还记得昨天你跟我说的话吗？

EDDIE

Uh, yes.

呃，是的。

CHANDLER

So what happened?

发生了什么事？

EDDIE

We took a road trip to Las Vegas man.

我们跑去拉斯维加斯，老兄。

CHANDLER

Oh sweet Moses.

天啊。

MONICA

So on this road trip, did you guys win any money?

那么这次的旅行你们有没有赢钱呢？

EDDIE

Naah, I crapped out, but Mr. 21 over here he cleans up, 300 bucks, check it out he buys me these new shoes, sweet huh?

没有，我输光了，但这位21点先生赢了300块，他买这双新鞋给我，很棒吧？

MONICA

Nice.

很棒。

EDDIE

Yeah. Well see ya upstairs. See ya pals.

对。楼上见了，再见。

PHOEBE

Is anyone else starting to really like him?

还有别人开始很喜欢他吗？

CHANDLER

May I help you?

需要我效劳吗？

EDDIE

Why doesn't my key work and what's all my stuff doin' downstairs?

我的钥匙为什么不能用了？我的东西为什么都在楼下？

CHANDLER

Well, I'm, I'm sorry... [Eddie forces his head in the door] Ahhh. Have we met?

呃，我很抱歉……（艾迪把头挤进门缝）啊。我们有见过吗？

EDDIE

It's Eddie you freak, your roommate.

我是艾迪，呆子，你的室友。

CHANDLER

I, I'm sorry, I uh [unchains the door and opens it all the way] I already have a roommate. [Joey turns around in the leather recliner]

我……对不起……（解开门链把门完全打开）我已经有室友了。（乔伊从皮躺椅上转过身来）

JOEY

Hello.

你好。

CHANDLER

Yeah, he's lived here for years, I don't, I don't know what you're talkin' about man.

对，他住很多年了，我不知道你在说什么，老兄。

EDDIE

No he, he moved out and I moved in.

不，他搬出去以后我才搬进来的。

CHANDLER

Well I, I think we'd remember something like that.

如果是那样的话，我们应该记得才对。

JOEY

I know I would.

我知道我会。

EDDIE

Well that's uh, that's a good point. Um ok, well, uh, I guess I got the wrong apartment then. I, I'm, look, I'm, ya know, I'm sorry, I'm terribly sorry.

说得有道理。嗯，好，那我想我记错房子了。两位，对不起，非常对不起。

JOEY

Hey no problem.

嘿，没关系。

CHANDLER

See ya. [shuts the door] Goodbye you fruit drying psychopath. So you want me to help you unpack your stuff?

再见了。（关上门）再会了，干燥水果的疯子。乔伊，要我帮你打开行李吗？

JOEY

Na, na I'm ok. Oh and uh, just so you know, I'm not movin' back in 'cause I have to. Well, I mean, I do have to. It's just that that place wasn't really, I mean, this is...

不用了。哦，呃，我只是想让你知道，我是不得已才搬回来的。嗯，是不得已没错……但是在那个地方并不是真的……我是说，这里……

CHANDLER

Welcome home man. [they hug and jump around]

欢迎回家，老兄。（他们拥抱并跳来跳去）

JOEY

A little foos?

小试一下身手？

CHANDLER

Absolutely.

没问题。

JOEY

What happened to the foosball?

这颗球怎么了？

CHANDLER

Ah that's a cantaloupe.

那是颗哈密瓜。

CLOSING CREDITS

片尾字幕

CHANDLER

Hey look, are we gonna have to bring this out every time Ross comes over?

嘿，乔伊，每次罗斯来我们都要把这玩意拖出来吗？

JOEY

He paid a lot of money for it.

他付了很多钱买这个。

CHANDLER

I'm gonna hold him a different way. Look I don't understand, if you hated it so much, why did you buy it in the first place?

我要用不同的方式来抱它。你真的那么讨厌这个，那当初为何要买它呢？

JOEY

Well, I had a whole ceramic zoo thing goin' over there but now, without the other ones, it just looks tacky.

我那边有一整个陶瓷动物园嘛，现在少了其他动物，看起来就很俗了。

CHANDLER

So is he housetrained or is he gonna leave little bathroom tiles all over the place? Stay. Good, STAY! Good fake dog.

它会控制大小便吗？还是会到处留下小瓷便便？别动。好，别动！好（假）狗。

END

结束