The One Where Dr. Remore Dies

Amber

Oh Drake.

崔克，抱歉，安珀。

Dr. Remore

I'm sorry Amber. It's just like Brad to have to have the last word.

布莱就是这样子，嘴巴不认输。

Ross

I'm sorry I'm late, what happened?

抱歉我迟到了，怎么样？

Monica

We, we just wanna see the end.

我们在看结局。

Amber

I want you Drake.

我要你，崔克。

Dr. Remore

I know you do but you and I can never be together that way.

这个我知道，但我们永远不可能会有结果的。

Amber

What?

什么？

Dr. Remore

There's something I never told you Amber. I'm actually your half-brother.

有件事我一直没有告诉你，我是你的异母哥哥。

Rachel

So what happens next?

那后来怎么样呢？

Joey

Well, I get the medical award for separating the siamese twins. Then Amber and I go to Venezuela to meet our other half-brother, Ramone. And that's where I find the world's biggest emerald. It's really big but it's cursed.

我帮连体婴动分割手术得了医学奖，然后我跟安珀去委内瑞拉找另外一个异母哥哥雷蒙，我找到了世界最大的翡翠，那真的很大，但是受了诅咒。

Chandler

God that is good TV.

天啊，真是个好节目。

Opening Credits

片头

Chandler

Phoebs, play with meeee.

菲菲，跟我玩嘛。

Phoebe

No. This game is grotesque. Twenty armless guys joined at the waist by a steel bar, forced to play soccer forever. Ahh, hello, human-rights violation.

不，这种游戏太畸型了。居然把二十个手无寸铁的男人串成一长条，被迫无止境地踢足球。简直是侵害人权嘛。

Chandler

Ya know Phoebs, don't feel so bad for 'em. After they're done playing, I break out the little plastic women and everybody has a pretty good time.

不要为他们难过，等他们踢完足球之后，我把小塑胶妞拿出来，大家都会非常开心的呀。

Phoebe

Why don't you play with your roommate?

你干嘛不跟你室友玩？

Chandler

Ah he's a, he's a not a big fan of foosball.

他不爱玩桌上足球。

Phoebe

Uh oh, ooh, are we not getting along with the new boy?

你跟那个新来的处得不好吗？

Chandler

No he's, he's alright, just uh, he spends most of his time in his room.

不是啊，他很好，只是多数的时间都关在房间里。

Phoebe

Maybe that's because you haven't taken the time to get to know him. Let's remedy that, shall we?

我想那也许是因为你没有花时间去了解他。我们来补救，好不好？

Chandler

We don't need to remedy that.

我们不需要补救。

Phoebe

Oh yeah, it'll be fun. [throws a tennis ball at Eddie's bedroom door]

要啊，会很好玩的。（把网球扔向艾迪的卧室门。）

Eddie

What was that?

什么事？

Phoebe

Hi, um, I just thought that it would be fun if the three of us had some beers and got to know each other.

我只是想我们三人来喝点啤酒，彼此了解一下，会很有意思。

Eddie

Yeah alright, that sounds alright.

好呀，听起来不错。

Phoebe

Oh good, ok. Oh nooo, I have to go because I'm late for my um, Green Eggs and Ham discussion group. Um tonight it's why he would not eat them on a train. Have fun bye.

不行，我得走了，因为我还要赶去……“绿蛋与火腿”的研讨会。今天晚上主题是……“为什么不在火车上吃呢？”好好玩，拜拜。

Chandler

That was so lame.

好滥的借口。

Phoebe

I know, yeah. Ok, talk to him. [leaves]

我知道。好，你跟他谈。（离开。）

Chandler

So, you uh, you think that Speed Racer guy gets a lot of tickets er?

你想那个赛车手被开了多少罚单啊……？

Eddie

That's good, that's good. So, so, so who broke up with who?

好笑……谁甩了谁啊？

Chandler

What're you kidding? I broke up with her. She actually thought that Sean Penn was the capital of Cambodia.

我甩了她呀，她真的以为西恩潘是高棉的首都。

Eddie

That's good man, when everybody knows that the uh, the capital of Cambodia is uh...

有没有搞错？大家都知道高棉的首都是……

Chandler

Well it's not Sean Penn.

不是西恩潘。

Eddie

Not Sean Penn. Alright, I, I've got a funny one, alright. My last girlfriend Tilly. Ok, we're eating breakfast, right, and I made all these pancakes, there was like 50 pancakes right. And all of the sudden she turns to me, alright, and she says, 'Eddie.' I say, 'yeah,' she says, 'Eddie, I don't want to see you anymore.' And it was literally like she had reached into my chest, ripped out my heart, and smeared it all over my life, ya know. And now there's like this incredible abyss, ya know, and I'm falling and I keep falling and I don't think I'm ever gonna stop. [finishes laughing] That uh, wasn't such a funny story, was it?

好，我有个好笑的。好，我前任的女友叫提莉，我们在吃早餐，我做了很多薄松饼，大概有五十多个吧。突然间她转过来，她就说“艾迪……”，我说“嗯”，她说“艾迪，我不想再跟你见面了”。那就好像是她把手伸进我的胸膛里，挖出了我的心，把我的生活搞得乱七八糟的。那就像我面前有一个深渊，我就一直往下掉，我就一直往下掉，永无止境地往下掉。这个故事不太好笑，是不是？

Phoebe

And a crusty old man said I'll do what I can and the rest of the rats played moroccas. That's it, thanks, good night.

个坏脾气老头说我尽量，其他老鼠开始摇响葫芦。唱完了，谢谢，晚安。

Richard

Phoebe's got another job, right?

菲比有别的工作吧？

Rachel

Great set tonight Phoebs.

唱得很好，菲菲。

Phoebe

I know.

我知道。

Ross

Well, we should probably get going.

我想我们该走了。

Richard

Um, we should go too, I got patients at 8 in the morning.

我们也该走了，明天早上八点还有病人。

Monica

Ya know, I was thinking. Ya know how we always stay at your apartment? Well, I thought maybe tonight we'd stay at my place.

知道吗？我在想，我们老是在你那边过夜，或许今晚改住我那边啊。

Richard

I don't know, I don't have my jammies.

我不知道，我没有带我的睡衣。

Monica

Well, maybe you don't need them.

或许你不需要。

Ross

My baby sister, ladies and gentlemen.

我的小妹妹，各位先生女士。

Monica

Shut up, I'm happy.

闭嘴，我很快乐。

Phoebe

Oh, this is so nice. Alright I have to make a speech. I just wanna say that of all the guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot, I like you the best.

这太棒了，我必须说几句话。我只是想说，在莫妮卡交过的为数众多的男友当中，我最喜欢你了。

Richard

Oh, thank you Phoebs. That's very sweet.

谢谢你，菲菲，嘴真甜。

Phoebe

Ok.

好。

Richard

Hear that? She likes me best, and apparently there've been a lot.

听到了吗？她最喜欢我，而且你显然阅人无数。

Monica

Not a lot, Phoebe's kidding, Phoebe's crazy.

没有啦，菲比在说笑吧，菲比是疯子。

Rachel

Phoebe's dead.

菲比死定了。

Tilly

Hi.

我来找一位曼艾迪。

Chandler

Hi.

他现在不在，我叫钱德。

Tilly

I'm looking for Eddie Minowick.

要我帮你留话还是……拿鱼缸呢？

Chandler

Oh, uh, he's not here right now, uh, I'm Chandler, can I take a message, or, or a fishtank?

谢谢。

Tilly

Thanks.

请进。

Chandler

Oh, oh, c'mon in.

我叫提莉。

Tilly

I'm Tilly.

看你这个样子，他一定跟你提过我了。

Chandler

Oh.

提过，你的大名在一段令我惊心动魄的对话曾经出现过。

Tilly

I gather by that oh that he told you about me.

他这人有点激烈吧？

Chandler

Oh yeah, your uh, name came up in a uh, conversation that terrified me to my very soul.

对呀，请问你艾迪是不是有一点……

Tilly

He's kind of intense huh?

有一点怎么样？

Chandler

Yes. Hey, can I ask you, is Eddie a little...

……有点乡村？

Eddie

[walks around corner] A little what?

（从拐角走过来）有一点怎么样？

Chandler

Bit country? C'mon in here you roomie.

快进来呀，室友。

Eddie

Hello Tilly.

提莉。

Tilly

Eddie, I just came by to drop off your tank.

艾迪，我只是把鱼缸送过来。

Eddie

That's very thoughtful of you. It's very thoughtful.

你想得真是周到，非常体贴。

Tilly

Well, ok then. I'm gonna go. Bye.

就这样了，我要走了，再见。

Eddie

Bye-bye.

再见。

Chandler

Bye.

再见。

Chandler

So, we gettin' a fish?

那么我们养鱼了，是不是？

Eddie

You had sex with her didn't you?

你们上床了，是不是？

Joey

Phoebs, check it out, check it out, check it out, check it out.

菲菲，你看……

Phoebe

Oh, ooh, Soap Opera Digest, oh that's one of my favorite digests.

“肥皂剧文摘”，我最喜欢的文摘之一。

Joey

Page 42, page 42, page 42.

42页……

Phoebe

Ok, ok, ok. Ooh, hey 'new doc on the block, Days of Our Lives' Joey Tribbiani.' Ooh, cool picture.

“医界新秀‘我们的日子’崔乔伊。”好酷的照片。

Joey

Ooh, I look good.

我好帅。

Phoebe

Hey is this true, that you write a lot of your own lines?

这是真的吗？很多台词都是你自己写的吗？

Joey

Uh, well, kinda yeah. Like, remember last week when Alex was in the accident? Well the line in the script was, 'If we don't get this woman to a hospital, she's going to die.' But I made it, ' If this woman doesn't get to a hospital, she's not gonna live.'

可以这么说啦。像你记得上礼拜亚历出了事那一集吗？剧本上的台词是“我们不送这女人去医院的话，她会死的”，被我改成了“这个女人不去医院就医的话，她会活不成的”。

Phoebe

Ohh, ok, I see what you did there. Aren't you afraid though, that the writers are gonna be kinda mad when they read this?

我懂你做了什么了。那你不会担心那些编剧看到这篇文章会有点生气吗？

Joey

Huh? Never really thought about the writers. The scripts just kinda come to my house. But you know what? This makes me look good, which makes the show look good, which makes the writers look good so how could they be mad about that?

我倒没有考虑到那些编剧，剧本总是送来我家。但你知道么？这样让我很有面子，也因为这样子，节目有面子，也因为这样子，编剧有面子，他们怎么可能会生我的气呢？

Writer

Makes up most of his lines. Son-of-a-. Yeah, well, write this jerkweed.

他编了自己大部份的台词。很好……写这个，混蛋。

Joey

I fall down an elevator shaft? What the hell does this mean, I fall down an elevator shaft?

我跌下了电梯井？这什么意思？我跌下了电梯井？

Delivery Guy

Uhh, I don't know, I just bring the scripts.

我不知道，我只是送剧本过来。

Joey

They can't kill me, I'm Francesca's long lost son.

他们不能杀我，我是兰琪失散的儿子呀。

Delivery Guy

Right. Could you sign this?

对。请你签收，好吗？

Joey

No. No way, I'm not signing that.

不，我才不签呢。

Delivery Guy

I don't think that's gonna affect the plot of the show.

我不认为对那个节目的剧情会有影响啊。

Joey

How can they do this to me?

他们怎么能这么对我？

Delivery Guy

Er, uh, I'm just gonna go. Sorry.

我要走了。很遗憾。

Monica

Well it wasn't that many guys. I mean, if you consider how many guys there actually are, it's a very small percentage.

也没有那么多个啦。我是说，如果你考虑到全世界有多少男人，那个比例非常小。

Rachel

Hey, it's not that big a deal, I was just curious.

没什么大不了的我只是……好奇罢了。

Ross

G'night.

晚安。

Richard

Night Richard. Good luck Mon.

晚安，理查。祝你好运，莫妮卡。

Monica

Alright, before I tell you, uh, why don't you tell me how many women you've been with.

好，我说之前，你先说你有过几个女人。

Richard

Two.

两个。

Monica

Two? TWO? How is that possible? I mean, have you seen you?

两个？那怎么可能？你知道你长得有多帅吗？

Richard

Well, I mean what can I say? I, I was married to Barbara for 30 years. She was my high school sweetheart, now you, that's two.

我能说什么呢？我跟芭芭拉做了三十年的夫妻，我们在高中就认识了，加上你，一共两个。

Monica

Two it is. Ok, time for bed, I'm gonna go brush my teeth. [goes in the bathroom]

那就两个吧。好，我要去刷牙了。（走进浴室。）

Richard

Woah, woah, no wait a minute now. C'mon it's your turn. Oh c'mon. Ya know, I don't need the actual number, just a ballpark.

你先等一等，来啊，换你了。快说呀，我也不需要知道确实的数目，只要差不多就可以了。

Monica

Ok, it is definitely less than a ballpark.

绝对比一个“大厦”还要少。

Rachel

Wow, I am so glad I'm not Monica right now.

真庆幸现在我不是莫妮卡。

Ross

Tell me about it. So what, what's your magic number?

那还用说。你的神奇数字是多少？

Rachel

Uhhhooo.

哦。

Ross

C'mon, you know everyone I've been with. All, both of them.

来嘛，我交过的你都认识，两个你都认识。

Rachel

Well, there's you.

有你。

Ross

Better not be doin' these in order.

最好不要说我是第一个。

Rachel

Ok, uh, Billy Dreskin, Pete Carney, Barry, and uh, oh, Paolo.

崔此利，柯彼得，贝利，还有……保罗。

Ross

Oh yes, the weenie from Torrini.

对，托里尼来的蠢蛋。

Rachel

Oh honey, are you jealous of Paolo? Oh, c'mon, I'm so much happier with you than I ever was with him.

蜜糖，你嫉妒保罗吗？拜托，跟他从没像跟你在一起这么快乐过。

Ross

Really?

真的？

Rachel

Oh please. That Paolo thing was barely a relationship. All it really was was just, ya know, meaningless animal sex. Ok, ya know, that sounded soooo much better in my head.

拜托，跟保罗那一段根本就不能算，那只能算是无意义的野兽的性关系。我这么说让我自己觉得好多了。

Chandler

Eddie, I didn't sleep with your ex-girlfriend.

艾迪，我没有跟你的前任女友上床。

Eddie

That's very interesting, ya know, 'cause that's exactly what someone who slept with her would say.

有意思，因为跟她上过床的人都会这么说。

Chandler

This is nuts. This is crazy. She came over for like two minutes, dropped off a fish tank, and left, end of story.

你疯了，你疯了，是不是？她只来了两分钟而已，丢下鱼缸就走了，就是这样。

Eddie

Where's Buddy?

巴迪在哪里？

Chandler

Buddy?

巴迪？

Eddie

My fish, Buddy.

我的鱼巴迪。

Chandler

There was no fish when she dropped it off.

她根本就没有带鱼来，里面没有任何东西。

Eddie

Oh, this is, this is unbelievable. I mean, first you sleep with my ex-girlfriend then you insult my inteligenct by lying about it and then you kill my fish, my Buddy?

这真令人难以置信。你先跟我的前任女友上床，以为我会笨到去相信你的谎言，然后你杀了我的鱼，我的巴迪？

Chandler

Hey I didn't kill your fish. Look Eddie...[puts his hand on Eddie's shoulder] Would you look at what I'm doin' here. That can't be smart. So we're just gonna take this guy right off ya and put him here in Mr. Pocket. Tangellon? [picks up the fruit and tosses it to Eddie, it hits Eddie in the chest and falls]

我没有杀你的鱼啊。你听我说，艾迪……你看我在做什么，好不好？那样太不聪明了。所以我们要把那个家伙给拿开，把它放到我的口袋先生里。来个橘子吧？（拿起水果扔给艾迪，正中艾迪胸口掉下。）

Richard

That's it? That's the giant number you were afraid to tell me?

就这样吗？害怕告诉我的庞大数目吗？

Monica

Well yeah.

那还好嘛。

Richard

Well, that's not bad at all. I mean, you had me thinkin it was like a fleet.

我是说，你害我以为你有一“托拉库”的人。

Monica

You really ok with it?

你真的觉得没关系？

Richard

Oh honey, I'm fine.

亲爱的，没关系。

Monica

Oh, yay. Ok about that two.

对了，关于那两个……

Richard

What? Alright, what about my two?

什么？好吧。

Monica

Well, it just seems like a really small number.

只是听起来真的好少喔。

Richard

Right, and...

对呀。

Monica

And, well, don't you have a lot of wild oats to sew? Or is that what you're doing with me? Oh my God, am I an oat?

我是说，难道你没有欲望到处去采花吗？你现在就是在那样对我吗？天啊，我是花吗？

Richard

Honey, you are not an oat. I, I mean I don't know, I, I guess I'm just not an oat guy. I've only slept with women I've been in love with.

亲爱的，你不是被采的花。我不知道，我猜我不是那一型的，我只跟我爱的女人上床。

Monica

But you've only slept with two people.

但是你只跟两个人上过床。

Richard

Right.

对。

Monica

Wow. Oh wow. You know I love you too, right.

你一定知道我也爱你吧？

Richard

Now I do. [they kiss and fall to the bed]

现在我知道了。（他们接吻，倒在床上。）

Rachel

Ross, Ross, please listen to me. Ross, you are so much better for me than Paolo ever was. I mean you care about me, you're loving, you make me laugh.

罗斯，拜托听我说。罗斯，你比保罗好太多了。我是说，你关心我，我心中有爱，你会逗我笑。

Ross

Oh, hey, if I make you laugh, here's an idea, why don't you invite Paulo over and have a little romp in the sack and I'll just stand in the corner and tell knock-knock jokes.

那样的话，我有个主意。你可以邀请保罗过来在床上野兽一下，而我就站在角落讲敲门的笑话。

Rachel

God, Ross, look, what you and I have is special, all Paolo and I ever had was...

罗斯，我们的感情很特别，我跟保罗有的只是……

Ross

Animal sex, animal sex? So what're you saying, I mean, you're saying that like, there's nothing between us animal at all. I mean there's not even like, uhm, a little animal, not even, not even like, like chipmunk sex?

“野兽的性关系”？所以你什么意思呢？你是说我们之间就没有任何“兽性”的东西吗？连一点点……一点兽性都没有？甚至连……像花粟鼠性？

Rachel

Ok, Ross, try to hear me. Ok, I, hey, I'm not gonna lie to you. Ok, it was good with Paolo.

拜托，你听我说，我不想对你说谎，跟保罗的性很好。

Ross

Knock-knock.

敲敲门。

Rachel

But, what you and I have is so much better. Ok, we have tenderness, we have intimacy, we connect. Ya know, I swear, this is the best I have ever had.

但我们两个之间的比那好多了。我们有温柔，我们有亲密，我们灵犀相通。而且我发誓，我从来没有过像你这么棒的。

Ross

Until now. [jumps on Rachel on the bed]

直到现在。（扑到瑞秋身上。）

Rachel

Oh, hi.

哦，嗨。

Monica

Hi. Richard just told me he loves me.

理查刚说他爱我。

Rachel

Oh my God, honey that's great.

天啊，太棒了。

Monica

I know. I just can't find...

我知道，我只是找不到……

Rachel

Oh they're in the top drawer. Hurry.

在第一个抽屉。快点。

Monica

You need one too?

你也要啊？

Rachel

Ooooh yeah.

对呀。

Monica

There's only one.

只有一个。

Richard

Monica.

莫妮卡。

Monica

Hi. Uh, we'll be right there, we're just trying to decide something. [shuts the bathroom door]

嗨，我马上来，我们……在决定事情。（关上门。）

Ross

[comes out of the bedroom] Rachel. [growls then sees Richard standing there] Hey.

（从卧室出来）瑞秋。（低吼，然后看到理查站在那里。）嘿。

Richard

Hey. They're just trying to decide something.

她们两个在决定事情。

Ross

Good, good, good. So, is uh, was your moustache, did, used to be different?

好，很好。你的……你的小胡子跟以前有不同吗？

Richard

No.

没有。

Ross

Oh. How do you uh, ya know, keep it so neat?

你怎么能够保持得那么整齐？

Richard

I have a little comb.

我有一把小梳子。

Ross

Oh. And what do you call that?

那个梳子叫什么？

Richard

A moustache comb.

胡子梳。

Rachel

Ok, I, I will do your laundry for one month.

我帮你洗一个月的衣服。

Monica

No.

不。

Rachel

Ok, ok, ok, I will, I will, I, hey, I will clean the apartment for two months.

我会……我会……我打扫两个月的房子，如何？

Monica

Alright, I tell you what, I'll give this to you now if you can tell me where we keep the dustpan.

只要你告诉我我们把畚箕放在哪里，这个我现在给你。

Rachel

Agghhh.

啊。

Ross

So were you in Nam?

你有没有打过越战？

Rachel

Rock-paper-scissors?

剪刀石头布？

Monica

Yeah.

没问题。

Rachel and Monica

One two three.

一、二、三。

Rachel

Yeesss.

太棒了。

Monica

Fine, go have sex.

很好，上床吧。

Richard

No. You have got it completely wrong. John Savage was deerhunter, no legs, John Voit was coming home, couldn't feel his legs.

不对，你完完全全搞错了。强沙维奇是“越战猎鹿人”，没有腿，强沃特是“归乡”，腿瘫痪了。

Ross

No, no way. You've got it totally the other way around my friend. John Voit was...

你完完全全搞反了，朋友。强沃特是……

Rachel

Honey.

亲爱的。

Ross

What, what oh....[Ross and Rachel go into her room]

什么？（罗斯和瑞秋走进她的房间。）

Richard

Shall we?

进去吧。

Monica

It's not gonna happen. They're doing it tonight, we can do it tomorrow.

今晚不可能了，今天晚上他们做，我们可以明天再做。

Richard

Uh, in the future, if I could see the schedule beforehand...

下一次的时间表可不可以先让我看看？

Chandler

So, when I woke up this morning, he'd stolen all the insoles out of my shoes.

我今天早上醒过来的时候，发现他偷了我所有的鞋垫。

Monica

Why?

为什么？

Chandler

Because he thinks I slept with his ex-girlfriend and killed his fish.

那家伙以为我睡了他前任女友而且还杀了他的鱼。

Phoebe

Why would you kill his fish?

你干嘛杀了他的鱼？

Chandler

Because sometimes, Phoebe after you sleep with someone, you have to kill the fish.

菲比，因为有时候你跟人上床之后，就必须要杀条鱼。

Rachel

Chandler honey, I'm sorry. Ok, can we watch Joey's show now please? [they turn on the TV]

钱德，宝贝……抱歉。可以看乔伊的节目了吗？（他们打开电视。）

Ross

Yeah.

好。

Monica

Wait, he's not here yet.

等等，他还没有到。

Rachel

So, he's on the show, he knows what happens.

他知道情节。

Ross

Yeah.

好。

Monica

Alright.

好吧。

Chandler

Oh, I'm fine about my problem now, by the way.

对了，我不在乎我的问题了。

Rachel

Oh good.

太好了。

Dr. Remore

Amber, I want you to know that I'll always be there for you, as a friend and as your brother.

安珀，你需要的时候永远有我，我是你一辈子的朋友跟兄弟。

Amber

Oh Drake.

崔克。

Dr Horton

Hard day huh? First the medical award, this.

辛苦了，先是医学大奖，然后是这个。

Dr. Remore

Some guys are just lucky I guess.

是呀，我猜有些人天生好运。

Intercom

Dr. Remore, report to first floor emergency, stat.

雷大夫，请到一楼急诊室报到。

Dr. Remore

Well then, uh, I uhh, guess that's me. Anyone else need to go on the elevator? Dr. Horton, Dr. Wong?

那么……我猜在叫我了。还有谁想坐电梯的？何大夫？华大夫？

Dr. Horton

No, no, they only said you.

他们只叫你一个人啊。

Dr. Remore

Oh, ok. Alright.

好吧。

Amber

I love you Drake.

我爱你，崔克。

Dr. Remore

Yeah, whatever. Oh no.

是呀，随便啦。不……

Amber

Drake, look out.

崔克，小心！

Dr. Remore

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

啊……

Monica

Did they just kill off Joey?

他们刚刚甩了乔伊？

Ross

No. [sound of Dr. Remore's body hitting the bottom of the shaft] Now maybe.

不。（瑞摩瑞医生的身体撞击电梯井底的声音）好像真的。

Ross

C'mon.

开门。

Rachel

Joey.

我们想跟你谈一谈。

Ross

Open up. We want to talk to you.

我不想谈。

Joey

I don't feel like talkin.

别这样了，乔伊，我们关心你。

Rachel

Oh c'mon Joey, we care about you.

我们很关心你。

Chandler

We're worried about you.

我们有些人真的很急呀。

Monica

And some of us really have to pee.

抱歉，乔伊。

Monica

Sorry Joey [runs to the bathroom]

（跑向浴室。）

Joey

Hey.

听着，很遗憾你的死真的很惨耶。

Phoebe

Listen, sorry about your death, that really sucks.

我们一看到就赶过来了。

Chandler

We came over as soon as we saw.

你怎么不告诉我们呢？

Ross

How could you not tell us?

我不知道，我有点希望没有人会发现。

Joey

I don't know, I was kinda hopin' no one would ever find out.

或许他们可以让你起死回生。

Rachel

Well, maybe they can find a way to bring you back.

他们说当找到我尸体的时候，我的脑袋已经摔得稀巴烂了。

Joey

Naa, they said that when they found my body, my brain was so smashed in that the only doctor that could have saved me was me. Supposed to be some kind of irony or somethin.

……而唯一救得了我的人是我，说是故意要看起来讽刺什么的。

Phoebe

But Joey, you're gonna be fine. You don't need that show, it was just a dumb soap opera.

乔伊，你不会有事的，你不需要那个节目，那只是个蠢的肥皂剧嘛。

Joey

Phoebe, this was the greatest thing that ever happened to me.

菲比，那是我这辈子最棒的事。

Phoebe

Yes, I was going to incorporate that. Oh good, here's Monica, she'll have something nice to say.

没错，我本来还要那样说的。很好，莫妮卡来了，她会说句好听的啦。

Monica

Um, I straightened out your shower curtain so you won't get mildew. What? To me that's nice.

我把你的浴帘拉直了以免发霉。怎么了？那是好事啊。

Chandler

It's gonna be ok. You know that?

不要紧的，你也知道嘛。

Joey

No, I don't. It's like, ya know, you work your whole life for somethin' and you think that when you get it it's never gonna be as good as you thought it would be. But this so was. Ya know, it changed everything. Like the other day, I got this credit card application, and I was pre-approved. Huh? I've never been pre-approved for anything in my life.

不，我不知道。像你奋斗了一辈子去追求，当你认为你办到的时候，永远不会像你想的一样好，不过这个是啊。它改变了一切。前几天呢，我去申请信用卡，我竟然被保送过关了。我这辈子从没被保送过关过。

Chandler

I'm sorry man.

很遗憾，老兄。

Rachel

Yeah, Joey honey, I don't know if this'll mean anything to you but you'll always be pre-approved with us.

乔伊，我不知道这对你有没有意义，但我们总是会保送你过关。

Joey

No, that means nothin to me.

不，那对我没有意义。

Chandler

Uhhhaahh.

啊。

Eddie

Pecan sandy, just made em.

大胡桃饼，刚出炉的。

Chandler

Yeah alright. What're these, raisins?

对，好。这是什么？葡萄干吗？

Eddie

Uh, sure, why not.

当然了，有何不可？

Chandler

[throws it across the room while Eddie's not looking] Listen Eddie, um, I've been thinking about our current living situation and uh, why are you smiling?

（趁艾迪不注意把饼干扔到房间另一边）听我说，艾迪，我想过我们目前住在一起的情况了。你为什么要笑？

Eddie

I got a little surprise, look. There's a new fishie. I named him uh, Chandler, you know, after, after you.

我有个小小的惊喜，我买了条新鱼。我叫它……钱德，以你为名。

Chandler

[looks in the fish bowl to see a fish cracker] Well that's not an, even a real fish. No, that's a goldfish cracker.

（看着鱼缸里的鱼形饼干）那根本不是一条真鱼啊，那是金鱼饼干耶。

Eddie

What's you point man?

你要说什么？

Chandler

Ok, good night. [walks towards his room] You big freak of nature.

晚安了。（走向自己房间）大自然爱好者。

Closing Credits

片尾

Ross

Hey.

嘿。

Richard

Hey.

嘿。

Ross

Hey.

嘿。

Richard

Ohh, brisk tonight.

今天晚上好冷，老兄。

Ross

Oh man.

哦。

Richard

Let's never speak of this.

我们都不要提了。

Ross

You got it.

没问题。

End

剧终