The One With Russ

Rachel

Joey, would you slow down? They're not gonna be sold out of papers at one o'clock in the morning.

你慢一点，报纸不会在半夜一点就全部卖光的。

Joey

I'm excited! I've never gotten reviewed before.

我好兴奋，第一次有我的剧评。

Monica

You were so amazing as the king. I was really impressed, I was.

你演国王演得太精采了，我真的好欣赏，真的。

Phoebe

Although, you know what? You might want to consider wearing underwear next time. Yeah, cause when you sat down on your throne you could kind of see your... royal subject.

不过你知道吗？我觉得下一次啊你应该考虑要穿穿内裤，因为当你登上宝座的时候，观众可以看到你的……龙根子。

Joey

Here it is, here it is. [reading from newspaper] The only thing worse than the mindless, adolescent direction was Joseph Tribbiani's disturbingly unskilled portrayal of the king.

有了，在这儿。“唯一比没大脑又孩子气的导演还要烂的是……崔乔伊对国王的超级逊诠释。”

Chandler

OK, look, that is one guy's opinion, alright. Phoebs, read yours.

那只是一个人的意见，菲比，念你的。

Phoebe

OK. [reading] The only thing worse than the mindless, adolescent direction...

“唯一比没大脑又孩子气的导演还要烂的是……”

Chandler

Does anyone have one from a different paper? Ross, read yours.

谁念一念别家报纸可以吗？罗斯，念你的。

Ross

I don't want to.

我不想念。

Rachel

Joey, honey, they don't know what they're talking about.

乔伊，蜜糖，他们不知道他们在讲什么。

Ross

Yeah.

那不一定。

Joey

Maybe they do. I've been doin' this ten years and I haven't gotten anywhere. There's gotta be a reason.

演了十年还混不出名堂，不是因为我是烂人是什么？

Ross

Oh c'mon. Maybe you're just, uhhh... paying your dues.

别这样嘛，你现在是耕耘阶段。

Joey

No, no, no, it.. it's too hard. It's not worth it. I quit.

不……太难了，这不值得，我不干了。

Monica

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait one minute. Wait a minute. I believe this will change your mind. [Reads from paper] In a mediocre play, Joseph Tribbiana was able to achieve brilliant new levels of... continued on page 153...[turns it] sucking.

等一下……包你听了会回心转意的。“在这出平凡的戏里崔乔伊成功地跃上另一美妙新境界……”（翻页）“……烂透了。”

Credits

片头

Joey

When I was little, I wanted to be a veteranarian, but then I found out you had to put your hands into cows and stuff.

小时候，我的志愿是当兽医，然后我发现我必须要把手伸到牛的什么里面。

Ross

[sullenly] Hiiiiii.

（闷闷不乐）嗨……

Phoebe

Are... are you OK?

你好吗？

Ross

Yeah, yeah, just a tough day at work. A stegosaurus fell over and trapped a kid. Whoa, whoa, I know this jacket, this is, th--Fun Bobby's jacket! Where is he, what. He, he's here, isn't he?

很好，只是水深火热的一天。剑龙倒了，困住一个小孩。我认得这件夹克，这是风趣巴比的夹克！他在哪里？他在这里，对不对？

Monica

Maybe.

或许。

Ross

Don't toy with me.

别这样嘛。

Fun Bobby

Geller!

盖勒！

Ross

Hey, Fun Bobby!

嗨，风趣巴比！

Fun Bobby

Hey. Whoa, hey, you've been working out, huh?

嘿，你有去健身啊？

Ross

Not at all! I love this guy. Hey, I was so psyched to hear you're back with my sister!

才没有呢！我爱这家伙。好高兴听到你又跟我妹妹在一起了。

Monica

You and me both.

我也是。

Fun Bobby

Hey, so what'd I miss, what'd I miss, c'mon?

我错过了什么吗？

Phoebe

Oh, we were just trying to make Joey feel better.

我们只是让乔伊觉得好过一点。

Fun Bobby

Hey, do you need me to pick you up?

需要我把你举起来吗？

Joey

No, I'm alright man. Really.

不，我没事了，真的。

Fun Bobby

No, I'm picking you up.

不，我要把你举起来。

Joey

Hey no, seriously, I don't need you to pick me... [Fun Bobby picks Joey up off the ground, bounces him. Joey laughs.] Alright! It still works.

不，真的，我不需要……好吧，还是有用。

Fun Bobby

OK, now before I go, does anybody else need to be picked up? [everyone raises their hands] I'm still gonna go.

在我走之前，有谁还要被我给举起来的？我还是走好了。

Monica

OK, I'll see you later babe.

待会儿见了，拜拜。

Fun Bobby

Uh, public display of affection coming up. You can avert your eyes. [kisses Monica]

我们要公开亲热，大家的眼睛请回避一下。（吻莫妮卡）

Fun Bobby

See ya. [exits]

再见。（离开）

All

Bye! See you later!

拜拜，待会儿见！

Phoebe

Fun Bobby is so great.

这个风趣巴比好棒。

Monica

Oh, isn't he? Oh, you know, I really think this time it may work with him. I mean, he just makes me feel so good and I've been feeling so lousy this last couple of months, no job, no boyfriend. Well, at least my cup is half full.

可不是嘛。我认为这一回我们会定下来，他让我觉得好棒。过去两个月我一直觉得好郁卒，没有工作，没有男友。至少现在我有一样了。

Phoebe

Half full of looooovvvvve.

那是用爱装的。

Monica

And for our two-week anniversary, he's gonna take me to his cousin's cabin for the weekend.

他为了庆祝我们的双周庆，周末要带我去他表哥的小木屋。

Phoebe

Cabin of loooooovvvvve.

全都是爱。

Rachel

We went through a lot of wine tonight, you guys. [walks over to table, holding five empty wine bottles]

我们今晚喝了好多酒。（拿着五个空酒瓶走到桌边。）

Monica

Really? I only had two glasses.

真的？我才喝了两杯。

Joey

I just had a glass.

我只喝了一杯。

Phoebe

Two.

两杯。

Rachel

I had one glass.

我喝了一杯。

Chandler

I had about a mugful in this lovely 'I got boned at the Museum of Natural History' mug.

我用这可爱的“我在自然历史博物馆看到骨头了”马克杯喝了一杯。

Rachel

OK, so that's... that's what, two bottles? And yet somehow we went through five?

这么说的话，顶多两瓶。可是这里有五个瓶子。

Ross

Oooooh.

哦。

Joey

[realizing what everyone else did a minute ago] Ooooooh.

（意识到大家刚才的意思）哦。

Monica

So what. So he drank a lot tonight.

那又怎么样，他今晚喝多了。

Ross

Yeah but, you know, now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever seen Fun Bobby without a... a drink in his hand.

是呀，不过现在我想起来……我记得风趣巴比酒不离手。

Phoebe

Yeah. Oh, OOOH, yeah, you know, did you notice how he always starts his stories with, um, OK, 'I was soooo wasted,' or, 'Oh, we were soooo bombed,' or, ummm, ooh, ooh, 'So I wake up, and I'm in this dumpster in Connecticut.'

“我喝得烂醉了”或者是“我们好醉了”，或者是“我醒来以后发现我在康州一辆清道车里面”。

Joey

Monica, have you ever been with him when he wasn't drinking?

莫妮卡，你们约会时他有没有喝过酒？

Monica

Well, we just happen to go to alot of places where you might drink. I mean, how do you go to a wine tasting without having a drink? Or... or to a club, or to the... zoo.

只是恰巧而已，我们去的地方都会喝酒的。我是说去品酒会怎么可能不来杯酒的，或者是去俱乐部，或是去……动物园。

Monica

Rach, does this have nonfat milk?

瑞秋，里面有没有脱脂奶？

Rachel

Ehhhummmm, I don't know, why don't you taste it.

不知道，你试试看吧。

Monica

[takes a sip] Mmmm, no.

（喝了一口）来不及了，抱歉，你喝过了。

Rachel

Oh well, too late, sorry, you already had some.

好吧。

Fun Bobby

[pulls out a flask] Whattaya say we make these, uh, coffees Irish?

（拿出小酒瓶）我们把这都弄成了爱尔兰咖啡，你们认为怎么样？

Phoebe

Um, cake.

蛋糕！

Rachel

Yeah, we're gonna... we're gonna get some cake. [Phoebe and Rachel go to counter.]

对，我们去拿蛋糕。（菲比和瑞秋去吧台。）

Monica

You know what? It seems like you've been making an awful lot of stuff Irish lately.

我发现你最近好像把很多东西都弄成爱尔兰式的。

Fun Bobby

Well, I would make them Belgian, but the waffles are hard to get into that flask.

我很想弄成比利时式的，可是饼干很难塞进酒瓶子里。

Monica

Bobby.

巴比。

Fun Bobby

Yeah, OK.

好吧。

Monica

Look, maybe this is none of my business, or maybe it is, I don't know... but, uh, I'm kind of worried about you.

听着，这或许不关我的事，或许有关，我不知道。我有点担心你。

Fun Bobby

OK, look, this isn't the first time somebody's said something to me about this, but, I don't know... I always made excuses about it, like... uhhh... 'I'm just a social drinker,' or, 'C'mon, it's Flag Day.'

这不是第一次有人跟我说过这件事情了。不过我老是为我自己找一些借口，像“跟朋友在一起才喝”或“来嘛，今天是国庆日”。

Monica

So, what are you saying now?

那你现在怎么说呢？

Fun Bobby

I guess I'm saying, I'll try and quit. I kinda like that you worry about me. [they hug]

我猜我要说……我戒戒看。我喜欢你担心我的样子。（他们拥抱。）

Phoebe

[comes back to couch, with cake] Sooo, what's goin' on, huh?

（拿着蛋糕回到沙发）发生什么事了？

Fun Bobby

I am gonna try and quit drinking.

我要试着戒酒了。

Phoebe

[sad] Ooohh, why?

（难过）为什么？

Chandler

Hey.

嘿。

Joey

Hey.

嘿。

Monica

Hey.

嘿。

Phoebe

Hey.

嘿。

Chandler

Guess who's back in show business.

猜谁又回演艺圈了？

Phoebe

Ohh, ohh, Lorne Green?

罗伦·格林？

Chandler

No, no, Phoebs. You know why? Cause he's dead.

不是，菲比，你知道为什么吗？他死了。

Phoebe

Oh, no.

哦，不。

Chandler

OK, I guess this is gonna seem kinda bittersweet now, but... Joey, that's who.

我猜这似乎有点苦乐参半……是乔伊老弟耶。

Joey

Yeah, my agent just called me with an audition for Days of Our Lives!

是啊，我经纪人叫我去“我们的日子”试镜看看。

Phoebe

Oh, well, we have to celebrate. You know what we should do? We should do, like, a soap opera theme.

那我们必须要庆祝，应该开个肥皂剧主题派对。

Chandler

Hey, yeah... we could all sleep together and then one of us could get amnesia.

对，我们可以一起上床然后其中一个人失去记忆。

Phoebe

Hey Rach, what time do you get off? We're all gonna do something tonight.

瑞秋，你什么时候下班？晚上一起做点什么。

Rachel

Ummmm.... well, actually I'm already done, but I... I kinda got plans.

事实上，我下班了，但我有其他计划。

Monica

[gasps] You have other friends?

（吸气）你有别的朋友？

Rachel

Yeah... I, uhh... I have a... I have a date.

对，我……我有约会。

Monica

What?

什么？

Joey

With a man?

跟男人？

Rachel

What? What is so strange about me having a date?

怎么？我有约会有什么奇怪的？

Joey

What about Ross? I mean, are you still mad at him cause he made that list about you?

那罗斯怎么办？你还在为列单子的事在跟他生气，是不是？

Rachel

Noooo, no, I'm not mad at him. I'm.. I'm not really anything at him anymore.

不……我不生气了。我对他再也不怎么了。

Monica

What are you talking about?

你在胡说些什么？

Rachel

I don't know. Whatever I was feeling, I'm... not.

我不知道。不管我从前怎么样，我……

Phoebe

But you guys came so close.

你们就差一点点咧。

Rachel

Oh, I know, I'm sorry you guys. You're just gonna have to get used to the fact that I will not be dating Ross.

我知道，对不起啦，各位你们只得习惯……我不会跟罗斯约会这个事实。

Rachel

Here he is. Hi. Guys, this is Russ.

他来了。各位，这是纳斯。

Russ

[sounding like Ross] Hhhhiiiii.

（声音像罗斯）嗨。

Estelle

Stop saying you're not talented, you're very talented. It's just with the bird dead and all, there's very little act left. Oh, honey, give me a break, will ya? [a knock on the door] Oooh, ooh, I'll talk to you later.

不……我不是说你没才华，你非常有才华。只是那只鸟死了之后剩下的戏就很少了。蜜糖，放我一马，好吗？（敲门声）我等会儿再打给你。

Estelle

Well, there's my favorite client. So tell me darling, how was the audition?

我最喜爱的客户来了。告诉我，亲爱的，试镜结果如何？

Joey

Well, I think it went pretty well. I.. I got a callback for Thursday.

我觉得进行得满顺利的，他们要我周四复试。

Estelle

Joey, have you ever seen me ecstatic?

乔伊，你见过我心醉神迷吗？

Joey

No.

没有。

Estelle

Well, here it is. [She almost smiles.]

那你见识看看。（她几乎笑了。）

Joey

OK, uh.... listen, there's something I want to talk to you about. The network casting lady...

对了，有件事我想跟你谈谈。电视台的选角小姐……

Estelle

Oh, isn't Lori a doll?

罗莉是不是很棒？

Joey

Oh yeah, yeah, she's great, but... I kinda got the feeling that she was sort of... coming on to me. And I definitely would get the part if I would've... you know... if I would have sent the Little General in.

对……她很棒。可是……我有点觉得她好像对我有那么一点点意思。我觉得如果我想得到那个角色的话，就要……派我的“小将军”出马。

Estelle

Oh, I see. Well, I'm just gonna put in a call here and we'll find out what's goin' on and straighten it out. [picks up the phone] Yeah, hi, Lori please. [pause] Hi darling. So how 'bout Joey Tribbiani for the part of the cab driver, isn't he terrific? [pause] Uh-huuuuh. [pause] Uh-huuuuh. OK, doll. Talk to you later. [hangs up] [to Joey] Yeah, you're gonna have to sleep with her.

我懂了我现在就打个电话……把事情搞清楚，看看究竟是怎么回事。（拿起电话）你好啊，请接罗莉。亲爱的，崔乔伊适不适合计程车司机那个角色？他是不是棒透了？好，我们等会儿再谈。（挂断）（对乔伊）对，你必须跟她上床。

Rachel

What's the matter?

怎么了？

Monica

It's Fun Bobby.

是风趣巴比。

Rachel

What, isn't he sober?

怎么？他又喝酒了？

Monica

Oh, he's sober alright. Just turns out that Fun Bobby was fun for a reason.

他是没喝酒。只是我发现风趣巴比风趣是有原因的。

Rachel

Ohhh, OK.

哦，好吧。

Monica

Alright, here you go, sweetie. [hands Fun Bobby his coffee]

拿去吧，甜心。（把咖啡递给风趣巴比。）

Fun Bobby

Thanks. You wanna hear something funny?

谢了，要不要听一个有趣的故事？

Monica

Oh God, yes!

天啊，要！

Fun Bobby

There are no hardware stores open past midnight in the Village.

只要一过了午夜，这附近的五金行就全都关门了。

Phoebe

That is funny.

好好笑哦。

Fun Bobby

I needed to buy a hammer the other night, and I'm out walkin' around the neighborhood but apparently there are no hardware stores open past midnight in the Village.

前几天晚上我需要买一把榔头，我就出去在这附近逛了一逛。这附近所有的五金行过了午夜之后都关门了。

Monica

Ahhh, hey honey? Don't you have to be at your interview now?

甜心，你不是该去面试了吗？

Fun Bobby

Oh yeah. See you guys. [leaves]

是呀。各位再见了。（离开。）

Chandler

Bye..... ridiculously dull Bobby.

拜拜……无聊至极的巴比。

Monica

Oh.... my.... God.

老天啊。

Phoebe

It's not that bad.

他还没那么糟啦。

Monica

Not that bad? Did you hear the hammer story?

没那么糟？你没有听到那个故事吗？

Phoebe

OK, OK, don't get all squinky.

别那么挑剔嘛。

Rachel

Maybe it was just the kind of story where you have to be there.

也许你应该身历其境才会觉得好笑啊。

Monica

But I'm gonna be there... for the rest of my life. I mean, I can't break up with him. I'm the one who made him quit drinking. He's dull because of me.

但我下半辈子……都会身历其境啊。我不能跟他分手，我叫他戒酒所以他无聊是因为我。

Phoebe

Alright, don't say that. He's probably always been dull. You just, you know, set it free.

好了，别这么说了。也许他一直很无聊，你只是……你只是把他解放了。

Russ

Hi.

嗨。

Chandler

[turning around] Hey Ross.... bahhhh!

（转身）嘿，罗斯……啊！

Rachel

Hi Russ, I've just got two more tables to clean and then we'll go, OK?

纳斯，我再擦两张桌子我们就可以走了，好吗？

Russ

OK, I'll just sit here and... uh... chat with your, uh.... friend-type....people.

好，我就坐这儿好了……跟你的……好朋友一起聊天。

Phoebe

Rachel? Um, hi.

瑞秋，你知道吗？

Rachel

Hi.

嗯？

Phoebe

OK, so, you know what you're doing, right?

好吧。

Rachel

Uhh.... waitressing?

擦桌子？

Phoebe

Well, yeah, but... no. I mean, umm... doesn't.... doesn't Russ just remind you of someone?

是又不是……纳斯会不会让你想起某个人来呢？

Rachel

[looks at him] Huh, Bob Saget?

（看他）巴布·西格？

Phoebe

[looks at Russ] Oh, yeah! No, no, no, no, oh, oh.

（看纳斯）对呀。

Phoebe

Oh, my, oh!

天呀！

Ross

What? What's wrong?

怎么了？

Phoebe

I, OK....

好吧……

Monica

She's just upset because she, uh, she buttered a spider into her toast this morning.

她心情不好是因为……她不小心把一只蜘蛛涂在吐司上了。

Ross

Alright.

好吧。

Chandler

[to Phoebe] Listen, Phoebs, this is gonna be OK. [introducing Russ and Ross] Ross, Russ. Russ, Ross.

（对菲比）听我说，菲菲，这不要紧的。（介绍纳斯和罗斯）罗斯，纳斯，纳斯，罗斯。

Russ

Hi.

嗨。

Ross

Hi.

嗨。

Russ

Are you a, uh, friend of Rachel's?

你是……瑞秋的朋友？

Ross

Yes, yes I am. Are you a, uh, a friend of Rachel's?

是，我是。你是……瑞秋的朋友吗？

Russ

Actually, I'm a... kind of a.... you know, a... date-type... thing... of Rachel's.

事实上，我是……瑞秋的约会对象。

Ross

A date.

约会？

Russ

Yeah, I'm her date.

对，她的约会对象。

Ross

Oh, oh, you're... uh... you're, oh you're the date.

哦，你就是约会对象。

Chandler

You know, this is actually good, because if we ever lose Ross, we have a spare.

其实这也满好玩的，因为万一我们失去了罗斯，还有一个备用的。

Russ

Oh, you are the, uh... paleontologist.

你是那个……古生物学家。

Ross

Yes, yes I am. And you are a....

对，我是。你是……

Russ

Periodontist.

牙科医师。

Monica

See? They're as different as night and... later that night.

瞧，现在他们简直是黑夜跟……更黑的夜。

Ross

Well, I am going to, uh... get a beverage. It was nice, nice... uh... meeting you.

我现在要去……拿杯饮料。很高兴……很高兴认识你。

Russ

Ditto.

彼此。

Ross

I, uh, well... I... I met Russ.

我……我见过纳斯了。

Rachel

Oh.

哦。

Ross

Hey, I didn't know we were, uh, seeing other people.

我不知道我们……边跟别人交往。

Rachel

Well, we're not seeing each other, so....

我们又没有在交往，所以……

Ross

Well, uh, for your information, there's a woman at the museum, who's curator of moths and other... uh... winged things... who's, uh, let it be known that she is drawn to me much like a... well, you know. But so far I've been keeping her at bay, but, uh, if this is the deal...

我告诉你好了，我们馆里有个女的……跟其他有翅生物……她明显地表示她喜欢我，就像是……你知道嘛。我到现在还跟她保持距离，但是如果你要这样的话……

Rachel

Well, yeah, this is the deal.

对，我要这样。

Ross

OK, well, um, have a nice evening.

那好，祝你有愉快的一晚。

Rachel

Um, Russ, you ready?

纳斯，你好了吗？

Russ

Yeah.

好。

Rachel

Bye.

再见。

Monica

Bye.

再见。

Phoebe

Bye.

再见。

Ross

[upset] She's dating. She's dating.

（心烦）她在约会？她在约会？

Chandler

Yes, yes, but did you see who she was dating?

对，对，但你有看到她在跟谁约会吗？

Ross

What do you mean?

什么意思？

Monica

Do you not see it?

你看不出来吗？

Ross

See what? I don't know what she sees in... innn that goober. And it takes him, what? Like... like... I don't know, uhh... uhhh, hello.... a... week, to get out a sentence.

看什么？我真搞不懂她看中那驴蛋哪一点，讲完一句话要等一个礼拜。

Chandler

Yeah, it's annoying, isn't it?

是呀，烦死人了，是不是？

Ross

...Yeah.

……是呀。

Chandler

Hey.

嘿。

Joey

Hey.

嘿。

Chandler

Whoa, whoa, so I'm guessing you didn't get the part, or... uh, Italy called and said it was hungry.

我猜你没有得到那个角色……或是义大利来电说它饿了。

Joey

Well, the part's mine if I want it.

不，我要的话那角色就是我的。

Chandler

Oh my God!

老天啊！

Joey

Yeah, if I'm willing to sleep with the casting lady.

对呀，只要我愿意跟选角小姐上床的话。

Chandler

[not knowing how to react] Oh my... God?

（不知该如何反应）老天啊？

Joey

Ten years I've been waiting for a break like this Chandler, ten years! I mean, Days of Our Lives. That's actually on television.

我等了十年才等到这个机会，钱德！我是说“我们的日子”那真的会在电视上播出。

Chandler

So, what're you gonna do?

那你要怎么做？

Joey

Well, I guess I could sleep with her... I mean, how could I do that?

我可以跟她上床……但我怎么能够那么做呢？

Chandler

Well, I... I've got a pop-up book that told me everything I need to know.

我有一本教我关于性的一切的立体书。

Joey

I've never slept with someone for a part.

我从没有为了角色跟人家上床过。

Chandler

Well is she... [reaches into the cookie jar for a cookie, takes his hand out, covered with pasta sauce]

那么她是……（伸手到饼干罐拿饼干，手拿出来沾满了意面酱。）

Joey

Sorry.

抱歉。

Chandler

It's alright. Is she good-looking?

没关系。她长得好看吗？

Joey

Yeah, she's totally good looking. I mean, if I met her in a bar, or something, I'd be buying her breakfast. [pause] You know, after having slept with her.

好看，她长得非常的好看。若我在酒吧认识她的话，我一定会请她吃早餐……你知道，我是说跟她上床之后。

Chandler

Y'know, maybe this isn't such a big deal. Y'know, I mean, the way that I see it is you get a great job and you get to have sex. Y'know, I mean, throw in a tree and a fat guy and you've got Christmas.

依我看，你不但得到一份好工作还可以跟她上床。也许再加上一棵树跟胖子，就像圣诞树了。

Joey

I just... I just don't think that I want it that way though, y'know? I mean, let's say I do make it, alright? I'm always gonna look back and wonder if it was because of my talent or because of.. y'know, the Little General.

我只是不希望那样得到这份工作。就说有一天万一我成名好了，我会怀疑那到底是因为我的才华，还是因为我的……你知道，我的小将军。

Chandler

Didn't you used to call it the Little Major?

你以前不是叫它“小少校”的吗？

Joey

Yeah, but after Denise DeMarco, I had to promote it.

对呀，但是在上过狄丹妮后，它就升级了。

Waiter

Can I get you something from the bar?

两位要不要来一杯酒啊？

Monica

Yes, I would like something. [looks at Fun Bobby, changes her mind] No, no thank you.

好，我要点杯酒。（看着风趣巴比，改变主意）不，不，谢谢。

Fun Bobby

If... if you want to drink, it's OK with me, I've got to get used to it.

没关系，你想喝酒的话我没问题，我要习惯这种事。

Monica

No, no really. I.. I wouldn't feel right about it. [to waiter] Just some water.

不……真的，我冰箱里面的灯熄了。（对服务生）来杯水好了。

Fun Bobby

So the light went out in my refrigerator...

我会觉得很不舒服……来杯威士忌加冰块跟柠檬。

Monica

[grabs waiter as he's leaving] I'd like a scotch on the rocks with a twist.

（在服务生离开时拉住他）我会觉得很不舒服，来杯威士忌加冰块跟柠檬。

Chandler

Hey, we're having some fun now, huh, Ross? Wanna do another one, huh Russ? OK... eleven letters, atomic element number 101... ends in ium.

这个游戏很有趣吧，罗斯？我们再做一个好不好，洛斯？十一个字母，它的原子序号码是101，字尾是“IUM”。

Russ

Dysprosium.

是镝。

Ross

[condescendingly] Dysprosium? Try mendelevium.

（居高临下）什么是镐？我看试试门捷列夫吧。

Chandler

And weenie number two has it. Unless, of course, nine-down, Knights in White Satin was sung by the Doody Blues.

二号参赛者答对了。除非直九的“白缎之夜”是“杜迪蓝调”唱的。

Phoebe

You don't see it? You actually don't see it?

你真的看不出来吗？

Rachel

What?

什么？

Phoebe

OK honey, you're dating Ross.

你在跟罗斯约会。

Rachel

No, Phoebs. I'm dating Russ.

不，菲菲，我跟纳斯约会。

Phoebe

Russ is Ross. Russ... Ross!

纳斯就是罗斯，纳斯，罗斯！

Rachel

Steve... sleeve!

史提，史里！

Phoebe

OK, noone is named Sleeve.

没有人叫那种名字。

Rachel

Phoebe, what the hell are you talking about? Other than their names being similar, I'm sorry, I do not see what you're seeing.

菲比，你到底在鬼扯什么？除了名字相似之外，对不起，我看不到你看到的。

Ross

[to Russ] For your information, it's a card sharp, not a card shark.

（对纳斯）我老实告诉你好了……你错得不可能再错。

Russ

You could not be more wrong. You could try... but you would not be successful.

你可以试，可是你不会成功。

Chandler

OK, I'm gonna get some more coffee before the pinching and eye-poking begins.

我先倒杯咖啡，然后再回来看你们互戳眼睛。

Russ

I know what your problem is.

我知道问题在哪儿了。

Ross

Oh you do, do you?

是吗？

Russ

Um-hum, you're jealous.

你嫉妒。

Ross

Of... of what?

嫉妒什么？

Russ

You're jealous because I'm a real doctor.

你嫉妒我是个真正的医生。

Ross

Hey, you're a doctor of gums. That's the smallest body part you can major in. It's like day one, floss. Day two, here's your diploma.

你是牙龈的医生，那是人能够钻研的最小的人体器官。就像是第一天教你用牙线，第二天，这是你的文凭。

Russ

Hey, you listen.

你给我听着……

Ross

No, no, let me finish.

不，让我说完。

Russ

No, let me finish.

不，你让我说完。

Ross

No, you let me fini...

不，你让我说完……

Ross

Hi.

嗨。

Russ

Hi.

嗨。

Rachel

Ewww, ewww, ewww, ewww! [turns away]

呃！（转身离开。）

Rachel

Did Joey say what he was gonna go when he left?

乔伊走时有没有说打算怎么做？

Chandler

No, I don't even think he knew. Hey, would you sleep with somebody to get a great job?

没有，我想他自己也不知道。你会为一个很棒的工作跟别人上床吗？

Rachel

I don't know. Who would I have to sleep with?

我必须跟谁上床？

Chandler

Me.

我。

Rachel

Why would I have to sleep with you?

我干嘛得跟你上床？

Chandler

It's my game. You want the job or not?

这是我的事，这工作你到底要不要？

Chandler

Hey.

嘿。

Monica

Morning.

早安。

Ross

Where ya goin'?

你去哪里？

Monica

Bobby and I are going away for the weekend, remember?

巴比跟我要去小木屋度周末，记得吗？

Ross

Ooooohhhh.

哦。

Phoebe

What's with all the bottles of liquor?

带那么多酒干什么？

Ross

What's going on, is... uh, Bobby drinking again?

怎么了？巴比又开始喝酒了？

Monica

Oh no no, this is not for him, this is for me. That way he's still sober but I find his stories about shoelaces much more amusing.

不……这不是他喝的，这是给我的。这样他会很清醒，而我会觉得他的鞋带笑话好笑多了。

Rachel

Oh God, even his knock is boring.

天哪，他连敲门怎么都这么乏味啊。

Monica

Hi. I'll be ready in just a second.

嗨，我马上就好了。

Fun Bobby

Uh, can I talk to you a minute?

我可以跟你谈一谈吗？

Monica

Sure.

可以啊。

Fun Bobby

This is really hard for me to say.

这真的很难开口。

Monica

Oh God, you fell off the wagon.

天啊，你又开始喝酒了。

Fun Bobby

Oh, no, no, it's about you.

不是……是关于你的。

Monica

What about me?

我怎么了？

Fun Bobby

I think you may have a drinking problem.

我想你或许有酗酒问题。

Monica

What these? [holding up liquor bottles] Oh, these are, um, for.. cuts and scrapes.

这些？（举起酒瓶）这是……擦伤口用的。

Fun Bobby

Look, I am just not strong enough to be in a codependent relationship right now, OK?

我现在无法扯入一段相互依赖的关系当中，该死。

Monica

Oh... shoot.

哦。

Fun Bobby

Well, anyway, I hope we can be friends.

不管怎么样我希望我们还是朋友。

Monica

OK.

好。

Monica

Take care.

保重了。

Fun Bobby

You too.

你也是。

Rachel

What happened?

怎么了？

Monica

Well we... we kinda broke up.

我们……分手了。

Gang

Awwwwwwww.

哦。

Monica

[holding bottles] Does anybody want these?

（拿着酒瓶）这些酒谁要？

Chandler

I'll take one. Sometimes I like to hold stuff like this and pretend I'm a giant.

我拿一瓶，我有时候喜欢拿这种东西假装我是个巨人。

Joey

Hey.

嘿。

Gang

Hey!

嘿！

Ross

How'd the callback go?

复试结果怎么样？

Joey

It was unbelievable! I walked in there and she was all over me.

简直不可思议，我一进去她就开始对我上下其手。

Chandler

So what'd you do?

那你怎么办？

Joey

Well, I couldn't do it. I told her I didn't want to get the part that way.

我就是办不到。我告诉她我不想那样得到角色。

Ross

Good for you.

干得好……

Joey

But wait, wait, wait. Then, after I left her office, she caught up with me at the elevator and offered me an even bigger part.

等等，我离开她办公室之后，她追我追到电梯来，她说要给我一个更重要的角色。

Phoebe

So... and?

所以呢？

Joey

Soooooo... you are now looking at Dr. Drake Ramore, neurosurgeon, recurring in at least four episodes!

所以……各位面前站的是雷医生……是一位至少会在四集里面出镜的神经外科医师。

Gang

Allright!

太棒了！

Joey

Alright... I've got to go shower. [leaves]

好了……我去洗澡了。（离开。）

Russ

Hi.

嗨。

Chandler

Oh, hey.

嘿。

Phoebe

Hi.

嗨。

Russ

I guess you guys heard, Rachel dumped me.

你们听说我被瑞秋甩了吧？

Chandler

Yeah, I'm sorry man.

是呀，很遗憾啊，老兄。

Russ

Oh, all she said was that I remind her too much of somebody. You have any idea who she's talking about?

她说我会让她想起另外一个人。你们知道那个人是谁吗？

Phoebe

Oh I do, it's.... it's Bob Saget. She hates him.

我知道，是……沙巴西格，她恨他。

Russ

Oh.

哦。

Julie

Hey.

嘿。

Chandler

Hey!

嘿！

Phoebe

Hey, Julie! Hey, how are you doing?

嗨，朱莉，最近好吗？

Julie

Um, oh, I don't know. I mean, it's definitely weird not being with Ross, but I guess I'm doing OK. Actually I've got some of his stuff that he, um....

我不知道，没有了罗斯，的确很不对劲……但是我猜我还好啦。事实上我带了一些他的东西……

End

剧终