The One With the List

Rachel

Ross kissed me.

罗斯亲了我。

Monica

Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!

天啊，天啊，天啊！

Rachel

It was unbelievable!

很不可思议吧？

Monica

Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!

天啊，天啊，天啊！

Phoebe

Ok, all right. We want to hear everything. Monica, get the wine and unplug the phone. Rachel, does this end well or do we need to get tissues?

好了，现在全部从实招来。莫妮卡，去拔掉电话线，拿酒来。瑞秋，结局好不好？我们需不需要面纸？

Rachel

Oh, it ended very well.

结局非常好。

Phoebe

Oh.

哦。

Monica

[getting the wine] Do not start without me. Do not start without me.

（去拿酒）等我来再讲，等我来再讲。

Phoebe

Ok, all right, let's hear about the kiss. Was it like, was it like a soft brush against your lips? Or was it like a, you know, a "I gotta have you now" kind of thing?

好了，先谈谈那个吻。是像轻拂过你嘴唇的轻吻呢……还是像……“我现在就要你”的那种吻呢？

Rachel

Well, at first it was really intense, you know. And then, oh, god, and then we just sort of sunk into it.

刚开始很热烈，然后，天啊，然后我们就完全沉醉了。

Phoebe

Ok, so, ok, was he holding you? Or was his hand like on your back?

他抱着你吗？还是说他的手在你的背上呢？

Rachel

No, actually first they started on my waist. And then, they slid up, and then, they were in my hair.

不，他的手刚开始在我腰上，然后往上滑，最后落在我头发上。

Phoebe and Monica

Ohhhh.

哦。

Ross

And, uh, and then I kissed her.

然后我吻了她。

Joey

Tongue?

舌头？

Ross

Yeah.

对。

Joey

Cool.

酷。

Opening Credits

片头

Chandler

All right, check out this bad boy. 12 megabytes of ram. 500 megabyte hard drive. Built-in spreadsheet capabilities and a modem that transmits at over 28,000 b.p.s.

瞧瞧这个坏小子。12MG的RAM，500MG的硬盘，里面还有内建试算表的功能，再加上传输速度超过两万八BPS的数据机。

Phoebe

Wow. What are you gonna use it for?

哇，你要用它来干嘛啊？

Chandler

[doggedly] Games and stuff.

（固执地）玩游戏之类的。

Monica

[reading the paper] There are no jobs. There are no jobs for me.

（看报）根本没有工作，没有适合我的工作。

Joey

[reading over her shoulder] Wait, here's one. Uh, would you be willing to cook naked?

（从她肩膀后看）等一下，这边有一个。你愿意裸体做菜吗？

Monica

There's an ad for a naked chef?

有征裸体厨师的广告？

Joey

No, but if you're willing to cook naked, then you might be willing to dance naked. And then... [rubs his fingers together]

没有，但你如果愿意裸体做菜，你或许会愿意裸体跳舞，然后……（搓手指）

Ross

Hi.

嗨。

Phoebe

Hey, oh, so, um...how'd you make out last night?

嘿，对了，昨晚亲得怎么样了？

Ross

That, that is funny. That is painfully funny. No, wait. Wait, yeah, that's just painful.

那真风趣，风趣得很痛苦。不，等等，那只是痛苦而已。

Monica

Wait a minute. I thought last night was great.

等一下，我以为昨天晚上很棒耶。

Ross

Yeah, it was, but...I get home, ok, and I see Julie's saline solution on my night table. And I'm thinking to myself, oh my god, what the hell am I doing? I mean, here I am, I am with Julie, this incredible, great woman, who I care about and who cares about me, and I'm like, what, am I just gonna throw all that away?

没错，是很棒，但是当我回到家，我看到芙莉的食盐水放在我床边的桌上，我就想“老天啊，我到底在做什么呀？”我跟芙莉这么好的女人在一起，而我就那样抛弃一切吗？

Joey

You got all that from saline solution?

一瓶食盐水可以讲那么多？

Monica

We are talking about Rachel here. You and Rachel.

我们现在是在谈瑞秋，你跟瑞秋。

Ross

Believe me, I've been dreaming about me and Rachel for ten years now. But now, I'm with Julie, so it's like me and Julie, me and Rachel, me and Julie, me and... [Rachel enters, carrying a tray]... Rachel. Rachel, Rachel.

相信我，我梦想我跟瑞秋一起想了十年了。但现在我跟朱丽在一起，就好像我跟芙莉，我跟瑞秋，我跟芙莉，我跟瑞秋……（瑞秋端着托盘进来）瑞秋？瑞秋！

Rachel

[to Ross] Hey, you.

（对罗斯）嘿。

Ross

How are you?

你好吗？

Rachel

Good. How are you?

很好，你呢？

Ross

Good.

很好。

Julie

Hi, honey.

嗨，亲爱的。

Ross

Hi, Julie. [nervous] Hi, Julie. Julie, um, how are you?

嗨，朱莉。（紧张）嗨，朱莉，你好吗？

Julie

Good.

很好。

Ross

[uncomfortable] Good, so everybody's here. Everybody's good. So, were you gonna play something, Phoebe?

（不自在）很好，大家都在，大家都很好。你不是要弹什么吗，菲比？

Phoebe

Oh, well, actually.

哦，实际上……

Ross

[impatient] Play it.

（不耐烦）弹吧。

Phoebe

Ok, all right.

好，好吧。

Joey

Hey, Julie, I didn't know you wore lenses.

嘿，朱莉，我不知道你戴隐形眼镜。

Julie

What?

什么？

Ross

[to Joey] Ssshh.

（对乔伊）嘘。

Phoebe

Ok, um, hi, hello, hi, ok, so, um, this is a song about a love triangle between three people that I made up. Um, it's called, um, "Two of Them Kissed Last Night".

好了，嗨，哈罗，这是一首关于……我乱编的三角恋爱故事的歌，叫做“昨晚两个人接吻了”。

Phoebe

[singing] There was a girl, we'll call her Betty, and a guy let's call him Neil. Now I can't stress this point too strongly, this story isn't real. Now our Neil must decide, who will be the girl that he casts aside. Will Betty be the one who he loves truly? Or will it be the one who we'll call Ju...Loolie? He must decide, he must decide, even though I made him up, he must decide!

（唱）有个女孩，我们叫她贝蒂，有个男孩，咱们叫他尼尔。我再三强调这一点，这故事不是真的。现在尼尔必须决定他要放弃哪一个，是那个他真心相爱的贝蒂，还是我们称为露莉的女孩？他必须决定，他必须决定，虽然他纯属虚构，他必须决定！

Ratstatter

This is a nice resume. Nice, nice, nice. Muy impressivo.

你的资历很不错，可以说非常的可观。

Monica

So, Mr. Rastatter, what exactly does this job entail? The ad wasn't too clear.

这份工作到底是什么呢？广告写得很含糊。

Ratstatter

Mockolate.

麻克力。

Monica

I'm sorry?

什么？

Ratstatter

Mockolate. It's a completely synthetic chocolate substitute.

麻克力，一种完全人工的巧克力替代品。

Monica

Ohh.

哦。

Ratstatter

Go ahead. Try a piece. Yeah, we think that Mockolate is even better than chocolate.

别客气，试一块。对，我们认为麻克力比巧克力好吃的多了。

Monica

All right. Mmm-mmm.

好吧。（尝）嗯。

Ratstatter

Yeah?

嗯？

Monica

[disgusted, trying not to show it] I love how it crumbles. Now see, your chocolate doesn't do that.

（厌恶，努力不表现出来）我爱这碎碎的感觉，巧克力不会这样，不会。

Ratstatter

No, ma'am. Well, anyhoo, we should be getting our F.D.A. approval any day now, hopefully, in time for Thanksgiving. See, the way we look at it, chocolate already dominates most of your major food-preparation holidays: Easter, Christmas, what have you.

是的，女士。反正呢，这个食品药物管理局应该很快就会通过检验了，希望能够赶得上感恩节。你看，巧克力已经霸占了大部分跟大餐有关的节日，复活节、圣诞节等等。

Monica

[still chewing] Mmm-mmm.

（还在嚼）嗯。

Ratstatter

But, we're thinking, given the right marketing, we can make Thanksgiving the Mockolate holiday.

我们在想，只要行销搞好了，我们能让感恩节成为麻克力节。

Monica

Wow.

哇。

Ratstatter

Aren't you going to swallow that?

你不吞下去吗？

Monica

Just waiting for it to stop bubbling.

我只是在等泡泡停止。

Ratstatter

Yeah, isn't that great?

是不是很棒？

Monica

[with false enthusiasm] Mmm.

（虚情假意）嗯。

Ratstatter

Well, anyhoo, um, we are looking for a couple of chefs who can create some Thanksgiving-themed recipes. You think you might be interested?

我们在找几个厨师来搞一些新感恩节食谱，这下你有兴趣吗？

Monica

Abso...[swallows hard]...lutely. See, I love creating new recipes. I love Thanksgiving. And, well, now, I love Mockolate.

绝……对。我爱创新食谱，我爱感恩节，而现在呢，我爱麻克力。

Ratstatter

Really?

真的？

Monica

Especially the after taste, you know, I'll tell ya, that'll last ya till Christmas.

特别是那种口里的余味，可以缭绕到圣诞节。

Monica

How about Mockolate mousse?

麻克力慕斯怎么样？

Phoebe

It's not, it's not very Thanksgiving-y.

没什么……感恩节的味道。

Monica

Ok, how about pilgrim Mockolate mousse?

那感恩节善信慕斯呢？

Phoebe

What makes it pilgrim?

哪里像善信啊？

Monica

We'll put buckles on it.

放个大铁扣上去啊。

Rachel

Hey.

嘿。

Phoebe

Hey.

嘿。

Monica

Hey.

嘿。

Rachel

Did uh, Ross call?

罗斯来电话没？

Monica

No, I'm sorry.

没有，抱歉。

Rachel

Why didn't he call? He's gonna stay with Julie, isn't he? He's gonna stay with her and she's going to be all, "Hi, I'm Julie, Ross picked me, and we're gonna to get married, have a lot of kids and dig up stuff together."

他为什么不打来呢？他要跟朱莉在一起，是不是？他要跟她在一起，然后她会一副，“我是朱莉，罗斯选我，我们要结婚，生一堆孩子，然后全家一起去挖骨头。”

Phoebe

No offense, but that sounds nothing like her.

恕我冒犯，她不会这样讲的。

Ross

I don't know what to do. What am I gonna do? I mean, this, this is like a complete nightmare.

我不知道该怎么办，这简直是一场恶梦。

Chandler

Oh, I know. This must be so hard. Oh, no. Two women love me. They're both gorgeous and sexy. My wallet's too small for my fifties, and my diamond shoes are too tight.

“不，两个女人都爱我，两个都是旷世尤物，我的钱太多，皮包装不下，我的钻石鞋太紧了。”

Joey

Hey, here's a thought, Ross. [reaches for the computer]

我有一个办法，罗斯。（伸手去碰电脑。）

Chandler

Don't touch the computer. Don't ever touch the computer.

别碰我的电脑，永远都别碰。

Joey

Ross, listen. I got two words for you. Threesome.

三人行。

Chandler

Ok, all right, look. Let's get logical about this, ok? We'll make a list. Rachel and Julie, pros and cons. Oh. We'll put their names in bold, with different fonts, and I can use different colors for each column.

“瑞秋和芙莉，优缺点”，名字用不同字型的粗体字，然后每一栏可以用不同的颜色来写上。

Ross

Can't we just use a pen?

不能够用笔就好了吗？

Chandler

No, Amish boy.

不可以，原始人。

Joey

Ok, let's start with the cons, 'cause they're more fun. All right, Rachel first.

我们就先从缺点开始，那比较好玩一点。先列瑞秋。

Ross

I don't know. I mean, all right, I guess you can say she's a little spoiled sometimes.

我不知道。我是说，好吧，我想你可以说她有时候有一点娇纵。

Joey

You could say that.

可以这么说。

Ross

And I guess, you know, sometimes, she's a little ditzy, you know. And I've seen her be a little too into her looks. Oh, and Julie and I, we have a lot in common 'cause we're both paleontologists, but Rachel's just a waitress.

有时候……她有点像傻大姐。我觉得她有点太注重她的外表。朱莉跟我们有很多共同点，因为我们都是古生物学家。但是瑞秋她只是个女侍。

Chandler

Waitress. Got it. You guys wanna play Doom? Or we could keep doing this. What else?

女侍，好了。你们要玩“毁灭”吗？我们也可以继续。还有呢？

Ross

I don't know.

我不知道。

Joey

Oh, her ankles are a little chubby.

她的脚踝有一点胖。

Chandler

Ok, let's do Julie. What's wrong with her?

换朱莉了，她有什么不好的？

Ross

[long pause] She's not Rachel.

（长停顿）她不是瑞秋。

Monica

Ok, this is pumpkin pie with mockolate cookie crumb crust. This is mockolate cranberry cake, and these are mockolate chip cookies. Just like the Indians served.

这是麻克力饼屑南瓜馅饼，这个是麻克力红莓蛋糕，而这些是麻克力饼干，跟印第安人的一样。

Rachel

Oh my god.

天啊。

Monica

Oh my god good?

天啊，是好吃的？

Rachel

Oh my god, I can't believe you let me put this in my mouth.

天啊，我不敢相信你给我吃这个。

Phoebe

Oh, oh sweet Lord! This is what evil must taste like!

这一定是万恶之味！

Chandler

I'm telling you this thing won't print. Yes, I pressed that button like 100 times. You know, for a hot line you are not so hot. What? What is that in the background? Are you watching Star Trek?

我说这个玩意儿不能印。对，那个按钮我按了一百次了。对热线而言，你没有那么热。什么？我听到了什么？你在看“星舰迷航记”？

Joey

[to Ross] Hey, so how'd it go with Julie? Did you, did you break her heart?

（对罗斯）你让朱莉心碎了吗？

Ross

Yes, it was horrible. She cried. I cried. She threw things, they hit me. Anyway, I did the right thing.

是啊，好可怜，她哭，我也哭。她丢东西，打到了我。我这么做是对的。

Chandler

[in phone] So, Spock actually hugs his father?

（打电话）史巴克真的拥抱了他爸爸吗？

Rachel

Hey, do you guys have...[sees Ross, pauses]...hi.

你们有没有……（看到罗斯，停顿）嗨。

Ross

Hi.

嗨。

Rachel

[sees his coat on] Where you goin'?

（看到他的外套）你去哪儿了？

Ross

I uh, I just got back from uh, from Julie's.

我……刚从朱莉那边回来。

Rachel

[dejected] Oh.

（沮丧）哦。

Ross

No, no, uh, it's not what you think. It's um the other thing.

不是你想的那样，是别的事。

Rachel

Well, what's the other thing, what do I think?

什么是别的事？我以为是什么？

Ross

Well, uh.

这个……

Joey

He broke up with Julie. Well, go hug her, for god's sakes.

他跟朱莉分手了。老天在上，去抱抱她呀。

Rachel

Really?

真的？

Ross

Really. It's always been you, Rach.

真的。我爱的一直是你，瑞秋。

Rachel

Oh, god.

哦，天啊。

Joey and Chandler

Ohhh.

哦。

Rachel

Oh, oh, this is good, this is really good.

这真好，这真的很好。

Ross

I know, I know, it's, it's almost...[turns around, sees Chandler and Joey] What do you say we go take a walk, just us, not them?

我知道……（转身，看到钱德勒和乔伊）我们出去走一走怎么样？就我们两个人？

Rachel

Let me get my coat.

我去拿外套。

Ross

Ok. No, hey, whoa, whoa, I'll get your coat.

好，不，我来帮你拿外套。

Rachel

Ok, he's goin' to get my coat. He's goin' to get my coat. Oh my god, you guys. I can't believe this. This is unbelievable. [notices Chandler's computer screen] What's that?

他去帮我拿外套，他去帮我拿外套。天啊，我真不敢相信，这太令人难以置信了。（注意到钱德勒的电脑屏幕）那是什么？

Chandler

[nervous] What? Nothing.

（紧张）什么？没什么。

Rachel

What's that? What? I saw my name. What is it?

那是什么？我看到了我的名字，是什么？

Chandler

No, no, see? See? [the printer starts to run] Hey, it's printing. [to Joey, rattled] Hey, it's printing!

不，你看……（打印机开始运转）嘿，它在印了。（对乔伊，慌乱）嘿，它在印了！

Rachel

Well what is it? Let me see.

那是什么嘛？给我看。

Ross

Hey, someone order a coat?

嘿，有人订外套吗？

Rachel

Ross, Chandler wrote something about me on his computer and he won't let me see.

罗斯，钱德在电脑上写了关于我的事，还不让我看。

Ross

He won't? [remembers what it is] He won't! Because, isn't that, isn't that the, the short story you were writing?

他不让？因为，那是不是……你正在写的短篇故事？

Chandler

Yes, yes it is, short story, that I was writing.

对，那是一篇我正在写的……短篇故事。

Rachel

And I'm in it? Then let me read it.

里面还有我？那就念给我听好了。

Chandler, Joey, and Ross: No!

不！

Rachel

Come on.

来嘛。

Joey

Hey, uh, why don't you read it to her?

好啦干脆你念给她听好了。

Chandler

[through gritted teeth] Alright. [clears his throat] "It was summer, and it was hot. Rachel was there. A lonely gray couch. 'Oh, look,' cried Ned, and then the kingdom was his forever. The end."

（咬牙切齿）好吧。（清嗓子）“那个时候是夏天，天气很热，瑞秋在那里。寂寞的灰沙发。然后他就是永远的国王了。剧终。”

Ross

That's it? That's all you wrote? You're the worst writer in the whole world.

就这样？你只写了这样？你是全世界最烂的作家。

Rachel

All right, you know what? This isn't funny anymore. There's something about me on that piece of paper and I want to see it.

好了，我不再觉得好玩了。那张纸上写了关于我的事情，而我想要看一看。

Ross

No, you don't.

不，不可以。

Rachel

All right, you know what, that's fine. If you guys want to be children about this, that's fine. I do not need to see it. [Rachel grabs the paper and runs across the room, reading it to herself.]

好吧，你们要这么孩子气的话没关系。我根本就不需要看。（瑞秋抓住纸跑到房间另一边，自己读了起来。）

Rachel

What is this? Ross, what is this?

这是什么？罗斯，这是什么？

Chandler

Good luck.

祝你好运。

Ross

Ok, just, just remember how crazy I am about you, ok?

你只要记得我多为你疯狂。

Rachel

Kind of ditzy? Too into her looks? Spoiled?

“有点傻大姐”？“太注重外表”？“是有一点娇纵”？

Ross

Now that's a little spoiled. He was supposed to type "little", the idiot.

他应该加上“有一点”才对，这个白痴。

Rachel

Just a waitress?

“只是个女侍？”

Ross

No, that, that was, I mean, as opposed to uh, the uh, ok. Is this over yet Rach?

那是……我是说，相对于……好吧，你念完了没有，瑞秋？

Rachel

Oh! I do not have chubby ankles!

我的脚踝一点都不肥！

Ross

No, no, wait, ok, ok, look at the other side. Look at Julie's column.

不，等等，你看另一边嘛，你看看朱莉那一栏。

Rachel

She is not Rachem. What the hell's a Rachem? Is that some stupid paleontology word that I wouldn't know because I'm just a waitress.

“她不是瑞琪”？瑞琪是什么东西啊？那是什么？因为我是女侍，而不懂得愚蠢古生物用语吗？

Ross

No, Rach, come on. Rach! Rach, no, no! She's not Rachel, she is, she is not, Ra--Rachel?

不，瑞秋，不要这样。瑞秋！她不是……她不是……瑞秋？

Chandler

My diary! My diary, that's brilliant. I should have told her it was my diary, she never would have made me read her my diary.

我的日记！我的日记，太聪明了。我应该说那是我的日记，她绝对不会逼我念我的日记。

Monica

You know, that's true. You'd be a great person to have around the day after an emergency.

那倒是真的，你很适合在紧急事件的第二天放马后炮。

Phoebe

I... I cannot believe Ross even made this list. What a dinkus.

我真不敢相信罗斯列了单子，真是个混蛋。

Joey

Hey, cut him some slack. It was Chandler's idea.

放他一马吧，那是钱德的主意。

Phoebe

What?

什么？

Monica

What?

什么？

Chandler

Oh good, I was hoping that would come up.

很好，我正在希望你提呢。

Monica

This was your idea?

这是你的主意？

Phoebe

What were you thinking?

你在想什么？

Chandler

[squirming] All right, let's get some perspective here, ok? These things, they happen for a reason.

（坐立不安）拜托，你们想一下，事出必有因。

Monica

Yeah. You!

对，是你呀。

Chandler

All right, Pheebs, back me up here, ok? You believe in that karma crap, don't you?

菲比，帮我一下，好吗？你相信宿命那套狗屁，对吧？

Phoebe

Yeah, by the way, good luck in your next life as a dung beetle.

对，祝你下辈子当大便虫好运。

Ross

Rach! Whoops! Rach, hey, open up, please!

瑞秋！哦，瑞秋，开门，求你了！

Rachel

[coldly] When somebody does not buzz you in, Ross, that means go away. That doesn't mean please climb up the fire escape.

（冷冷地）当别人不开门让你进来的时候，那就表示“走开”，那并不表示请你爬防火梯上来。

Ross

I just wanna read something. It's your pro list.

我只是想念一点你的优点给你听。

Rachel

Not interested.

我不感兴趣。

Ross

[reading his list] Ok, ok, number one: The way you cry at game shows. Number two: how much you love your friends. Number three: the way you play with your hair when you're nervous. Number four: how brave you are for starting your life over. Number five: how great you are with Ben.

（念他的单子）“第一，你看游戏节目时会哭。第二，你对你朋友的感情。第三，你紧张的时候玩你头发的样子。第四，勇敢地开始你的新生活。第五，你很会逗小班。”

Ross

Number six: the way you smell.

第六，还有你的香味。

Joey

[opens the drapes] Hey, Ross! What are you doin'?

（拉开窗帘）嘿，罗斯！你在干什么？

Ross

Hey, Joey. You wanna open the window?

嘿，乔伊。帮我开窗，好不好？

Joey

Oh, yeah, I do.

好呀，来。

Chandler

What are you doing out there?

你在外面干什么？

Ross

I am, uh, I am...

我……我……

Monica

Oh, you must be freezing. You know what you need? How about a nice steaming cup of hot Mockolate?

天啊，你一定冷死了，知道你需要什么吗？来杯热腾腾的麻克力怎么样？

Ross

Rach, come on, open up. Rach, come on, come on, Rach. You got to give me another chance.

瑞秋，别这样嘛，你再给我一次机会。

Rachel

No.

不。

Ross

No?

不？

Rachel

That's what I said.

我说不。

Chandler

Look, maybe we should go?

也许我们该离开一下？

Rachel

No, you guys, you really don't have to go, we're done talking.

不，你们真的不用走，我们已经谈完了。

Ross

Rach, come on, look, I know how you must feel.

瑞秋，拜托，我知道你一定……

Rachel

[near tears] No, you don't, Ross. Imagine the worst things you think about yourself. Now, how would you feel if the one person that you trusted the most in the world not only thinks them too, but actually uses them as reasons not to be with you.

（快哭了）不，你不，罗斯。想像一下你觉得自己最糟的地方，如果这个世界上你最信任的人……不只也这样想，而且用来当做不跟你在一起的理由，换了你会怎么样？

Ross

No, but, but I wanna be with you in spite of all those things.

就算是那样，我还是想要跟你在一起。

Rachel

Oh, well, that's, that's mighty big of you, Ross. [to the others] I said don't go!

你真是宽宏大量，罗斯。（对其他人）我说，别走！

Ross

You know what? You know what? If, things were the other way around, there's nothing you could put on a list that would ever make me not want to be with you.

你知道吗？如果今天是你列单子，不管你在单子上头写些什么，都阻止不了我跟你在一起。

Rachel

Well, then, I guess that's the difference between us. See, I'd never make a list.

我猜我们就是那一点不同，我不会去列单子。

Joey

[quietly] I never know how long you're supposed to wait in this type of a situation before you can talk again, you know? [Ross stares blankly at him] Maybe a little longer.

（轻声）每一次遇上这种情况，我都不知道要等多久才能开口。我再等一会儿好了。

Monica

Now, in some of these recipes, the quantities may seem just a little unusual, uh, like these coconut mockolate holiday nut bars. I've indicated four cups of coconut, and four cups of crushed nut, and only, uh, one tablespoon of mockolate.

我其中的一些食谱用的麻克力份量或许有点不寻常，像这个椰子麻克力干果棒，我上面写了四杯椰子、四杯碎干果……而只有一大匙的麻克力。

Ratstatter

Doesn't matter.

没关系。

Monica

What?

什么？

Ratstatter

Our FDA approval didn't come through. Something about laboratory rats.

食品药物管理局没有通过，实验室老鼠出了问题。

Monica

Oh, gosh, I'm sorry.

哦，天哪，真遗憾。

Ratstatter

Yeah, well, anyhoo, here is your check. [hands it to her] Thank you for all the trouble you went through. Um, listen, you didn't eat a lot of it while you were cooking, did you?

是呀。反正，这是给你的支票。（递给她）谢谢你出了这么多力。你做的时候没有吃很多吧？

Monica

Well, uh, I ate some.

我吃了一些。

Ratstatter

Oh, some, that's fine. Some is fine. Some is not a lot. So, it doesn't burn when you pee, does it?

一些，那还好，一些可以，一些不是很多。那你尿尿的时候没有灼痛的感觉吧？

(phone rings)

（电话铃响。）

Monica

Hello?

喂？

Ross

Hi.

嗨。

Rachel

[to Monica] Is that him again? Tell him I'd come to the phone, but my ankles are weighin' me down.

（对莫妮卡）又是他吗？告诉他我很想去接，可是我脚踝太粗走不动。

Monica

[to Ross] Listen, I... I don't think this is the best time.

（对罗斯）我想现在时机不对。

Ross

Look, can, can you do something for me?

你帮我一个忙，好不好？

Monica

Sure, what? Ok, ok. [hangs up the phone] [to Rachel] Music?

当然，什么事？好的。（挂断电话）（对瑞秋）音乐？

Radio

The next one's dedicated to Rachel from Ross. Rachel, he wants you to know he's deeply sorry for what he did and he hopes you can find it in your heart to forgive him. (With or Without You plays)

下一首是罗斯要点给瑞秋的歌曲。瑞秋，他要你知道他为他的行为深感抱歉，希望你能从心里原谅他。（《你若即若离》播放）

Radio

Uh, we've just gotten a call from Rachel, and she told us what Ross did. It's pretty appalling, and Ross, if you're listening, I don't wanna play your song anymore. Why don't we devote our time to a couple that stands a chance? Avery, Michelle's sorry she hit you with her car and she hopes you two will work it out.

我们刚接到瑞秋的电话，她告诉我们罗斯做了什么。真令人发指，罗斯，如果你在听，我不想再放你点的歌了。我们何不将时间留给还有机会的情侣？艾佛，米雪很抱歉用她的车撞你，她希望你们能够解决问题。

Ratstatter

Hi, thanks for coming in again.

谢谢你再度光临。

Monica

Oh, not at all. I have no morals and I need the cash.

不客气，我既无道德又需要钱。

Ratstatter

It's like I'm lookin' in a mirror. Anyway, they're called "fishtachios". They taste exactly like pistachios, but they're made primarily of reconstituted fish bits. Here, try one. You're not allergic to anything, are you?

我们真是一丘之貉。这个东西叫做“开心鱼”，吃起来是跟开心果一样的，但主要是用鱼肉重新压制的。来，试试看。你没有什么过敏问题吧？

Monica

Cat hair.

猫毛。

Ratstatter

Oh, sorry.

哦，抱歉。

End

剧终