The One With the Dozen Lasagnes

Chandler

No-no-no-no, we're done.

不-不-不-不，够了。

Opening Credits

片头

Monica

Aunt Syl, stop yelling! All I'm saying is that if you had told me vegetarian lasagna, I would have made vegetarian lasagna. (pauses, listens to person on phone) Well, the meat's only every third layer, maybe you could scrape.

Syl婶婶，别喊了！如果你告诉过我你要素面条，我就会给你做素的了。好吧，肉都在第三层，也许你能把它们刮下来。

(Camera moves to Chandler, Phoebe, Ross, and Joey sitting in living room)

（镜头移到客厅里坐着钱德勒、菲比、罗斯和乔伊。）

Joey

Ross, did you really read all these baby books?

罗斯，你真的把所有婴儿书都读了？

Ross

Yup! You could plunk me down in the middle of any woman's uterus, no compass, and I can find my way out of there like that! (snaps fingers)

恩！你可以把我塞到子宫里的任何地方，用不着指南针，我都能从里面爬出来，就像这样！（打响指）

Phoebe

Ooh, this is cool...it says in some parts of the world, people actually eat the placenta. (Joey grimaces)

噢，太棒了……书上说在有些地方，人们真的吃胎盘。（乔伊做鬼脸。）

Chandler

And, we're done with the yogurt. (Sets yogurt down on table)

呃..这酸奶算是吃不下去了。（把酸奶放在桌上。）

Phoebe

(softly) Sorry. (Camera pans back to Monica, still on phone)

（轻声）对不起。（镜头切回还在打电话的莫妮卡。）

Monica

Aunt Syl, I did this as a favor, I am not a caterer. What do you want me to do with a dozen lasagnas? (listens to Aunt Syl on phone, looks shocked) Nice talk, Aunt Syl. (in New York accent) You kiss Uncle Freddie with that mouth?

Syl婶婶，我是为了帮你，我可不是承包宴席的。你让我拿这一打面怎么办？说话真好听，Syl婶婶。你用这张嘴亲Freddie叔叔吗？

(Camera pans back to group in living room)

（镜头切回客厅里的几个人。）

Joey

Hey Ross, listen, you know that right now, your baby's only this big? (measures about 2 inches with his thumb and index finger) This is your baby. (in baby-like voice) Hi Daddy!

嘿，罗斯，你知道么，现在你的宝贝就这么大？（用拇指和食指量出大约两英寸）这是你孩子。嘿，爸爸！

Ross

(waves) Hello!

（挥手）嘿！

Joey

(in baby-like voice) How come you don't live with Mommy? (pause; shows Ross less than amused) How come Mommy lives with that other lady? (pause; Ross still looks less than amused; Joey smiling) What's a lesbian? (playfully hits Ross)

（娃娃音）为什么你不和妈咪一起住？为什么妈咪和另一个女人一起住？什么是女同性恋？（开玩笑地打罗斯。）

(Rachel enters with Paolo, speaking Italian. Ross looks annoyed)

（瑞秋和保罗进来，说着意大利语。罗斯看起来很恼火。）

Rachel

Honey, you can say it, Poconos, Poconos, it's like Poc-o-nos (touching Paolo's nose with forefinger with each syllable)

亲爱的，你能说的，泊科农斯，泊科农斯，就像 泊科-阿-农斯。（用食指随着每个音节点保罗的鼻子。）

Paolo

Ah, poke (Paolo touches Rachel's nose) a (touches nose again) nose, mmm (they rub noses, then kisses her)

啊，戳一下鼻子……嗯……（他们摩擦鼻子，然后他吻她。）

Joey, Chandler, and Ross: (sitting in living room, imitating Paolo) Mma, Mma, Mmaah.

（坐在客厅里模仿保罗）嗯，嗯，嗯啊。

(Camera pans to Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe in the kitchen)

（镜头切到厨房里的瑞秋、莫妮卡和菲比。）

Monica

So, did I hear Poconos?

那么，我听见泊科农斯了吗？

Rachel

Yes, my sister's giving us her place for the weekend.

是的，我妹妹让我们去她那渡周末。

Phoebe

Woo-hoo, first weekend away together!

第一次周末结伴出游！

Monica

Yeah, that's a big step.

是啊，进展了一大步。

Rachel

I know...

我知道……

(Camera pans to Ross, looking dejected)

（镜头切到罗斯，看起来很沮丧。）

Chandler

(to Ross) Ah, it's just a weekend, big deal!

（对罗斯）啊，就是个周末，没什么！

Ross

Wasn't this supposed to be just a fling, huh? Shouldn't it be...(makes flinging motions with hands) flung by now?

不是说只是玩玩，不当真的吗，嗯？这……该玩完了吧，现在？

(Camera pans back to Rachel)

（镜头切回瑞秋。）

Rachel

I mean, we are way past the fling thing, I mean, I am feeling things that I've only read about in Danielle Steele books, you know? I mean, when I'm with him, I'm totally, totally...

我想，我们已远远超出玩的范围了，我现在的感觉只有在Danielle Steele的书里才找得到。我是说，当我和他在一起的时候，我完全、完全地……

(Camera pans to Ross, holding his stomach)

（镜头切到罗斯，捂着肚子。）

Ross

...nauseous, I'm physically nauseous. What am I supposed to do, huh? Call immigration? (pauses, looks suddenly inspired) I could call immigration!

……恶心，我本能的恶心。我该怎么办？打电话给移民局？我可以打电话给移民局！

Joey

I love babies, with their little baby shoes, and their little baby toes, and their little baby hands...

我喜欢孩子，他们的小鞋，小脚指头，小手……

Chandler

Ok, you're going to have to stop that, forever!

好了，你别再这样了，永远不要！

(Joey opens door, throws keys on kitchen table, table falls over)

（乔伊开门，把钥匙扔到厨房桌子上，桌子倒了。）

Joey

Need a new table.

需要新桌子了。

Chandler

You think?

你这么想？

Carol

Hey hey, come on in!

嘿，进来吧！

(Ross enters, carrying lasagna)

（罗斯端着千层面进来。）

Ross

Hey, hello! mmwa! (kisses Carol) I brought all the books, and Monica sends her love, along with this lasagna.

嘿，嘿！我把书都拿回来了，莫妮卡送你这些面条。

Carol

Oh great! Is it vegetarian, 'cause Susan doesn't eat meat.

太好了！是素的吗，苏珊不吃肉。

Ross

(pauses) I'm pretty sure that it is...

（停顿）我肯定是素的……

Carol

So, I got the results of the amnio today.

我拿到超声波结果了。

Ross

(making flinging gestures with hands) Oh, tell me, tell me, is everything, uhh....?

（摆手势）哦，告诉我，告诉我，怎么样……？

Carol

Totally and completely healthy!

完全彻底的健康！

Ross

Oh, that's great, that is great! (Hugs and kisses Carol. Then picks up a picture frame)

哦，太棒了，太棒了！（拥抱并亲吻卡罗。然后拿起一个相框。）

Ross

Hey, when did you and Susan meet Huey Lewis?

嗨，你和苏珊什么时候认识的Huey Lewis？

Carol

Uh, that's our friend Tanya.

啊，那是我们的朋友Tanya。

Ross

(surprised, chuckling nervously) Of course it's your friend Tanya. (looks up frightenedly)

（惊讶，紧张地轻笑）原来是你们的朋友Tanya。（害怕地抬头看。）

Carol

Don't you want to know about the sex?

你不想知道性别吗？

Ross

(chuckles nervously) The sex? (chuckles) Um, I'm having enough trouble with the image of you and Susan together, when you throw in Tanya (miming washing hair, that's the best I could think of), yaw...

（紧张地笑）性？嗯，光想你和苏珊一起的样子我就够不舒服的，你要再把Tanya加进来，呃……

Carol

The sex of the baby, Ross.

我是说孩子的性别，罗斯。

Ross

Oh, you know the sex of the baby? Oh, oh-oh-oh!

噢，你知道了？噢……

Carol

Do you want to know?

你想知道吗？

Ross

No, no, no, no, no, I don't want to know, absolutely not. I think, you know, I think you should know until you look down there, and say, oop, there it is! (pauses) Or isn't...

不，不，我不想，绝对不想。我不想现在知道，我认为应该等到那时再低头瞧一瞧，然后说，嘿，带那个的……或不带的……

(Susan enters)

（苏珊进来。）

Susan

Oh, hello Ross!

你好，罗斯！

Ross

Susan...

苏珊……

Susan

So, so, did you hear?

那么……你结果怎样？

Ross

Yes, we did, everything's A-OK!

对，我们知道了，一切正常！

Susan

Oh, that's so... (Susan hugs Carol, they giggle, Ross steps away) It really is...do we know...?

噢，那真的是太好了……我们知道了“那个”了么？

Carol

Yes, we certainly do, it's going to be...

是的，当然知道了，它是个……

Ross

(flailing arms in protest) Oh, hey hey hey, ho ho ho, hello, guy who doesn't want to know, standing right here!

（挥臂抗议）嘿，嘿，嘿，这有人不想知道，我就站在这呢！

Susan

Oh, well, is it what we thought it would be?

嗯，那么，是我们希望的……么？

Carol

Mm-hmmm (Susan and Carol hug, giggling. Ross stands back, reaches out and lightly taps Susan's shoulder)

嗯。（苏珊和卡罗拥抱，咯咯笑。罗斯退后，伸手轻轻拍苏珊的肩膀。）

Ross

Ok, what, what...ok, what did we think it was going to be?

什么，什么……你们希望是男是女？

Carol and Susan

It's a...

是……

Ross

(interrupts) No, no, no I don't want to know, don't want to know. Ok, you know, I should probably, I should probably just go.

（打断）不，不，我不想知道，不想。好吧，我知道，我还是……先回去了。

Carol

Well, thanks for the books.

好的，谢谢你的书。

Ross

No problem, ok, mmmwa (kisses Carol) oh, mmmwa (kisses Carol's stomach, then punches Susan's shoulder) Susan...

没问题，嗯……（吻卡罗）哦，嗯……（吻卡罗的肚子，然后轻捶苏珊的肩膀）苏珊……

(Ross leaves.)

（罗斯离开。）

Susan

All right, who should we call first, your folks, or Deb and Rona?

好吧，我们该先告诉谁，你家人，还是Deb和Rona？

(intercom buzzer rings)

（对讲机响。）

Carol

Hello?

喂？

Ross

(on intercom) Uh, never mind, I don't want to know. (Carol and Susan laugh)

（对讲机）嗯，没事，我不想知道。（卡罗和苏珊笑。）

Chandler

Ok, so it's just because it was my table, I have to buy a new one?

那么就因为这是我的桌子，就得让我买新的？

Joey

That's the rule.

对，这是规矩。

Chandler

What rule? There's no rule, if anything, you owe me a table!

什么规矩？没有什么规矩，如果有的话，规矩就是你欠我个桌子！

Joey

How'd you get to that?

你从哪得的这个结论？

Chandler

Well, I believe the piece of furniture was fine until your little breakfast adventure with Angela Delvecchio.

这个桌子一直很结实直到你开始在早餐时蹂躏Angela Delvecchio。

Joey

You knew about that?

你知道这事？

Chandler

Well, let's just say the impressions you made in the butter left little to the imagination.

这么说吧，看到那罐黄油的惨相，根本连想象都省了。

Joey

Ok, ok, How about if we split it?

好吧，那我们合伙买怎么样？

Chandler

What do you mean, like, buy it together?

你什么意思，一起买？

Joey

Yeah.

是呀。

Chandler

You think we're ready for something like that?

你认为我们的关系进展到这个的程度了么？

Joey

Why not?

为什么不？

Chandler

Well, it's a pretty big commitment, I mean, what if one of us wants to move out?

这可是个很大的承诺，我意思是，要是有人想搬出去呢？

Joey

Why, are you moving out?

为什么，你要搬吗？

Chandler

I'm not moving out.

我不搬呐。

Joey

You'd tell me if you were moving out right?

你要是搬的话得告诉我好吗？

Chandler

Yeah, yeah, it's just that with my last roommate Kip...

好，好，只是我上个室友Kip……

Joey

Aw, I know all about Kip!

噢，我知道Kip所有的事！

Chandler

It's just that we bought a hibachi together, and then he ran off and got married, and things got pretty ugly.

我们一起买了个日式古桌，后来他要结婚走人，结果事情搞得很糟。

Joey

Well, let me ask you something, was Kip a better roommate than me?

好吧，我问你个问题，作为室友Kip比我好吗？

Chandler

Aw, don't do that.

噢，别这么问。

Phoebe's Assistant

We've got a couple changes in your schedule. Your 4:00 herbal massage has been pushed back to 4:30 and Miss Somerfield canceled her 5:30 shiatsu.

你的日程有些变化。你4:00的香蕈按摩推迟到4:30，还有Somerfield太太取消了5:30的日式指压。

Phoebe

Ok, thanks. (assistant leaves, then walks back in)

好，谢谢。（助理离开，又走回来。）

Phoebe's Assistant

Oh, here comes your 3:00. I don't mean to sound unprofessional, but, yum (walks out, Paolo enters)

哦，你3:00的顾客来了。我不想表现得不专业，但是，很迷人哦……（走出去，保罗进来。）

Paolo

Buon Giorno, Bella Phoebe!

你好，美丽的菲比！

Phoebe

Oh, Paolo, hi, what are you doing here?

哦，保罗，你好，有何贵干？

Paolo

Uh, Racquela tell me you massage, eh?

嗯，Racquela告诉我你按摩，是么？

Phoebe

Well, Racquela's right, yeah!

嗯，Racquela说得对。

(Paolo speaks Italian)

（保罗说意大利语。）

Phoebe

Oh, okay, I don't know what you just said, so let's get started.

噢……我不知道你刚才说什么，我们开始吧。

Paolo

Uh, I am, uh, being naked?

嗯，需要我裸体么？

Phoebe

Um, that's really your decision, I mean, some people prefer, you know, to take off...oh whoops! You're being naked!

嗯，这就是个人喜好了，我是说，有的人喜欢脱……噢！你光着身子！

Rachel

(to Ross) I can't believe you don't want to know. I mean, I couldn't not know, I mean, if, if the doctor knows, and Carol knows, and Susan knows....

（对罗斯）我不能相信你不想知道。我意思是，我可不能不知道，如果医生知道，卡罗尔知道，还有苏珊知道……

Monica

And Monica knows...

还有莫妮卡知道……

Ross

Wha, heh, how could you know, I don't even know!

你怎么知道的，我都不知道！

Monica

Carol called me to thank me for the lasagna, I asked, she told me.

卡罗尔因为面条打电话道谢，我问她，她就告诉我了。

Joey

So what's it gonna be? (Monica whispers in Joey's ear. Ross gets up and waves arms frantically in protest)

那么孩子是？（莫妮卡在乔伊耳边低语。罗斯站起来，疯狂挥臂抗议。）

Ross

Wait---oh---hey---huh, oh great now he knows, and I don't know!

等等——哦——嘿——啊，太好了，现在他都知道了，我却不知道！

Monica

I'm sorry, I'm just excited about being an aunt!

对不起，我当了姑姑我太兴奋了！

Joey

Or an uncle...

也可能是叔叔……

(Phoebe enters)

（菲比进来。）

Joey and Chandler

Hey Phoebe!

嘿，菲比！

Ross

Hi Pheebs!

嘿，菲比！

Rachel

Pheebs!

菲比！

Phoebe

Fine!

很好！

Monica

Phoebe, what's the matter?

菲比，怎么了？

Phoebe

Nothing, I'm sorry, I'm just, I'm out of sorts.

没什么，对不起，我就是，我不舒服。

Customer

Hey, can we get some cappuccino over here?

嘿，能给我们上些咖啡么？

Rachel

Oh, right, that's me!

哦，对，是叫我！

Joey

Hey, Chandler, that table place closes at 7, come on.

嘿，钱德，那个卖桌子的地方7点就关了，走吧。

Chandler

Fine. (Joey and Chandler walk towards the door)

好吧。（乔伊和钱德勒朝门口走去。）

Monica

Phoebe, what is it?

菲比，怎么了？

Phoebe

All right, you know Paolo?

好吧，你知道Paolo？

Ross

I'm familiar with his work, yes...

我了解他那点把戏的，是的……

Phoebe

Well, he made a move on me.

他调戏我。

(Joey and Chandler come back)

（乔伊和钱德勒回来。）

Joey

Whoa, store will be open tomorrow!

别急，商店明天还会开！

Chandler

More coffee over here, please!

请再来点咖啡！

Commercial Break

广告时间

Monica

Well, what happened?

怎么回事？

Phoebe

Well, he came in for a massage, and everything was fine until. (A flashback starts Paolo, lying on massage table, moving his hands up Phoebe's legs.)

保罗躺在按摩床上，手沿着菲比的腿往上移。）

Joey and Chandler

Ooooohh!

哦……！

Ross

My God.

我的天。

Monica

Are you sure?

你确定？

(The flashback resumes with Paolo grabbing her butt.)

保罗抓她的屁股。）

Phoebe

Oh yeah, I'm sure. (Flashback resumes with Phoebe doing a voiceover.) And all of a sudden his hands weren't the problem anymore. (Flashback continues: Paolo rolls over, Phoebe looks down, then quickly looks up, bites lip, shakes her head)

保罗翻过身，菲比往下看，然后迅速抬头，咬嘴唇，摇头。）

Monica

Was it...?

他那儿……？

Phoebe

Oh, boy scouts could have camped under there.

童子军都能在那扎营了。

Guys

Oooooo....

哦……！

(Rachel runs over)

（瑞秋跑过来。）

Rachel

"Ooo," what?

“哦”，什么？

Phoebe

Uma Thurman.

Uma Thurman。

Monica

Oh!

哦！

Ross

The actress!

那个女演员！

(all talking indistinctly, high-fiving)

（大家含糊地说话，击掌。）

Ross

Thanks Rach.

谢了，瑞秋。

(Rachel walks away)

（瑞秋走开。）

Chandler

So what are you gonna do?

那么你打算怎么办？

Ross

You have to tell her! You have to tell her! It's your moral obligation, as a friend, as a woman, I think it's a feminist issue! Guys? Guys? (waiting for guys to chime in)

你必须告诉她！你必须告诉她！这是道德上的义务，作为朋友，同是女人，我认为这涉及到女权问题！伙计们？（等着男生们附和。）

Chandler

Oh, yeah, you have to tell her.

哦，对，你必须告诉她。

Joey

Feminist issue. That's where I went!

女权问题。这是我的观点！

Phoebe

She is gonna hate me.

她会恨我的。

Ross

(sympathetic yet...) Yeah, well...

（同情地但……）是的，没错。

Joey

Will you pick one, just pick one! Here, how about that one? (points to a table)

你挑一个，挑一个！那个怎么样？（指着一张桌子。）

Chandler

That's patio furniture!

那是放在院子里用的！

Joey

So what, like people are gonna come in and think, "Uh-oh, I'm outside again?" Of course!

那有什么，难道人们进屋后会想“哦，我又出去了”？

Chandler

(gesturing towards another table) What about the birds?

（指向另一张桌子）那鸟桌怎么样？

Joey

I don't know, birds just don't say, "Hello, sit here, eat something."

不知道，鸟桌不会对你说“你好，坐这，吃点什么”。

Chandler

You pick one.

那你选吧。

Joey

All right, how about the ladybugs?

好吧，那瓢虫桌怎么样？

Chandler

Oh, so, forget about the birds, but big red insects suggest fine dining!

哦，且不说鸟，一只红色的昆虫就能够给人进食的感觉了？

Joey

Fine, you want to get the birds, get the birds!

好，你想要鸟，就要鸟吧！

Chandler

Not like that, I won't! (pauses) Kip would have liked the birds! (Joey turns and gives Chandler a dirty look)

不是这样，我不要！Kip会喜欢鸟桌的！（乔伊转身瞪了钱德勒一眼。）

Phoebe

Hey!

嘿！

Rachel

Hi Pheebs!

嘿，菲比！

Phoebe

Are you moving out?

你要搬出去吗？

Rachel

No, these aren't all my suitcases. (picks up small blue suitcase and shows to Phoebe) This one's Paolo's.

不，这不全是我的行李。这个是Paolo的。

Phoebe

Um, um, Rachel can we talk for a sec?

嗯，瑞秋，我们能谈一会吗？

Rachel

Well, sure...just a sec, though, 'cause Paolo's on his way over.

当然可以……就一会，因为Paolo正过来呢。

Phoebe

Oh! (sits down) Ok, um, ok, um...

哦！（坐下）好吧，嗯……

Rachel

Oh, Pheebs, Pheebs...

哦，菲比……

Phoebe

Ok, um, (clears throat) we haven't known each other for that long a time, and, um, there are three things that you should know about me. One, my friends are the most important thing in my life, two, I never lie, and three, I make the best oatmeal raisin cookies in the world. (Phoebe opens a tin and offers Rachel a cookie)

好吧，嗯，（清嗓子）我们认识还不长，嗯，我有三件事你应该知道。一，朋友是我生命中最重要的；二，我从不说谎；三，我做的提子燕麦饼干是最好的。（菲比打开一个罐子，递给瑞秋一块饼干。）

Rachel

(taking cookie) Ok, thanks Pheebs (takes bite of cookie, overwhelmed) Oh my God, why have I never tasted these before?!

（接过饼干）好吧，谢谢。哦，太好吃了，为什么我从来没吃过这些？

Phoebe

Oh, I don't make them a lot because I don't think it's fair to the other cookies.

哦，我不怎么做，因为我认为这对别的饼干来说不太公平。

Rachel

All right, well, you're right, these are the best oatmeal cookies I've ever had.

好吧，你是对的，这是我吃过的最好提子燕麦饼干。

Phoebe

Which proves that I never lie.

这也证明了我不说谎。

Rachel

I guess you don't.

我想是的。

Phoebe

Paolo made a pass at me.

Paolo调戏我了。

(Rachel looks stunned)

（瑞秋惊呆了。）

Chandler

So, what do you think?

那么，你们看怎么样？

Ross

I think It's the most beautiful table I've ever seen.

我想这是我见过的最漂亮的桌子。

Chandler

I know!

我知道！

(The camera pans back to reveal Joey and Chandler's new foosball table.)

（镜头拉远，露出乔伊和钱德勒的新桌上足球台。）

Monica

So how does this work, you going to balance the plates on these little guys' heads?

那么它怎么用呢，你得把盘子平衡在这些小人头上吗？

Joey

Who cares, we'll eat at the sink! Come on, let's play!

管他呢，我们在水槽边吃饭！来吧，我们开玩！

Monica

Heads up Ross! (Monica scores on Chandler and Joey) Score! (points at Chandler) You suck!

闪开你的小人罗斯！得分！你们真臭！

(Chandler looks at Joey in amazement)

（钱德勒惊讶地看着乔伊。）

Phoebe

Are you okay?

你没事吧？

Rachel

I need some milk.

我需要牛奶。

Phoebe

Ok, I've got milk (takes thermos from her bag and starts to pour a cup) Here you go... (Rachel drinks straight from thermos) Oh!(Rachel finishes thermos) Better?

好的，我准备了牛奶。（从包里拿出保温瓶倒了一杯）给你……（瑞秋直接对瓶喝。）更好点了么？

Rachel

No...oh, I feel so stupid! Oh, I think about the other day with you guys and I was all "Oh, Paolo, he's so great, he makes me feel so..." Oh, God, I'm so embarrassed!

没有……哦，我真太蠢了！哦，我回想起来那天……哦，Paolo，他真好，他让我觉得真……天哪，我真为自己难为情！

Phoebe

I'm so embarrassed, I'm the one he hit on!

我才难为情，我是他调戏的那个！

(Phoebe's and Rachel's lines overlap)

（菲比和瑞秋的话重叠。）

Rachel

Pheebs, if I had never met him this never would have happened!

菲比，如果我没遇见他，事情就不会发生！

Rachel and Phoebe

I'm so sorry! No I'm sorry! No I'm sorry! No I'm sorry!

真对不起！不我对不起你！不，等等……我们为什么要互相道歉？

Phoebe

No, wait, oh, what are we sorry about?

不知道……对，他才是猪！

Rachel

I don't know...right, he's the pig!

真是猪！

Phoebe

Such a pig!

哦，我的天，他真是头猪。

Rachel

Oh, God, he's such a pig,

对，他就像个……

Phoebe

Oh he's like a...

他像个猪，一个恶心的……猪……猪人！

Rachel

He's like a big disgusting...

对，骂得好！

Phoebe

...like a...

噢，但他是我的猪人……

Rachel

...pig...pig man!

为什么我看不出来？

Phoebe

Yes, good! Ok...

我知道！是因为……他太帅了，他太迷人，当他看你的时候……

Rachel

(voice wavers) Oh, but he was my pig man...how did I not see this?

别说了，菲比。

Phoebe

(raises hand) Oh! I know! (Rachel startled) It's because... he's gorgeous, and he's charming, and when he looks at you...

不说了。

Rachel

Ok, Ok, Pheebs...

噢，天哪……

Phoebe

The end.

我应该瞒着你吗？

Rachel

Oh, God...

不，不，相信我，让我知道是对的。

Phoebe

Should I not have told you?

呃，我只是把事情想的太好了……

Rachel

No, no, trust, me, it's, it's, it's much better that I know. Uh, I just liked it better before it was better...

我想她的情绪还算好。

(Phoebe scoots her chair over to Rachel and hugs her)

（菲比把椅子挪到瑞秋旁边，拥抱她。）

Phoebe

I think she took it pretty well. You know Paolo's over there right now, so...

我想她的情绪还算好。Paolo现在就在那边，所以……

Monica

We should get over there and see if she's okay. (switching places with Ross) Just one...second! Score! (Monica scores, high-fives with Ross) Game! Come on. (Monica and Phoebe leave)

我们应该过去，看看她有没有事。（和罗斯换位）一会……就好！得分！赢了！走吧。（莫妮卡和菲比离开。）

Ross

(wiping his brow) Ah...ooh! Well, looks like, uh, we kicked your butts.

（擦额头）啊！嗯，看起来，呃，我们打得你们屁滚尿流。

Joey

No-no, she kicked our butts. You could be on the Olympic standing-there team.

不，不，她打得我们屁滚尿流。你可以参加奥林匹克的“站一边看”之队。

Ross

Come on, two on one.

得了吧，二对一。

Chandler

What are you still doing here? She just broke up with the guy, it's time for you to swoop in!

你还在这干什么？她刚和那男的分手，该你趁虚而入啦！

Ross

What, now?

什么，现在？

Joey

Yes, now is when you swoop! You gotta make sure that when Paolo walks out of there, the first guy Rachel sees is you, She's gotta know that you're everything he's not! You're like, like the anti-Paolo!

是的，现在正是时候！你得确保Paolo走出屋子后，你是瑞秋见到的第一个男人，得让她知道你是那么好，而他一无是处！你就像，像反-Paolo！

Chandler

My Catholic friend is right. She's distraught. You're there for her. You pick up the pieces, and then you usher in the age of Ross! (Ross and Chandler look off into the distance. Joey, wondering what they are looking at, looks in the same direction)

罗斯时代！（罗斯和钱德勒望向远方。乔伊好奇他们在看什么，也往同一方向看。）

Paolo

No, that's cold, that's cold, that's...

你怎么能……

Ross

(entering) How's it going?

（进来）怎么样了？

Monica

Don't stare. Now she just finished throwing his clothes off the balcony, now there's just a lot of gesturing and arm-waving, (shows Rachel gesturing with hands in front of her chest), Ok, that is either, "How could you?" or, "Enormous breasts!" Here he comes!

别盯着看。现在她刚把他的衣服从阳台上扔下去，现在是他们比比画画的，嗯，这个动作可能表示“你怎么能？”也可能表示“好大的胸脯！”他过来了！

Phoebe

Ooh!

哦！

(Paolo enters. Ross, Phoebe, and Monica scatter)

（保罗进来。罗斯、菲比和莫妮卡散开。）

Paolo

Uh, I am, uh, to say good-bye.

嗯，我……过来……说声再见。

Phoebe

Oh, ok bye-bye.

噢，行了，走吧。

Monica

Paolo, I really hate you for what you did to Rachel, (hands him a lasagna) but I still have five of these, so heat it at 375 until the cheese bubbles.

Paolo，我非常憎恨你对瑞秋做的事，但我还有五个没处理掉，在烤箱里烤到奶酪冒泡就行了。

Paolo

Grazie.

谢谢。

Ross

Paolo, I-I just want to tell you and I think I speak for everyone when I say... (shuts door in his face and walks away)

Paolo，我只想告诉你我要代大家说……（当着他的面关上门，走开。）

Phoebe

Oh, just look at her... (girls move toward Rachel on the balcony)

噢，看她多伤心……（女孩们向阳台上的瑞秋走去。）

Ross

Oh you guys, I-I really think just one of us should go out there so she's not overwhelmed...

伙计们，我认为最好我们中的一个过去，这样她就不会被压垮……

Monica

Oh, you're right.

你说的对。

Ross

(pulls Monica back) ...and I really think it should be me.

（把莫妮卡拉回来）……而且那个人应该是我。

Ross

Hey.

嘿。

Rachel

Hey.

嘿。

Ross

You all right?

你没事吧？

Rachel

Ooh, I've been better...

噢，我好点了……

Ross

Come here. (he hugs Rachel) Listen, you deserve so much better than him...you know, I mean, you, you, you should be with a guy who knows what he has when he has you.

过来。（他拥抱瑞秋。）听着，他远远配不上你……我是说你应该找一个能明白拥有你是多么幸福的人。

Rachel

Oh, Ross...

哦，罗斯……

Ross

What?

什么？

Rachel

I am so sick of guys. I don't want to look at another guy, I don't want to think about another guy, I don't even want to be near another guy. (Ross crosses arms)

我讨厌死男人了。我都不想看见男的，我也不想考虑别的男人，我甚至不想听男人说话。（罗斯抱起手臂。）

Ross

Huh.

哈……

Rachel

Oh Ross, you're so great!

哦，罗斯，你真好。

Ross

Ohhhh (Hugs her and sighs)

哦……（拥抱她，叹气。）

Monica

Ooh...hey honey, are you all right?

嘿，亲爱的，你还好吧？

Rachel

Oh...

哦……

Phoebe

You ok?

你没事？

Rachel

...medium...hmm...any cookies left?

……一般吧……嗯……还有饼干吗？

Phoebe

Yep!

有！

Ross

See, Rach, uh, see, I don't think that swearing off guys altogether is the answer. I really don't. I think that what you need is to develop a more sophisticated screening process.

瑞秋，我认为你不应该把所有男人拒之门外。我不这么想。我认为你只不过需要建立一个成熟的筛选程序。

Rachel

No. I just need to be by myself for a while, you know? I just got to figure out what I want.

不。我只想先单身一阵，你知道吗？我得先弄明白我想要什么样的。

Ross

Uh, no, no, see, because not...not all guys are going to be a Paolo.

不，不，你看，因为不是所有人都会像Paolo那样。

Rachel

No, I know, I know, and I'm sure your little boy is not going to grow up to be one.

不，我知道，我知道，而且我肯定你的小儿子不会长成他那样。

Ross

(astonished) What?

（惊讶）什么？

Rachel

What?

什么？

Ross

I-I'm, I'm having a boy?

我……我……我有了个儿子？

Rachel

Uh...no. No, no, in fact, you're not having a boy.

不，不，不，事实上，不是儿子。

Ross

Wha-I'm having, I'm having a boy! (babbling) Huh, am I having a boy?

我有了，我有了儿子！嗯？我是有了儿子吗？

Girls

Yes, you're having a boy! (Monica runs over and hugs Ross)

是，你有儿子了！（莫妮卡跑过来拥抱罗斯。）

Ross

I'm having a boy! Oh, I'm having a boy!

我有儿子了！哦，我有儿子了！

(Joey and Chandler run in)

（乔伊和钱德勒跑进来。）

Chandler

Wha-

什——

Joey

Wha-

什——

Joey and Chandler

What is it?

怎么了？

Ross

I'm having a boy! I-I'm having a boy!

我有儿子了！我有儿子了！

Joey

Hey!

嘿！

Chandler

Hey!

嘿！

Joey and Chandler

We already knew that! (they hug)

我们已经知道了！（他们拥抱。）

Ross

I'm having a son. Um...

我有儿子了。嗯……

(Ross looks scared)

（罗斯看起来很害怕。）

Closing Credits

片尾

Monica

Yes! And that would be a shut-down!

看！我又赢了一局！

Joey and Chandler

Shut-out!! (They both start heading for their rooms.)

闭嘴吧！！（两人开始回自己的房间。）

Monica

Where are you guys going? Come on, one more game!

你们去哪？来呀，再来一局！

Joey

Uh, it's 2:30 in the morning!

嘿，现在已经凌晨2:30了！

Chandler

Yeah, get out!

对，出去！

Monica

You guys are always hanging out in my apartment! Come on, I'll only use my left hand, huh? Come on, wussies! (Joey and Chandler pick her up) All right, ok, I gotta go. I'm going, (they throw her out) and I'm gone.

你们可老是到我那屋去泡着！来吧，我就用左手？来吧，软蛋！（乔伊和钱德勒把她抬起来。）好吧，我得走了。我走了，我已经走了。（他们把她扔出去。）

Chandler

(to Joey) One more game?

（对乔伊）再来一局？

Joey

Oh yeah!

当然！

End

剧终