The One With the Sonogram at the End

Monica

What you guys don't understand is, for us, kissing is as important as any part of it.

你们男生不懂亲吻对女生的重要性。

Joey

Yeah, right!... Y'serious?

没错，当真？

Phoebe

Oh, yeah!

当真。

Rachel

Everything you need to know is in that first kiss.

你想了解的一切全在初吻之中。

Monica

Absolutely.

没错。

Chandler

Yeah, I think for us, kissing is pretty much like an opening act, y'know? I mean it's like the stand-up comedian you have to sit through before Pink Floyd comes out.

对我们而言亲吻就像是开场，就像佛洛伊飞船出场前，你得耐着性子先看完脱口秀。

Ross

Yeah, and it's not that we don't like the comedian, it's that... that's not why we bought the ticket.

对，我们并非讨厌脱口秀，但那不是我们买票的原因。

Chandler

The problem is, though, after the concert's over, no matter how great the show was, you girls are always looking for the comedian again, y'know? I mean, we're in the car, we're fighting traffic... basically just trying to stay awake.

问题出在于演唱会结束后，不论表演有多精采，你们女生总还想再看脱口秀，我们在车上奋力杀出车阵，只是拼命让自己别睡着。

Rachel

Yeah, well, word of advice: Bring back the comedian. Otherwise next time you're gonna find yourself sitting at home, listening to that album alone.

给你一个建议。叫脱口秀主持人再度上场，否则下次，你们只能坐家里听唱片。

Joey

(pause)....Are we still talking about sex?

我们还在谈论性吗？

Opening Credits

片头

Ross

No, it's good, it is good, it's just that- mm- doesn't she seem a little angry?

不，这样很好，只是她看起来是不是有点生气？

Marsha

Well, she has issues.

她有麻烦事。

Ross

Does she？

她有吗？

Marsha

He's out banging other women over the head with a club, while she sits at home trying to get the mastodon smell out of the carpet!

他在外头乱搞女人，而她却待家里，设法去除地毯上乳齿象的味道。

Ross

Marsha, these are cave people. Okay? They have issues like 'Gee, that glacier's getting kinda close.' See?

玛莎，他们是穴居人，他们关心的问题是冰河愈来愈接近了，懂吗？

Marsha

Speaking of issues, isn't that your ex-wife?

谈到问题，那不是你前妻吗？

(Carol, Ross's ex-wife, has entered behind them and is standing outside the exhibit.)

（卡罗，罗斯的前妻，从他们身后走进来，站在展览外面。）

Ross

(trying to ignore her) No. No.

我的？不是。

Marsha

Yes, it is. Carol! Hi!

是的，她是。嘿，你好。

Ross

Okay, okay, yes, it is. (waves) How about I'll, uh, catch up with you in the Ice Age.

是的，我到冰河期找你。

(Marsha exits and Ross waves Carol into the exhibit.)

（玛莎离开，罗斯招手让卡罗进来。）

Ross

Hi.

嗨。

Carol

So.

那么。

Ross

You look great. I, uh... I hate that.

你的气色好极了，我讨厌看到这样。

Carol

Sorry. You look good too.

抱歉，谢了。你的气色也很好。

Ross

Ah, well, in here, anyone who... stands erect... So what's new? Still, uh...

在这儿任何直立的人...，最近如何？还是...

Carol

A lesbian?

女同志？

Ross

Well... you never know. How's, um.. how's the family?

问问无妨嘛，家庭生活如何？

Carol

Marty's still totally paranoid. Oh, and, uh-

玛蒂的疑心病还是很重。哦，还有——

Ross

Why- why are you here, Carol?

卡罗，为何来这儿？

Carol

I'm pregnant.

我怀孕了。

Ross

Pregnant?!

怀孕？！

Chandler

Oh, I think this is the episode of Three's Company where there's some kind of misunderstanding.

这一集嘛，就是那种总会有点误会的剧情。

Phoebe

...Then I've already seen this one! (Turns off the TV.)

那我看过了。（关掉电视。）

Monica

(taking a drink from Joey) Are you through with that?

（从乔伊手里拿过饮料）喝完没？

Joey

Yeah, sorry, the swallowing slowed me down.

抱歉，吞下去的时间太慢。

Monica

Whose little ball of paper is this?!

这是谁的小纸团？

Chandler

Oh, uh, that would be mine. See, I wrote a note to myself, and then I realised I didn't need it, so I balled it up and... (sees that Monica is glaring at him) ...now I wish I was dead.

我的，我写给自己一张便条，后来觉得自己不需要，于是将它揉成纸团，我不想活了。

(Monica starts to fluff a pillow.)

（莫妮卡开始拍打枕头。）

Phoebe

She's already fluffed that pillow... Monica, you know, you've already fluffed that- (Monica glares at her.) -but, it's fine!

她已经拍松过那个枕头，莫妮卡，你已经拍过了？——不过没关系！

Monica

Look, I'm sorry, guys, I just don't wanna give them any more ammunition than they already have.

抱歉，各位，我只是不想让他们有藉题发挥的机会。

Chandler

Yes, and we all know how cruel a parent can be about the flatness of a child's pillow.

没错，我们都知道父母对孩子的枕头要求有多苛刻。

Phoebe

Monica- Hi! Um, Monica, you're scaring me. I mean, you're like, you're all chaotic and twirly. And not in a good way.

莫妮卡，你吓到我了，你慌慌张张的，而且显得不是很好。

Joey

Yeah, calm down. You don't see Ross getting all chaotic and twirly every time they come.

冷静，你没见过每次他们来时，罗斯有慌张的样子。

Monica

That's because as far as my parents are concerned, Ross can do no wrong. Y'see, he's the Prince. Apparently they had some big ceremony before I was born.

因为在我爸妈心目中，罗斯不可能犯错，他是个王子，显然，他们在我出生前有个大型仪式。

Chandler

(looking out the window) Ew, ew, ew, ew ew ew ew ew!

（看着窗外）呃，呃，呃……

Monica

What?

什么？

Chandler

Ugly Naked Guy got a Thighmaster!

丑陋裸男有个“美腿器”！

All

Eeaagh!

呃！

(Rachel enters from her room.)

（瑞秋从房间出来。）

Rachel

Has anybody seen my engagement ring?

有人看见我的订婚戒指吗？

Phoebe

Yeah, it's beautiful.

有，很漂亮。

Rachel

Oh God, oh God, oh God oh God oh God oh God.... (Starts to look under the couch cushions.)

糟了。（开始找沙发垫子下面。）

Phoebe

No, look, don't touch that!

嘿，不要动它们！

Rachel

Oh, like I wasn't dreading tomorrow enough, having to give it back to him... 'Hi Barry! Remember me? I'm the girl in the veil who stomped on your heart in front of your entire family!' Oh God and now I'm gonna have to return the ring, without the ring, which makes it so much harder...

明天就要还他戒指，我似乎还不够担心。巴瑞，记得我吗？我是那个穿白纱，让你在亲友面前出糗的人，天啊，如今我必须还他戒指，戒指不见了，叫我如何面对他？

Monica

Easy Rach, we'll find it. (To all) Won't we!

别急，我们会找到的，对不？

Chandler and Joey

Oh! Yeah!

钱德勒 & 乔伊：是呀，我们会的。

Joey

Alright, when'd'ya have it on last?

最后一次戴是在什么时候？

Phoebe

Doy! Probably right before she lost it!

“孩仔”，大概是在遗失之前。

Chandler

You don't get a lot of 'doy' these days...

这年头说“孩仔”的人不多。

Rachel

I know I had it this morning, and I know I had it when I was in the kitchen with...

我今天早上还戴它，我在厨房戴着做...

Chandler

...Dinah?

面条？

Rachel

(looks at the lasagne and realizes something) Ohhhhh, don't be mad...

（看着千层面，意识到什么）别生气……

Monica

You didn't.

不会吧。

Rachel

Oh, I am sorry...

对不起……

Monica

I gave you one job! (Starts to examine the lasagne through the bottom of the glass pan.)

我就让你做了这么一件事情！（从玻璃盘底部检查千层面。）

Rachel

Oh, but look how straight those noodles are!

你看面条现在变得多直！

Chandler

Now, Monica, you know that's not how you look for an engagement ring in a lasagne...

莫妮卡，在千层面中找订婚戒指不是那样找。

Monica

(puts down the lasagne) I just... can't do it.

我办不到。

Chandler

Boys? We're going in.

我们很高兴做。

(Chandler, Joey, and Phoebe start to pick through the lasagne as there's a knock on the door which Monica answers.)

（钱德勒、乔伊、菲比开始翻千层面，这时有人敲门，莫妮卡去开门。）

Ross

(standing outside the door).....Hi.

（站在门外）嗨。

Monica

Wow. That is not a happy hi.

听起来并不开心。

Ross

Carol's pregnant.

卡萝怀孕了。

Phoebe

(while everyone else is stunned) Ooh! I found it!

（其他人震惊时）我找到了！

Monica

W-w-wh-... wha-... w-w-w-...

什，什，什么？

Ross

Yeah. Do that for another two hours, you might be where I am right about now. (He enters.)

你再持续两小时，就会变成我这样。（他进来。）

Chandler

Kinda puts that whole pillow thing in perspective, huh, Mon?

如此一来，枕头的事就可先拦在一旁？

Rachel

Well now, how-how do you fit into this whole thing?

你现在要怎么办？

Ross

Well, Carol says she and Susan want me to be involved, but if I'm not comfortable with it, I don't have to be involved basically it's entirely up to me.

卡萝说她和苏珊想让我加入，但是如果我对这件事不太感到舒服，我不想卷进去，一切由我做决定。

Phoebe

She is so great! I miss her.

她人好好，我真想念她。

Monica

What does she mean by 'involved'?

她所谓的“加入”代表什么？

Chandler

I mean presumably, the biggest part of your job is done.

我猜，你大部分的工作已经结束了。

Ross

Anyway, they want me to go down to this- sonogram thing with them tomorrow.

总之，她们要我和她们去做超音波检查。

Rachel

So what are you gonna do?

你打算怎么做？

Ross

I have no idea. No matter what I do, though, I'm still gonna be a father.

我也不知道，不管我怎么做我还是孩子的爹。

(Joey starts to eat the rest of the lasagne and everyone turns and stares at him.)

（乔伊开始吃剩下的千层面，大家都转头盯着他。）

Joey

.....Well, this is still ruined, right?

这面已经被搅乱了，不是吗？

Mrs. Geller

Oh, Martha Ludwin's daughter is gonna call you. (Tastes a snack) Mmm! What's that curry taste?

玛莎·路金的女儿会打电话给你。（尝了一口点心）怎么会有咖喱味？

Monica

Curry.

因为有放咖哩。

Mrs. Geller

Mmmm!

嗯！

Ross

I- I think they're great! I, I really do.

这东西很好吃，真的。

Mr. Geller

(To Ross) Do you remember the Ludwins? The big one had a thing for you, didn't she?

（对罗斯）你还记得路金一家人吗？他们家的大家伙喜欢你对不？

Mrs. Geller

They all had a thing for him.

他们家的女儿都喜欢他。

Ross

Aw, Mom...

不要这样，妈妈。

Monica

I'm sorry, why is this girl going to call me?

抱歉，她为何要打电话给我？

Mrs. Geller

Oh, she just graduated, and she wants to be something in cooking, or food, or.... I don't know. Anyway, I told her you had a restaurant-

她刚毕业，想找份烹饪的工作吧，我告诉她你开了一家餐馆。

Monica

No Mom, I don't have a restaurant, I work in a restaurant.

不，妈，我没开餐馆，我在餐厅工作。

Mrs. Geller

Well, they don't have to know that... (She starts to fluff the same pillow Monica fluffed multiple times earlier.)

他们不需要知道。（她开始拍打之前莫妮卡拍过多次的枕头。）

Monica

Ross, could you come and help me with the spaghetti, please?

罗斯，能帮我做义大利面吗？

Ross

Yeah. (They go to the kitchen.)

好。（他们去厨房。）

Mrs. Geller

Oh, we're having spaghetti! That's.... easy.

我们吃义大利面呀？太简单了。

Monica

I know this is going to sound unbelievably selfish, but, were you planning on bringing up the whole baby/lesbian thing? Because I think it might take some of the heat off me.

我知道这样要求过于自私，你能不能和他们说一下小孩/女同性恋之类的事？因为这样可以让我喘口气。

Mrs. Geller

What that Rachel did to her life.... We ran into her parents at the club, they were not playing very well.

瑞秋到底怎么了？我们在俱乐部遇见她父母，他们很不开心。

Mr. Geller

I'm not gonna tell you what they spent on that wedding... but forty thousand dollars is a lot of money!

我不想讲他们为此婚礼花了些什么，但是4万块不是个小数目？

Mrs. Geller

Well, at least she had the chance to leave a man at the altar...

至少她有机会把一个男人留在教堂里的圣坛。

Monica

What's that supposed to mean?

什么意思？

Mrs. Geller

Nothing! It's an expression.

没什么，随便说说。

Monica

No it's not.

不，不是的。

Mr. Geller

Don't listen to your mother. You're independent, and you always have been! Even when you were a kid... and you were chubby, and you had no friends, you were just fine! And you would read alone in your room, and your puzzles...

别听你妈乱讲话，你一直都很独立，就连你小时候，胖嘟嘟的一个朋友也没有，你还是活得好好的，你会待在你房里看书玩拼图。

Mr. Geller

Look, there are people like Ross who need to shoot for the stars, with his museum, and his papers getting published. Other people are satisfied with staying where they are- I'm telling you, these are the people who never get cancer.

而像罗斯这种人则追求卓越，博物馆，发表论文……其他人则安于现状，告诉你，这种人不会得癌症。

Mr. Geller

...And I read about these women trying to have it all, and I thank God 'Our Little Harmonica' doesn't seem to have that problem.

我还知道这些女人想拥有一切，幸好我们家的小摩妮卡似乎没有这种问题。

Monica

(trying desperately to change the subject) So, Ross, what's going on with you? Any stories? (Digs her elbow into his hand.) No news, no little anecdotes to share with the folks?

（拼命想转移话题）罗斯，你呢？最近有什么新闻八卦之类可以和老爸老妈分享的？

Ross

(pulls his hand away) Okay! Okay. (To his parents) Look, I, uh- I realise you guys have been wondering what exactly happened between Carol and me, and, so, well, here's the deal. Carol's a lesbian. She's living with a woman named Susan. She's pregnant with my child, and she and Susan are going to raise the baby.

（抽回手）好吧，我知道你们想了解我和卡萝之间倒底怎么了，事情是这样的，卡萝是个女同志，她和一个叫苏珊的女人同居，她怀了我的孩子，并打算和苏珊共同抚养他。

(Stunned silence ensues.)

（一片震惊的沉默。）

Mrs. Geller

(To Monica) And you knew about this?!

（对莫妮卡）这些你全都知道？

Commercial Break

广告时间

Joey

Your folks are really that bad, huh?

你的状况真的很糟糕吗？

Ross

Well, y'know, these people are pros. They know what they're doing, they take their time, they get the job done.

你要知道这些人十分专业，他们会躲在那里，再来个突然袭击。

Monica

Boy, I know they say you can't change your parents,... boy, if you could- (To Ross) -I'd want yours.

父母是无法交换的，如果可以，我要你的父母。

Ross

Must pee. (Goes to pee.)

我要去尿尿了。（去厕所。）

Phoebe

Y'know, it's even worse when you're twins.

如果你是双胞胎，情况会更惨。

Rachel

You're twins?

你是双胞胎？

Phoebe

Yeah. We don't speak. She's like this high-powered, driven career type.

对，我们不往来。她是一心追求事业的人。

Chandler

What does she do?

她从事什么工作？

Phoebe

She's a waitress.

服务生。

Rachel

All right, you guys, I kinda gotta clean up now. (They all start to leave.)

各位，我得打扫了。（大家开始离开。）

Monica

Chandler, you're an only child, right? You don't have any of this.

钱德，你是独子？你没有这些困扰？

Chandler

Well, no, although I did have an imaginary friend, who... my parents actually preferred.

没有。尽管我有个想像中的朋友，而我爸妈比较喜欢他。

Rachel

The lights, please..

帮我关灯。

(Joey turns off the lights, and they all leave as Rachel starts to clean up. Ross enters from the bathroom.)

（乔伊关灯，大家离开，瑞秋开始打扫。罗斯从浴室出来。）

Ross

...How long was I in there?

我在里面多久了？

Rachel

I'm just cleaning up.

只是我要打扫了。

Ross

D'ya.. uh.. Do you need any help?

需要帮忙吗？

Rachel

Uh.. okay, sure! Thanks! (She hands him the broom and sits down.)

好呀，谢了。（她把扫帚递给他，坐下。）

Ross

Anyway.. um.. (Starts to sweep.) So, you- uh- you nervous about Barry tomorrow?

（开始扫地）明天要见巴瑞，紧张吗？

Rachel

Oh.. a little..

有一点。

Ross

Mm-hmm..

嗯。

Rachel

A lot.

很紧张。

Ross

Mm.

嗯。

Rachel

So, got any advice? Y'know, as someone who's recently been- dumped?

有任何建言吗？就一个最近刚被甩的人而言。

Ross

Well, you may wanna steer clear of the word 'dumped'. Chances are he's gonna be this, this broken shell of a man, y'know, so you should try not to look too terrific, I know it'll be hard. Or, y'know, uh, hey!, I'll go down there, and I'll give Barry back his ring, and you can go with Carol and Susan to the OB/GYN...

你应该避免用“甩”这个字眼，现在他可能痛不欲生，因此你不该显得艳光照人，我知道这一点很难做到。这样吧，我拿戒指还巴瑞，你陪卡萝及苏珊去做检查。

Rachel

Oh, you've got Carol tomorrow.. When did it get so complicated?

你明天得见卡萝，此事何时变得这么复杂？

Ross

Got me.

你可问倒我了。

Rachel

Remember when we were in high school together?

还记得我们在高中时代吗？

Ross

Yeah.

记得。

Rachel

I mean, didn't you think you were just gonna meet someone, fall in love- and that'd be it? (Ross gazes at her.) ..Ross?

你没想过自己会遇见心上人，谈恋爱，然后厮守终生吗？罗斯？

Ross

Yes, yes!

什么事？

Rachel

Oh! Man, I never thought I'd be here.. (She leans back onto his hand.)

没想到自己会沦落到这个地步。（她靠到他的手上。）

Ross

Me either... (He pulls up a stool so that he doesn't have to move his hand.)

我也是。（他拉过一个凳子，这样就不用挪手了。）

Ross

(entering) Sorry I'm late, I was stuck at work. There was this big dinosaur.. thing.. anyway.

（进来）抱歉，我迟到了，我忙得无法脱身恐龙之类的事。

(Susan enters holding a drink.)

（苏珊拿着饮料进来。）

Susan

Hi.

嗨。

Carol

Ross, you remember Susan.

罗斯，记得苏珊吗？

Ross

How could I forget?

我怎能忘得了？

Susan

Ross.

罗斯。

Ross

(they shake hands) Hello, Susan. (To Carol) Good shake. Good shake. So, uh, we're just waiting for...?

（握手）苏珊，你好。（对卡罗）她的手好有力，那么我们在等……？

Carol

Dr. Oberman.

欧伯曼大夫。

Ross

..Dr. Oberman. Okay. And is he-

欧伯曼大夫，他……

Susan

She.

她。

Ross

-she, of course, she- uh- familiar with our.. special situation?

她，当然，她了解我们的特殊状况？

Carol

Yes, and she's very supportive.

了解，而且她非常支持。

Ross

Okay, that's great. (Susan gives her drink to Carol.) No, I'm- Oh.

这太好了。（苏珊把饮料递给卡罗）不，我只是。

Carol

Thanks.

谢了。

Ross

(picks up a surgical instrument and mimes a duck with it) Quack, quack..

（拿起一个手术器械，学鸭子叫）呱，呱……

Carol

Ross? That opens my cervix. (He drops it in horror.)

罗斯，那是用来打开我的子宫颈的。（他惊恐地扔掉。）

Rachel

Barry?

巴瑞。

Barry

Come in.

进来。

Rachel

(hesitates) Are you sure?

（犹豫）没问题？

Barry

Yeah! It's fine, it's fine. Robbie's gonna be here for hours.

没问题，罗比得待在这儿好几个小时。

Robbie

Huh?!

啊？

Barry

So, how ya doin?

最近好吗？

Rachel

I'm- uh- I'm okay... You look great!

你的气色好极了。

Barry

Yeah, well..

嗯。

Bernice

(over intercom) Dr. Farber, Jason Greenstein's gagging.

（对讲机）法大夫，杰森快没气了。

Barry

(answering the intercom) Be right there. (To Robbie and Rachel) Be back in a sec.

（接对讲机）马上到。（对罗比和瑞秋）我马上回来。

(As Barry exits Robbie stares at Rachel.)

（巴瑞离开，罗比盯着瑞秋。）

Rachel

I dumped him.

我甩了他。

Robbie

Okay.

哦。

Ross

So, um- so how's this, uh, how's this gonna work? Y'know, with us? Y'know, when, like, important decisions have to be made?

我们该如何处理此事？比方说某些重大的决定。

Carol

Give me a 'for instance'.

比如？

Ross

Well, uh, uh, I don't know, okay, okay, how about with the, uh, with the baby's name?

比方说孩子的名字。

Carol

Marlon-

马龙——

Ross

Marlon?!

马龙？

Carol

-if it's a boy, Minnie if it's a girl.

如果是个男孩马龙，如果是个女孩就叫米妮。

Ross

...As in Mouse?

和米奇的女友同名？

Carol

As in my grandmother.

和我奶奶同名。

Ross

Still, you- you say Minnie, you hear Mouse. Um, how about, um.. how about Julia?

不管怎样，听到这个还是想到老鼠。朱莉亚如何？

Carol

Julia..

朱莉亚？

Susan

We agreed on Minnie.

我们决定用米妮。

Ross

'S'funny, um, uh, we agreed we'd spend the rest of our lives together. Things change, roll with the punches. I believe Julia's on the table..?

真幽默，我们曾决定共同生活一辈子，世事难料，兵来将挡。茱莉亚，就这么决定？

Barry

Sorry about that. So. What have you been up to?

抱歉，近来可好？

Rachel

Oh, not much. I-I got a job.

混得过去，我刚找到工作。

Barry

Oh, that's great.

这太好了。

Rachel

Why are- why are you so tanned?

你为何晒得这么黑？

Barry

Oh, I, uh- I went to Aruba.

我到阿鲁巴了。

Rachel

Oh no. You went on our honeymoon alone?

你自己一个去渡蜜月？

Barry

No. I went with, uh.. Now, this may hurt.

不是，我和……你也许会很不好受。

Robbie

Me?!

我？

Barry

No! (To Rachel) I went with Mindy.

不！（对瑞秋）我和明蒂去了。

Rachel

Mindy?! My maid of honour, Mindy?!

我的伴娘明蒂？

Barry

Yeah, well, uh, we're kind of a thing now.

对，我们是认真的。

Rachel

Oh! Well, um.. (Grabs his forehead) You've got plugs!

（抓住他的额头）你去做植发了？

Barry

Careful! They haven't quite taken yet.

小心，还不固定。

Rachel

And you've got lenses! But you hate sticking your finger in your eye!

你何时配隐形眼镜的？你不是讨厌将手指放进眼睛吗？

Barry

Not for her. Listen, I really wanted to thank you.

还不是为了她。我真的得感谢你。

Rachel

Okay..

嗯。

Barry

See, about a month ago, I wanted to hurt you. More than I've ever wanted to hurt anyone in my life. And I'm an orthodontist.

一个月前我想伤害你，我从未如此激动过，我是个整牙医师。

Rachel

Wow.

哇。

Barry

You know, you were right? I mean, I thought we were happy. We weren't happy. But with Mindy, now I'm happy. Spit.

你说得没错，我以为我们会过得很快乐，我们不快乐。但是和明蒂在一起，现在我很快乐。吐掉。

Rachel

What?

什么？

Robbie

Me. (Spits.)

和我说。（吐掉。）

Rachel

Anyway, um, (Gets the ring out of her purse.) I guess this belongs to you. And thank you for giving it to me.

总之，这东西属于你的，谢谢你送给我。

Barry

Well, thank you for giving it back.

谢谢你送还给我。

(Barry and Rachel look at each other.)

（巴瑞和瑞秋对视。）

Robbie

Hello?!

拜托！

Susan

Oh, please! What's wrong with Helen?

拜托，海伦有什么不好？

Ross

Helen Geller? I don't think so.

海伦·盖勒？不行。

Carol

Hello? It's not gonna be Helen Geller.

她不会叫海伦·盖勒的。

Ross

Thank you!

谢谢！

Carol

No, I mean it's not Geller.

不，我是说她不姓盖勒。

Ross

What, it's gonna be Helen Willick?

难道她叫海伦·威利克？

Carol

No, actually, um, we talked about Helen Willick-Bunch.

不，老实说我们考虑用海伦·威利克·班奇。

Ross

Well, wait a minute, wha- why is she in the title?

等等，为何有她的份？

Susan

It's my baby too.

因为她也是我的宝宝。

Ross

Oh, 's'funny, really? Um, I don't remember you making any sperm.

是吗？我不记得女人也会制造精子。

Susan

Yeah, and we all know what a challenge that is!

我们都知道那是个极大的挑战。

Carol

All right, you two, stop it!

够了，你们两个，别吵了！

Ross

No no no, she gets a credit, hey, I'm in there too.

不，功劳全让她抢了，我也在场。

Carol

Ross. You're not actually suggesting Helen Willick-Bunch-Geller? 'Cause I think that borders on child abuse.

罗斯，你该不会想用海伦·威利克·班奇·盖勒吧？因为这有虐待儿童之嫌。

Ross

Of course not, I'm... suggesting Geller-Willick-Bunch.

当然没有，我想用盖勒·威利克·班奇。

Susan

Oh, no, nonononono, you see what he's doing? He knows no-one's gonna say all those names, so they'll wind up calling her Geller, then he gets his way!

绝对不行，你看他，没人会叫她全名的。他知道别人只会叫她盖勒，这样他就得逞了。

Ross

My way?! You think this is my way? Believe me, of all the ways I ever imagined this moment in my life being, this is not my way- y'know what? Uh, um, this is too hard. I'm not, I can't do-

我得逞？你认为这样算我得逞？相信我，我没想到自己会沦落到这种地步，我是不得已的……

Dr. Oberman

(entering) Knock knock! How are we today? Any nausea?

（进来）有人在吗？今天如何，想呕吐吗？

All

Yeah. Yeah. A little.

只是一点点。

Dr. Oberman

Well, I was just wondering about the mother-to-be, but.. thanks for sharing. (To Carol) Uh, lie back..

我只是问准妈妈，很感谢你们的分享。（对卡罗）躺好。

Ross

You- uh- y'know what, I'm gonna go. I don't- I don't think I can be involved in this particular thing right now.

知道吗？我不加入，我认为此时自己无法淌入这浑水。

(He turns to go, but the sound of the sonogram catches his ear. He returns and stares at it.)

（他转身要走，但超音波的声音吸引了他。他回来盯着屏幕。）

Ross

Oh my God.

我的天呀。

Susan

Look at that.

看啊。

Carol

I know.

我知道。

Closing Credits

片尾

Ross

Well? Isn't that amazing?

很神奇吧？

Joey

What are we supposed to be seeing here?

我们该看到什么？

Chandler

I don't know, but.. I think it's about to attack the Enterprise.

我不知道，可能是要攻击企业号。

Phoebe

You know, if you tilt your head to the left, and relax your eyes, it kinda looks like an old potato.

如果你们把头稍微向左偏，两眼放轻松，它看起来就像是一颗老马铃薯。

Ross

Then don't do that, alright?

那么就不要那么干。

Phoebe

Okay!

好吧！

Ross

(walks over to where Monica is standing) Monica. What do you think?

（走到莫妮卡身旁）莫妮卡，你认为呢？

Monica

(welling up) Mm-hmm.

（热泪盈眶）嗯。

Ross

Wh- are you welling up?

你热泪盈眶？

Monica

No.

才没那。

Ross

You are, you're welling up.

你有，你热泪盈眶。

Monica

Am not!

我没有！

Ross

You're gonna be an aunt.

你就要成为阿姨了。

Monica

(pushes him and starts to cry) Oh shut up!

（推他，哭出来）闭嘴！

Rachel

(on phone) Hi, Mindy. Hi, it's Rachel. Yeah, I'm fine. I-I saw Barry today. Oh, yeah, yeah he told me. No, no, it's okay. I hope you two are very happy, I really do. Oh, oh, and Mind, y'know, if everything works out, and you guys end up getting married and having kids- and everything- I just hope they have his old hairline and your old nose. (Slams the phone down.) (To everyone) Okay, I know it was a cheap shot, but I feel so much better now.

（打电话）明蒂，我是瑞秋。我很好，我今天和巴瑞见面了。不，他告诉我了，没关系，真的。对，他告诉我了，我诚心祝福你们幸福快乐。如果一切顺利，你们结婚生子，希望他们有他的发线和你的鼻子。（挂断电话）（对大家）我知道这招很贱，但我感觉好棒。