The One With Joey's Award

Joey

Hey! You guys! You're not gonna believe this! I just got off the phone with my agent...

嗨！你们不会相信的！我刚刚接到经纪人的电话……

Phoebe

Oh my God! (Joey looks at her.) I'm sorry, too soon. You go.

哦 天呐！对不起，反应太快，继续。

Joey

Okay. I got nominated for my part on Days of Our Lives!

我因为在《光辉岁月》里的表演而被提名了！

Monica

Joey!

乔伊！

Phoebe

Good for you!

太好了！

Monica

Congratulations! Wow! I can't believe you're nominated for an Emmy!

祝贺你！哇！我不敢相信你获得艾美奖提名！

Joey

No-no.

不-不是。

Monica

Oh Soap Opera Digest award!

肥皂剧文摘年度奖？

Joey

No! I'm up for a Soapie!

不是！我被提名Soapie（肥皂剧）奖！

Monica

Honey? Is that something you're making up?

亲爱的？这是你编出来的，对吧？

Joey

No, no, no! It's real! And it has been since 1998. (Rachel returns from the bathroom.) Hey Rach! Rach! I'm up for a Soapie!

不，不，不！这是真的！从1998年设立到现在。（瑞秋从浴室回来。）嗨 瑞秋！瑞秋！我被提名Soapie奖！

Rachel

(gasps) Oh my God! Oh my God!! That is like the third most prestigious soap opera award there is!

（倒吸一口气）哦 我的天！哦 我的天！！这可是排名第三的肥皂剧奖！

Joey

Thank you! Well, I guess now I know who I'm taking to the awards. (Points to Rachel.)

谢谢！好吧，我想我知道该带谁去领奖了。（指向瑞秋。）

Rachel

Oh, stop that! Don't kid about that! (Gasps) Will all the stars be there?

哦，别说了！别开玩笑！（倒吸一口气）大明星都会去吗？

Joey

Many are scheduled to appear.

很多都有这个打算。

Rachel

Oh my God! Oh my God! I can't go! I'm gonna be too nervous!

哦 天呐！哦 天呐！我不能去！我会紧张死的！

Monica

(to Joey) Okay, I'll go!

（对乔伊）那好，我去！

Rachel

No!! You are getting married! This is all I have.

不！！你要结婚了！这就是我的全部。

Opening Credits

片头字幕

Ross

...and it was Ernst Muhlbrat who first hypothesized that the Velociraptor would expand it's collar and emit a high pitched noise to frighten it's predator. (A student raises his hand.) Yes Mr. Lewis?

……是Ernst Muhlbrat最先假设速龙会竖起它的颈片，发出高频率的声音以恐吓它的敌人。（一个学生举手。）什么事，刘易斯？

Lewis

What kinda noise?

什么样的声音？

Ross

Just a high pitched intimidating noise.

是一种高频率的威胁性的叫声。

Lewis

But like how?

但是到底是怎么样的？

Ross

Well we-we don't know for sure. But in my head it-it sounded something like this. (He makes a high pitched noise and Alan doesn't know what to make of it.) Of course, this is just conjecture. Okay, that's uh, that's all for today. (Everyone starts to get up.) Uh Mr. Morse, can I see you for a moment?

我们-我们不是很清楚。但根据我的观点它-它叫起来应该像这样。（他发出一种高频率的声音，艾伦不知该作何反应。）当然，这只是推测。好吧，今天-今天就上到这。（大家都开始起身。）呃，莫斯，我能和你谈谈吗？

Morse

Yes sir.

是的，先生。

Ross

Mr. Morse I need to talk to you about your mid-term exam, I'm afraid I-I had to fail you.

莫斯先生，我得跟你谈谈期中考试的事，恐怕我不能让你及格。

Morse

(shocked) Why?!

（震惊）为什么？！

Ross

Well you need 60% to pass...

你还差60分才及格……

Morse

What'd I get?

我得了几分？

Ross

Seven.

7分。

Morse

That's not so good.

不算太好。

Ross

No-no it's not. What-what happened there Ned?

不，不好。怎么回事，Ned？

Morse

Well maybe you can cut me some slack. I'm sort of in love.

也许你可通融一下，我恋爱了。

Ross

Well I'm sorry but, that-that's really not my problem.

很遗憾，但这这-真的不是我的问题。

Morse

I'm in love with you.

我爱上你了。

Ross

Well that brings me in the loop a little.

这让我有点受宠若惊。

Morse

You see, that's why I did so bad on this test. I'm having a hard time concentrating. When you're up there (Points to the podium) and you're teaching and your face gets all serious...you look so good. (In a sexy voice) You wear that tight little turtleneck sweater...

你看，这就是我考砸的原因。我没办法集中精神。你站在那开始上课，你的表情那么严肃……看起来帅呆了。（用性感的声音）你穿着那件小小的紧身圆领毛衣……

Ross

Okay! (Walks away from him.) Umm, I uh, I'm your teacher. I'm sorry, you're-you're a student and I-and I like women. In spite of what may be written on the backs of some of these chairs.

好了！（从他身边走开。）嗯，我是你的老师，对不起，你是学生，而且我喜欢的是女人。不管别人在一些椅子的背后写了些什么。

Phoebe

Oh my God! That guy at the counter is totally checking you out!

哦 天呐！柜台旁边的那个男人一直在盯着你！

Monica

Really? (Looks.) My God, he's really cute.

真的？（看。）天呐，他真可爱。

Phoebe

Go for it.

过去泡他。

Monica

Phoebe, I'm engaged!

菲比，我订婚了！

Phoebe

I'm just saying, get his number just in case. But no Chandler is in an accident and can't perform sexually and he would want you to take a lover to satisfy the needs that he can no longer fulfill.

我是说让你问问他电话以防万一，要是钱德发生什么意外不能人道的话，他可能会希望你找个情人来满足他没法满足你的需要。

The Cute Guy

(To Monica) Hi!

（对莫妮卡）嗨！

Monica

Op, can I just tell you something? Very flattered but umm, I'm engaged. (Points to her ring.)

哦，我是不是应该先告诉你？我很受宠若惊，但是，我已经订婚了。（指着戒指。）

The Cute Guy

Wow! Uh, this is kind of embarrassing. I was actually coming over to talk to your friend.

哇！呃，这有点尴尬。实际上我是过来和你朋友打个招呼。

Monica

Well you should be embarrassed. (Leaves.)

你是该感到难为情。（离开。）

The Cute Guy

(To Phoebe) I thought you knew I was looking at you.

（对菲比）我想你们知道我在看你们。

Phoebe

I did, but that was really fun.

是的，不过真的很有趣。

Joey

(pretending to be an announcer) And the winner is...Joey Tribbiani! (He then gets excited and goes over to the counter to practice his acceptance speech using a bottle of maple syrup as the award.) Oh... Wow! I honestly never expected this. I uh, I didn't prepare a speech. But umm, I'd like to thank (Rachel enters quietly) my parents, who've always been there for me. I'd also like to thank my friends, Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, Rachel...

（假装播音员）获奖者是……乔伊·崔比昂尼！（然后他兴奋地走到柜台前，用一瓶枫糖浆当作奖杯练习获奖感言。）哦……哇！我真的没有想到过会获奖。我呃，我没有准备讲稿。但是，嗯，我想感谢我的父母，他们一直在那里支持我。我还要感谢我的朋友，钱德、莫妮卡、菲比、瑞秋……

Rachel

I'm fourth! (Joey is startled.) Look at you with your little maple syrup award!

我才排第四？（乔伊吓了一跳。）看看你还有你拿的糖枫汁奖！

Joey

Yeah may-maybe you don't tell anyone about this.

是的，也许你不会告诉别人？

Rachel

What? No! It's not a big deal! I do that too, with my shampoo bottle.

什么？不！这没什么大不了的！我干过两次，拿我的香槟酒瓶子。

Joey

Really?

真的？

Rachel

Yeah.

是的。

Joey

What award are you practicing for?

你练习的是什么奖？

Rachel

Grammy, Best New Artist.

格莱美奖，最佳新秀。

Joey

Oh, hey listen! The Soapie's called today and I also get to present an award.

哦，嘿，今天Soapie奖组织者打电话过来说我得上台颁奖。

Rachel

Ohh that's great!

哦，太好了！！

Joey

Yeah!

是的！

Rachel

So you'll definitely get onstage, even if you don't win.

这么说你肯定会上台，就算不是上去领奖。

Joey

(confused) What you-you don't think I'm gonna win?

（困惑）你-你认为我不会获胜？

Rachel

Well of course I do! But y'know, favorite returning character is a tough category Joey. I mean you're up against the guy who survived his own cremation.

当然不！但是你知道，最受欢迎男演员竞争很激烈，乔伊。我是说你要和那个从火葬场死里逃生的家伙竞争。

Joey

Yeah. No-no I-I know I might not win, but it's just...I've never even been nominated before! I want it so much.

是的，我知道可能会输，但是……我从来没获得过提名！我太想得到这个奖了。

Rachel

Well Joey, you'll probably get it. But you should probably your-your gracious loser face. Y'know when like the cameras are on you and you wanna look disappointed but also that your colleague deserved to win. Y'know? So it's sorta like... (Does it, you'll have to see it.)

乔伊，你或许会得奖。但是万一失败了你应该有得体的表现。当镜头对着你的时候你要表现得有点失望，但是又觉得你的同行应该获奖的样子，你明白吗？就像这样……（做表情。）

Joey

Hey! (Likes it.)

嘿！（喜欢。）

Rachel

Y'know?

很好。

Joey

You practice losing the Grammies too?

你也练习过失去格莱美奖？

Rachel

Oh no, at the Grammies I always win.

哦，不，格莱美奖我从不失手。

Joey

Ah.

啊。

Phoebe

Oh hey!

哦，嘿！

Monica

Hey! How'd your date go with Jake?

嘿！你和Jake的约会怎么样？

Phoebe

Oh, great! We couldn't keep our eyes off each other all night and then every once and a while y'know, he'd kinda lean over and stroke my hair and touch my neck. (Does that to Monica.)

哦，棒极了！我们整晚视线都没有离开过对方，每一次那个你知道，他都俯下身来抚摸我的头发，触摸我的颈项。（对莫妮卡做动作。）

Monica

Okay, stop it Phoebe, you're getting me all tingly.

好吧，别这样，菲比，你让我浑身发麻。

Phoebe

(laughs) All I could think of was y'know, "Is he gonna kiss me? Is he gonna kiss me?"

（笑）你知道我惟一能想的就是，“他会吻我吗？他会吻我吗？”

Monica

And did he?

他吻你了？

Phoebe

I'm a lady Monica, I don't kiss and tell. But this hickey speaks for itself. (She starts to open up her blouse.)

我是个淑女，莫妮卡，我接吻的时候不说话。但是这小东西自己会说话。（她开始解开衬衫。）

Monica

Okay-okay, I got it. I got it.

我明白，我明白。

Phoebe

I just like him so much that I just feel like I've had 10 drinks today and I've only had six.

我真的很喜欢他，我觉得自己就像喝了10杯酒，实际上我今天只喝了6杯。

Monica

Oh, I haven't had that feeling since I first started going out with Chandler. Wow, I'm never gonna have that feeling again am I?

哦，自从我和钱德开始交往后我就再也没有过这种感觉。哇，我不会再有这种感觉了对吗？

Phoebe

You sound like a guy.

你听起来像个男人。

Monica

No, a guy would be saying, "I'm never gonna get to sleep with anyone else." Oh my God! I'm never gonna get to sleep with anyone else! I've been so busy planning the wedding that I forgot about all the things that I'd be giving up! I mean, I...I'm never gonna have a first kiss again.

不，男人会说，“我再也不能和其他女人睡觉了。”哦，我的天！我再也不能和其他男人睡觉了！我一直在忙着筹备婚礼，都忘记了我将要放弃的一切！我是说，我……我再也不会有第一次接吻了。

Phoebe

You'll have a last kiss.

你会有最后一吻。

Ross

Can I ask you something? Have you ever had a guy have a crush on you?

我能问你个问题吗？你被男人迷上过吗？

Joey

Is that why you wanted to tie my tie?

这就是你给我打领带的理由？

Ross

There's this kid in my class who said he's in love with me.

我的班上有个孩子说他爱上我了。

Joey

Whoa!

喔！

Rachel

(entering from her room) Whoa what?

（从房间出来）喔什么？

Joey

Ross has a boyfriend.

罗斯有个男朋友。

Ross

I do-I do not have a boyfriend. There's a guy in one of my classes who-who has a crush on me.

我-我没有男朋友。我的班上有个孩子说他爱上我了。

Rachel

Really?

真的吗？

Ross

Yeah! I don't know. I mean, last year Elizabeth now-now this kid. What-what-what-what is it?! Am I giving out some kind of...sexy professor vibe? (Rachel and Joey both look at him.)

是的！我不知道，我是说，去年是伊莎贝拉，现在是这个孩子。到底是怎么回事？！我是不是散发出一种……性感教授的味道？（瑞秋和乔伊都看着他。）

Rachel

Not right now.

现在没有。

Ross

It-it---The point is my natural charisma has made him fail his midterm.

我的意思是，是我天生的超凡魅力让他期中考试不及格。

Rachel

Oh, see now I feel bad for the kid! I had a crush on a teacher once and it was so hard! Y'know you---I couldn't concentrate and I blushed every time he looked at me. I mean come on, you remember what's it's like to be 19 and in love.

哦，我替那个孩子感到难过！我曾经迷上过老师，那真的很痛苦！你知道，我没法集中注意力，每次他看我我都会脸红。我是说，就像19岁的我们恋爱的感觉。

Ross

Yeah. I guess I can cut him some slack.

是的，我想我可以对他通融一下。

Rachel

Yeah.

是的。

Joey

How'd you get over that teacher?

最后你怎么摆脱那个老师的？

Rachel

I didn't. I got under him.

我没有摆脱他，我让他拜倒在我的石榴裙下。

Joey

(To Ross) Problem solved.

（对罗斯）问题解决。

Jake

Bye Phoebe.

Jake：再见，菲比。

Phoebe

Okay bye. (They kiss.)

好吧，再见。（他们接吻。）

Jake

All right. Bye. (Backs out the door.)

Jake：好了，再见。（退出门口。）

Phoebe

Bye! (Phoebe goes over and joins Monica on the couch.) We said good-bye at the door so as not to flaunt our new love.

再见！（菲比走过去和莫妮卡一起坐在沙发上。）我们在门口说再见，这样不会太招摇。

Monica

Phoebe, it's okay. You don't have to tip toe around me. I-I've been thinking about it and umm, y'know what? I'm okay about not having that new relationship feeling...

菲比，好吧，你没必要在我旁边转来转去。我已经想过了，你知道吗？失去新鲜的恋爱感觉没什么，我不在乎……

Jake

(yelling through the window to Phoebe) I miss you already!!

Jake：（隔着窗户对菲比喊）我开始想你了！！

Phoebe

(yelling back) I miss you too!!!! (He walks away.)

（喊回去）我也想你！！！！（他走开了。）

Monica

See? That's what I mean. I mean that, that's great! But I wouldn't trade in what I have for that. I mean I'm gonna be with Chandler for the rest of my life, and that's what makes me happy. (Chandler approaches.) Hey sweetie, come here! Come sit down. Hey Phoebe and I were just talking about how our relationship is deep and meaningful. It really is don't you think?

看见了？这就是我说的，我是说，这很好！但是我不会拿现在拥有的东西去换。我是说，我将和钱德共度余生，这才是让我开心的事。（钱德走过来。）嗨，亲爱的，过来！过来坐这。我和菲比正在谈我们的感情多深多有意义，真的是这样，你说呢？

Chandler

Oh totally! (Holds up his finger.) Pull my finger.

哦，绝对是！（举起手指。）拉着我的手指。

Announcer

Presenting the award for Favorite Returning Male Character is McKensize...

颁发最受欢迎男演员奖的是McKensize……

Joey

(To Rachel) This is it! This is my category.

（对瑞秋）来了！来了，这是我被提名的奖项。

Rachel

I know! My God! Do you have your speech?

我知道！天呐！你准备演讲了吗？

Joey

Yeah, I got my speech!

是的，准备了！

Rachel

Do you got your gracious loser face?

失败者得体的表情呢？

Joey

Yeah. (Does it.)

是的。（做表情。）

Rachel

Now Joey remember, if you win you have to hug me! You hug me!

乔伊，记住，你获奖的话要拥抱我！拥抱我！

Joey

Okay. Can I squeeze your ass?

好的。我能轻轻捏你的屁股吗？

Rachel

On TV?! Yeah!

在电视上？！行！

Joey

'Kay!

好的！

The Presenter

...in the category of Favorite Returning Male Character the nominees are: John Wheeler from General Hospital (Applause), Gavin Grant from The Young and the Restless (Applause), Dunkin Harrington from Passions (Applause), and Joey Tribbiani from Days of Our Lives (Applause). And the Soapie goes to...(She opens the envelope)...Gavin Grant from The Young and the Restless!

约翰·惠勒，《中央医院》；加文·格兰特，《年轻的躁动》；达金·哈灵顿，《激情燃烧的岁月》；乔伊·崔比昂尼，《光辉岁月》。获奖者是……（打开信封）……加文·格兰特，《年轻的躁动》！

Joey

What the?! (Joey pounds the table and starts yelling at Rachel, and which is drowned out by applause. Rachel is desperately trying to tell Joey that he's on TV right now. He finally notices and he does his gracious loser face.)

什么？！（乔伊捶桌子，开始对瑞秋大喊，但被掌声淹没。瑞秋拼命想告诉他他现在在电视上。他终于注意到了，做了他得体的失败者表情。）

Commercial Break

广告时间

Announcer

Presenting the award for Favorite Supporting Actress is Joey Tribbiani from Days of Our Lives. (Applause as Joey angrily walks to the podium and eyes the trophy.)

颁发最受观众支持女演员奖的是乔伊·崔比昂尼，来自《光辉岁月》。（乔伊生气地走向讲台，盯着奖杯，掌声响起。）

Joey

(angrily and monotone) Any one of the brilliant actresses nominated for this award tonight deserves to take it home. Unfortunately only one can. (Shakes his head in disgust.) The nominees for Best Supporting Actress are from Passions Erin Goff. (There is applause, which Joey disgustedly waits to dye out.) From One Life to Live Mary Loren Bishop (They start to applaud again, but Joey interrupts in with the rest of the nominees), from All My Children Sarah Mchann, and from Days of Our Lives Jessica Ashley. And the winner is...(Opens the envelope)...Jessica Ashley from Days of Our Lives. (Applause) Uh, unfortunately Jessica couldn't be with us tonight so I'll be accepting this award on her behalf. (Realizes something) And I'm sure that Jessica would like to thank my parents who always believed in me. She'd also like to thank my friends, Chandler, Monica, Ross, Phoebe, and Rachel who's sittin' right there! (Points at Rachel.) (The music starts and his microphone is turned off, this angers Joey again and he disgustedly exits.)

钱德、莫妮卡、罗斯、菲比，还有瑞秋，她就坐在那儿！（指向瑞秋。）（音乐响起，他的麦克风被关掉，这再次激怒了乔伊，他厌恶地离场。）

Rachel

Joey! Why did we have to rush out of there so fast?!

乔伊！为什么我们要跑那么快？！

Joey

Rach we had to get out of there because, look what I won! (He whips out the award for Best Supporting Actress that he accepted for Jessica.)

瑞秋，我们得赶快离开，因为，看我拿回来什么！（他掏出他替杰西卡领取的最佳女配角奖杯。）

Rachel

Oh my God you stole her award!

哦 我的天，你偷了她的奖杯！

Joey

No-no! No, I'm accepting it on her behalf. (He puts it up above the TV to display it.)

不-不！不，我是以她的名义接受这个奖项。（他把它放在电视机上方展示。）

Rachel

Joey I don't think you know what behalf means.

乔伊，我想你不知道“名义”是什么意思。

Joey

Sure I do! It's a verb! As in, "I behalfin' it!"

我当然知道！是个动词！就像“我名义它！”

Rachel

Joey, you have got to take this back!

乔伊，你得把它还回去！

Joey

But why?! I should've won one and I really want it and she didn't even care enough to come to the thing! It could also be a Grammy.

为什么？！我应该获得一个奖杯，而且我真的想得到它。可她一点都不在乎，甚至不来参加颁奖！这也可以是格莱美奖。

Rachel

(looking at the award) No! Joey!

（看着奖杯）不！乔伊！

Joey

Come on Rach! No one saw me take it! There was a whole table full of 'em.

来吧，瑞秋！没人看见我们！这玩意儿那有一桌子呢。

Rachel

Do you really want an award you didn't win?

你真的想要不是你赢回来的奖吗？

Joey

No! I want an award I did win! But nobody's giving me any of those! Plus---Hey Rach, if-if I put it up there (Points to the TV) right? When people come over they'll see it and they'll think I won it.

不！我想要自己赢回来的奖！但是没人颁给我！还有——嘿，瑞秋，如果我把它放在那（指电视）对吧？别人过来看见，他们会以为是我获的奖。

Rachel

Joey is says Best Supporting Actress!

乔伊，这上面写着“最受欢迎女演员”！

Joey

I can scratch that right off.

我可以把它刮掉。

Rachel

Joey no, this is wrong! You have to take it back, okay? You don't want to win an award this way. You're very talented. And someday you're gonna win one of these for real and that one is gonna mean something.

不，乔伊，这是错的！你得把它还回去，好吗？你不想这样赢奖。你很有才能，总有一天你会获得一个真正的奖杯，这个会变得毫无意义。

Joey

All right!

好吧！

Rachel

All right? (He sets the award down.) Thank you.

好吗？（他放下奖杯。）谢谢。

Joey

I'll take it back tomorrow.

我明天把它还回去。

Rachel

Thank you.

谢谢。

(He goes into his room and closes the door. Rachel goes to pick it up and...)

（他走进房间关上门。瑞秋去拿奖杯，然后……）

Joey

(opening his door) If I can't have it you can't have it! (Rachel walks away angrily.)

（打开门）如果我有就等于你有！（瑞秋生气地走开。）

Lewis

Professor Geller?

盖勒教授？

Ross

(turning towards him) Yes Mr. Lewis, how can I help you?

（转向他）是的，刘易斯，我能为你做什么吗？

Lewis

I know I didn't do well on my midterms and stuff but, I was kinda hoping you could change my grade.

我知道我期中考表现不是很好，但是，我希望你能改变我的成绩。

Ross

And why exactly would I do that? (Goes back to writing on the board.)

我为什么要这么做？（回到黑板继续写。）

Lewis

Because I'm in love with you.

因为我爱你。

Ross

(turning around and dragging the chalk down the board) What?!

（转身，粉笔在黑板上划下一道）什么？！

Lewis

Yeah, I'm all...in love with you and stuff. So could you change my grade?

是的，我爱上你，还有你的一举一动。所以你能改变我的成绩吗？

Ross

No!

不！

Lewis

Well why not you changed Ned's grade!

为什么？你改动了Ned的成绩！

Ross

Well that's different! Okay? Because he, he was actually in love with me!

好吧，这不一样！因为他，他真的爱上我！

Lewis

No he's not! He's totally yanking your chain! He's done this with three other teachers!

不，他没有！他完全是在耍你！他已经对三个老师用过这招了！

Ross

What?

什么？

Lewis

He's got a girlfriend!

他有女朋友！

Ross

I can't believe someone would do that for a grade.

不敢相信有人会为了成绩这样做。

Lewis

I know! It's awful. I love you.

我知道！这样做很烂。我爱你。

(Ross glares at him.)

（罗斯瞪着他。）

Monica

Have you seen Chandler?

你看到钱德了吗？

Phoebe

No. Why?

不，为什么？

Monica

'Cause I just keeping thinking about all these things that I'm not gonna have and it's freaking me out. I don't know what to do about it.

因为我一直在考虑所有我将失去的东西，这让我心神不宁，我不知道该怎么做。

Phoebe

Okay, don't sweat it. (Looking around her.) Chandler is nowhere around so go ahead get it out of your system. That guy's cute. (Points to a guy sitting behind Monica.)

好吧，别着急。（环顾四周。）钱德不在这，所以你说吧，别管他。那个男人很可爱。（指向坐在莫妮卡后面的男人。）

Monica

Phoebe! Come on I'm serious! I just got to talk to him about all this.

菲比！拜托，我是认真的！我得跟他谈谈。

Phoebe

No that is the last thing you want to do!

不，这是你最后的选择！

Monica

Why?

为什么？

Phoebe

Because you're marrying him!

因为你要嫁给他！

Monica

You gotta help me out here Pheebs.

他得帮我，菲比。

Phoebe

All right, I've never been engaged and I've never really been married, but I can only tell you what my mother told me. Whenever you have doubts or fears or anxieties about a relationship, do not communicate them to your husband.

好吧，我没订过婚也没真正结过婚，我只能告诉你我妈说过的话。要是你对一段感情有怀疑、恐惧或者焦虑的话，不要告诉你的丈夫。

Monica

So I'm not supposed to share my doubts and fears with the guy I'm gonna spend the rest of my life with?

所以我不应该告诉那个我将要与之共度余生的男人我的怀疑和恐惧？

Phoebe

That is correct! Yes, you're supposed to take all of that stuff and put it in a little box in your mind and then lock it up tight.

没错！是的，你应该把所有这些藏起来，放在记忆深处的一个小盒子里，然后锁紧它。

Monica

Your mother told you this?

你妈妈跟你说的？

Phoebe

Yes!

是的！

Monica

The woman that got married a bunch of times and killed herself when you were 13?

那个结过好几次婚并且在你13岁的时候自杀的女人？

Phoebe

Oh my God! You're right! Go! (Monica starts to leave.) Go tell Chandler! Hurry before it's too late! Wait no! (Monica stops.) Does this also mean putting out doesn't get you love? (Monica is shocked.)

哦 我的天！你是对的！快去！（莫妮卡准备离开。）快去告诉钱德！快点，趁还来得及！不，等等！（莫妮卡停下。）这是不是说你对作爱不感兴趣了？（莫妮卡震惊。）

Rachel

I cannot believe I'm gonna meet Jessica Ashley!

真不敢相信我会见到杰西卡·阿什莉！

Joey

Okay wait-wait p-please be cool! Okay? I work with this woman.

好的，等等-等等，冷静一点！好吗？我和这女人一起工作。

Rachel

Okay, I'm totally cool! (She coolly knocks on the door)

好的，我很冷静！（她冷静地敲门。）

Jessica Ashley

Come in.

请进。

(They enter.)

（他们进去。）

Joey

Hey Jessica.

嗨，杰西卡。

Rachel

(coolly) Hey Jess.

（冷静地）嗨，杰斯。

Joey

Ah, this is my friend Rachel.

啊，这是我朋友瑞秋。

Jessica Ashley

Hi.

嗨。

Rachel

'Sup? (Joey glares at her.)

怎么样？（乔伊瞪她。）

Joey

Uh listen, here's your Soapie. I accepted it for ya. (Hands it to her.)

呃听着，这是你的Soapie奖，我帮你领回来了。（递给她。）

Jessica Ashley

(shocked) Oh my God! I won! Do you have any idea what this means?! (She rolls her eyes and throws it onto the couch.)

（震惊）哦 我的天！我获奖了！你知道这意味着什么吗？！（她翻了个白眼，把它扔到沙发上。）

Joey

Well, that-that-that's it? You're gonna, you're gonna put it on your shelf or anything?

就——就这样？你不打算，你不打算把它摆在架子上或者其他什么的吗？

Jessica Ashley

No, I try to save that for real awards. Now, if you'll excuse me. (She exits.)

不，我要留着放真正的奖杯。现在，如果你们不介意的话。（她离开。）

Joey

(To Rachel) Take it back?

（对瑞秋）拿回去？

Rachel

Absolutely.

完全正确。

Joey

Y-y-yeah! (As they start to leave, Rachel pauses and steals a vase with flowers in it.) Yeah you do. (They exit.)

干得好！（当他们准备离开时，瑞秋停下来偷了一个插着花的花瓶。）没错。（他们离开。）

Monica

Honey, as we get closer to the wedding, is there anything that you would like to talk about or share?

亲爱的，婚礼越来越近了，你有什么事情想跟我说吗？

Chandler

Okay. Well, I think the centerpieces are too big.

好吧，我想餐桌中间的摆设太大了。

Monica

You're wrong! The centerpieces are fine! Do you ever get scared at all?

你错了！餐桌中间的摆设很好！你害怕过吗？

Chandler

Kinda. They're really big.

有点，那些摆设真的很大。

Monica

Doesn't it ever just freak you out that-that you're never gonna be with anybody new again?

你有没有不安过，因为你再也不会有新的浪漫关系？

Chandler

What?

什么？

Monica

Just, I love you so much. Just...It's just sometimes it bothers me that I'm never gonna have that feeling. Y'know when you meet someone for the first time and it's new and exciting? Y'know that rush?

我很爱你，只是……只是有时候有些事会困扰我，我将失去那种感觉。你知道当你第一次邂逅某个人的时候，那种新鲜感还有兴奋感？你知道那种感觉？

Chandler

No. No, see when I first meet somebody it's uh it's mostly panic, anxiety, and a great deal of sweating.

不，不，通常当我第一次遇见某个人的时候，我会恐慌、焦虑，还会一直出汗。

Monica

Okay, but all right you're a guy, does it not freak you that you're never gonna sleep with anybody else?

好吧，但是你是个男人，你再也不能和其他女人上床，你不为此感到不安吗？

Chandler

Sleeping with somebody new, anxiety, panic, and I'm afraid even more sweating.

不，和刚认识的女人上床，会让我恐慌、焦虑，还会流更多的汗。

Monica

Even with me?

就算和我在一起？

Chandler

I was dangerously dehydrated during the first six months of our relationship. (Monica laughs.) Look, for me the rush is knowing that we are gonna be together for the rest of our lives.

和你在一起的前六个月我差点脱水而死。（莫妮卡笑。）你看，对我来说，最让人激动的事就是知道自己将和你共度余生。

Monica

Really?

真的吗？

Chandler

Well yeah! But now that I know that you're having these thoughts, I'm back to panic, anxiety, and uh I'm definitely gonna need some kind of sports drink.

真的！但是现在我知道你的想法，我又开始恐慌、焦虑，呃，我需要来点运动饮料。

Monica

Come here! Come here! (They hug.) Sweetie you don't have to worry. No, besides y'know what? I'm gonna have a lot of new things with you. The first time we buy a house. Our first kid. Our first grandkid...

过来！过来！（他们拥抱。）亲爱的，你不需要担心。你知道，除了这些以外，我们还将拥有很多新的东西。我们第一次买房子，我们第一次有孩子，第一个可爱的孩子……

Chandler

(hoarsely) Water! Water! Water!

（沙哑地）水！水！水！

Ross

Uh Mr. Morse, can I speak to you for a moment?

莫斯，我能和你谈一会儿吗？

Morse

(walking up) That was a great lecture today. Did you get a little hair cut?

（走过来）今天的讲座真是棒极了，你把头发理了？

Ross

Uh-hmm, yeah-yeah do you like it? Do-do you looove it? I just want you to know that I'm changing your grade back.

嗯，是的，是的，你喜欢吗？你爱它们吗？我想告诉你我把你的成绩改回去了。

Morse

What?! Why?

什么？！为什么？

Ross

'Cause I know what you're trying to pull here. Okay? It's not gonna work.

因为我知道你想得到什么，好吧？这不管用。

Morse

I'm not trying to pull anything. Look I love you dude.

我没想过得到什么好处，我爱你，先生。

Ross

Y'know what? I-I'm not even gonna talk about this. Okay? This little thing is over. I know you have a girlfriend! Okay---(Ned looks shocked)---Yeah! And I know about the other professors! How do you think that makes me feel Ned?! You used me! You don't love me and you never did! (Ross turns around to make a grand exit but runs into two colleagues.) Ah Professor Winston, Professor Fredrickson, I'll be right with you. (To Ned) Don't make this worse and I'll give you a C. (To the professors) Shall we? (They leave.)

你想知道吗？我-我不想再谈这件事，好吧？这事结束了。我知道你有女朋友！（Ned看起来很震惊。）是的！我也知道你对其他教授干过的事！你知道我什么感觉吗，Ned？！你利用我！你不爱我，你也从来没爱过我！（罗斯转身准备潇洒离场，却撞上两位同事。）啊，温斯顿教授，弗雷德里克森教授，我马上过来。（对Ned）别把这事搞砸了，我就给你C。（对教授们）可以走了？（他们离开。）

Ending Credits

片尾字幕

Phoebe

Rach?

瑞秋？

Rachel

I'll be out in a second.

我很快出来。

(Phoebe notices the Soapie on the counter.)

（菲比注意到柜台上的Soapie奖杯。）

Phoebe

Oh. (Picks it up.) It's just so unexpected! I...I uh...Boy I'll tell you it's just such an honor to be nominated for a Nobel Prize and y'know to win one for a massage. Especially after having just won a Tony award for best actress in...

哦。（捡起来。）哦，这真是太意外了！我……我呃……告诉你，我感到很荣幸被提名诺贝尔奖，你知道因为按摩，特别是我刚刚获得托尼奖最佳女主角……

Rachel

(entering from her room) Honey, we have to go. Our reservations are at 8:00.

（从房间出来）亲爱的，我们得走了，我们订了8点的位子。

Phoebe

...in Reservations at 8:00 by Neil Simon. (To an imaginary Neil Simon) Thank-thank you Neil. Thank you for the words. (Blows him a kiss.)

……因为在Neil Simon的《8点的位子》一片中的表演。（对着想象中的Neil Simon）谢谢你，Neil，谢谢你的建议。（飞吻。）

Rachel

Okay honey, you can finish this later we're gonna be late. We gotta go.

亲爱的，你下次再继续吧，我们就快迟到了，我们得走了。

Phoebe

Please, don't play the music. Just uh one more. LIVE FROM NEW YORK! IT'S SATURDAY NIGHT!!

先别放音乐，我还有一句话要说。纽约直播！周六晚上！！

End

结束